Comments by parodyman--> (page 6)

Thanks for clearing that up for us HOW. Without smart people like yourself the rest of us would be lost.

I'd like to see Shrek get tattooed like Kerry King and then get on stage, whip out his banjo and throw down with "South of Heaven" or "Angel of Death." Then I'll stop making fun of him. Maybe...

Shrek, You are acting like a full blown psychopath. Get yourself some medication.

Topic Change: How many times has excessive Shreking fucked up a thread?

I wonder which is sharper; his wit or his tools...

I'd tell her to beware of psychos like Shrekitout and cheap old bastards like Shadowcat. Unless dancing for half price is her career goal.

SHADOWCAT: "I am special." PARODYMAN: Like "Special Ed?" or maybe... "Timmy!"

ARBEEGUY: “Prodyman, do your magic on this. Please don't hold back” PARODYMAN: I’ll do my best not to disappoint if you promise to spell my name right in the future. SHADOWCAT: “Yeah, I left myself wide open on this one.” PARODYMAN: Yes you did! But life is full of risks without which there would be no reward. As a side note; as long as you are standing there with your anus agape perhaps one of your well trained followers would take a tape measure and see how far up your colon Shekitout has crawled? The whole of TUSCL wants to know. SHADOWCAT: “My mileage has gotten so strong that I have to go wash my hands after every back room trip.” PARODYMAN: More ego boosting and nothing more. I’m surprised you haven’t had your minions sniff your stink finger for verification. In the future try washing your hands after every RESTROOM trip! SHADOWCAT: “The dancers no longer ask for a lap dance but rather ask if I want to go play. And I do.” PARODYMAN: Meaning what? You beg for half price dances then go back there and play with yourself? SHADOWCAT: “I feel sorry for you guys that run from club to club in search of such dancers.” PARODYMAN: That’s OK because we feel sorry for old fools who drive 200+ miles one way to find dancers that will not only put up with his senior citizen discount dance bullshit but feed into his delusions that he is someone special. We also feel sorry as they laugh at your cheapness, your silk pervert shorts, your Viagra popping and your handing out of candy like you are trying to lure a child away from a playground. SHADOWCAT: “Find a club that you like and make friends.” PARODYMAN: I guess there is no point in explaining to you that these people aren’t your friends. You are nothing more than a business transaction to them. If you are happy go on and enjoy yourself. Just stop trying to convince the rest of us that you are special. It is pathetic. In fact; it smacks of the desperation of one who is trying to believe his own words.

SHREK went to a local SC piercer for a prince albert. They shoved a barbell through his forehead and told him to be proud of what he was by nature.

SHREK: “p-man: Do you think Steve Martin made a trip to S.C. just to buy the banjo he plays?” PM: No I do not. Because he isn’t a hick like you; I’m sure he was able to afford one that wasn’t cobbled together with rusty pipes, soup cans and bailing wire. SHREK: “What on earth is your basis for thinking that banjo music is prevalent in S.C.?” PM: Because both you and shadowcat have done so well representing your chosen State. Your misspellings and your unenlightened attitudes coupled with the ignorance that just drips from your posts makes me think that SC boys are issued a banjo at birth. SHREK: “How much banjo music do you hear on Hootie & the Blowfish's material? I don't hear any. I don't hear any banjo music on the Marshall Tucker Band's material either.” PM: I don’t hear any but then again I don’t listen to that crap. Hootie & the Blowfish? Marshall Tucker? You are just too fucking hip for me Shrek. SHREK: “Stop sterotyping a place you know nothing about, you dolt.” PM: I will, as soon as you and Shadowcat stop acting like a couple of stereotypes. SHREK: “Try getting out of IL sometime and broaden your horizon as well as your material.” PM: I get out plenty. And I am much more tolerant and accepting of different things than you have proven yourself to be. Perhaps you aren’t too old to crack acouple books and learn something. SHREK: “Your shit is really getting old.” PM: Funny, so are you. SHREK: “If it were not for Shadowcat's posts you would absolutely have no life.” PM: Aw Shrek, I live for your posts. They are by far the most ignorant and inbred diatribes of the bunch. Shadowcat may have his bad points but he is still miles past you in intelligence. You are just a bitter old argumentative prick.

"p-man: Again you show your total ignorance-you don't have a clue to where Shadowcat lives. What makes you think he lives in S.C. you dumb fuck?" I know he is within 240 miles of his favorite strip club. Close enough for inbreds like you.

PM: “Shrek where are you? I'm sure you have some kind of retarded retort to the above post.” Boy was I ever right about this. Look at his reply. I think he is sinking into a psychotic fugue. SHREK: “So is your CCW permit from Utah good in IL or are you breaking IL law?” PM: If you read and understood my previous post you would know that the Utah CCW permit is not honored in Illinois. You would also know that concealed carry in Illinois is not legal. Unfortunately this forces me and other law abiding citizens to go without. I comply with all of my state and local laws even if they are retarded and oppressive like you. SHREK: “If you are breaking the law, it would be my civic duty to turn you in.” PM: I’m glad you see being a nosy vindictive prick as civic duty. Someone has got to do it. SHREK: “I will do my best to find out your address so I can do just that.” PM: Aren’t there internet stalking laws on the books? SHREK: “Be prepared for a knock on your door when you least expect it!” PM: Why? Are you planning to visit? SHREK: “You said when you worked, does that mean you don't work now and are a parasite on the backs of those that do work?” PM: I said I no longer work in a traditional shift position. I work from home. I find it much more likely that an oldster like you is the parasite. I bet you never leave home without your fist full of discount cards and coupons. SHREK: “Or are you using your CCW to rob people to support your sorry ass?” PM: I never tried that. Do you think it would be possible to rob people with a card? SHREK: “I know the difference between you and a bucket of shit is the handle!” PM: The difference between you and I is you have that whole backward ass hick thing going for you. This is good, it gives you an excuse for your extremely limited intelligence.

Your poor kitchen cutlery. Depending on the blade style and the grind method you could be destroying good knives. I'd take them to a good dealer (food prep supply) and see if they can be saved.

Wear a hat!

Female genital pierceings are all about the woman. They are there to make her feel good. Performed right they do just that. Read and learn: http://www.bmezine.com/pierce/10-female/clit/A21105/cltaninc.html

I read them when I'm going somewhere new or haven't been in a long time. I'm just looking for straight up info and am not very interested in the reviewer's opinions. I can make up my own mind about things.

Shrek where are you? I'm sure you have some kind of retarded retort to the above post.

"Most clubs I've spent most time in don't even have a VIP room so it's a non-issue." I was going to point out that you didn't need the second "most" in that sentence. But mostly I am put off by you saying it is a non issue. Most clubs have some type of VIP room or area. Then again most patrons aren't pining away for the good old days of 10+ years ago.

OK FONDL. Another opinion from a dude so grounded in reality he references everything through some chic who hasn't been able to hack it as a dancer in the last ten years.

SHARPENING A MACHETE: The general consensus among the more knowledgeable posters on blade forums is to use a FILE. The steel in a machete is soft enough that just about anything will work. And because it's relatively soft, there isn't the same advantage to trying to achieve a very high level of sharpness like there is with a knife. Plus using a file or coarse abrasive gives a toothier edge that grabs better and cuts quite well in the typical sweeping-chopping type action used to clear brush or do most work for which a machete is appropriate. A belt sander with the proper compounds is another alternative but most agree that the file is the way to go.

“PM.” Yes? What can I help you with today?“ I did not purchase it as a weapon.”— Did you not say “I am not totally defenseless.” In reference to your machete? “I purchased it as a curiosity and farm tool.” -- Do you do a lot of farming in your bedroom? That is where you claim to keep this mighty self defense weapon. “My ex wife's father, who was a dirt farmer in Mexico, taught be how to sharpen it with a sand stone.” – Well I can’t speak about what he may or may not have taught you but by changing the angle of the grind on a machete you lessen all of its positive attributes. Now it will never perform the way it was intended. “Have you ever sharpened a knife, axe. maul or anything else that needed sharpening?” – Yes I have. “DREMEL!” – Please do not use a Dremel or other motorized tool to sharpen blades. It will destroy a good steel. They remove too much material from the blade and also weaken it by generating heat in the cutting process. You should only hand-sharpen cutlery unless you have some manner of oil cooling bath to keep from ruining the heat treatment. “My machete is as sharp as any kitchen knife that I have.” – That doesn’t speak well of your kitchen cutlery which is a whole other subject.

I think Ozy covered it.

"OH fuck. I have to agree with Parodyman on this one. The first time I met my ATF she was wearing a black cocktail dress. She always dressed classy. The first time we went out to lunch, she came dressed to kill. She told me that, that was the way she was brought up. To answer the question more directly. I like them nude." HELL HAS NOT FROZEN OVER! Shadowcat has just chosen to show a little class. I appreciate the effort it takes a beautiful woman to dress to impress me. My current favorite just looks so damn good in a long sleek dress that it makes you want more. She also can hold her end of a conversation and is a pleasure to be around. I want someone to captivate me for an hour or two. She knows how to do this and she does it very well.

“PM, I knew the moment that I hit the enter button that what I said would bring out your flame.” -- How could you be so lonely with so many “followers?” One would think that if shadowcat were to shake his dick Shrekitout, Bobbyl and snowball would fall off and scurry around like the crab lice that they are. “First off all the advice from my uncle was over 40 years ago, when I did have guns.” -- This has relevance how? “I am not totally defenseless.” -- Your mental acuity says otherwise. “I have a machete in my bed room.” -- Used for intimidating those SC prostitutes into giving you the senior discount? “I bought it at a hardware store in Guadalajara, Mexico some 30+ years ago.” – All by yourself? You are the king of TUSCL! “It is part of a Mexican ensemble but it is as sharp as a razor.” – You run around your neighborhood dressed like Poncho Villa? Brandishing a 30+ year old machete no less; I bet your next ensemble has sleeves that tie in the back. Now as far as it being sharp as a razor, I bet that the machete is more like it’s owner; dull, rusty and uncared for. Just for educational purposes a real machete is NEVER anywhere near razor sharp. They are generally made from a spring steel (think automotive leaf springs) and ground with a utility edge of about twenty degrees. It is more of a farming tool than a weapon. But if it makes you feel safe…

Shrek and his little private message: SUBJECT: Pay Pal PRIVATE MESSAGE: Do you have a PayPal account? If so, send me your info & I'll send a contribution toward passage for your sorry ass to go to some other country, especially one where a dictator is in power & see if you can still have the freedom to lamblast me, Shadowcat and all the others you love to on the TUCL discussion board. Fuck you! MY OFFICIAL ANSWER: Shrekitout, Are you one of those morons fishing for financial information to steal? I doubt it. Rather you appear to be one of those Jerk-offs who think that freedom and rights only apply to likeminded dildos. Perhaps I’d take you more seriously if you were to get an education or at least learn that the correct word is lambast not “lamblast.” As for why I hadn’t bothered to answer your private message; I prefer things were done in a public forum. Why should I waste my time replying to stupid messages like yours? It is much more fun to let everyone see what an asshole “love it or leave it” kind of a guy you are. Fuck me? No thanks. That seems to be the province of that banjo playing old man’s club in SC; not my thing.