discussion comment
16 years ago
1.Yes, privacy, no roaming gestapo to intimidate you.
2. Willingness to have fun in different areas inside the club. For example, maybe I want to "play" at the bar. Maybe a VIP. Depends on my mood and how it's handled. Willingness and settings to accommodate this make for a great club.
3. Knowing you don't have to search or waste money to find good results.
4. Value.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Another anecdote: a dancer I've known since she started--I believe I bought one of her firt dances ssome 10 years ago-- always gives me back some money if she thinks I've given her too much. I asked her why she does this and she says its a "friend thing."
discussion comment
16 years ago
I like to have a contest with dancers who know me. Sometimes I tell the I'm going to "win". Other times I let them "win". And when I win, e.g. do not finish, I always say, "now think about that and the potential benefits to you." It always gets and interesting response. I'll leave it at that.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I always go alone except for a rare occasion when it's a business get together.Never had a problem
...except for one time--I was robbed at gun point. My fault, I shouldn't have been where I was at that hour and been so careless about parking in the back instead of the front. Live and learn. It's not so much being alone as it is being smart about it.
Agree with SuperDude. Dancers and customers are always watching for guys who pull out big rolls or count a fistful of cash. Go to the Men's room.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Let's review:
Making fun relationships. Good!
Looking for love in all the wrong places. Not good!
So...
Chill out. Have fun. Escape one day at a time. Sooner or later you'll discover reality. Just be realistic along th3e way.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Jester's right. When their well runs dry, they move on to another one. But if you're a real clubber, you shouldn't have trouble finding where she is. Networking works in this industry like any other, whether you're the customer or the dancer.
discussion comment
16 years ago
You'll find two knds of people (honest and not) everywhere, in every industry. Even the SC businesss. So don't be surprised. Just make it a practice to find out which type you're dealing with. And--reward the good behavior with some repeat business of your own.
discussion comment
16 years ago
For what it's worth, in the theme of this post---
One of my former ATFs who became a personal friend (and who has since left this earth) always told me she danced for herself. Now maybe this answer isn't the right one for every dancer or every customer. But my friend always selected her own music so she could set the context for a good time. But while admitedly dancing to please herself, she know what she was doing, knew where she was and always managed to do the most important things:
--she carried herself as the sexiest dancer in the club,
--she always had a natural come-fuck-me look on stage,
--she looked you in the eye and flirted with you if you sat at the stage,
--she told you with her moves that she wasn't a prud and would show you a good time later,
--she was always professional and athletic about her stage moves,
--she always danced her best no matter what her "real" mood,
--because of the above she was always the one with the most customers teed up for her private lap dances VIPs,
--and even though she was a "star" so-to-speak, she didn't let it get to her head, she always put the customer first.
discussion comment
16 years ago
All good comments. But basically, the stage dance is window shoping, nothing more. As so many say, it really is the "interview" that tells you what you need to know about whether you and this dancer can get on the same page and whether you are comfortable with her. Beyond that, sometimesw you just have to make an investment for research purposes if this is someone new.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Shadowcat is right, the real issue pertains to whether or not you have developed a good relationship with a dancer. In that case, it's a trust thing and you shouldn't be blasting her name alongside the intimate details of your relationship. With names withheld, that's another story. If names are given, you should pull the punch in certain details. It's all about protection and trust and understanding the cultural/political environment surrounding the club.
About our phraseology--in the long run it probably reads better. Without this creativity, it would be tiring after a while. Now, say goodnight Mr. Happy.
discussion comment
16 years ago
The absence of your commentary was noticable and did give some pause. So welcome back. As far as AA goes, I suppose it's in the eye of the beholder. I know I can quit drinking anytime, it's striip clubs I would have trouble letting go of! But I have a friend who is an alcoholic who has been sober for 15 years who is also a big believer in AA. In confidence he mentioned some common, successful business acquaintances who also attend AA meetings--and supposedly it has kept them sober, focused and productive. Personalaly, I don't know if I could go for the stand-up-and-spill-it-out-for-an-audience-formula. So I emphathize with your dilemma. Do what you think works best for you. Stay sober, stay focused, but don't give up the fun. They can still co-exist.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Imnumnutz, it just goes to prove that there's no limit to where a Bobcat J-school grad can go. Eat your heart out Matt Lauer.
discussion comment
16 years ago
wghlost--
You summed things up with the words "I noticed that she is not interested in me as much as I do for her." You have to be smart about these things. She's using you and you are using her. (That's not a negative or being judgmental, it's just the facts.) Don't get carried away with these things, it can get a little messy otherwise. It's OK to have fund and be friends just don't get obsessed. If and when things get more real, you'll know because you won't be asking these questions.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I've seen this happening more and more lately, although at my favorite club cell phonesd aen't permitted to be carried by dancers, tey all find a way to sneak them in. Personally, I think it is rude, selfish and inconsiderate (did I miss anything?) for a dancer to do this. I haven't pushed one away yet or walked out, but I do remember who did it and whether they apologied or seemed to not care. The smart ones don't do it. It's the ones who aren't focused on their jobs who make the rude interuption. In the total scheme of things, we shouldn't be too surprised, should we? In most cases, the calls relatd to kids, so if that's their focus, it can't be all bad, just not called for at the time. And just to make things current, it happened to me just this afternoon. It's someone who I'm just getting to know so I'm cutting her some slack to see if she improves her behavior. We'll see.
discussion comment
16 years ago
It can cut both ways as others have said above, but IMHO, yews, it is an industry skill to notice and remember things and customers. Some of the more succewsful dancers I know would succeed in marketing and sales in the real world, many just don't give themselves enough credit for having that in them.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Yes, it's worth the drive to Canada to escape the lameness of some Ohio clubs. But--Toronto no, Niagara Falls, yes. Windsor, no. ust check the TUSCL reviews.
But if you're so upset with Ohio lameness, you're just looking in the wrong places or not working hard enough to find/create your own fun. The fun is out there, you just have to find it and invest in it. In other words, don't be a stranger anywhere and expect great things to happen, unless you're in Detroit, Florida or Las Vegas.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Apparently you already did! But if you're looking for an intervention a la AA to keep you from getting off the wagon so-to-speak, better look someplace else. Most of us can't quit!
discussion comment
16 years ago
You're part of her marketing mix campaign. Most smarter dancers collect phone numbers of guys who they know like to buy dancers from them and spend time with them in the club. To generate their own cash flow and bar traffic, these dancers will start dialing their phone book the day before or the morning they come into work to encourage their "friends" to stop in. And they'll keep dialing during the day to get customers out, depending on how busy it is. It's one of the oldest and most effective personal dancer marketing strategies in the SC business. Don't let it get to your head.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Cougar, your're right. Some of my day shift favs have also not been able to pay tip out or have seen their triple digit take home drop to doubvle digit and less sometimes. It's as if some are showing up just to get out of the house.
Another sign, girls buying their own drinks (At least more than usual.)
discussion comment
16 years ago
Some day shifts are so boring due to so few customers the girls are all smoking way more weed etc. than they used to for escape.
discussion comment
16 years ago
From my conversations, I would say that most don't like it, but they do like the opportunity it gives them to make good money on a cash basis. And when I say opportuity, I'm talking about those that would have trouble qualifying for decent paying jobs. When you're in the "not-qualified" category, the SC industry appears very welcoming. Again, from my conversation, there is another small percentage that the bar/club industry atmopsphere and lifestyle. But the simple answer is that most would probably choose something else if it was available.
discussion comment
16 years ago
The strip club industry is the most obvious candidate for a bailout. It's time we all get a get a NEW DEAL. My proposals:
1. Subside 50% of the cost of every lap dance and VIP dance. Do this through creation of a Lapdance Commission that will issue vouchers. With subsidized lapdances, more people will be flocking to the cities and suburbs that are home to strip clubs. With this new spending power activated, the multiplier effect for businesses that are passed in-route to and from the clubs will naturally increase--another stimulus with positive tax consequences.
2. To implement the subsized lapdances, every household in the country will be entitled to at least one or or more lap dance vouchers, depending on the outcome of a census of households to determine each home's "horny factor." The higher the number, the more vouchers the household would qualify for. This census will be administered by the Commission. This, of course, will require the addition of hundreds of bureaucrats. I propose this workforce come from the ranks of retired and out of work srippers.
3. Subsidize the buffets offered at clubs. This will encourage more attendance and corresponding consumption of beverages to wash down the chow, thus increasing revenue from local sin taxes.
4. Offer tax breaks to women who attend strip clubs as patrons. Double the tax break if they dance on amateur might. Triple the tax break if they make a public display of lewdness or any similar act.
5. Offer free therapy to any right wing zealots who are offended by strip clubs. If the therapy doesn't work--deport them.
Now that would be real government in action. Change I could believe in.
discussion comment
15 years ago
Knew a midwest dancer who was a frequent Penthouse model. Once she was the monthly feature. She was wined and dined across the country by the publishers and by her photographer because she was a porno model. She used to maintain a website where you could see and buy her pictures.
I appeared to me that the Penthouse publishers used her to entertain advertisers or potential advertisers. This was never directly acknowle4dged, but I figured that out by the way she described her travels: in New York a lot, going to exotic locations a lot. She did acknowlege a lot of NY promotion parties organized by her photographer, however. Here's the interesting part, she had boundaries. I would pay to take her out to a motel for some heavy one-on-one sessions (no bondage before anyone makes that leap!) but no real sex. She drew the line there. I stopped taking her out because i figured I was overpaying for an experience that didn't match up with other things I could get for similar or less money. But she was interesting and fun. Although she had this set of huge bolt-ons which are just not my thing.
She did bondgage movies. The bondage was all fake but it was made to look very real. I thnk the fact that she also did these bondage porno videos also made her a valuable attraction for potential advertissers in the publishing world. Haven't seen her lately. Her name is Tyler.
discussion comment
15 years ago
Went to a seminar many years ago.
The leader was a prof form U of Georgia. His mantra:
"Everybody wants to be conned!"
I suppose he meant everybody wants to be stroked.
discussion comment
15 years ago
Most out of character dancer gift:
For one particular dancer I gave her a cookbook for her husband and a handbook on writing for her. She's one who will not be in the industry very long.