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15 years ago
So, am I the only guy that likes to give his girl the classic "pearl necklace" ??
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15 years ago
Nah, man, you all got it wrong. The patron Saint of strippers is Gene Simmons. 'Nuff said.
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15 years ago
Guys:
Yes, the chances of infection of HIV is slim if you do not have open sores on your Johnson. Trust me on this one, though: genital warts are EASY to spread, impossible to cure and Hell on comfort and quality of life.
I do NOT have them. Because, as my Dead Uncle Jack told me years ago: "No glove, no love."
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15 years ago
Favorite things for her NOT to do:
1) "I won't spit."
2) "I won't complain if you cum on my face/in my hair/on my tits, etc."
3) "I won't lay any stripper whiny-ass BS on you."
4) "I won't try to keep you to myself"
5) "I won't stop."
Just a beginning. I left a lot of good ones out there, if anyone wants to add.
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15 years ago
So, potheadpl is a dental assistant. Who knew?
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15 years ago
Dougster: I will soon be changing my screen name to TrueDope. Or, maybe, GreenVegasIsATrueDope
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15 years ago
I don't know about you guys, but the girl that is doing me is solely because I am so (insert stripper BS adjective here, e.g., sexy, handsome, charming, hung). It is obvious to me that my wit, charm and pocketbook has made her all mine, and no one else's.
Clubs are about the fantasy, right? Mine are just a tad more unrealistic than you guys....
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15 years ago
I like to sit ringside, stick a twenty to my forehead and yell: "Hey, darlin'! What say y'all cum to VIP with me??? And I don't mean C-O-M-E, neither!" Then I laugh like the Hillbilly goober that I am and hope for the best.
Then I quietly slip out and try the next joint.....
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15 years ago
Clubber: I wondered if this was the latest incarnation of greenvegas, but the post made too much sense, so I figured it had to be someone else. However, if this guy starts bragging about my ATF, also known as Mrs. GreenVegas, then we will know it is him.
Hope it is, in a weird way. Then I can add yet another name to the ignore list.
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15 years ago
Whenever I find one that I can nickname "Snapper," I seem to pick up a new ATF
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15 years ago
My all-time favorite testimony (not my case, it was a hearing going on as I was waiting for my client's case to be called):
Assistant Prosecutor (uptight bitch, ballbuster type): "And did you step-Dad do something to you that made you uncomfortable?"
Witness (maybe 14, seriously under-educated hillbilly type with a slow drawl): "Yu-uh-uh-up..."
APA: "And what was that?"
Witness: "Bu-uh-uht Fu-uh-uhk....."
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15 years ago
"Give me ambiguity, or give me something else."
Not quite Patrick Henry, but it appeals to the old English teacher in me.
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15 years ago
"Shorty," he confessed sadly.
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15 years ago
Will post erotic Blogs for World Series Tickets.
I am an unattractive middle-aged troll, but I write like a mothe.....(I'm just talkin' 'bout Shaft, Steve)
Any takers?
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15 years ago
mitciv is on my ignore list,too. just like greenvegas, notgreenvegas, reallyreallyIswearIamnotgreenvegas, pleaselistentomegreenvegas. Mrs. GreenVegas, however, is my new ATF.
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15 years ago
Then DoctorDarby also is familiar with my favorite Lincoln quote: "Fuck, it don't matter." Gotta love ol' Honest Abe.
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15 years ago
Dougster: I think blowjobs are "performance" art. Support The Arts !!!!
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15 years ago
My favorite dancer likes to play "stuff the cavity" for Thanksgiving. I do the best I can.....
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15 years ago
See my reviews. I went to a club last Halloween, and they mostly all wore costumes. I have seen that phenomenon at several of the smaller clubs.
It actually is a good time.
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15 years ago
Not strange due to content, but years ago when it was big, one dancer used to try and shake it to "We Are the World."
Much too long.
Much too much.
Weird.
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15 years ago
Went to Memphis to try and find, and then interview, a reluctant witness. It was Palm Sunday, several years ago. Struck out on the witness, but figured since I was in Memphis, I should see if clubs were open. They were, and they were busy. I got several up-close and personal dances, including one from a trashy, tiny white spinner. No tits, tight ass, a waist about 20 inches and long dishwater blond hair. She wore too much makeup and smoked like a chimney. She also gave covered FS in VIP when it appeared that the norm was HJ at most. She fucked like a banshee and scratched the shit out of me in the process. The next weekend I went to a family reunion for Easter. In northern Louisiana. She was there. She was the now-adult daughter of one of my first cousins. Imagine. I do NOT know how the family reacted, cuz I didn't tell a soul. Until now.
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15 years ago
"Pregnant" means lots of different things. There are methods to fucking pregnant women.
For the first 4 months, usually, you can do it most any way.
For the next 2-3 months, you normally are restricted to doggy style.
For the last, you normally have to do it Coyote style. That is where you lay by the hole and howl.
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15 years ago
The scariest thing i don't remember is when I got drunked up, took by svelte 280, with hairy back and shoulders, up on stage on a Male Amateur night, and shook the mighty banana hammock.
Those that didn't pull an Oedipus voted me the winner.
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15 years ago
I love Super Bowl parties. Many girlfriends get ignored, so they drink too much and lose their inhibitions. I am always friendly and attentive. I make sure their glass of wine is refilled and that they get to eat something more sophisticated than chips and dip by whipping up something in the kitchen of whoever is hosting the party. I have a scorecard of about a 1 to 3 ratio of getting a solid blowjob in one of the empty rooms from a girl that came with someone else. I LOVE football.
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15 years ago
I am still not so sure that fucking farm animals is perverted. Still thinking, gatorfan, and I will get back to you. At least you don't have to buy them breakfast, and their car never breaks down....