discussion comment
7 years ago
Huntsman-->"Being honest, I think I would have taken her when the opportunity arose later. I don’t see how I would be really accomplishing anything meaningful by declining."
Huntsman, my experience overall is that 1. if you give these girls an inch, they take a mile, 2. they are smart and trainable. I think just as the guy in a different thread, who gave $50 to a stripper who texted him to beg for money, has trained that stripper to text him for money more often, the main meaningful thing declining does is teach her that if she wants his business, not to treat him that way. By contrast, doing a dance basically tells her she should work the room every time before going to him.
Obviously, if he does a $500 VIP with her, that would probably over-rule any other lesson :) But I'm guessing he's not doing that. Declining is the best thing he could have done, unless he wants to be treated this way regularly. I tend to have more requirements for the experience I'm looking for than most here, and I do believe that I'd almost never be getting that experience if I rewarded girls for putting me last.
rockstar-->"I think the dancer jackslash had was either lazy or stupid"
rock, To take a dancer perspective for once, it could be just as likely that she has a perfectly good reason -- she knows jack doesn't spend well, or she doesn't like the way he smells, or she doesn't like the way his balls "accidentally" fall out the bottom of his basketball shorts, or any other number of things that makes dancing for him unpleasant. I am, of course, *zing*ing jack :) But I've had girls treat me this way as well -- for whatever reason, they just plain don't like dancing for me, and would rather take anyone else's money before they give up and come to me. It happens.
discussion comment
7 years ago
#NoLasagnaForYou
#tusclClapBack
I would love to say I've reached the point of enlightenment where it's 100% about whether I get my hands on those luscious melons. But I'm still not there -- if a dancer treats me like a dink, I cross her off my dance card. To the extent that there's any fantasy I want her to sell me, it's that fantasy that she's not totally repulsed by me, and it's just too difficult to suspend disbelief in that regard if she behaves the way you describe (like Warrior, I get it that she might have had previous commitments, but coming over and not sitting down when invited is a bit wonky). I'm enlightened enough that I would not have sat there steaming and hurt, but I would have sent her on her way
discussion comment
7 years ago
Paul: absolutely agree that if you're going to tip, at least get some stripper credit
discussion comment
7 years ago
Are you sure these guys are rain-challenged, versus they just think making it rain is ghetto or cheesy so tipping her their own way? It's pretty uncommon for me to tip heavily at the stage, but when I do, I couldn't be less interested in making it rain. LOL at a guy who thinks I'm "making it rain wrong"... I have more than my share of faults, but "attention whoring douchebag" isn't one of them :)
'course, it could be that you're right, they're actually making it rain wrong ... that just wouldn't be my initial thought, given how many of us think making it rain is so cheesy. But, you DO have to make sure the stripper knows you're the one who tipped her
discussion comment
7 years ago
Many of the clubs in this area do, at least for nightshift. I would definitely cross that club off my list. If all clubs did it, or the only good club did it, I guess I'd just deal -- like some of you, I don't care about leaving a paper trail, I'm just against it on principle.
I do know that a number of guys have reported that at the smaller clubs, just grease the bouncer a $10er and he'll let you through without scanning. Obnoxious, but another option for those of you who really want to go to a club that scans, but can't risk the paper trail
discussion comment
7 years ago
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flagoonerEverything written by this member is a fact.
Humble brag: Stripper texted me asking for money, so I showed her who is boss by only giving her $50
discussion comment
7 years ago
I am a firm believer in Chris Rock's quote: "As a father, you have one job: keep your daughter off the pole".
Changing subjects for a moment, I recently had a conversation with a young family member, who asked me my opinion about her joining the army. I very strongly argued against it. This does not mean I do not respect, admire, and have tremendous gratitude and appreciation of those who serve. But my young family member is in a position to have lots and lots of other options, and I do not give a fuck whether that makes me a hypocrite, my loyalty is towards my family member and pushing her in the direction that I believe would make her happiest, while keeping very low risks such as dying.
Similarly, I can respect strippers and, more importantly, have appreciation for the fact that they give so much of themselves in exchange for mere money... while at the same time recognizing that the environment is incredibly toxic, and IME, all but a very strong few exit the business with some level of damage or other. Don't give a fuck whether anyone thinks I"m a hypocrite for this or not, but I'll go on enjoying strippers while following Chris Rock's prime directive, for which I believe he should have won a nobel prize.
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"she did then ask me to buy moneypaks lol"
Of course! ANd she knew your initial response was bullshit from the beginning .... so now you had to be direct anyway, after having been caught in a lie... good lesson :) :)
Honestly, even after everything I said about not being passive aggressive, I do typically wait HOURS to respond
discussion comment
7 years ago
JAprufrock-->"But I’m thinking if I gave her any money I’d tell her to come over and get it and be prepared to suck my cock, or allow me to masturbate her with a dildo or something."
You put it a bit coarsely but I think you have the right idea -- if you are inclined to give her money, keep it in the context of your relationship, which is strictly a business one. That said, remember that she's a person, no matter what eye-rolling bullshit she's gotten herself into, it might be very real and panic-inducing in her. It might be tempting to try to turn this into a win-win, but it definitely is worth thinking twice about whether you want to be involved in her drama or enabler of her negative mental state in any way. IMO.
max_starr-->"The last time I was asked for money....Please western union to me..."ok.....I'll send you money"....I waited 30 min and texted her back, "apparently I'm banned from WU from sending money to strangers, sorry babe"..."
I realize passive-aggressive and conniving type approaches are very tempting -- I used them myself for years, it just feels like an easier way to avoid conflict and not get her pissed at you, especially if you're intimidated or worried she'll pull the benefits. But as a general rule for the sex industry, my overall experience and how I felt about my own behavior both improved by order of magnitudes, when I started being more direct and assertive. And it also avoid followups like, "will you paypal it to me?" "Here's my checking account #, will you just go to the bank and put it in there?".
discussion comment
7 years ago
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shailynnThey never tell you what you need to know.
While I haven't used such services, I do Amazon Fresh quite a bit. I still go to the grocery store at least half the time, but often I find it incredibly convenient to just order on Amazon fresh. Like many of you, I tend to leave produce and meat to in-person trips, but I've even been backing off on that, having gotten some great steaks on Amazon Fresh (produce is so-so and best left to in-person). They deliver the next day. So, if I'm running out of all kinds of staples, and too busy or tired to hit the grocery store, Amazon will have everything I need on my porch the next morning.... not bad.
I'd rather support the stores directly than Amazon, so as these services spin up, I'll probably try them out.
discussion comment
7 years ago
+1 to both of my arch-enemies and bottom bitches:
-->"Where getting fleeced by strippers after paying them for sex is considered classy."
-->"Chivalry in strip clubs will often be exploited as a sign of weaknesses aka "being an easy mark""
Take this more as a brotherly what-the-hell-are-you-doing rather than criticism, Nate. But given the things I'm sure you know about strippers (that this wasn't a special request to you, but that she texted all her regulars and everyone she thinks is weak; that strippers often look at generosity as weakness; etc), it really is worth examining why you'd send her any money at all ... what negative thing did you think was going to happen if you didn't?
discussion comment
7 years ago
You think strippers are bad, wait until you hit SA :)
I think you just trained her to keep hitting you up, and in these types of girls, generosity is met by resentful entitlement, not gratitude. I'd say the odds are, she'll keep hitting you up for free money, since that what you taught her to do, and you'll either keep having to send it (while giving her a stern lecture about how your relationship isn't there yet) or fire her completely. If you wanted to best odds of continuing to tap her, you should have ignored her texts, or perhaps a short polite text explaining why.
Not that I don't make exceptions to this. I had an ATF who a few times I put money in her bnk account a few days before we met for OTC. On the other hand, she was also fine when I came low on cash; she trusted me to put it in her bank account when I got home (I've never done western union; had her send me a text image of a voided check, and used that info to deposit directly to her bank)
discussion comment
7 years ago
I don't understand... why would ignore her in the club? Because she doesn't look good in civilian clothes? Because she's so pedestrian that she shops at Rite Aid?
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"Sometimes I'll ask the bartender what the girl drinks and simply nod to him. Very rarely does the dancer not sit down."
Warren: Not an argument -- if this works for you, and gives you the experience you want, that's great, keep it up. But, if we're going to talk about the "how" of buying her a drink, not just "whether" we buy her a drink... my approach is always to keep complete control of the drink order. Keep in mind, if I buy a girl a drink, I'm probably going to buy her 4 or 5 more, so it's important for me to keep the cost under control... I always give the stripper very few choices ("let's do a shot! vodka or tequila?), then order for her, since I don't want her calling an audible to the waitress or bartender. I can't remember the last time a stripper I'm with has said a word to the bartender or stripper, other than to clarify whether she wants a back. Good liquor at the clubs I go to costs $15-$20 a shot, so I basically tell her "I have enough for drinks, plus two VIPs. I'm not going to the ATM to get more money. If you want to drink high end liquor, we'll just do one VIP instead. Or we can just do the house liquor and I'm down for two VIPs". Obviously, I don't phrase it so starkly, but that's the general message I send her. Shockingly, in 100% of cases, she picks drinking swill with me, and getting two VIPs.
Anyway, just an alternative approach for those who are going to buy lots of drinks and need to keep costs under control -- take complete control of the drink order, discuss and come to an agreement on what she'll drink before you ever talk to the waitress or bartender.
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"the girls are chill and hang out because they know the crowd doesn't really pick up til 10 PM anyway). "
That is my usual strategy too, when I go to night shifts. Of course, it's still got the classic tradeoff-- the hottest of the nightshift girls don't even show up until 11, so you've got slightly better than dayshift girls, at slightly worse hustle levels. That is, I find that while 7pm-10pm the hustle is DEFINITELY more mellow than later at night, it's still nightshift and these are still nightshift girls -- the bouncers are more on their toes, the girls get away with less, and while they'll hang out, it's still higher hustle than dayshift. Maybe I'm imagining it, but that's definitely my feeling
discussion comment
7 years ago
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impalaThe People's Republic of Pennsylvania
Me and impala can fuck his girl at the same time
#ImpalaMadeEyeContact
#IThinkOurBallsTouched
discussion comment
7 years ago
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impalaThe People's Republic of Pennsylvania
I'm hoping impala becomes a stripper's boyfriend, so I can come on here and tell everyone I fucked impala's girl and then came in her hair.
#YoGirlGaveMeChlamydia
discussion comment
7 years ago
Buying the stripper a drink is the 2nd best deal in the club (buying her food is the #1 best deal). That is, if you want to spend lots of time with her, on the cheap. At least in the clubs I go to, not buying the girls a drink is classic penny-wise pound-foolish
Of course, from what I read here, there are lots of clubs with outrageously priced (like $25) "dancer drinks" that contain little to no alcohol... I'd likely not buy a stripper a drink in a club like that, *or* I'd just order shots at the bar, without telling the bartender that one is going to a stripper, if that's possible in these sorts of clubs. Luckily, I've never been in one
discussion comment
7 years ago
Fuck to the no. To the fuck. To the no.
discussion comment
7 years ago
Agree completely, it can be a different club on dayshift, far more permissive as far as what the girls can get away with, plus girls who are motivated because there aren't many customers. That doesn't matter if all you have to choose from is 4 ugly girls, but find that club with a decent lineup, and you can usually get away with far more
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"Subraman the 15-25 and 8-15 girls dayshifts seem few and far between. As in only a few clubs in a few major cities have more than 10 girls on dayshift. I think the "3 to 6 ugly dancers" is more the norm than the exception"
Well, how do you like that. SF might suck as an SC city overall, but maybe we have better dayshifts than most. Some of the most beautiful strippers I've ever met have been dayshift girls (some, of course, eventually moved to night shift, where they were instantly the hottest girl on nightshift, also). Maybe the 15-25 attractive strippers on dayshift club is especially rare
discussion comment
7 years ago
Anyway, if I had only ever visited the 3-6 ugly dancers on dayshift clubs, I would be sitting around wondering why guys liked dayshift, too.
discussion comment
7 years ago
Dominic: I think this is a matter of doing your research, plus picking the right club for the experience you want. Around here, there's:
- Multiple clubs that have 3-6 ugly dancers on shift
- One club that has 15-25 girls on shift, and this club's dayshift is hotter than most club's nightshifts (SF, so weak comparison)
- A few clubs in the 8-15 girl range, hit or miss on hotness
I do go to that one club with the big, hot lineup ... but with nightshift level hotness comes more nightshift level hustle and crowds. Not as high hustle and low value as nightshift, but I don't go to this club often because on busier shifts, it's still too high hustle for me. The club I go to the most is in that 8-15 girl lineup range, knowing that if I haven't already made an appointment with my hot CF, I may find another girl but it may be a no-joy.
I think among the important things to take advantage of are:
- There may not be as many of them, but the hottest dayshift girls will be as hot as the hottest nightshift girls. In fact, if you ask, I'd bet many of those hottest nightshift girls will tell you they started on dayshift, so many of those hotties you see on nightshift did rotate through us dayshifters first -- and we got them for more time, for less money. All you have to do is find a club that isn't one of those "5 ugly girls on dayshift" clubs.
- Once you do find that hot girl, you're set. It doesn't matter that the rest of the shift is all 6s. You get a hot stripper all to yourself, at dayshift economics & mileage... at least until she realizes she could be charging guys double for half as much time on nightshift, and moves :)
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"just because it is a good time slot for the dancer doesn't mean it also isn't a good time slot for a PL"
I'm not so sure I agree, warren; or rather, that hasn't been my experience. I have no doubt that we tuscl folks, being the PL version of elite forces, live by the ranger code "Improvise. Adapt. Overcome." Hoo-rah! I'm quite certain that, if I HAD to do nightshifts, I'd adjust my expectations, style, and the type of experience I was looking for. But IME, if it's a time when the dancers are making a lot of money -- I'm not saying that you can't work the system and get what you want, but if you're looking for long leisurely table time and high mileage for not much $, I'm saying it's going to be more difficult than a time when the dancers aren't making money. That said, if you're not looking for that, and you're just looking for a couple of dances from a lot of different hot girls, then nightshift's greater pulchritude makes more sense to me
discussion comment
7 years ago
-->"Go to a club at prime time. Find the best dancer you can and ask her schedule. Then visit the club on her slowest shift nd you cam have the most fun with her. That's my technique when I wamt a new favorite"
I've done the exact same thing! With the exception that instead of asking her schedule, I ask for her number, and specifically set up an appointment with her during the days I *know* shifts are slow. I've found that it doesn't take much to get girls to change schedules to make appointments with you. In addition, when I do go on nightshifts, I find many times the hottest nightshift girls don't show up until 10pm or often later, because (at least around here) 7pm-10pm is fairly dead. But, once they know I"m spending, we'll set up an appointment for 7pm-10pm and I'll enjoy prime nightshift hotness at near dayshift value