Comments by oscarlomax (page 6)

Where does this ignorant idea that BLM is a hate group come from? Baffles me. I know Pundits who react with fear label it as such but when are people going to take a deep dive and look at others sources outside of Fox News? Staying in your comfort zone stunts your growth. I'm just so amazed at how folk just swallow the soundbytes and drink the Kool-Aid. The way I learn is to start off by asking, "Why?" Then I take a deep look at what the principles of a thing are and then contrast that with how it's practiced. And then I look at who's saying what and what are their motives. Seeking real truth takes a minute and taxes your mental faculties but it's necessary. It's so easy to listen to Tucker Carlson and folks like this with their fear mongering and maybe if I wasn't blessed with curiousity, a brain, and a good education, I might fall for the Oke-Doke.

I saw Terry Crews being interviewed by both Roland Martin and Don Lemon about the backlash he received about his remarks on his social media. Crews(or Crewes) issued a concern about BLM devolving into a more extreme faction that leans toward Black Supremacy. He has a right to post his opinions on his Social Media. He also knows folk will come for him because of those statements. The Fox Pundits tried to make hay out of this because it supports their fear-mongering narrative that BLM is a terrorist group out to trample the rights of "Good White People." Any reasonable person knows that's silly. Roland asked Terry for an example of how Black Supremacy was being manifested. Terry said not yet but it could happen. Terry told Don that blacks kill blacks everyday and BLM is silent about that. He believes Black Lives Matter is an important mantra and we should call ourselves out as well to keep the movement honest. Don said that BLM was designed to combat police brutality against black folk and that black folk killing each other is a legitimate issue but not the focus of BLM. He said maybe Terry should spearhead a campaign to address the issue of black folk killing each other because it is a serious problem and there are people who are addressing it but every little bit helps. The thing that got me was how many outlets want to portray Terry Vs. Don as some big major beef when it was just a regular interview with both men expressing their opinions. There were differences but it wasn't a shouting match and I didn't get the feeling these guys dislike each other. Don made an interesting point to Terry's extremist concerns. He said MLK was considered an extremist by those who opposed him. I don't dislike Terry. I'm not sure I buy the Black Supremacy concern because to be a Supremicist of any kind you must have enough organized financial resources deployed to make your domination a threat. Kind of makes me chuckle. And it made me think of that Harry Belafonte movie, White Man's Burden where the racial divide was reversed and John Travolta was the radical, angry white man driven to his wit's end. Interesting concept but obviously not written by a black man with any historical awareness because black folk might not necessarily exercise their dominance the way many wealthy white folk with a certain agenda have. Just think about how the Moors handled their dominance of Spain. Besides taking over and running things, they also created major institutions of higher learning. Yes, they were fierce warriors but also had this deep reverance for education and believed that even the conquered people should go to school. I'm not mad at Terry. I just don't think his opinions are that resonant.

There's also this weird assumption that if black folk were in control, we'd do the things to other folk that are being done to us and that's not necessarily the case. Goes back to my point about me having a better understanding of the dominant culture than they have of me. We've got to stop living in fear. Because that's the key devil behind a majority of the problem.

We all know this country isn't perfect. Compared to others, some that decide to come here believe it's a better situation. But not everyone had the choice to be here or to leave and that really isn't the point. Wherever you are, there's nothing wrong with trying to make it better. And better for some folks will not be viewed as better by others. But we can at least check out the other and have the courage to consider why does he/she feel that way? ....or not. Some people are too set in their ways. Thank goodness there are those who know they don't know it all and understand there's life outside their bubble.

Clubbing mostly around the L.A. area, it seems other areas in the country are "clipped" in more outrageous ways. But there are some standard grafts like marked up ATM fees, expensive watered down drinks, and maybe higher priced parking. In most L.A. spots you can find free parking close to the club and feel pretty safe about leaving your car. There are a few exceptions. I've only been to one club years ago near DISNEYLAND where the dancers would come offstage after their set and solicit everyone for a tip regardless of whether you were sitting at the stage or somewhere else not paying attention and trying to get with another girl. I thought this was weird and I wasn't going for it so I just politely shook my head, "no." The girl just moved on to the next guy. I've never been pressed to "tip" a bouncer to "look the other way" when doing a VIP in an extra's club. This practice, however, I did encounter in Vegas but I wasn't having it and when I started to walk away the dancer said, "That's okay" and took me back there anyway. So, again, it's informative to hear how some of you guys have to deal with the who shakedown thing in your own neck of the woods.

IceyLoco, I get it. It's very interesting that people who don't have your experience try to tell you how you should feel. A step in the right direction would be to honestly listen to the people who have had the experience and resist the knee-jerk reactions. There are always people who profit from the pain of others. Those folks are not helping. There is also real "proof" of institutionalized racism. Face it. Admit it. Now we can look for solutions. Decent people don't want to "burn your house down." Decent people want to be able to forge their own path without having to deal with the added barriers of systemic racial roadblocks. A significant number of folk in the younger generation are being brought up in a more inclusive environment than older folks. Maybe part of the solution is that the older folks in power need to die out and let their ideas die out with them. I know, very cynical, but not improbable or impossible. Personally, I prefer enlightenment over tribalism ideas fueled by fear. Trauma is a deep thing and it just doesn't die out as a matter of course. We have to help it along. Some will always be traumatized but we can help reduce the cumulative effect by listening and having the courage to learn. I'm a black man who grew up in California, went to Howard University, lived on the East Coast for years, and returned to the west. I have relatives and ancestors all over the south and in Europe. Because I've lived all my life in this society I understand many things about the dominant culture who likes to "borrow" cool stuff from my culture and that's okay because sharing is supposed to be how we learn about each other. But the dominant (mostly European based) culture doesn't, as a whole, understand me as much as I understand them. And that's problematic. Before you start reacting with anger and dismissal, re-read carefully what I've laid out and think about it. Really think about it.

Now that I think of it, quite a few strippers I've known told me they were nursing students. I always laughed and didn't really take it seriously until one woman excused herself from our table and then came back and showed me her nursing shoes! Then I started thinking about the commonalities of both professions. They are both healers and aim to get you "up" and about.

I think it depends on the club and the culture of the club. I'm a black man and I've gone to many different types of clubs. At one particular high-end club where the majority of dancers were Latinas and white girls, there was a black girl who kept giving me and my friend the evil eye. I approached her and asked her how she was doing and if she would like a drink. She was shocked but accepted the drink and we talked. She said most black men that frequented the club preferred the other dancers over her so she didn't even try. I don't think she was aware of her sour look. I didn't end up getting a dance from her because I felt no joy in her but I understood better her attitude. My buddy danced with her. Conversely the Latinas and thicker white girls were all over me. The "spinners" tended to avoid me. I guess that stereotype of black men liking the phat ass girls plays into this. I must confess, I do like voluptuous women (not fat) and athletic ladies with a cushion. My buddy, who is also black, likes the rail-thin girls that coud be carried off by a strong wind. In some of the 'hood clubs I've been to, I notice that white, older gentlemen seem to get a lot of attention. I'm not hatin.' It's a money game. I'm not ignored in these spots and usually after a comfortable conversation, the more down to earth ladies relax their "hustle" game and get more real with me which encourages me to be more generous. With a lot of the older white guys, it always seems like their playing this role (not all the ladies but quite a few in this particular club) and the guard is never really down. As a rule, most dancers I would be interested in, have personality and curves. I don't think a woman with an overt racial issue would ever approach me and if I got a sense that a dancer had this problem I would move on. I'm there to have a good time and escape from the everyday "blues."

I've known about for years. It directly ties with black family reunions, church homecomings, and the homecoming celebrations every year on black college campuses. I went to Howard University, but even before that, I had an awareness about Juneteenth because I read a lot of historical accounts particularly those by Ivan Van Sertima, Lerrone Bennett, Jr., John Hope Franklin etc. Dr. Greg Carr has a very informative, entertaining video that explains the significance of Juneteenth and how it connects to what's going on today. Really worthwhile, insightful information to increase everyone's level of awareness and understanding.

@Yahtzee So you dated one black girl. She doesn't speak for all of us. And neither do I. Rather there are a variety of experiences. And even though you really want to hold onto the idea that the 21st century is not affected by what came before, that is not the case. I'm not in love with the words "liberal" and "conservative" and a be all and end all to an individual's outlook. Some things I have a more "conservative" viewpoint about and some things I have a more "liberal" viewpoint about. I'm definitely not one to believe I should just sit and wait for my dreams to come to me. I put in sweat equity for my progress. Still I'm not cool with obstacles put in my way that wouldn't be there if there wasn't a pattern created by systematic bias. We will disagree all day long because you don't want to understand what it's like to be me, and that's a fact of life. But what can change and improve is the systemic non-sense in my way. Now I'm not going to stop moving forward. I can chew gum and walk so I will always call folk out on their ignorance and narrow-minded attitudes as well as continue to try to educate folks that there are legitimate reasons for the anger.

Interesting. I'd like to see her debate Roland Martin , Michael Eric Dyson, Harry Belafonte, or Stacey Abrams or even Republican, Tim Scott. Candace has always appeared to me to be political opportunist. I remember when she engaged the NAACP to help her in a racially charged educational lawsuit. Now she seems to be on the opposite end of things. It's this kind of history that has me questioning how intelligent she really is and how sincere she really is.

@Yahtzee Do you even hear yourself? You keep spouting these stats that occur because of atrocity that happened 400 years ago in this country. Classic not looking at real cause and taking refuge statistical bullshit! And yes the "colonial" mindset is real. Until you deal with the reality, you'll be forever traveling in an echo chamber. But that's who you are. Fortunately there are others who aren't afraid to look at what's real instead just clinging to a hollow knee-jerk reaction.

Stats are just numbers. The real deal is the cause. A stat cannot explain that. What we are seeing are the devastating side-effects from a 400 year-old atrocity. During the ensuing years, some people benefited from this atrocity and other people were further denigrated. That's why the Mitch McConnell balk at reparations, (I'm paraphrasing)"I wasn't personally responsible so it makes no senses for me to pay." But the truth is Mitch, and those that echo that stupid sentiment, is you benefited from the results. Cut the excuses and deal with the real shit. Stop hiding behind distractions. It's annoying, exhausting, and insulting. True, whatever we do now will never make up 400 years of inhumanity but, it can help to build a future where our children won't have to inherit the trauma in the same way we have. To understand where I'm coming from, you must dare to step outside of "COLONIAL" mindset.

Agree. This article is interesting reading.

I'm not a conservative and I don't usually vote Republican. But some ideas I'm more liberal about and some ideas I'm more conservative about. I classify myself as a rational, thinking person aspiring to the highest level of humanity. I'm a work in progress. With that said, I don't think the if one party defeats the other that there will automatically be doom and gloom. I don't even think Trump is a real Republican. He's an ego-centric opportunist with the mindset of a severely education deprived child. Whatever politicians get into power must be held accountable by the people and adhere to the Constitution or seek to make amendments. If that structure is not followed than the hypocritical nature of things will lead to chaos. One of the things I hate the most is fear-mongering. There is a reason, that for years, more centrist thinking has kept us all somewhat in check. Nobody gets everything they want but everybody, though we may grumble and complain, is allowed to live another day. But now we're in a dire situation where "down the middle thinking" is all but gone. It's important to balance the scales so that opposing viewpoints can safely debate. We have to remove the fear.

@Yahtzee I didn't say racism. But I will be clearer here. That situation coupled with many similar situations I and many other black folk, crossing all socio-economic lines, points to structural bias. It wasn't that I was driving too slow as other cars in front of me were driving at the same rate. They passed the officer and he chose me to pull over. Look at it for what it is. I'm not saying police don't pull over other people for different reasons. I'm just saying those reasons don't apply to me. Not when this kind of thing has with more regularity to me and similiar folk. It's a pattern. The first step in correcting a problem is identifying it. When you hear thousands of people say the same thing, pay attention. It's an issue! I work both in the entertainment industry and the field of public education. The majority of my colleagues of color have experienced the same thing. And a few of them have higher levels of contacts that I in the justice system.

Regarding the police---it's not always the big incidents that are disturbing. It's the little indecencies. In 2000 I was driving my brand new green some may say sports car through Beverly Hills late one night. I was going very much under the speed limit in a residential area. A police car pulled me over. I quickly hit speed dial on my cell and called my cousin who was an Assistant DA in Inglewood and told him quickly what was up as the cop approached my car. I put the cell on the dash board with the speaker on so my cousin could hear what was to follow. I put both hands on the steering wheel. The officer asked me what I was doing in the neighborhood and where I was going that late at night. I told him I had just come from San Diego and I was on my way home which was north east of Beverly Hills. He asked to see my license and I showed it to him. My cousin chimed in and asked to speak to the officer. This startled the man. I looked at him and explained that my cousin an ADA was on the line the entire time. My cousin repeated his request and asked for the officer's name and I said it. The officer gave my back my license, got in his car and left. Had I not been a man of color driving a sporty car late at night would I have been pulled over? Had I not been trained in how to deal with this kind of typical humiliation tactic and not had a significant legal person with some juice behind me, what could have happened? Fortunately, we'll never know. But there have been many attempted indignities like this thrown at me. I don't get violent or act a fool. But I don't take shit lying down either. It's not about me blaming the officer. It's about how I , and many others, have to be hyper-vigilant everyday.

We are the some total of our experiences. It's interesting to here non-black folks perspective on the issue of racism. Some really do listen and think. Others are so caught up in their own thing that can't venture beyond their own wall. Still others try to justify certain positions because of facts and figures presented in the media. I don't think blaming is the answer but it's frustrating when folk won't face the fact someone from another existence in this country has an experience different from yours. Blaming causes people to get defensive but it's necessary to get that frustration out because it didn't start yesterday. This issue is over 400 years old. Has there been progress. In certain areas but it isn't enough. With any hot-button issue stuff is going to come up that makes us uncomfortable but don't leave the table. Listen...even if you can't relate. Listen...even if it doesn't seem to make sense to you. Then analyze and study a broader spectrum of history. Not just the "edited for television" version. Check out ideas from those scholars that don't look like you. Keep the conversation going.

Why don't folk call it "white on white" crime like they do "black on black" crime? It's just crime. But the fundamental issue is why all of this is happening. It's systemic. It's not just a few bad apples. I have friends who are in Law Enforcement and they all have told me the pysch evaluation comes at the end. That should be at the beginning. But it's deeper than that. A policeman should not be asked to be a social worker and a shrink. That's not his job but his job is not indiscrimately harrassing folk either because of some faulty "profile." And all that is rooted in what we've been fed as a culture. If individual behavior is to change, we must first change the structure. That's what the protests are all about. The real protests.

After the 1st time Kap took a knee, he explained how he consulted a teammate who was an ex-military man. That man told him taking a knee was something that both honored what the flag represents and called attention to the fact we, as a nation, must work harder at living up to the promise of that symbol. Somehow after this man explained in clear cut term what it was all about, all of these reactions that seemed to dismiss what the man said started flying around. He made it clear what he was calling attention to. In terms of the larger issue of systemic racism, you can't diminish the issue by copping out the comfortable, soft slogan, "All lives matter," because Black lives are disregarded. It's hypocritical. Why do you think so many people are upset? The steps must take are reforming the inequality that exists by reforming attitudes and then taking action by redistributing/investing money into education, business, and law enforcement (including re-thinking the concept of public safety) and both local and federal levels. It's not really an indictment of individuals as it's an indictment of a system that's been in place since slavery. I'm a student of History and currently I'm reading DEACONS FOR DEFENSE by Lance Hill. It ties in with the policing issue and deals with how black communities starting in Louisana had armed black men defending their residences against the KKK. The KKK were firebombing houses and brothers had had enough. The police force was standing around and being ineffectual. That's just the beginning. The actual problem started long before. Check out these authors---Ivan Van Sertima, Lerone Bennett, Jr., John Hope Franklin to help give you another perspective on a history not taught in a majority of schools. You will understand how shallow and stupid people like Candace Owens and Stacey Dash are. Just the historical record alone betrays the ignorance and distructiveness of that thinking. Also check out Tim Weiss. Knowledge is out there to give under-exposed folk a fuller picture.

Yahtzee, Here's what happened with my mother. A white women was brought in to do the job my mother was doing. My mother was tasked with training her and then this woman would assume the supervisory position my mother had and my mother would then be her subordinate. When my mother asked why this was being done after she had done this job for months and had been praised by some superior officers, this new woman was brought in. This is is why I have a problem with that situation. There were many other instances along with this she encountered while serving this country that contradicted the "freedoms" she was supposedly fighting for. The bigger issue here is enlightenment. If someone is angry about something, before any of us jump to the conclusion that the person is just complaining because they are spoiled etc., inquire as to why they are upset. Really look at it from another POV. When we do that, we begin to grow.

Candace Owens is a FOX friendly conservative with opinions that are definitely counter to mine. She definitely re-inforces certain very narrow views of the situation. But that's her right as much as it's my right to disagree. But the real problems behind all of this aren't going away until everyone deals honestly with what's up. You can find a million excuses and try to dismantle the obvious disparities that divide us but that's counterproductive. Yes, the media does sensationalize events but being a black man, I've lived this bullshit and I'm sick of it. Don't worry, not going to burn down a business or loot a store and most folk that share my sensibilities are not about that nonsense either. But we do insist and will persist to excavate and bring to light all the challenges that stand it the way so we can elevate and really live up to the promise of what it all should be. Ask yourself why folk are really pissed. Look deeply and think!

Looting and criminal activities are, unfortunately, conflated with the actual protests and this is a big problem and another distraction folk want to emphasize while diminishing the real issue. It's not about handouts or folk crying "victim" because they had a bad day. It's about the destructive nature of systemic racism. I as a black man face it all the time. I fight it and move forward but it's a reality that needs to be dealt with. If my experience is not your experience, then actually listen and learn and then things have a chance to improve. True, you have the right to be narrow-minded and proudly wrap yourself in the veil "Everyone has the same oppurtunity, so why are they so upset," or you can have a more open attitude and understand there are lessons in basic humanity to be learned. I do my best to take responsibility for my shortcomings and try to understand where others without my unique experience of understanding both the macro and micro-cultures of today. I've lived in both worlds all my life and have met many who have open minds as well as those who can't see beyond 3 ft in front of them on a sunny day. I'm hoping there are more of the former.

The reason people jumped in his ass is because, like many people, when the original kneeling moment occurred, some chose to focus on that distraction of "disrespect for the flag" rather than deal with the reason for the event which is injustice by LE toward black folk and people of color. Brees is not a dumb man but is stuck on a distraction rather than the reason for the outrage. My mother, who served in the military, and I had this very discussion when the even first occurred. She said she could understand the feelings but respect for the flag was important. I pointed out to her that many black folk, like her and I, served in the military only to have the country they served discriminate against them when they returned. Pretty difficult to kiss the hand of your oppressor in those circumstances! I pointed out her battles with inequality in the military when she was a communication specialist in the Air Force dealing with top secret transmissions. She's very articulate, an incredible typist, and very strong in critical analysis which is what the job required. Still they tasked her with training a "white" replacement for her job! My mother had to pause and take all this in. She now understood where I was coming from. Bottom line---you must deal with the cause of the problem and ignore the distraction to effect change. A protest, by it's very nature, is supposed to be inconvenient and uncomfortable.

I enjoy your stories. I'm an avid reader as well as a writer and peoples different POV's fascinate. You guys will probably hate this but I'd be more interested in a shot of her face than anything else. It's a character thing.