Dancing and hypocrisy - could a loved one be a dancer?

34 comments

• Uprightcitizen

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  6 years ago

  Its an interesting question and a relection on how we feel about the profession. I have a dancer who I have visited one or two times a month at her place for maybe 2 1/2 years. She is a top talent girl and has been dancing for at least 7 years. So, we share some things and I told her I am seeing a young SA girl regularly for maybe 6 months. SA girl is a good kid, former teen model from a rough family situation, dropped out of HS and a former weed smoker and rebel since she was 14. She is super bright and cleaned up her act a couple years ago, got her GED, doesnt do drugs or drink too much, going to college and still living with disaster mom. She has some family friends who bought her a car, has other decent family ties and she is working as an intern in her future profession. I also bought her a computer for school and she is doing pretty well and on a good path to a regular career. So, to my point my long time OTC dancer says "Did you tell her to try stripping for $?" My response was "I diddnt want to be that guy". What I mean is I diddnt want to put her down a path where her old bad habits could manifest again and send her off the rails. I would also feel kinda like a pimp for some reason. Could she succeed? Sure, but she could also go down in flames hard and I would not want to be a part of that. Judge me as you will.
• shailynn

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  6 years ago

  ^^^ sounds like there's no reason for her to become a stripper. Of course the dancer you're seeing probably would have a hard time understanding that. Sounds like her rebellious past could head her for disaster if she's in a club 3 nights a week where everyone is getting drunk and a lot of dancers/customers are smoking weed as well. Maybe/likely she'd be fine and have no issues, but why put herself at risk?
• AnonymousJim

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  6 years ago

  I'd be all for it on the condition she be smart about it. Avoid the drugs. Do your best to avoid drama with other dancers. If they go seeking it, don't give them the satisfaction of engaging in it. Let the other dancer dig her own hole and get in trouble. See it as only an income supplement. Have another, or an additional, plan. That way, you can also choose not to do things you're not comfortable with if you don't want to -- like drugs, OTC with customers you don't necessarily trust, odd acts in the club that weird you out, whatever. Keep your head screwed on straight. The guys might think they're falling in love; don't let them. The guys might think they own you; remind them they have to stay within their bounds, or let the bouncers do that for you when needed. Then again, don't be afraid to make things extra great for the right guys, particularly if you benefit. If the club doesn't treat you right or make you feel comfortable, find another club. If no club does, then don't do it. I'm a believer we should share our gifts if we don't get hurt while doing so. I'm not one to hoard my SO. I've always told her, if another guy comes along you like, and it's just physical or playful, go for it. As long as you (and whatever other guys) still recognize what we have and don't disappoint, hurt or embarrass me in the process. Don't do that, and I'll both let you enjoy others and others enjoy you, as long as you let me enjoy others and let others enjoy me. I think it can be done. You just have to be smart about it.
• twentyfive

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  6 years ago

  Why should I be logical about someone I care about, especially a family member. Don’t think for one minute if my daughter thought of dancing it would sit well with me. Sorry to break this news to anyone who thinks differently, but I’ll bet if you were honest with yourself, anybody who’d be ok with it doesn’t have any children.
• skibum609

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  6 years ago

  I played poker in a game that also had three lineman from the power company. My nephew was a meter reader and because of the huge money differential I always told him to be come a lineman. Now we have two lineman in the game because a year ago one of them touched something he shouldn't have touched. I tell my nephew he is smart to be a meter reader. I would hate it if any of my family members were a dancer, prostitute, drug dealer, scam artist etc.
• jackslash

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  6 years ago

  I forbade my grandma to become a stripper, but she didn't listen: [view link]
• realDougster

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  6 years ago

  "I would hate it if any of my family members were a dancer, prostitute, drug dealer, scam artist, divorce lawyer, etc." There, fixed it for you.
• Warrenboy75

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  6 years ago

  If I found out there would be an interesting discussion at the very least and I would hope that I haven't deluded myself into believing I have the basis of a solid relationship with the family member to have the conversation. If you recall some of my past comments on here my one and most recent ex became a dancer after I met her and broke off the relationship. When we got back together ( Both times) I convinced her to stop dancing although it became a flash point for heated discussions each time during the relationship. I suspect she is back dancing now from what little I have heard and I also suspect in her case it will further cause her harm both physically and mentally. All dancers claim when you see articles on line or when you talk to them they are the mythical unicorn and can keep it together. Also there seems to be a book somewhere written with the standard pat answers to give when asked why they dance, etc. but in most cases I suspect it is never as great as they think it is going to be, seldom do they dance, save the money as fast as they think they are going to and get out without a few scars if they ever get out at all. I've known a few girls who are dancers for an extended period of time. It's changed all of them and not in a good way. I'm sure the counter point would be it's too small of a sample set to draw a conclusion but from what I have observed its conclusive enough to know I wouldn't want any of my family to be a dancer.
• PeterEaster

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  6 years ago

  No daughters, but I would not want my nieces to be dancers. By the same token, would not want my sons to be PLs either. Thank goodness they're smarter and make better choices than me.
• skibum609

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  6 years ago

  I pity you Dougie. You should concentrate on getting yourself fixed so that you never breed.
• realDougster

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  6 years ago

  Q. Would I let a loved one or someone I care about become a dancer? A. Over twenty-five's dead body
• Call.Me.Ishmael

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  6 years ago

  I enter and leave strip clubs at will. Dancers don't and it's an incredibly toxic environment like. You don't need to read many threads here to recognize that. Some women can navigate that environment, but many more can't. I have no problem reconciling my patronizing strip clubs with not wanting anyone I care about to work in one.
• Subraman

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  6 years ago

  I am a firm believer in Chris Rock's quote: "As a father, you have one job: keep your daughter off the pole". Changing subjects for a moment, I recently had a conversation with a young family member, who asked me my opinion about her joining the army. I very strongly argued against it. This does not mean I do not respect, admire, and have tremendous gratitude and appreciation of those who serve. But my young family member is in a position to have lots and lots of other options, and I do not give a fuck whether that makes me a hypocrite, my loyalty is towards my family member and pushing her in the direction that I believe would make her happiest, while keeping very low risks such as dying. Similarly, I can respect strippers and, more importantly, have appreciation for the fact that they give so much of themselves in exchange for mere money... while at the same time recognizing that the environment is incredibly toxic, and IME, all but a very strong few exit the business with some level of damage or other. Don't give a fuck whether anyone thinks I"m a hypocrite for this or not, but I'll go on enjoying strippers while following Chris Rock's prime directive, for which I believe he should have won a nobel prize.
• flagooner

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  6 years ago

  It's ridiculous when people say is hypocritical to not want our daughters to strip. I'd prefer her not to become a police officer, circus performer, or garbage collector too for various reasons just to name a few, but I am grateful that they perform the services that they provide.
• RandomMember

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  6 years ago

  "....it's an incredibly toxic environment" ____________________ +1
• Cashman1234

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  6 years ago

  I’m a pl, and I enjoy extras clubs, and filthy dancers (and whores too). That’s the truth. I won’t never want my daughters to strip in a club. I know what occurs in clubs, and I know how I handle myself in clubs, and I don’t want my daughters to work in those places. Again - that’s my view. If one of my girls decided to dance, I’d support her. I’d make sure she understood everything about the clubs and the customers who frequent them. My view is that most dancers aren’t working in clubs because they’ve trained and gotten the proper schooling - and are now prepared to make big money by dancing. I think many girls dance because they have hit hard times, and lost jobs, and they need money. Some need money quickly. I don’t look down on dancers. I understand they are working hard - and it’s not an easy lifestyle. I respect the balls required to get on stage. But, I want more for my girls.
• rockstar666

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  6 years ago

  Since my daughter is in medical school, she would only dance if she needed the money, which she doesn't. The irony is though she has a dancer's name, and certainly is pretty (and shaped) enough to be quite successful. I prefer she becomes a doctor though.
• RandomMember

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  6 years ago

  ^^^ sugaring forum has at least one SB who's a med student. She talks about dating established surgeons.
• RandomMember

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  6 years ago

  "dating" should be in quotes
• LIGHTINGKAY

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  6 years ago

  What make a stripper any different than any other female. This is the conflict men love, men are good. Men wished females where as they imagine them. Females set the terms for interaction, and men decide if they want to marry, date, strippers, escort or truck stop whores etc...or not to engage females. Men love thier wives, duaghters
• flagooner

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  6 years ago

  Huh???
• LIGHTINGKAY

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  6 years ago

  Really-HUH????
• rickdugan

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  6 years ago

  Dominic posted: ---> "Sure, I’ll let that white, polyester suit wearing guy from NYC play with my daughter in a hotel room for a hour before she sobers up and changes her mind. Ooo-kay. Seems fair. I’m open minded." Thanks for that btw Dominic. She was a real champ and took it every way I gave it to her. Oh, and if by sheer coincidence she's calling you Grandpa in 9 months after giving birth to a beautiful white baby, then, as the wise man Shaggy once said, "It Wasn't Me!" I almost felt guilty only paying her $100 for everything she did, including that fantastic warm-up blowjob. However, that guilt lessened quickly when she started crying at the end and I felt the overwhelming urge to get her back to the club pronto. You'll be happy to know though that I was enough of a gentleman to actually park in the club's lot and let her out with dignity rather than rolling slowly by the building and making her jump out. ;) All kidding aside, your underlying problem is the belief that viewing and treating others differently than your own family is an inherently bad thing. It isn't, at least not if you're doing your job as a father. I doubt that many of the girls that I fuck OTC were ever supported the same way that my kids are. I'm guessing that very few, if any, of them were straight A students in AP and gifted classes in great schools like my kids are. I also suspect that most of them were not brought up with a lot of intact family support and religious training or had access to the extracurricular activities and other resources that help my kids gain skills (and confidence) and grow as people. Net-net I think we all know that most strippers come from challenged backgrounds and have limited avenues for potential growth. And yes, that reality is what allows me to have so much fun with much younger women. The girls that do this also endure a lot in the process, as well all know. But just because I do what I do with these girls, why in the world should I feel obligated to want the same thing for my own kids? I really don't get the contradiction that is supposed to make me and others hypocrites for enjoying strippers while not ever wishing it on our own children. But I suppose that, in this instance, it would be hypocrisy that I could easily live with.
• lolruned

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  6 years ago

  You can enjoy watching the NFL and not wish it upon your kids to pursue a career in football. This same logic applies to strippers. I would not wish it upon my own children to ever have a need/desire to pursue stripping, even as a side gig. It would mean, for me, that I failed as a father in that they felt they didn't have the necessary financial security and future prospects
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  A guy was petrified because his 16yo said she was going to 'run away and become a stripper.' I helped to put the guy into San Quentin for molesting her. But he was a terror on all fronts. You can't force anyone to live with you, even your minor child. If a minor is dancing in a strip club, then that club can be busted. But eventually the age of consent will be reached and then there is not a damned thing you can do about it. Acting like you own people is what will make life nasty brutish and short, and it will also get you in serious trouble. With the above guy, he had a lawyer who has devoted his career to making all child protection laws unenforceable. He had coached his client in how to invoke this paternally protective image. I played a huge role in help the Prosecution tear that to pieces. This is why when the defendant was convicted and remanded, after notifying the three daughters, she notified me. And don't think I'm mean or like to put people in prison. My preference would have been to have handled him myself. San Quentin is too good for him. :) :) :) SJG
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  Dominic, you are talking like it is up to your own sense of fairness and ethics whether or not a woman gets to dance at a strip club. When you get out of religion and the conservative sphere, the world does not work like that. Women are every bit the persons that men are. Consider, you are seated at the stage getting off watching some hottie spreading her legs in front of you. From behind you comes an angry voice, "No one's going watch my wife naked, except me." The whole premiss has to be that women have full personhood.
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  And this is why strip clubs need bouncers, and they need to be backed up by police. Most males do not real accept female personhood. SJG
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  You know the strip club joke? I go into San Jose's T's. I pay for my drink. Guy a table over says, "He what are you doing fooling around with my wife?" "Which one is your wife?" "The one I saw you giving money to." SJG
• stripfighter

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  6 years ago

  Depends on which loved one you're talking about. If I had a daughter, I'd say no way in hell, at least initially. I say I might come around to it, but who knows what reality brings If it was a GF/SO, I'd be open minded. The thing is, it's not the stripping that's the most bothersome. It's the toxic environment, day in and day out, managers, co-workers, clients, etc. It takes a certain person to not let that wear on you, and everyone responds to such experiences differently. What would lead her to be more susceptible to the negative lifestyle of it?? I'd say someone who's social life and financial life revolves around it. By that I mean if all of her friends become or are only other strippers, and her sole source of income is stripping or somehow SW related. Now if she did it more so as a supplemental income, had an exit strategy, and an outside support group, maybe I might be open to it. But then again, maybe this is how many a strippers start out.
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  Guy tried to bully and control his daughter. I helped her put him in San Quentin. :) :) :) Minor's can't dance in strip clubs, but anyone else who wants to can. Strip clubs only exist because women have the same rights as anyone else. SJG
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  This girl N., always these hyper drama relationships, and one time her boyfriend trying to intercede in the doings at our local clubs, an air dance. He got banished. She quit the next day. All just senseless drama. Later on at another club I would tell her so. SJG My Pentecostal Daughter Molestor's Appeals case, after some years of grandstanding, died in a fizzle, last month. He is going to be a guest of the state for quite some time. :) :) :) But his church still runs and it is full of familial child abuse of all types. ex-Doors, Moscow 2011 [view link]
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  Last month, my Pentecostal daughter molester, living in San Quentin, his petition before the appeals court, it collapsed. It always was just grandstanding, trying to intimidate and confuse judges. Because I am on the email notification list, I got the full 25 page decision written by the court, a comprehensive analysis of the trial case and the appeal. I am impressed with the job they did. SJG Libertarian BitCoin Fantasies, Puerto Rico [view link] [view link] Yes or No? Puerto Rico I think [view link] [view link]
• san_jose_guy

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  6 years ago

  ^^^^^ But his church is still running, and familial child abuse is a built in component. SJG SF AMP Slut [view link] NOLO, Chartres - Iberville, doesn't the black girl in purple look good? I think this picture originally came from Google Street View [view link] Chelsea Manning, running for the US Senate from Maryland, quite interesting [view link] Steely Dan - Katy Lied (1975, Studio Album) 09 Any World (That I'm Welcome To) [view link] Bring It On! An Inflated Stock Market Is Evidence of Spiritual Sickness, And It Is The Death Of Creativity And Innovation [view link]
• Dominic77

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  6 years ago

  .