discussion comment
9 years ago
Let's do a three way with her. You fuck her in the ass while she licks my cloaca until I cum in her mouth. I'll also slap her titties around with my wings. That's the ticket! Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
Shut it captain dirtyass. You're already on the list for a visit from a certain lion. Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
Which one of you idiots hacked rickdugan's account? The council of ricks is looking into this and when we discover the culprit said culprit is going to get a visit from a certain lion. A lion wearing a suit and carrying an AK.
Then it's time for said culprit to be yummy yummy yummy in my tummy tummy tummy. After the lion ears his share, of course!
Roar...cough...cough...squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
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ricktheturtleAn African turtle, originally from Zanzibar, heading straight for the white women...
Tiredtraveler, Big Mo would probably be happy with a threesome. He's been hanging out with my gay bud fredthevulture. However, you'd actually be having sex like a female hairless ape. But doing it turtlestyle. While licking a gay vulture's cloaca.
I'll tell Big Mo and Fred you're game for a three way. Just look for a vulture and turtle on your porch, both wearing bowling shirts and dockers.
Personally I'm not sure why you want a turtle dick up your ass, but to each his own!
Squawk!
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9 years ago
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GACAUn-retired: Met my ATF. Married her. Divorcing her.
And I am actually a vulture. Do you know how hard it is for me to type? And iPhone voice recognition sucks. It is almost as though you don't want me to share rickish wisdom.
Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
You think some inbred hairless apes from the American south scare my lion bud? He's a lion that wears a suit and carries an AK. The tables would be turned on the Deliverance morons. But neither of us would fuck male hairless apes.
That said we might encourage our bud ricktheturtle to bring along his gay bud, mauricetheturtle. We'll how those hicks like turtle dick up their asses.
Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
Do you like vulture jizz krystal123456789? If you haven't tried it I'll fly down and give you a taste.
Squawk!
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9 years ago
Many female hairless ape strippers also enjoy licking the vulture cloaca. I give it to them whenever I can. That's the ticket!
Squawk!
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9 years ago
Yes, you should be considerate. Squawk!
When I sit with the girl I'm giving her the privilege of sitting with a Rick. How that for consideration?
The rest of you should tip.
Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
@4got2wipe, stop pretending to be some happy-go-lucky man child and then trolling Rick. You're being an asshole and you should be smart enough to know that. Admittedly Chili Palmer and DoctorPhil are more responsible for derailing this thread, but you were a serious dumbass for responding. No good could come of that if you actually enjoy Rick's threads as you claim.
And if you were trying to derail Rick's thread, you were a lying hypocrite. So what is it - lying hypocrite or dumbass?
Beep...beep...message from George Soros ends...beep
Wait, what happened? I need to go put my vulture-sized tin foil cap back on. I think George Soros just mind-controlled me. That's the ticket! Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
@Chili Palmer, you're almost as much of a dumbass as DoctorPhil. Why the fuck did you try to call out that 4got2wipe retard on a thread where he actually had a point? Admittedly, he was being over the top in his condemnation of Rick because he apparently likes to troll Rick. But maybe you should save the invective for a thread where he's actually being a complete retard. There are enough of them.
Is it so you can show your "superior" knowledge of figuring out how to pay whores for sex? Real accomplishment there Einstein. You strike me as an idiot who dropped out of college after two years because underwater basket weaving was too intellectually challenging. You're worse than either DoctorPhil or 4got2wipe. They sort of seem to recognize that they're being assholes. You are an asshole but you seem unaware of that fact. SMH!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
I'm going to break the fourth wall for this post, because it'll be funny to do so.
@DoctorPhil, you do realize that your having an Internet shouting match with somebody pretending to be a vulture, don't you? Scratch that. Of course you don't. If you'd realized that you wouldn't have let loose with the bizarre Soros rant. I'm making you dance like a little monkey and laughing my ass off.
Now I'll say something that even someone as stupid as you will understand:
Beep...beep...you took off your tin foil hat so now your mine...beep...this is George Soros...beep...beep...I want you to take your gun...beep...now go stand in a dumpster...beep...beep...put the gun in your mouth after making sure it's loaded...beep...now pull the trigger...beep...message from Soros ends...beep...beep!
Try to make sure you have the dumpster cover in a position where it'll fall shut when you die. I wouldn't want a vulture to find you and get a tummy ache.
discussion comment
9 years ago
You should write about vultures. I could give you insights into the complex life of a high ranking genius vulture that likes to have hot and steamy sex with female hairless apes and kicks the asses of those who insult the honor of those named rick. Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
Not a Doctor Phil, shut your loser mouth or my lion bud will kick your ass. But I won't eat you because I'm sure you must have some sort of transmissible spongiform encephalopathy to be so fucking stupid.
Plus I suspect you'd taste rank even if you didn't have a diseased brain. The kind of rank that would require more than a soupçon of aging in the sun.
Squawk!
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9 years ago
I have a Ph.D. in carrion studies from New World Vulture Polytechnic. Go fighting condors! Squawk!
It was very important for my career because I was responsible for safety inspections. I always told my buds "hey, we're vultures, but you never know what will hurt your tummy until you finish your carrion studies. Squawk!"
Now that my career is "be buds with future dictator of the world" my degree doesn't help much. Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
I'm betting that idiot Chili Palmer won't apologize for the grave sin of insulting a rick. In fact, I'm looking forward to it. My lion bud is going to give him the full wildebeest treatment.
Squawk!
Then, after a soupçon of aging in the sun he'll be yummy yummy yummy in my tummy tummy tummy!
Squawk!
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9 years ago
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rickduganVerified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
I clearly have a lot to report back to my lion buddy. How dare you people criticize the most intelligent hairless ape ever born. Who cares if rickdugan runs over some random hairless apes? It isn't like they're important. Just bunch of damn dirty apes!
I expect this sort of wildebeest shit from the usual suspects that are already on the wildebeest list, like twentyfive and the guy that doesn't wipe his ass. But I'm a bit shocked by the vitriol from Chili Palmer. That mornon has one chance to apologize immediately and unconditionally or I'm going to tell my lion bud. Roar...cough...cough...squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
If something like this happened to me I'd let out a mighty squawk and my lion bud would come to help. Nobody fucks with a lion that wears a suit and carries an AK.
My advice to be that loser: find a lion bud. Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
George No Dick, you have an ironic name given that you ack like a gigantic dick. But since you assure the rest of us that you're dickless I'll assume your actually just a giant douche. I've talked to my lion bud about you and soon you'll be something else. Something that rhymes with schmildebeest. Roar...cough...squawk!
I'm still trying to learn a lion roar. I'll do better in the future. Squawk!
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9 years ago
Jack, I'll be flying up to your neck of the woods soon. When I do you'll see the girls changing their FB status to "with a sexy vulture licking his cloaca" Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
You need to relax Timex. Here's what I do when I'm feeling depressed. I take a nice cut of meat. Say an organic filet. Then I let it rot in the sun for about 3 days. Then I let it sit on the pavement, guarded by my buddy rickthepitbull, for about 20 minutes. That's sufficient for the meat to pick up a soupçon of asphalt.
Then it is yummy yummy yummy in my tummy tummy tummy and all is well with the world. Ask yourself what would be yummy yummy yummy to you Timex. That's the ticket to cure your ills! Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
I'll be wherever you want John Smith. Will your dream stripper come along? I bet she needs some vulture yoghurt in her mouth something fierce. Just ask her and I bet she'll say "vulture jizz is yummy yummy yummy in the tummy tummy tummy"
Regardless, you seem like a good egg John Smith. Your dream stripper spoke kindly of you when rickthelion and I were banging her. Let's be buds. That's the ticket!
Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
I like summer because rotting carrion really needs to age in the sun for a bit to get that gourmet yummy yummy yummy in the tummy tummy tummy flavor. That's the ticket!
But I don't like that the warm weather in the Northern hemisphere is so early this year. My lion bud says that you apes have ruined the planet with greenhouse gasses and that is why the cats have to take over. Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
I didn't realize that you were a female Phoenix. Are you also a hairless ape? If so your spawn will be born at a momentous time. Right after the glorious cat revolution. That's the ticket! Lucky juvenile hairless ape. Squawk!
discussion comment
9 years ago
It depends on what she smells like. But I'm all about the compliments when I run into a stripper that's been sleeping in her own sick. Kind of gives her the 3-day old rotting carrion smell. That's the ticket! Squawk!