Front Room
Okay, this rick feels a rickly duty to get you damn dirty apes back on track and to observe some voluntary compliance with a “don’t be an html dick” rule. Here’s a question: how worried are you if a female…
Front Room
The rick is skeptical about this story: https://www.phun.org/newspics/funny_friday_14/24620.jpg This rick’s experience is that even the stupidest of hairless ape whores understand that takin’ my lion jizz their hooha will not result in lil’ cubs with noble lion heads and ape bodies. Also,…
Front Room
Have any of you ever worried that Scrub Ape might be the chef when you go to a restaurant? I went to a restaurant with good reviews but when my dinner arrived it was rather unappetizing. I heard somebody in…
Front Room
So this hairless ape that raps under the name of “Future” pulled a rick trick on Pippen. Apparently, a young Future Ape wanted Pippen’s autograph. Pippen refused so a number of years later Future fucked Pippen’s wife while wearing Gucci…
Front Room
Get a load of this gem: https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/w30lr1/oc_cowboy_butts_make_him_nuts/ There is a lot to unpack here. The “Cowboy Butts Drive Me Nuts” bumper sticker is what convinced me it was Skifredo. But you should also check out the bumper sticker declaring that the driver…
Front Room
You know how there are times you’re reading TUSCL and somebody says something crazy and you’re all “yeah, right… like that happened” and you roll your eyes? There should be a button for that sentiment. Obviously, it wouldn’t apply to ricks…
Front Room
Not idiots like Skifredo. Nope, I’m talkin’ ‘bout the freaks that wield chainsaws and live in the sewer and shit like that. I was shocked to discover that Libby-ape or whatever the fuck his name is wants strippers to dress…
Front Room
So I was all rickin’ around enjoying myself when this sexy female hairless ape told me about this cartoon her father used to watch. It was called He-Man. Sounds kind of gay to this rick but whatev. Anyhoo, I decided…
Front Room
A: Sandy Johnson ROAR!!!
Front Room
Remember that plucky Gotham rat that was hauling away a whole slice of pizza or maybe it was a whole pie? Anyhoo, I was partying with this rat. You know, some lion and rat on sexy female hairless ape gangbang…
Front Room
Since I am King of the Jungle I respect all the various Kings, Queens, Princes, and whatnots. So I though I’d share a story about Queen Elizabeth II and her eldest son. The Queen and Prince Charles are traveling alone in…
Politics
Most of the political shit you damn dirty apes post is just plain stupid. Whine whine whine the world isn’t exactly the way I want it to be oh boo hoo woe is me. Here’s a hint, just listen to…
Front Room
rick my brother, there are some questionable hairless apes in your neck of the woods… https://www.phun.org/newspics/funny_friday_14/24048.jpg Do you think this is a TUSCL poster? I guess this is kind of funny… I find it hilarious when housecats shit just outside their litter…
Front Room
This rick knows the 411 on many TUSCL posters. I have it on good authority that Dixie-Ape (aka Cacaplop, the ape with anal leakage) befriended a retarded crab living behind a Starbucks. Said crab, named Fredo, is none other than…
Front Room
Hey you damn dirty apes, it is time you remember what TUSCL is for. Trading stories and information about strip clubs. Praising the ricks. Discussing the theory and practice of driving while intoxicated. Learning from the ricks. And generally making…
Front Room
I was rickin’ around in an alcoholic fog when I ran across what appears to be a porno appearance of that beagle from the comic strips. The one the rap guy is named after. Yeah, him…apparently he grew a really…
Front Room
It should surprise none of you damn dirty apes that we ricks are experts at wordplay. This rick thought he would share the best anagram - a rickagram, if you will.: Marisa Tomei = Itsa me Mario ROAR!!!
Front Room
Hear me out. Yes, he’s a hairless ape. More hairless than average. You’d think that this rick would hold him in contempt. But he’s an ape that is reaching for the stars. By blasting himself into space in a giant dick.…
Front Room
Some wacko ape shared a photo of my half-sister, rachaelthelioness, reacting to tales of yours truly fucking hairless ape whores. This is some fucked up shit https://www.reddit.com/r/CrazyFuckingVideos/comments/t8jdhq/what_do_you_think_happened_to_this_lion/ Now I’m tryin’ to track the asshole who told her this shit down so…
Front Room
This rick was pleasantly buzzed flipping through channels and I came across a find. An old program starring some weird looking bear. Bear didn’t even look real but I am a big supporter of television programming with more carnivores and…
Front Room
As a rick I can pull off all sorts of badassery even when I am so out of my skull from my drinking that the laws of physics only seem like suggestions. However, those of you who are more constrained…
Front Room
If you perverted apes are bothered by the change in the green M&M’s footwear - and you should be - sign this petition: https://www.change.org/p/keep-the-green-m-m-sexy You hairless apes KNOW the green M&M is a horny slut. Let’s keep her that way. ROAR!!!
Front Room
https://tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=76547#comment1191807 I shall educate you normies (i.e., non-ricks) regarding the ways of rick: Being rick is the only way of truly being. It is a holistic approach that blows the mind of normies with how unbelievably awesome we ricks truly are. You…
Front Room
We ricks have generally avoided TUSCL meetups because we don’t want to associated with normies (i.e., non-ricks). However, I’ve also been wanting to improve my rick fugue. That state I enter when I’m pleasantly drunk. The problem is getting sufficient alcohol…
Front Room
I’m counting myself out because I’m a rick and a lion. Obviously, I’d win. But among the rest of you, who’d win and why? Remember, guns are not allowed. Any asshole can win with a gun but it takes skill to…
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