Going to strip clubs 'alone' . .

avatar for primemover
primemover
Florida
Is there really anything dangerous about this? Reading on zbones site in his faq there is a mention of muggings happening in the bathrooms and to not go alone.

So do many of you guys go alone, and if so, is there any real danger in this?

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avatar for minnow
minnow
16 years ago
Really no more so than conventional nightclubs, or even business hotels. In all my years of travel, and stripclubbing( hasn't happened while I've been there), 2 hotels where I've stayed have had murders, 2 more had shots fired at hotel with bullet damage, and 1 coworker witnessed an armed robbery. In stripclubs I've been to, there's been 1 shooting (dancer wounded by boyfriend) that I'm aware of.
avatar for samsung1
samsung1
16 years ago
I have gone to strip clubs hundreds of times alone. I have noticed some girls like guys who come alone but most girls prefer you when you are in a group. I have never felt nervous at all although now that you mentioned the muggings I am a bit apprehensive.

You might also want to consider what type of club it is and what kind of neighbor it is around. Is it a neighbor jack joint? or is it an upscale club? I have been to both and never felt nervous.
avatar for Dudester
Dudester
16 years ago
I have always gone alone. I've never had trouble. Being in the Marines I learned to walk with my head up, and to walk with a purpose. I also learned "the look". It's the kind of look John Wayne gave that said "you're flirting with death".

If you look like a target, you will be. It also helps to cruise the parking lot, and of course, to avoid neighborhoods where there's a Police Helicopter circling overhead, a SWAT truck on the corner, and reporters in flak jackets.
avatar for Officer
Officer
16 years ago
never had any problems, and I usually go alone
avatar for dale38
dale38
16 years ago
I never had a problem over many years. However, I would be alert and cautious on the way in. A potential thief knows that's when you are likely to have a wad of cash.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
16 years ago
I prefer to go alone. Some of my fave clubs are in questionable neighborhoods. I prefer days, but occasionally go at night. I've never had any problems.
And I'm a girl.
A TOUGH girl. ;)
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
16 years ago
Dudester is correct. I've never had a problem. His mention of how one walks and "the look" are of so true. In my working years, I spent many an hour in banks and other relatively higher security areas. If I walked as though I knew where I was going and that I "belonged", I wouldn't get questioned. Hesitate, and most always there was a "May I help you sir?".

avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
16 years ago
I have never had any problems either. There have been a couple of times that I did not feel secure and left after only one drink and no dances. I used to always go alone. I felt that another guy would just get in my way while trying for lap dances.

No more. It is a rare event now, if I go alone. I always have fun with the TUSCLers that I have met. I introduce them to dancers that I know and they introduce me to dancers that they know. In between we can BS about them.

Tomorrow I head for a 3 day/2 night trip to my favorite club. I got a call this afternoon from one of my favorite dancers. Another TUSCLer was asking her about me. I will meet him tomorrow and rob0411 is going to meet up with me on Wednesday. I look fore ward to it.
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
16 years ago
The look? For those playing along at home, just try and stay around your comfort zone. When in doubt, walk away.
avatar for robofan
robofan
16 years ago
Ninety Nine percent of the time I go to strip clubs it is alone. I have been doing it for years and have been to clubs all over the country. Never once have I had a problem or even felt threatened at all. Never heard of anyone being mugged at a strip club either. Most clubs maintain some form of security. Bouncers, managers, armed bartenders or something. Keep in mind that they are primarily a cash business so for their own sakes they maintain tight security. If the clubs you are going to do not have good security find a better class of strip club.

avatar for chitownlawyer
chitownlawyer
16 years ago
I don't think I've ever gone to a strip club with anyone, although I've sometimes met up with friends at the club. I have only witnessed three physical fights in strip clubs, and two were between/among the dancers. The other, at Brad's BF in Indy, was handled very professionally by management (off-duty cop cold-cocked a guy in a wheelchair over a pool table), and was really over almost as soon as it started.

I have certainly witnessed a lot more fights in "straight" bars than in strip clubs, and I have never felt in personal danger, although I have gone to clubs in some sketchy places.
avatar for mreef
mreef
16 years ago
During the day, and even early weeknights, I see most customers come in alone.

I only see groups late on weeknights and on weekends.

I wouldn't go alone if I felt unsafe, when you are with someone else, it becomes more of a social visit. I prefer to get off, blow my wad (or else just my cash) and leave. I usually don't have the luxury of time on my side to spend hours in the club.
avatar for primemover
primemover
16 years ago
Sounds like what I read on that sites FAQ was blown out of proportion(or at least I blew it out of proportion), so that's good to hear :D
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
16 years ago
I've gone to strip clubs by myself at least 90% of the time and I've never felt unsafe. I have witnessed stuff, including one particularly nasty fight (which might be one reason why girls should never go to clubs, but that's an argument for another day), but never felt threatened. As long as you don't do anything stupid, you are fine
avatar for CarolinaWanderer
CarolinaWanderer
16 years ago
I always go alone and frequent some real dives from time to time. If there are "gangsta's" hanging outside the club, I pass. Most "shady" clubs have metal detecting wands or pat you down on the way in, which discourages guns and knifes. The "nicer" clubs don't check (but probably should). In all this time I have never been hasseled in or outside of a club. I don't club in California which is Zbone's territory, so I cannot say if it is a problem there.
avatar for how
how
16 years ago
Another empirical example of going alone and feeling safe/secure.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
16 years ago
CarolinaWanderer,

When you said, "Most "shady" clubs have metal detecting wands or pat you down on the way in, which discourages guns and knifes.", made me wonder how many here DO carry a knife or gun. I've never even been subjected to a pat down or a wand. I have been to a few, what I would consider "shady" clubs.
avatar for uscue13
uscue13
16 years ago
95% of the time I go alone. Never feel unsafe. Of course, the clubs I go to aren't in sketchy neighborhoods either. I wouldn't say the risk is any higher than going anywhere else alone at night.
avatar for cems
cems
16 years ago
Agree with others, no reason to feel unsafe at most strip clubs. Any club, bar or store that is located in a ghetto is gonna be unsafe regardless of it being a strip club.

The biggest thing you have to worry about at a strip club is a hot babe seducing all your money away.
avatar for 59
59
16 years ago
Metal detectors and pat downs are pretty standard at the clubs in Philly. Even the most "upscale" of clubs. Some are in somewhat shady neighborhoods, some in like industrial parks where no one lives.

Philly is the only place I can recall with this practice. Been to clubs in shadier neighborhoods in other states and no metal detectors, etc.
avatar for samsung1
samsung1
16 years ago
the problem with metal detectors is that...."sure you feel safe on the inside, but what about when you get outside???...the people out there know you don't have a gun/knife to protect yourself"
avatar for snowtime
snowtime
16 years ago
I have been going to clubs for years almost always alone. If it is a new venue I will scope out the surrounding area. On a very few occassions I have passed because of safety concerns, but my curiosity usually led me inside. The only real fight I witnessed was a major 5 minute brawl in the world famous Mons Venus many years ago. If you were going to pick one club that would be safe because of the numbers, the Mons would be it, so go figure. As others have said there is always a risk of trouble, but probably no more so than any other nightspots. As I get older I find myself making more daytime visits which are probably safer thsn nights. And of course the information on TUSCL is wonderful for helping you avoid clubs in bad neighborhoods. Unfortunately most of us did not have this info available in the past. Thanks again to Founder for providing such a valuable resource.
avatar for curiousgeorgefun
curiousgeorgefun
16 years ago
alone in a regular bar where guys are flexing their testosterone to compete for the girls is more 'dangerous'. in a SC I don't think that there is that competition that usually is in regular bars.

sit with your back to the wall, and be observant and confident.

Snowtime, I bet the fight you saw at Mons Venus was when it was packed. I went there twice. the first time it was nice, the second time you couldn't find a chair or even a place to stand barely. I didnt' get a good vibe because there were to many young dudes there drinking way to much bumping into eachother. I left
avatar for CarolinaWanderer
CarolinaWanderer
16 years ago
Clubber, I do not carry a gun but have a pocket knife with a 2" blade that would be useless in a fight, but is great for opening packages or mail. There are 3 VHM clubs I frequent that wand or frisk. Two are in NC one in SC. Two are primarily black clubs one not. Two have had "incidents" that led to increased precausions. My experience has been that clubs that wand or frisk tend to be more fun.
avatar for snowtime
snowtime
16 years ago
Curiousgeorgefun, yes it was packed and was 15 or more years ago when they had a BYOB policy. I haven't been back recently, but seem to recall they do not permit alcohol at all now. If that is the case it is probably less likely to induce roudy behavior by the younger crowd.
avatar for casualguy
casualguy
16 years ago
I've been going alone for years. In one city, I did have a problem with Korean massage parlor girls forcefully grabbing me and pulling me into their club. Then they fondled my package and wanted me to buy them an expensive drink. In another shady area, I was approached by prostitutes a couple of times as I returned to my car after leaving the club. If the club doesn't look like one I'm comfortable with, I don't want to visit. Most people don't bother me in the first place though. I did have a girl give me a drive by flashing as I left another strip club.

Several times early on in my clubbing years, I was leaving with a dancer and going to other places with her after she got off from work. I did that with a couple of other dancers too. I didn't have any guys to stop me.

The one thing I sometimes get tired of is if you're sitting down at a table alone in a club, sometimes you seem to be a dancer magnet and it's difficult just to sit and watch the dancers on stage. That's not always bad but sometimes I wish I had company to deflect some of the dancers coming at me.
avatar for casualguy
casualguy
16 years ago
The advantage to company is that they can save your table when you leave for the restroom or get lap dances besides the conversation.
avatar for jester214
jester214
16 years ago
Strip clubs are like anywhere else in this world, if you watch yourself and don't do anything stupid your chance of having a problem (of the type being talked about) is very low.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
16 years ago
Never pull your money out to count it. If you think your're running low, use a bathroom stall to check your wallet. Accept the overpriced mandatory valet parking as a safety feature. (Think about walking through a dark and unpatrolled parking lot.)
Never give out personal information about where you live or the kind of car you drive. Stripper boyfriends use this information for a hit. A well lit upscale club is usually a safe bet for solo visit.
avatar for gk
gk
16 years ago
I always go alone except for a rare occasion when it's a business get together.Never had a problem
...except for one time--I was robbed at gun point. My fault, I shouldn't have been where I was at that hour and been so careless about parking in the back instead of the front. Live and learn. It's not so much being alone as it is being smart about it.

Agree with SuperDude. Dancers and customers are always watching for guys who pull out big rolls or count a fistful of cash. Go to the Men's room.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
16 years ago
Never occurred to me that going alone wasn't the norm. That's all I've ever done, except the rare (annoying) occasions when a bunch of friends who DON'T usually go to a strip club somehow end up at one with me, usually because of the rare (annoying) bachelor party.

Was alone not the usual way to attend?
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
16 years ago
BG,

I agree. I've most always gone alone. I'm seen people in clubs that I know. A couple of us used to visit clubs after work sometimes, and done a couple "spur of the moment" visits with others. But again, like you, I thought alone was the norm.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
16 years ago
Alone might be normal amongst people on this board, but in the world at large, not so much. I've seen people I know as well, but they are with someone, generally speaking. On the other hand, the one big strip club goer I know from work generally goes alone.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
16 years ago
I'm single and a recognized "alternative thinker" among my friends, so if I'm caught alone by their group in a strip club, I have less to be embarrassed about than most of them do. If a married friend, or one who is all staunchly family-values, or a group who go to church together, were to run into me at a strip club, I'd just be able to say to most of them, "What a bunch of hypocrites you are," whereas all that some of them would have to say to me would be, "Umm, it's a bachelor party, honest, that's the ONLY reason we'd come to a place like this." (There are also some other dudes I know, who aren't hypocritical at all, and so there'd be little aggro in either direction.)

I especially like it when I encounter one of the hypocrites alone. Me: alone and comfortable being there and comfortable with him knowing that I'm there. Him: alone and uncomfortable being there and even MORE uncomfortable with me knowing that he's there. Result: I have the advantage. :)
avatar for poleshadow
poleshadow
16 years ago
Since I tend to go to clubs on the day shift I have less of a problem going alone. But I used to venture out by myself in my early 20s at night and never had a problem with that, either.
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