How do you keep a woman from spending all your money?
Icey
I put your ATF on a winning team
Say you're with someone who spends so much money there's no way in hell you can ever save anything. Its so much money that it makes you stressed out and physically sick sometimes.
I had to start moving weight to make ends meet. When I was single, I was making enough from my investments to not have to worry about shit really.
I had to start moving weight to make ends meet. When I was single, I was making enough from my investments to not have to worry about shit really.
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion
63 comments
If you are not the sole breadwinner and she is spending her own money, then you're SOL. I guess you'll just have to earn more to pay the bills that she's not covering from her end or reduce whatever spending you can control. If your efforts are not enough, then you'll have to get rid of her or go into the soup with her.
Of course, either way you could end up pissing her off and she may leave of her own accord. Problem solved.
I don't know how to say no to her. Ive told her I don't have any more money but she never believes me. She is very hard to say no to, I just look at her and...........
It only gets really bad if you take it personally, see the present condition as one of personal failing. If you go that way, then all sanity is lost.
As far as the woman spending money, if she is your partner, then she has to keep it within bounds and sign on to broader shared objectives.
FWIW, in the organization I am building no one will ever have to worry about any such things.
SJG
It ain't the end of the world. She'll be doing you a favor if she left! You'll save money for other things
Vantablack, I love her, there are too many vested feelings. She's a dancer.
You don’t buy your main girl a BMW when you are a young couple - then buy her a Kia a few years later. You want to start low - and increase her lifestyle. If you peak in the early months - she won’t enjoy the downgrades. That’s when girls start looking around. She will see a dude in a sweet Mercedes or Maserati - and she will start spreading for him - as he is an upgrade.
You need to think about the future - and your ability to earn more. Women will run through your money so fast - it’s unbelievable!
And ATACDawg is right, she's in it for the money. You've got to slow it down somehow if you want her sticking around
The one you have now does not seem worth the while. If it were me I'd tell her goodbye, then take a break from clubbing until you've funded your retirement accounts and build up some reserves.
You say without her you'd have an extra $3,000 to $4,000 every month. Great, throw $1,000 into savings each month, and the remaining $2,000 to $3,000 is plenty to club on . If you want real relationship have one with a responsible civilian. You'll be better off in the long run.
But she still does not understand this. She saw marriage as two people submitting to outside norms. I saw marriage as a partnership.
I learned how to stand up to negative situations in the work place. But in my own personal life, no that is impossible. Partnership is not optional.
SJG
Universe 1971 (FULL ALBUM) [Hard | Blues Rock]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kSma2pg…
Imagining Life After Capitalism
What can Star Trek tell us about life after capitalism? Peter Frase discusses four possible futures in a world where workers are increasingly being replaced by machines — ranging from communist and socialist societies to ones in which workers are literally disposable. (Encore presentation.) Resources: Peter Frase, Four Futures: Life After Capitalism Verso, 2014
https://kpfa.org/episode/against-the-gra…
https://www.amazon.com/kindle-dbs/entity…
http://www.peterfrase.com/
This isn't bad advice, but I think better advice is to see girls on occasion that are more open about being in it for the money.
san_jose_guy - commonly referred to as SJG this forum member is usually mocked or ignored, his comments should NOT be taken in any way as legitimate
Phatboy99 - definite troll account
Vantablack - possible troll account
SJG
2. You don't pay any of her bills or debts out of your wallet unless you offer to do so out of the kindness of your heart. No car payment, no electricity, no clothing, unless YOU decide you want to do that for her. A girlfriend is not entitled to anything and if she feels entitled, she will bleed you dry and leave, or she'll never, ever have enough from you especially if you move on to marriage. Either way, an entitled attitude (selfishness by either party) will always end up with a broken relationship.
3. She should not have access to any of your money through bank accounts or credit cards. The only money of yours she should have is that cash which you hand to her personally out of your own volition. She doesn't get to use your debit card at the ATM or your credit cards to go shopping without you. If she wants clothes, either give her some cash or take her shopping but you set the budget and you pay at the store. If this offends her or she withholds affection, end it right then and there, as it will only get worse the longer your relationship lasts.
4. No system is gamed against you. You are responsible for your relationship and your money. If you feel like you need to let her spend all your money just to get good sex, she'll never have enough to spend and you'll always feel like a slave to her habits. You'll never feel like a man in a relationship like this and you'll have nobody to blame but yourself for your misery.
Having an entitled deadbeat girlfriend is no different than a stripper's deadbeat boyfriend--and we hate the latter here on TUSCL. Why would you accept it with a woman?
1. Men like to build careers where the work they do is seen as having intrinsic value. And though they would like to be paid as much as possible, this intrinsic value is sacrosanct and always out ranks the money.
2. Women see such thinking in men a frivolous and unrealistic and so they see men's work as something which is obligatory and not having any value beyond this and the income produced. Women see their own incomes as proof of social status, and not needing to have any intrinsic value.
Need I say more? How could I?
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/038072…
SJG
https://jacobinmag.com/
san_jose_guy - commonly referred to as SJG this forum member is usually mocked or ignored, his comments should NOT be taken in any way as legitimate
Its not really about lifestyle. We can keep up a great lifestyle. The problem is just buying expensive crap. To be fair, a lot of it is shit for our place and she buys me lots of stuff. Its not all just about her. I just want to save money.
Kick her to the curb.
OT: 16k/month, un-banked... that sounds legal.
I think there is built in tension between men and women, and at the risk of stirring up a hornet's nest I will try to characterize some of it:
1. Men like to build careers where the work they do is seen as having intrinsic value. And though they would like to be paid as much as possible, this intrinsic value is sacrosanct and always out ranks the money.
2. Women see such thinking in men a frivolous and unrealistic and so they see men's work as something which is obligatory and not having any value beyond this and the income produced. Women see their own incomes as proof of social status, and not needing to have any intrinsic value.
Need I say more? How could I?
SJG
san_jose_guy - commonly referred to as SJG this forum member is usually mocked or ignored, his comments should NOT be taken in any way as legitimate
Phatboy99 - definite troll account
Vantablack - possible troll account
SJG, you're right.
DC9428, thats the hard part. Its just her and the way she is. The way she looks at me, makes me feel. Ive said no before and shes fine with it but sometimes I just feel like I cant coz I love her so much. If that makes sense.
FWIW, the organization I am building is to be the alternative.
SJG
And if you deal with them at that level, their capacity to spend money knows no bounds.
Repost:
I think there is built in tension between men and women, and at the risk of stirring up a hornet's nest I will try to characterize some of it:
1. Men like to build careers where the work they do is seen as having intrinsic value. And though they would like to be paid as much as possible, this intrinsic value is sacrosanct and always out ranks the money.
2. Women see such thinking in men a frivolous and unrealistic and so they see men's work as something which is obligatory and not having any value beyond this and the income produced. Women see their own incomes as proof of social status, and not needing to have any intrinsic value.
Need I say more? How could I?
SJG
There is something broken about the relationship when it is like that. Its not just that women and men are different, there is something seriously wrong.
SJG
san_jose_guy - commonly referred to as SJG this forum member is usually mocked or ignored, his comments should NOT be taken in any way as legitimate
Phatboy99 - definite troll account
SJG
You need to step back, take a look at the relationship you’ve got going, and determine if you can realistically keep up with this cash flow over the long term. Her spending won’t decrease -
You know what to do. Good luck.
If you front-room DATY her, you will soften her up and can eat semen fresh from her vajajay.
SaltyNutz - She's on par with bitches I fuck. I love her for her personality and character not just her looks. And Im not a loser. If I were a loser I wouldn't be spending my adult life dating hot strippers.
Stripfighter, what do you mean?
There are two choices here.
1. Grow a set and put a stop to it, even at the risk of losing her, or
2. Shut up, continue taking it like the bitch that you are and deal with the consequences when you owe others.
Simple. And you're welcome. ;)
--
mark94
Arizona
February 8, 2018
Four lessons from the Wealthy Barber
1. You have to remove temptation triggers
2. Credit cards are evil, even if you don't carry a balance
3. You can't have everything you want
4. Save when the saving's good
--
Dominic77
Northeast Ohio
February 12, 2018
The next step I’ve been taking is to look at removing temptation triggers, like @mark94 posted. That’s actually been pretty useful. I got the savings up, essentially doubled now. I was going to post the exact figure, but then @cashman1234 reminded me about me hyper focusing on details. And he’s right!
Temptation triggers, stress, learning to be uncomfortable (esp. around the Mrs) when she’s compelled to want to spend. I just keep a clear head and and let nothing, absolutely nothing, bother me and stay calm. The old, “put her in a box and sit on her.” I just had to use my own advice again. It’s just uncomfortable for a single day, I tough it out, then it’s fine the next. Repeat.
--
https://www.tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=…
Mark94 +10
Unfortunately though, Wealthy Barber is not really compatible with strip clubs. But it is compatible with about the best which can be had of marriage.
SJG