discussion comment
12 years ago
Maybe we could get you to post a pic holding up a sign saying "Barbie123" and the date. Preferably with your tits out., o' course. 'Cos dat girl be hawt! I be droppin' in and tippin' big next time I be in Philly if she be real. O' course we know the probability o' dat shizzle...
discussion comment
12 years ago
Sharkhunterdude -- are you like Hawkeye? Bouncing arrows be coo-el shizzle. Tell me...what is it like to work with Tony Stark? Is Black Widow hot? I bet she is friggin' hawt!
discussion comment
12 years ago
What we've got here is failure to communicate. Some men you just can't reach. Is that the case with you Drac-a-roo?
You're not sure why I'm bustin' your chops and not grand1511's? Hmm...could it be because you are friggin' HILARIOUS? To my knowledge, grand-man doesn't have a super-secret Tricky Dick wit' a Cracker Jack decoder ring enemies list. He just ventured an opinion -- I was tryin' to hard...perhaps, but I was missin' da Juice-dude's insanity so I indulged. I'm cool with folks not diggin' any specific joke I make. His prerogative to express his opinion. Just like you are free to express yours. Am I advocatin' dat da DraC get band? I don't think so.
But dude, I know I don't HAVE to read you opinions. I want to. They are sometimes almost as funny as the J-man when he be riffin' on some KA-ray-ZEE-AZZ shizzle like shovin' cucumbers up a strippers ass while he face fucks her and lights bottle rockets wit' his otha hand. If you be a tricksta you gots some serious game my brotha...
The question of course is whether you are serious. Tricksta dude who pretends to channel Dick Nixon and judge folks for sipping an aperitif while enjoying their amuse-bouche at the same time as he advocates whore-mongerin'. Dat shizzle be da hizzle in da hizzouse. It be da bee's knees my friend. That dude is laughing WITH us! Arguin' wit' dat dude be like fencin' on da discussion board -- en garde, n'est-ce pas?
But KA-ray-ZEE-AZZ dude who believes he is better than somebody who drinks responsibly -- like most folks do -- owns a gun an uses it responsibly -- like many folks do -- or smokes a little Mother Nature without hurting anybody -- like a number of folks do. Dat dude is also kind of funny. But he is being laughed AT!
Which dude are you?
discussion comment
12 years ago
You are probably correct Doug... the thing that makes me wonder is the coded enemies list. An enemies list without code would be just plain sad. But an avant garde trickster might just put one up in code...a little wink to those in the know.
Regardless, the dude didn't consider the possibility that I actually believe what I posted. After all, I've posted modified scripture. Perhaps I'm a religious nutcase who ACTUALLY THINKS Juice is a visitation of from a planet where the Juicelons appear as cherubim.
Actually...I should start that religion. Less crazy than Scientology. I bet I could get lots o' free pussy from HAWT female acolytes. Have to go recruiting at universities... Coo-el!
discussion comment
12 years ago
Welcome back home my brothah. Perhaps I shouldn't have told the others, but I let it slip that you went home. I know those Juicelon Strip clubs be da shizzle. But we need ya here to show us the light.
JUICE CREW!!!
discussion comment
12 years ago
BBBJCIMNQNSQWERTYUIOP my brothah...it is all da BBBJCIMNQNSQWERTYUIOP
discussion comment
12 years ago
I dig gettin my BBBJCIMNQNSQWERTYUIOP OTC. dat shizzle be messy in da club
discussion comment
12 years ago
On a serious note Mr. Drac-a-roo... I'm puzzled by why you engage directly with those on your double secret decoder ring enemies list.
I honestly don't know if you believe what you post or whether you are simply jerking our chains. If the latter, I say to you BRAVO!!! You do an incredible job of playing a dude with -- let's face it -- a major vice who judges everybody who has ANY vices you don't share. And the character keeps a public enemies list in an easy to break code. I think i saw something like this in a short that played as an experimental cinema once. I remember not liking the short -- there is a fine line between avant garde and stupid. It was stupid. But you play the super-groovy whoremongering judgement-passin' dude character perfectly -- and that character is a friggin' RIOT!!
Alas, whenever I suspect folks are playing around like that they are actually serious. And I feel a little sad. After all...if you didn't find this topic funny you didn't have to comment. If you aren't joking, perhaps you should think about why you did engage.
discussion comment
12 years ago
@Drac... Hmm...I'm trying to be amusing OR funny. Thanks for the complement my friend. Many people would say that I was trying to be funny and simply assume I was ALSO trying to achieve the state described by the synonyms of "funny". So I somehow have the ability to try to be funny BUT not try to be amusing. Or is it the other way 'round?. Even if I achieve neither I am impressed by my own ability to achieve this superposition of synonyms. It is like Schrodinger's thesaurus. I did not know I was capable of that. Pretty f'ing cool if you ask me.
Wait... Is that why I'm on your double secret Dick Nixon enemies list? Or have you removed me? Wait... We're not supposed to be able to break your super secret code.
Let's have some fun. Perhaps you could try to be sanctimonious or try to be pharisaical. You lose the game if you achieve both!
discussion comment
12 years ago
I have just FOUND an image of a Juicelon in his true form...
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/89/Tetramorph_meteora.jpg
discussion comment
12 years ago
Doug my man...don't be worryin'. Ain't no power in the 'verse that can get the ol' J-man band!
discussion comment
12 years ago
I'm not too surprised this thread has degenerated... There isn't too much to say about this topic. The problem I see is the best summarized here http://xkcd.com/386/
I don't know who GMD has on ignore (perhaps I'm on the ignore list...) but the folks that amuse some of us clearly irritate others. For example, I find the jokers on here a real laugh. Some of the "serious" stuff can be interesting, but I feel there only so much that can be said about certain things. So I enjoy the over the top stuff as well as some of the fun (but not over the top) anecdotes. But I don't really consider the "cuh-RRAY-zee" commenters trolls. I find some of that amusing.
I'll be serious for a moment... I know this isn't going to happen, but one solution is simply to ignore those we really don't like. Really ignore them. No announcements that you're putting folks on ignore, no coded enemies list (ok, I only know one person who has that going on), no engaging those you consider "trolls" whatsoever. But that is hard to do. After all...someone on the Internet is wrong!
PEACE OUT my Tuscl bros. (even those of you who have me on ignore...or your double secret groovy Bletchley Park approve enemies list)
discussion comment
12 years ago
N.B. the crazy orthography is my attempt to capture the true voice of the Juiceman on the page. But such a voice cannot be captured. It is like a parade of beasts...first a lion, then an ox, then a man, and finally an eagle. In his home Juice has six wings and all four faces. Repent all ye and follow the words of JUICE.
discussion comment
12 years ago
Thanks goodsouthdude for stepping up and trying to bring some o' the inspired Juice insanity to the boards during el juice-bo's unexplained absence.
I like the onion ring start, but we need to go somewhere inspired from there. Let's see...
So...I showed up at.da.club after ordeRing delivery rings o' da XXXtra kris-pay kind. I get that shizzle DELIVERED to da klub cause dat be da way I Roll dawgs. You ever get delivree food at the club my brothahs? Good stuff, espeskially if ya ask the delivery girl to show up Nekkid wit some xxxtra hot too-bas-koh sause and a shitload o miracle whip.
Ring delivry girl was fuckin hawt soi face fucked her stageside while shoving a krispee Colonel drumstick up her ass. When I came was fucking.intense. Has that happened to you?
Oh, and after I blew my load on the delivery girl's mouth...WE CUDDLED
discussion comment
12 years ago
Esta, you would want to wear a condom when you do that. Not like you're just all covered in Santorum. I'm with gatorfan. Front door, side door, backdoor...all good!
discussion comment
12 years ago
Damn, I've never gotten a good response when I wear my "I dig ATM machines...but not the kind run by a bank!" T-shirt.
What do my fellow pervos think? Too subtle?
Potential modifications:
1. Third line "and I'm willing to pay for the privilege of using one!"
2. Cartoon of a girl getting assfucked then sucking dick.
Which one sounds better?
discussion comment
12 years ago
Juice my man...ya know I love ya like a brother...but srsly, lay off the mayo. To much fat when you add it on top o' the Colonel's xxxtra kris-pay and Taco Bell-rific food. Eat more veggies... I hear cucumbers that have been up a strippers ass taste de-lish on salads.
Juice on bro...
discussion comment
12 years ago
Don be sayin' dat G-fan. Canada be da shizzle.
Alas, Canada is also expensive since $CAD and $USD hit parity. Haven't been to Ontario or Quebec since the good old days, but I have hit Nova Scotia and BC recently. Spent more than I planned both trips (and many Vancouver ATMs wouldn't take my card...how am I supposed to pay strippers if I can't get cash?).
Despite that issue, Canada be friggin' coo-el! I want to break out in song... "O Canada...."
discussion comment
12 years ago
C'mon tumbin-dude...wake up on the wrong side of the bed? I dare you to refute my claim that a gun can indeed be used as a can opener. I suppose I could stipulate more than you not minding holes in the wall (e.g., you may get a visit from law enforcement, esp. if you live in an apartment). But I think most people with common sense can infer and act accordingly. As for the cuttin' o' trees - google is your friend...confirm if you want to.
Who be ridin' da short bus now?
discussion comment
12 years ago
C'mon tenisbum-dude. My advise to start rappin', play video games, quit workin', and encourage his girlfriend to "date" pervos with money not getting any love from you? Gotta admit it is a different way to go. And if the dude be trollin' it be pretty appropriate.
discussion comment
12 years ago
^^^
LOL Gatorfan.
You know you can use a gun as a can opener if you don't mind holes in the kitchen wall? And if you get a big enough gun you can cut down a tree! (Saw it on Mythbusters...I think it was a 50 caliber machine gun, 3000 rounds per minute...I want me one of those 'cos I want to defend mysef if young toughs accost me --I bet it would be way more intimidating than a 9mm)
discussion comment
12 years ago
@GMD. True dat. Will probably encourage OTC. Strippers probably be thinking "IRS don't need to know 'bout no OTC tips, do they?" In other news, Juice be plannin' a Kansas trip. Packin' up a whole BUNCH o' cucumbers now!
discussion comment
12 years ago
Fun is good!
discussion comment
12 years ago
More4Me probably hit the nail on the head.
Low mileage club = no big deal.
High mileage club = never know if Juice has been in the club shovin' a cucumber up her ass while he fucks her.
Now you jes' gotta ask yourself..."if my girlfriend regularly has a dude named "Juice" insert produce in her anus while they are having coitus would I be troubled?" If the answer is yes you might want to find some way of assuring yourself that she doesn't do that shizzle.
Seriously though, I'm a romantic. You probably have a gut feeling about this. Think about the club she works at (e.g., check whether it is on Juice's hotlist) and have an honest conversation with her.
On the other hand, you could embrace the role of stripper boyfriend. Start a band (don't actually have to be musical BTW). Buy an X-box and get really good at Haloor whatever the kids play these days. Quit your job!!! After all, she is making money. If you go this route, encourage her to find a rich boyfriend, preferably one named "Juice" who will pay a LOT because he is all into DPing her with produce.
discussion comment
12 years ago
E'ry day my man...e'ry day. I awoke yesterday with a lion body with the head of a man. When the tats are complete my hour will have come round at last. A tattooed child, slouching towards Bethlehem to be (re)born.
But I don't drink my friend. Spiritus Mundi consume my consciousness. I am like the falcon, turning and turning on the widening gyre. I cannot hear the falconer.