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10 years ago
ATACdawg...was your brother Andy Kaufman?
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10 years ago
Want evidence? Check out trixxi's thread. That chick has Captain Kirk giving her fresh fish in a garbage bag. Pretty fuckin' coo-el if you as me.
With a capital COO and a capital EL!
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10 years ago
You know what really gets the girls' motors running LMN my brother? Nope, not money. Nor is it drugs. Apparently, it is a fresh salmon in a garbage bag! I betcha that any large fish will work, but the garbage bag has to be part of the magic.
So once...just once...lay off the drugs and have a whimsical weekend. Dress as the mad hatter. Speak only in iambic pentameter. And woo a stripper with a big ass fish!
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10 years ago
Wow -- an oldie but a goodie!
"Bus Stop" by the Hollies for me. A fave from many moons ago. But a seriously coo-el song for a seriously coo-el girl.
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10 years ago
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trixxiformer stripper is now an internet slut
This is quite possibly the strangest story on TUSCL since Juice's assertions that he would bring fried chicken to the club. Just tell the dude that you don't dig 15 lbs of salmon in a garbage bag and would prefer a spicy tuna roll. With XXXtra spicy sauce.
Se if he brings the sushi in a garbage bag.
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10 years ago
Agree with shark. Hot chicks should have a license that allows them to show as much skin as they want!
Ugly chicks and fat dudes...not so much.
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10 years ago
I'm not sure they were Princess Leia side buns Steve my man. But that would be coo-el.
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10 years ago
Hotstuff69babi should be insulted.
Ol' LMN never offered to taker her by his work to show her how he makes the onion rings and introduce her to his manager, Mr. McGee.
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10 years ago
True dat.
How long before we see an offer from LMN (or some permutation of those letters) inviting Dancinggal to visit Miami using an Amtrak coupon? Watch out for that dude -- he is a twisted lil cruller.
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10 years ago
@Dougster -- I think shark was wearing a spacesuit. And when he says "stripper" he actually means "grey alien from Zeta Reticuli".
However, when he says "anal probe" he does mean "anal probe".
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10 years ago
I didn't get through all of quadruple amputee dude's reviews. Gorilla role playing...that's rich. I'd go bonobo if I were doing great ape role playing.
The question is, of course, facetious. Probably better the dude is exorcising demons here rather than letting things build in his twisted mind. Well, I HOPE the dude is exorcising his demons...
Ah, the life of a twisted lil cruller...
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10 years ago
LMN dude...save this for "The Joy of Sex...LMN Style!"
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10 years ago
Well duh. The NSA monitors everything. But they're still trying to figure out if the Juicebots are a terror cell using a really strange code or just one bored (or is that "board") dude saying a bunch of crazy shit.
Hell, I'm not sure either.
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10 years ago
Who knew Juice was a bank executive? Wait...can't be Juice. If brother Juice were a bank exec they'd catch him jackin' it in the vault after the customers complained the the money was "all sticky an' shit".
Juice! Juice! Juice!
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10 years ago
Hmmmm... I was of the opinion that Gin was a Juicebot. But this was some mighty fine writing. Gin if you're real, take care of yourself and don't do any more private parties. And if you're actually Juice...bravo...well played.
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10 years ago
Sad news. The clearly need to get the whole Scooby gang looking. Hell, ask Scrappy as well. That lil pup was obnoxious but I'm sure he'd pitch in and help find the voice of Shaggy!
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10 years ago
This is a daring tactic...ol' LMN attacks alabegonz. Well, alabegonz may not be a super-rich stud who consumes tequila by the barrel, snorts blow directly out of mules' rectums, and makes it rain Benjamins in dive clubs. I know that you've got that gig LMN my man. alabegonz is doing a different thing here. I say live and let live my man.
Unless I gives you some groovy LARFS.
Don't take it too seriously alabegonz. Ol' LMN just feels compelled to say all of this groovy stuff 'cos his real life largely centers on making sure the French fries at his work are properly salted. Sometimes Mr. McGee lets him mix up the special sauce for the burgers. FYI, ol' LMN sent me a PM bragging that the special sauce is 1000 island and catsup with a dash of relish. Groove on LMN, groove on!!!
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10 years ago
And I'm sure the Russian hookers or Chinese KTV girls make it worth maintaining additional homes.
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10 years ago
I would think a dude like LMN would maintain several pied-a-terres. Perhaps your secondary home in the Miami area and additional apartments in New York, London, Moscow, Geneva, Paris, and Hong Kong (or have you moved inland to Shenzen?). You never know when a quick vacation is in order.
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10 years ago
I should clarify for the sake ofLMN, since that dude lives on the edge. The +/- 3 years should only be used to justify finding girls that are 18+. So don't try anything questionable, LMN my brother.
Except the questionable shit you pull most days. Like going home from your job makin' the onion rings and French fries and the trolling TUSCL as a rich stud, per se!
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10 years ago
Well...LMN has the whole "I went to an exclusive boarding school but the only thing I learned was how to fly abroad with my personal supply of heroin in my rectum" whereas Rick has a much more gritty and realistic take on the rich stud character.
But the big question is whether LMN will have staying power. Only so many morning you can wake up with blood-stained sheets asking yourself "was that a nosebleed or did I cut the hooker?" But I know this dude....goes by XYYZ...that out rich-studs 'me both. That dude lives life OFF DA HOOK!
XYYZ is so much a member of the jet set that he never gets off the plane! Just hires strippers to hang with him in first class. If you ever get on a flight and set in first class and a stripper-lookin' chick sits down with this dude that looks like the crypt keeper and old crypt keeper pulls a heroin bag out of her asshole in full view of the entire cabin, that is XYYZ. If he then face fucks her during turbulence while the pilot lights the seatbelt sign...well, my friends, this is MOTHAFUCKIN' XYYZ!!!
LMN is just three letters in the middle of the alphabet.
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10 years ago
Well, you could impose some sort of error on this, to allow users of "the mathematical system" to use the services of those that aren't *exactly* half their age +7 years.
For example, an 18 year old would be unable to find his perfectly aged companion in a juice bar using the standard system. But add in a +/- 3 year fudge factor and all is ok.
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10 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
Dump the chick Rick. You need to find yourself a pornstar to hang out with!
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10 years ago
Rick-dude...are you the genius behind LMN? That was a very LMNesque answer right there.
I still think the LMN character would read better with some specific quirks, like excessive and inappropriate use of "per se", but you guide your character however you want him to develop.
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10 years ago
This is some mighty fine creative writing. It does get a bit close to self-pity near then end, so it doesn't quite capture the full LMN attitude. But pretty fucking good my friend.
But no way this dude is a product of Choat. I say Deerfield. Get the details right my friend!