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11 years ago
Pudding in da pussy. Fuck yeah!
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11 years ago
It has got to be under the table Slick. Problem is that you get paid in ass cucumbers and the Colonel's XXXtra KRIS-pay!
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11 years ago
With that in mind, I still say that true humor should emerge at a higher level, from situations and social interactions. It should be something that transgresses the boundaries that were de facto established by the joke teller. Something that both makes chocolate milk squirt out your nose (assuming of course you are drinking choco-milk when you're reading TUSCL) and permits sophisticated hermeneutics afterward.
For example, the funniest thing on TUSCL in the last month has been Cambydude's many fails. Individually, some were not particularly funny. But taken as a whole: GOLD!
I'll leave aside Camby's obvious limitations with the written word (though I have to say that "disillusional world" was comedy gold). No, none of us are writing perfect prose here. Indeed, I sometimes indulge in different affectations for humorous effect. Perhaps it is a combination of a bad keyboard and autocorrect. That has gotten me on my iPad more than once.
No, the true comedy gold was linked to his attempt to embarrass Juicebro. He still doesn't understand that folks read Juice's post at stripperweb and actually started to discuss the Juice post rather than ripping on Juice. Another funny part is that Juice is so good natured he wouldn't have even cared! But Camby thinks he won that interaction! As good ol' Bugs Bunny would say..."what a maroon".
I could go on but won't. I gots ta save me more comedy for later! But I will nominate Camby for the first annual Alucard award in posting excellence. Any seconds?
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11 years ago
Mikeydude, you're on a roll. That is actually pretty amusing.
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11 years ago
Right on Clubber
...or should I say Darth Clubber
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11 years ago
Right on slickbro. That teach the haters!
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11 years ago
^^^
Of the force????
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11 years ago
Depends on the girls SC. A little low on the lights can cover a multitude of imperfections on the dancers. Indeed, the one place I've been in that was quite bright (Cafe Risqué in north central FL) is also freaky. It is like a Denny's with naked chicks. You sort of wonder if they tell the girls "either shave or wear a hair net down there"
So I'll go with in between. Light enough to not need bat sonar when you enter during day shift (that dark covers a LOT of stripper imperfections) but not as bright as a dinner.
And the club should have hot chicks who don't NEED low lights!
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11 years ago
Mikeydude...I normally don't dig your sense of humor. To straightforward and not sufficiently "meta". But I have to admit this was chocolate milk comin' out of the nose funny!
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11 years ago
Oh, and Drac...you might want to update your age.
You do realize that reporting your age to four significant figures would require more than one update per day to maintain Vulcan precision, n'est-ce pas? After all, 1 earth day is approximately 0.0027 earth years.
Perhaps you are trying to use Vulcan years. But remember that Star Trek canon places Vulcan in the 40 Eridani system. 40 Eridani A is cooler than the sun, so Vulcan would orbit closer in. Hence, Vulcan years would be shorter. So you are being illogical.
With that said, don't get me started on the fact that 40 Eridani is a triple star comprising a flare star and a white dwarf that presumably shed most of its mass. Not a good candidate for a habitable world. But Star Trek was always a bit too optimistic regarding the number and location of "class M" planets.
Us Trekkers need to stick together, no? IDIC my brother...IDIC. Live long and prosper.
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11 years ago
No. No nekkid girls on Facebook. Just folks who over share. I want the labia 2 inches from my nose (assuming there is no disagreeable odor and the chick is hot) not some post about what breakfast cereal the person ate.
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11 years ago
Traveldude... Whiskey will twist you far more than weed or psychedelics. And remember, DXM is totally legal if you're worried 'bout getting caught. Just buy some cough syrup and blow your mind my friend!
But Bella, be a good girl. Don't do meth. Take my cough syrup advice. Just be sure it doesn't contain any active ingredients 'cept DXM. Especially acetaminophen (paracetamol) since that'll destroy your liver in high doses.
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11 years ago
But this same conversation happens in many strip clubs across America. And Canada. Probably not Europe though. Moreover, there are an infinite number of parallel universes. So how is a stripper going to figure out which club in which town in which universe all of this happened in?
The names Jada and Memphis won't help. Remember...infinite number of universes dude.
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11 years ago
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ilbbaicnlKeep it in my pants when I do OTC. If I were a stripper it would stand for I like big bucks and I can not lie.
Dude...WTF? Do you want an anusparade or something? Why don't you PM Bonerbreath? I'm sure he can help you.
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11 years ago
Wait. Was it really Drac? Did he tell the officers to repeal the 2nd amendment? Did he tell them not to drink or reveal his PMs? Did he ask for their email addresses so he could continually bombard them with wacky messages?
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11 years ago
Esta my brother. Use enough acid and you won't know what happened.
You'll ask yourself "what happened last night? I don't think I paid for a hooker...no, I gave this hot space alien $500 and she let me do the anal probing...she was hot, like Kate Upton but with these really big, all black eyes... wait, was I even on the planet earth? I think there was some kind of hole that took me somewhere...wormhole, bunghole, asshole...who the fuck knows. "
Stear clear of alcohol though. Bad for you.
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11 years ago
Not heresy my bro...TRUTH. Says that stuff right there in first chapter of the fucking Bible. If you can't trust God, who can you trust?
And remember this my friend...Mr.Crowley also dug weed. When the good LORD and the BEAST agree it HAS to be coo-el!
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11 years ago
Juice, dude... You need to fly Dallas and dance for Bella.
Don't worry Bella. Help is on the way. This dude is going to show up at your door and give you a private show. Bella, you just pay him in fried chicken and weed. And shove the occasional cucumber up your ass for his amusement.
Juicedude -- if Bella is hot, take a picture of her shoving produce up her ass and post it for your bros..
PROBLEM SOLVED!
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11 years ago
Testify Juicebro...TESTIFY!!!
And God said, let the earth bring forth GRASS, the HERB yielding seed
The creator of the whole fucking universe wants us to smoke herb my brothers. But DON'T MESS AROUN WITH MR. BROWNSTONE!!! That shit ain't coo-el.
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11 years ago
Bonehead dude... If you want to insult somebody, at least be funny. Pay attention to what Tumbling dude did, dude... See how he subverted expectations by asserting that you be a dancer.
And I bet Bonerbreath isn't just any dancer. No boner is like the ugliest beyotch in the club. And has the biggest Adam's apple on any dancer in the club.
So which of you sick fucks get lappers from Boner? I know one of you guys must have. Admit it...you'll feel better!
Was it you Juice?
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11 years ago
As an old Deadhead I hate myself for saying this... "Just say no"
Weed is cool and will hopefully be legal at some point. Just don't get all stoned and run your car into somebody else. Psychedelics can be coo-el if used with care. I had many an entertaining time watching the walls melt. Hell, once when dropping acid while camping my dog transformed herself into a bear and my friend's dog transformed himself into a bat. Then two space aliens driving a Ford Econoline were buzzed by a black helicopter that locked its hippie seeking missiles on us.
But it was all good. Know that if the Evil Spirit arms the Tiger with claws, Brahman provideth wings for the Dove. Do you dig that? Thus spake the super-guru.
But stear clear of coke and heroine my brother. They are the Tiger's claws. Stear clear of those who use
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11 years ago
Fucked up.
How much you want to bet Ricky-dude is calling up the news to see if one or both of the kids are girls, thinking "give it 11 to 14 years...new prospects"?
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11 years ago
We're you watching one of the Jackass movies before you went to sleep?
I could see the Jackass dudes showing up at a club after taking some laxative. That would actually be pretty funny. I'd love to see the stripper reactions.
But no. Never happened to me. And strippers actually put up with a lot of shit from us pervs, so (in reality) the Jackass idea wouldn't be funny in reality. So don't do it Juicedude!
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11 years ago
@ranukam... Agreed.
Let's not sign a death certificate for ol' Drac yet. Nobody has given that wacky dude more shit than me (well...not true...Dougsta has given more shit than me but I've given my fair share) but I don't wish him any ill.
I hope that crazy dude is still with us, enjoying BBBJs from a hot redhead stripper.
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11 years ago
Jack-dude...but there is good dirty and bad dirty. You ain't doing it right unless you hit the good dirty my friend!