What am I--chopped liver?

Fuck her you should have said >no lasagna for you !<

#butthurt #choppedliver

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You did the right thing xspecially since you have VIP'ed with her before. Dust that bitch...

I can see not coming right to you after the stage as she may have had a previous commitment to those other guys. But that really seems odd that she walked up to your table and then would not sit down when invited.

#NoLasagnaForYou
#tusclClapBack


I would love to say I've reached the point of enlightenment where it's 100% about whether I get my hands on those luscious melons. But I'm still not there -- if a dancer treats me like a dink, I cross her off my dance card. To the extent that there's any fantasy I want her to sell me, it's that fantasy that she's not totally repulsed by me, and it's just too difficult to suspend disbelief in that regard if she behaves the way you describe (like Warrior, I get it that she might have had previous commitments, but coming over and not sitting down when invited is a bit wonky). I'm enlightened enough that I would not have sat there steaming and hurt, but I would have sent her on her way

That has happened to me too and I think it is a case of being taken advantage of. They know your habits. They know that you will be around. So go get the other guy first and then come back for the sure thing. I can put up with them getting a few dances with other guys first but if she goes to VIP with them. she has lost my business. At least for the day.

What Shadow said.

Trying to understand why some of these girls make the choices that they do is like trying to understand why some infants like to play with their own poop. There may be no logical reason at all and burning brain cells trying to come up with one is a recipe for brain damage.

But even if there is a logical reason, I'm not sure that it makes a difference. In your shoes, I would have done the same thing. When a girl goes out of her way to show a guy that she really doesn't want his money that badly, then that guy is foolish to trip over himself to give it to her anyway.

The consensus so far has been that others would do as you did. But you said she is the most attractive girl in the club and you took the time to post here. So I assume you wanted her bad but you “showed her” by depriving yourself of what you wanted. Being honest, I think I would have taken her when the opportunity arose later. I don’t see how I would be really accomplishing anything meaningful by declining.

I'm with Shadowcat. I've had new (to me) dancers that I've done VIP with hit up other regulars thinking I'll still be there for her later. Last time this happened I left the club before she got around to me.

My ATF handles this well. When I arrive she always comes to me; I buy her a drink if she wants one. Then she takes care of her whales if they were already waiting, but keeps me in the loop until it's my turn by coming over to me between prior commitments.

I think the dancer jackslash had was either lazy or stupid. Either way, he did the right thing by demanding, with his actions, that she respect him as a customer. She had her chance and obviously didn't provide the service. If she just didn't like him...well that's up to her if she wants to dust a potential regular. Frankly, as long as you don't smell bad, most dancers will be your regular no matter what. Best to move on!

Was she also walking those other guys to the door? Because that would really sting!

But seriously, I could stand not being #1 on her 1-n list (say if it's one of her regulars, or someone who already lined up a dance), but being the n-th choice is too much, especially if she's just sitting with other guys or circulating as you mentioned. That sound like she was treating you as her fail safe, last resort option.

BTW, I've had that same "What am I --- chopped liver?" thought when sitting with dancers and they're bemoaning how dead the club is, e.g.: "There's nobody here tonight."

if she says she'll come see you once she gets off stage, and then makes the rounds with 'wanna dance' instead of coming directly to you, she's snubbing you, cause she knows she can use you as a last resort.

the appropriate response from any dancer on stage would be to tell you that she had promised her time to other customers first, and that since she knows you, if you would not mind waiting a short time for her to finish up.

My thoughts are along the lines of what shadow posted - she knows/feels you are sure $$$ and wanted to work the room for additional cash b/f spending time w/ you - she probably knows your visits are long and that you'd be there later.

Or - she knows you have high expectations (sucking and fucking) and was either not in the mood for-that that day or was not in the mood for you.

Huntsman posted: "The consensus so far has been that others would do as you did...So I assume you wanted her bad but you “showed her” by depriving yourself of what you wanted. Being honest, I think I would have taken her when the opportunity arose later. I don’t see how I would be really accomplishing anything meaningful by declining."

The consensus is that he did the right thing because these salty dogs understand that a bad attitude during the preliminaries rarely translates into a great experience one a PL's pants are down around his ankles. Instead he allocated his resources towards someone who seemed more eager to take his money, which likely translated to a better back room experience than he would have received from the reluctant girl. So IMHO he made the right decision, even if he got there through a bit of petulance rather than dispassionate thought. ;)

Huntsman-->"Being honest, I think I would have taken her when the opportunity arose later. I don’t see how I would be really accomplishing anything meaningful by declining."

Huntsman, my experience overall is that 1. if you give these girls an inch, they take a mile, 2. they are smart and trainable. I think just as the guy in a different thread, who gave $50 to a stripper who texted him to beg for money, has trained that stripper to text him for money more often, the main meaningful thing declining does is teach her that if she wants his business, not to treat him that way. By contrast, doing a dance basically tells her she should work the room every time before going to him.

Obviously, if he does a $500 VIP with her, that would probably over-rule any other lesson :) But I'm guessing he's not doing that. Declining is the best thing he could have done, unless he wants to be treated this way regularly. I tend to have more requirements for the experience I'm looking for than most here, and I do believe that I'd almost never be getting that experience if I rewarded girls for putting me last.

rockstar-->"I think the dancer jackslash had was either lazy or stupid"

rock, To take a dancer perspective for once, it could be just as likely that she has a perfectly good reason -- she knows jack doesn't spend well, or she doesn't like the way he smells, or she doesn't like the way his balls "accidentally" fall out the bottom of his basketball shorts, or any other number of things that makes dancing for him unpleasant. I am, of course, *zing*ing jack :) But I've had girls treat me this way as well -- for whatever reason, they just plain don't like dancing for me, and would rather take anyone else's money before they give up and come to me. It happens.

Whether it was the right thing to do (to turn her down) - hard to say b/c as Dugan posted who knows what is going thru the minds of these girls and why they do what they do - one day they are a PITA to deal w/; the next time you see them they may rock your world.

If you were not happy w/ her treatment, then I guess you did the right thing - i.e. if you if you would have said yes to her request later, one can say you'd be condoning and reinforcing her behavior and her treating you the same way in the future.

Or - you could have let it slide down your back and just take it as SS - i.e. put your PL-pride aside and just enjoy it for what it is.

I think you did the right-thing - perhaps even if you said yes to her delayed request, it may not have been a good time if she was actually trying to avoid you in the first place.

It’s a business. She goes where the money is.

There is one customer in my club who looks like Jabba the Hut. He must spend money like crazy because every dancer goes to him first, even my faves. I’ve seen him flash the cash.

Do you really want to be the guy who spends money so stupidly that dancers always come to you first ?

mark: there are definitely ways to get the stripper coming to you first (or at least reasonably high in the queue) without spending stupidly.

Early on in my professional PL-career; I had a "semi-fave" in that I would always get dances from her if I was at her club (but I didn't go to the club specifically to see her; would just get dances from her, and others, if she was there).

She would always come up to me for dances as soon as she would see me - then on one busy weekend visit she came up to me to say hello and said she'd be back later and then left to work the room - I did feel PL-dissed but it wasn't a huge-deal as I've always been into variety; but I felt dissed anyway (I don't recall if I ended-up getting dances from her that night - I think I did about 2 hours late as she always gave good-dances).

These days I mostly hit small black clubs where dances are on the floor - so easy to see who's spending/buying-dances - I often buy lots of dances - at times I've had a dancer pass by me over the period of an hour w/ me making eye-contact w/ her and her kinda blowing me off for w/e reason (even though she was not selling many dances); then said dancer finally approaching me an hour or two later w/ a weak "wanna dance" - at times I have said no even though I wanted dances from her (was kinda pissed that she saw me there for an hour or 2 and finally decided to approach me ) - and sometimes I say yes when this happens and just chock it up to the nature of the beast.

These days I try not to let how dancers act affect me as long as they end-up giving me my money's worth

There are some dancers for whom I don’t mind being last on the list, because of the way they treat me. The MILF, for example, *knows* because I’ve told her, that I’ll always buy her a drink or dances or both when she gets around to me, if I’m still in the club. I don’t see any reason to disrupt her cash flow in the club (she has a number of big spenders), when she’s fucking me for free OTC.

In general, I’m pretty laid back about that sort of thing with *most* dancers. I know I’m not the biggest spender she sees, and if I’m not planning on a VIP, I’m not a big enough jerk to waste her time. I *tell* most of them this, and let them know to come see me when they get have time. In turn, I have almost always been rewarded for this behavior by their willingness to come see me immediately if I *am* spending money.

That said, I’m in agreement that the OP probably did the right thing in this case. In the absence of any express or implied agreement along the lines of what I do, sitting there twiddling your thumbs when you could be groping a hot body in dances, getting your dick sucked in the back room, seems like a less than ideal outcome.

AFAIKJack is a regular and a good-spender -and what I gather from the OP is that she may not have had much luck working the room and why she eventually came back to Jack - so in this case it seemed she was walking away from the $$$ instead of going to where it was.

Did you do something to make her mad last time you were in vip? I know I forgot to warn a girl before I came in her mounth after she had told me she hates that and the next time I was in the club she ignored me all night.

Of course a couple of visits later she was desperate for money so all was forgiven.

RD and Subra, I see what you guys are saying. I even admit to being inconsistent in my own mind and my own postings on this topic. The response I posted might have been different on a different day. I know that sounds (and maybe is) inconsistent but I also think situations like this aren’t cut and dried.

Having said that, I’m going to stick to what I said earlier. I think it’s not exactly the same PL level to get a dance (and maybe fuck) from a coy hottie than sending $50 to a stripper for nothing in return. Also, Jacklash is an experienced monger and he bothered to post this particular experience. He could’ve been posting purely for discussion purposes but he related his experience, rather than generically asking. So I take it this was a stripper he wanted pretty strongly, even though he has probably experienced this sort of thing many times in the past.

I also recently had the the same experience of a fun hottie I knew. I did what Jacklash did and went with Plan B and kept my dignity intact at the time. I later thought that I really wanted that hottie and could have had her but didn’t. Generally, going with another stripper is the right move in that situation. But there are exceptions to every rule. For all we know, the hottest stripper maybe been drunk or high or in party mode. In other words, she might not have had any rhyme or reason to the order in which she took her customers and there may have been no lesson taught to her by going with another stripper.

My ATF is one of the most popular dancers in her club. Any time I come in she is right there to say hi. If she already has a line, she will tell me. She will stop by and give me an update about how long she will be.

I understand that. Dancing is how she supports herself and her family and I want her to take home every cent that she can earn. On a couple of occasions, another regular has come in an asked for a dance or more; Summer told me and told me, "It's OK if you say no." I told her to go make her money and that I would still be there when she was done. On occasion, that has allowed her to sell another $120 worth of dances. What both of us understand is that she will finish the shift with me - we've gone overtime on a number of occasions.

That said, my ATF's style is nothing like jackslash's. Walking away and looking for other customers, taking his money for granted, is just extremely disrespectful and is worthy of an immediate shunning. I might give her another chance on a subsequent visit, but not on this one!

“What both of us understand is that she will finish the shift with me - we've gone overtime on a number of occasions.”

Way to work in a nice humble-brag

Stephan Hawking would have taken her up on the offer.

I see both perspectives mentioned.

It’s important to hold your ground with strippers. Any signs of softness can be exploited by strippers (because they are perceptive to ways to get money from customers).

If you didn’t think you’d be able to relax and enjoy the dances - after getting annoyed at that dancer - then it’s best you turned her down.

If the pickings were very slim - and she was the only dancer who did it for you in that club - then she may have been worth a few dances.

Huntsman, I am probably not exactly consistent on this either, it's just how I feel about it this morning, before I've had my coffee :) But, however much vacillating and rationalizing I might do, I think the "I invite her to sit down, she refuses and then goes and asks everyone else in the club for a dance" is something I couldn't get past -- it's just too clear of an indication that she considers me an undesirable customer (I'm probably an undesirable customer anyway, but most of the girls do a good enough acting job to let me pretend I"m not :) . I'm skeptical she'll give me a killer dance in the back, given that, and even if she did, hard to enjoy it as much as I otherwise would.

Of course, if I were a variety guy who was never planning on repeating with her anyway, and/or if I made my choices based almost solely on physical attraction, I'm sure I'd be bending over backwards to find good reasons I should push all that aside. But as it stands, pretty easy for me to pass on anyone who isn't providing the experience I want

ATACdawg’s ATF is the smart one, knows how to become an ATF and stay that way. jackslash’s dancer should take a how-to refresher course from her.

DeclineToState: true, unless jackslash's stripper specifically doesn't want to do dances with jackslash, and was sending a message -- in which case, she did the right thing. Every indication from that story is that she does NOT want jackslash's money, and to me she sent a decently clear message. No reason to try to turn it into something it's not -- I see no reason to think this is a stripper who wants jackslash's money but is not service-oriented; it's a stripper who did everything she could to avoid him, and he smartly took the hint.

^good point. Ouch jackslash

Maybe Jack's dick is too big

Jack, when you're a rick you learn to be assertive and get what you want. Go back wearing a nice suit and she'll notice you.

Trust me, I've hung out a lot with jackthecrab. He's a nice guy. But when he sees a sexy bikini babe on the beach he goes up to her and politely asks whether he can scuttle across her tits.

As a rick I just scuttle right across any tits I want to scuttle across! As soon as a sexy babe sees a crab in a suit those tits come right out. Then we do it crabby style!

Scuttle! Scuttle! Scuttle!

Could've handled it better. Live and learn.

I think all of us aspire to living the life of a rick

It honestly sounds like she doesn’t like you that much, for whatever reason. In her mind, you don’t pay her enough to make you higher on her list. It could be anything, and she obviously doesn’t hate you. I’m sure you have girls who aren’t high on your list, but who you might get to if the pickings are slim.

I always overpay my ATF. ITC and OTC. She knows it and I know it. So she got that respect to ignore everybody if I roll up even if she can make more money from another PL or customer she knows.

Reminds me of a busty blonde stripper I call Missy but she likes to stick to people she knows unless she's trying to get new business. If in a situation where I'm going wtf is she thinking, I remind myself if she was a rocket scientist, she wouldn't be in a strip club dancing for a few bucks here and there.

i had a similar experience with my kriptonite girl. she said i take advantage of her. i replied...”girl... i will take advantage of you every chance i get.”

with that she has saved me a ton of money.

she proved to me that it was all about the money. and NOT actual attraction.

fuck her.

i’d still spend money on her.

She missed out, Jack was gonna offer his lasagna to her.