Comments by gentleman_scholar

"That's just fucking ridiculous no offense. You are being too paranoid, if you want to see her go see her." It's different for different girls. With this one it goes to her head and the asking for things never stops. But putting her on hold every once in a while keeps her grounded.

I was actually hoping for some serious insight and discussion, being why I started a thread separate from the one Phatboy99 started. Every once in a while I tell her no, even when I have the money and want to see her, just so she doesn't take it for granted. If any human beings are reading, what do you do?

"She wasted 16k last month. Usually its like 3 to 5." Kick her to the curb.

Stripping is an addiction. They love the attention and the money. Age cures the addiction because the attention and money degenerates, unless they have other addictions to support . . . then they just keep trying to be a stripper . . .

You need to pull the splinter out fast, don't let it cause an infection.

" . . . she's in it for the money. You've got to slow it down somehow if you want her sticking around" This isn't bad advice, but I think better advice is to see girls on occasion that are more open about being in it for the money.

You're better off with a dancer you see on occasion and it's clear that she's there because you paid her. There can be a mutual respect, but having the arrangement out in the open makes it manageable. Even with the arrangement out in the open, make sure you tell the girl no every once in a while. Expect her not to see you that time, which is fine, but it's important she understands that you can and will say no. Seeing civilians at the same time helps. The one you have now does not seem worth the while. If it were me I'd tell her goodbye, then take a break from clubbing until you've funded your retirement accounts and build up some reserves. You say without her you'd have an extra $3,000 to $4,000 every month. Great, throw $1,000 into savings each month, and the remaining $2,000 to $3,000 is plenty to club on . If you want real relationship have one with a responsible civilian. You'll be better off in the long run.

I took a friend who rarely goes to strip clubs out one night. I'm always patient at clubs and wait for girls who are really my style, but was interested in seeing how my friend would go about it, given his lack of experience. He saddled right up to one of the older dancers, talked to her for a really long time, and then only bought a couple dances from her. On the way home he asked me to stop by an ATM. I said "Sure, but why". He said he needed to get some money out before the girl comes over. I was a bit surprised, and was like, "Why her?" He told me she was older and wasn't making as much money as the other girls, so he figured that's where his chances were the best. While I see the merits of his approach, I wouldn't have let the woman pay me for OTC, and I never bring girls back to my home. I scored some numbers that night from some really nice looking girls, but they all turned into "Come see me at the club again" type texts, nothing more. While I enjoy this thread, I think it's important to distinguish between the % of girls doing high/low volume extras right now, and the % of girls who will do high/low volume extras at some point in their career.

"I think these lower volume girls are just more resistant to do P4P in general, regardless of pricing and need other variables to be met." That has been my experience as well.

I think it varies by region. If it's an area where all of the girls do extras then a girl won't make any money unless she does extras too. If extras aren't as readily available, then you're getting down to how bad she needs the money, or perhaps some are just really selective about which customers they'll entertain. I have no desire to sleep with whores. I prefer a girl who's selective. It's cleaner, safer, and I feel better about myself afterwards.

This is why I no longer fuck virgins. It's too damn expensive. If I can find a civilian close to my own age and she's still a virgin then there must be something seriously wrong with her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDzn04r0LTQ

Nope, I don't feel like a John at all.

"I’m unsure if you find her SS insulting or concerning?" I am too. If I can take what she said at face value, then it's concerning (for her) even though it was meant to be a complement (to me). If it's a false complement intended to get me to keep spending then it was unnecessary and insulting. "If you are concerned that she’s getting into some bad shit, it’s very difficult to guide her away from a downward spiral. She needs to find her own way out." This is (possibly) true about her too, but completely unrelated to my post. I can tell she lies to me about it, but she's entitled to her private life and this aspect of her isn't any of my business, so nothing held against her there. I can tell she uses significantly less of it than I did at her age, and I didn't make stripper money when I was in my twenties, so I can't imagine that it's causing a significant financial burden. But unlike her, I'm aware of how slowly and unnoticeable the long term effect creeps up on you, and then you're really depressed. But it doesn't really cause much physical withdrawal, so still relatively easy to quit, unless you're making stripper money and constantly surrounded by it. So I realize that there's nothing I can do to change the situation as far as that's concerned. If she keeps laying it on “Oh baby, I’m so wet for you!” - that type of shit - then maybe it’s best to move on. It's always so much sweeter and more believable than “Oh baby, I’m so wet for you!”. I think I'd be more comfortable and less on my guard with “Oh baby, I’m so wet for you!” - those girls are a dime a dozen. This one's a diamond in the rough, when she's gone she's gone, so I kind of feel like I have to enjoy it now, even though it's changing.

"She probably likes the way your money and your time makes her feel." I think she does. Redeeming qualities aside (not to suggest I don't have any), I think she extracts enjoyment from being picked over the other girls, and she especially enjoys the fact that my appreciation for her over the other girls can be measured in monetary terms. I consistently do this for her. I think it would be better if she just came out and said it that way, but then she'd probably feel like a whore.

Papi_Chulo - I appreciate your thoughtful response. I have no expectation (nor desire) for a real relationship with a stripper. I guess my point is if she understands that I prefer her over other girls and knows that I'm going to continue spending on her, then why the fake shit? What I liked about her in the first place was the lack of fake shit. She just hung out, acted like herself, and I compensated her for it. She's not going to get anymore $ out of me with it. And if it's just a move to keep me around longer, it's backfiring, because it's making me give serious thought into moving on. I think what I'm experiencing is the way that the industry has changed her over time, and I find it unattractive. So on the other hand, if I do move on my expectations are that I'll just find more of the same elsewhere . . . . but perhaps in a slightly less attractive and significantly less reliable package. Call.Me.Ishmael - I like your response. Unfortunately, there's too much alcohol involved for the point to register. DandyDan - I'm feeling what you say. To an extent, I'm cool with be taken for granted. It's a strip club. I don't go there club looking for honesty. With this one just knowing that she prefers me over the other customers is enough. And that's how it's been for a really long time. She's definitely not driving things in a real relationship direction (or even driving them in a facade of a real relationship direction). That level of "honesty" is still there. But her recent actions imply an emotional attachment on her end, which not only isn't what I'm looking for, but it's a level of SS that isn't required to keep me around. At the risk of being laughed off the board, I'll say that with this one it's conceivable that there's some truth behind what she's saying, and if that's the case, then I think it's unhealthy. Other than this, she exceeds all of the other girls, so I'm tempted to just ignore it and continue (for the foreseeable future). Nothing is ever going to be perfect. But I liked things better the way they were before. twentyfive - don't worry, I have a perfectly healthy civilian life.

I find this an incredible turnoff. It kills the experience. If seen it happen a few times, both with boyfriends and what i assume to be a sugar daddy, and every time it's the best looking girl there, and every time I chose get dances from a less attractive girl. But to answer your question, since the girls were f'n gorgeous it didn't seem to ruin their sales. The other customers didn't seem to care.

There's some really good advice here. A couple other approaches I've had luck with, though: If she seems comfortable with you at the club but comes across like she's never done OTC, tell here just dinner the first time is fine, and if she wants to get together a second time then you'll take her to a hotel that has a bar and a restaurant in it. You might end up wasting money on a dinner that leads nowhere, but it gives you a chance to score with a cutie who doesn't whore around. When you get dances have enough money in your pocket that she can feel a bulge there too, but don't spend it all on her. In addition to their safety, girls are seriously concerned about getting ripped off. Let her know you have money (in cash) without spending more on her than you have to. The fact that she felt it in your pocket rather than you just offering it will make her feel like less of a whore, too. If you get her number but she doesn't text you back, don't treat it like a big deal the next time you see her at the club. You're competing with other customers to make her feel more comfortable with you. And that's a really low bar for you to hurdle. When she does hand out her number, a lot of guys will text her compulsively until she has to block them. It's easy to stand out from these guys. You won't score instantly with that this approach, but knowing you won't get too clingy with her (through experience) can help a lot. Don't think of rejection as rejection. Think of it as an opportunity to set yourself apart from the other butt hurt customers who get ticked off by rejection. You don't have to come back to the club just to see her, but don't ignore her when you do. Making her feel comfortable is a process, and you're allowed to play the field while you do it.

I think everyone experiences their own personal golden age at the strip club. It will occur after you've been doing it long enough that you know how to get your money's worth without being taken advantage of, but before you've been doing it long enough that you start asking yourself why you keep giving money to girls that don't give a shit about you. You can still have a lot of fun after your golden age is over, but you'll be more selective when it comes to selecting a girl worth giving your money to.

two_bits - I'm on the same course as you. I plan to spend Friday afternoon sipping wine with my sugar baby, then it's off to a resort with my beautiful girlfriend. I'll keep an eye out for a distinguished man wearing a back brace . . . and send a complimentary bottle of wine over should I spot one.

I would skip the NFL to do my grocery shopping, and clubbing is on a whole different level.

If a girl doesn't want to be touched then the customer should respect that boundary. Just because they are working doesn't mean they have to cater to every customer. There are lawyers who won't take on certain clients, and strippers should have the same option. As a customer, I'm not going to keep spending money on a girl who doesn't leave me satisfied, just as I wouldn't hire a layer who can't win my case. It goes both ways.

All the time.

Your previous discussion leads me to believe that you find her irritating and don't care to make it a long-term thing. I vote you take advantage of the situation and get as low a price as you can. The only time i offer more than I have to is when I'm really into the girl and want her to keep coming back. I don't view it as paying extra for that encounter. I view it as paying extra so that next time she'll stop what she's doing and schedule her day around my availability. I get the sense that you neither want nor require that form of dedication from this girl. So don't give her a penny more than you have to.

It depends on how hard it is to get her out of the club. If she seems hesitant, takes time to feel comfortable with me first, and then has no idea how much to ask for, I make it a point to treat her right, and I'll keep coming back as long as she continues to show me a good time. Girls like this get a lot of respect from me. If she comes across like she'd leave the club with anyone, I may decide to have a good time with her, but I'll move on pretty quickly. I still treat these girls with respect, but not as much as the girls described above. If they pull shady shit I laugh at them, say something like "Is that all the money you thought you could get out of me, wow you must have low self-esteem" and then I come back to the club for no other purpose than to spend money on other girls in front of them. I might tip her a couple singles on stage before calling her a whore.

"I've been in a very similar position to what you describe a few times. I've learned my lesson and am trying to pass that along. Save yourself some heartache and $$$. It's not worth it." That's so sad flagooner. Instead of just having fun with the girl and accepting it for what it is she taught you a lesson. And you didn't even learn the lesson the first time around, huh. You had to be in the position a few times, as you say, before you learned your lesson. Really, it's quite sad. Just like the VIP room, with OTC you pay per experience, and when the time is up it's up. If it's good I'll keep buying more, but I still understand that I'm paying per experience and there is no requirement for the experiences to continue indefinitely. I'll tip for good service in VIP and for this one I'd like to do something nice for the good service I've received OTC. Is that such a crime? When this girl moves on there will be plenty more waiting at the strip club. Whether or not I go above and beyond for any of them will depend on whether or not they go above and beyond for me. For those of you capable of providing a serious response without projecting your own misfortune and inability to maintain your mental clarity around 20-year-olds walking around in their underwear and hustling for tips (ie., not flagooner), I sincerely thank you.