discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"But in a strip club everything is fair game. Just be cool about it. Relax. That's why we're there in the first place. Have fun."
I don't think you have to tell us that -- most of the people who responded here didn't seem very concerned if another customer approached their stripper; annoyed, maybe, but no big deal. But it might not be us who you have to worry about. Men are at their worst where sex, alcohol, and ego mix. Here's a true story I heard from a former ATF. She and another stripper went to Vegas with stripper #2's brother, to celebrate brother's birthday with him. They went to a strip club together, all as customers, so the girls basically just look like hot partygirl civilians. At one point brother is at stage tipping, and some other customers start buying the two girls drinks, and the girls join those guys at their table, they are drinking together and having fun. Eventually, brother wanders back, sees his sister and her friend at the other customers' table, wanders over to talk to them. One of the other customers is not happy -- without stopping to hear any explanation, he pops the brother, who ends up with a broken jaw. Just like that. Now, I heard all of this second-hand, so don't know details; I can guess that the brother thought he'd walk over, say his to his sister, explain that he was her brother not a competing customer, and that would be that -- instead, he got his jaw wired shut for a while, from a drunk guy who was not in a mindset to listen to any explanation as to why the brother approached that table and talked to "their" girls.
Anyway, as I said, if you read all the signs correctly, *and* you have the personality and charm to disarm even a hostile customer, perhaps you'll mostly get lucky and not run into a break-jaws-and-ask-questions-later type. Or maybe someday you will, I dunno. But for me, "Relax... have fun" means not doing anything that could fuck up my good time, and I think for most of us, focusing on a stripper who is with a customer rather than finding a different stripper, using a staff intermediary, or just catching her when she's on stage or otherwise disengaged from the customer, is just not the right play.
discussion comment
6 years ago
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Papi_ChuloMiami, FL (or the nearest big-booty club)
Yeah, there's a "new PL mistakes" factor here, but more importantly, there's an intimidation factor here. It was clear he was suspicious and unhappy the whole way, but he gave in. That a violation of "Don't be a little bitch", not a new PL thing.
-->"She said that it was three songs and I better take care of her. I asked what the house fee is - in other words, what of the $90 for three songs does she get. "
That's a part that puzzles me. Why in the world would you ask what her house fee is -- that's between her and the house, and if the house takes a lot of it, that's her fucking problem, not mine; the price is the price, we don't adjust mid- or post-dance due to what her house fee is (whether it's her actual house fee, or she lies about it -- either way, I don't care). That part, I suppose, is part newbie PL mistake ... but again, I suspect the reason he asked in the first place was that he was lost and intimidated and hoping to use the answer for leverage
discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"It may seem fun in the beginning but it seems you get dragged in. It can literally make or break you. The endless pitfalls, getting obsessed with a dancer, using her as a replacement for a civi, all roads to bad ruin...Yet it’s hard to break and go cold turkey, so here we are..."
I would guess most of us have made a dumb mistake falling for a stripper. That said, I would also guess that most of the old-timers here have learned their lesson and don't fall into that particular pitfall anymore. My lesson came as the result of a confluence of factors for me: at the same time I started going through a divorce (so was at maximum vulnerability) I changed my SCing M.O. from "variety-based extras" to "ATF-based socializing"... that was a rough year. But it was many years ago and I have not remotely fallen for it since, nor do I feel I will again. I think if I continued to "get obsessed with a dancer" over and over again, I'd likely have quit SCing and just stuck with FBSM and backpage-like arrangements.
Anyway, short way to say: yes, there are things to look out for, but most are just little potholes -- this stripper didn't provide as much mileage as she said she would, that stripper didn't show up to our OTC. But getting obsessed with a stripper is not a pothole, it's a potentially life-altering sinkhole. I get it if you fall into one ONCE. But you'd better make changes to ensure you don't fall into a second one, and if you do, time to re-think whether there are alternatives for you. Just too fucking dangerous financially & emotionally otherwise.
discussion comment
6 years ago
justme: my strong counsel would be not to ask. She's with another customer, just stay away and find another girl ... or catch her when she's broken away, walking to the bathroom, or on stage maybe. It's not a good idea, it's a bad idea that OP is getting away with
discussion comment
6 years ago
As the guy who is the regular who bogarts a stripper for a few hours straight, it usually doesn't bother me if another PL tries to get her. Hell, I don't blame him, I have good taste! lol ... on the other hand, I tend to agree with PaulDrake, the fact that you haven't gotten into any trouble yet, doesn't mean it's a good idea. On the OTHER other hand, I think it's all about how you handle it and ask. It sounds like you keep it light and come of respectfully, as if you're asking the customer, I have to imagine that defuses most bad feelings before they start. I think it takes the minimum RDA of personality and charm to come off that non-threatening -- not everyone reading this might be able to pull that off.
discussion comment
6 years ago
^^^ Exactly. I think as long as you have mixed ratings of two completely separate attributes ("Attractiveness/Friendliness") -- or worse yet, mixed ratings where people aren't sure how to interpret one of them -- you're going to end up with practically meaningless ratings. Yes, it's all subjective in the end anyway, but at least we're all judging on the same thing, if it's just one easily-understood attribute. And attractiveness is almost certainly the universal #1 interest. Have separate categories for friendliness and mileage, *or* have people discuss those two in their review (hell, make it a guideline that they MUST address those two in the review)
discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"I don’t like the granny pantie looking bottoms girls are wearing now that come all of the way up to their waist."
I have to think that this is one of those things, like duck faces, and obsessing over their nailpolish, that girls do primary for themselves or for other girls -- they have to know that men almost universally dislike it (or in the case of fancy nails, don't care)
discussion comment
6 years ago
I think outfits make a difference to some extent or other, even to people who don't think they do. The right outfit can either really flatter her body, or push whatever kink button you might have. The wrong outfit can emphasize her flaws. There was an outfit that was popular some years back, where like a 3" piece of fabric went across their but (Kind of like boy shorts, but the backs were thinner) -- and if a girl already had a less-than-round ass, this pancaked her. As an ass man, i could not figure out how any of the girls wearing that could possibly think they looked good. Maybe it looked good from the front
discussion comment
6 years ago
I must be extra dense today, it never occurred to me that "friendliness" is about mileage. In that case, I way mis-interpreted it, and the score I gave is way off...
discussion comment
6 years ago
Yeah, I think it's a bad idea to have a rating that's based on two completely different, unrelated attributes. I had trouble figuring out what I should do for a recent review -- the girls' friendliness rating was a 9, the hotness rating was a 6. I gave them an 8, choosing to bias towards friendliness (I did mention this in the review). But frankly, I think a look purely on beauty is super important and one of the main things guys want to know -- not some weird average of beauty and friendliness. I'd make it just a beauty rating, and then add a friendliness rating if it's possible to add more ratings to the form
discussion comment
6 years ago
The way I dress going to the strip club, I pretty much breeze through any dress code I've ever heard of, so it doesn't effect me personally. To the extent I care at all, I appreciate the extent to which dress codes seem to catch thugs and homeless (at least by the looks of the guys who end up at the front desk arguing about it). Although I don't wear such things myself, I obviously have no issue with guys in sweatpants or shorts -- if anything, I respect their dedication to the PL craft :)
discussion comment
6 years ago
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lolrunedYour Friendly Neighborhood Average Guy
Best combination of:
1. Low-pressure hustle
2. Lots of complimentary socialization time
3. Stripper hotness: while quality goes up and down, especially due to slow business over the past 2 years, I can almost always find a 7.5+, and often girls in the 8s, and sometimes 9s
4. Alcohol
Occasionally the club slips enough on #3 that I have to call a no-joy and go to another club, alas
discussion comment
6 years ago
twentyfive: In this area, it is definitely far more likely that your car will get broken into, and your stuff stolen, than you get sticky-fingered by a stripper, or mugged on the way there. Always far safer to have your stuff on you. I don't think that's what most guys are worried about though: it's that many people don't have the self-control to be in a strip club with their credit card and ATM card, and not overspend their budget. Luckily, my Cheap bone is veinier and girthier than my Bone bone, so I don't have this issue, I can even bring in extra cash, get drunk, and still not overspend. But I don't begrudge someone with a small flaccid Cheap bone, to do what he needs to do to stay on budget.
discussion comment
6 years ago
9... Lapdances at the clubs I go to are pretty useless. VIPs only
discussion comment
6 years ago
gmd: Ya, I give it to the stripper at the end, too. They cost like $10 each on the interwebs, so it's a marginal extra cost to my typical $300 trip
discussion comment
6 years ago
I'll third Papi Choochoo's reply.
The first question here is, what do YOU want from this particular sex worker? If you're fine paying $$$ for dances in your house, well, who am I to judge? I can't remotely understand what the point of that would be, but if it's your thing, you gotta be you. On the other hand, if what you really want is extras -- and the fact that you're asking about it, means it sounds like you're sure hoping to get some. Which I get, I'd have zero interest in having a stripper over to my house if sex wasn't involved.
Here's something to note: there's nothing disrespectful about asking a sex worker for sex -- especially a stripper who proposes to go to your house. Of course, if you're an asshole, THEN it might be disrespectful. "Hey, whore, how 'bout $50 to give me a rusty trombone?", THAT is disrespectful. "I'd be interested in private dances at my house if we could do more there than here. I have something specific in mind -- can we talk about it?" is not at all disrespectful, and when she replies, "sure, what do you have in mind?" she's now given you consent to ask for what you want -- respectfully. Alternatively, she might say, "I don't do that", in which case, it's time to find a new stripper.
Negotiation-wise, I ALWAYS name the first price. Some guys do it the opposite way, but I like to take control of the negotiation from the get-go, with an offer that's slightly below what I'm willing to pay. Some guys like doing it the other way. Whatevs.
Of course, all this begs the question: You met her ONCE, and you're going to have her over your house now? Are you totally sure you aren't going to wake up in the tub, missing a kidney? Be careful, man. No fucking way I'd let a stripper I'd met once or twice know where I live. At least switch to a hotel or the hot tubs
discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"I take all of my shit to da club, wallet with all of its contents, cash in various pockets, cell phone, credit cards, marijuana, etc. I’ve never had a problem with having any of it."
Yep, me too. I understand why guys who are apt to lose control and start charging things on their credit card, or have a lapse of control and either lose their wallet or get it ripped off, are better off leaving it all in the car. For me, I would never be without my cell phone, it's a safety tool I won't be without, and not only don't I lose control and overspend, but it's often very convenient to have my credit cards there in case we do a spur-of-the-moment dinner after her shift, etc, so I don't have to walk all the way back to the car first. Whatever works.
Stripfighter: ya, I get very good responses from the vibrator. BTW, using the vibrator on her is definitely one of those things where you want to get verbal permission first. I always hand it to them, still in its package, so she can open it herself and know it's brand new
discussion comment
6 years ago
BTW, I don't think bringing your full wallet to the club is a mistake (obviously). I do think it's a mistake to have anything but what I mentioned, in your regular wallet, why carry around all that crap? I realize some guys, if they have a credit card or ATM card, they might lose control and over-spend; I never do that, so not a threat.
discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"It looks like Subraman is the boyscout of strip clubs. Seriously, a micro vibrator?"
You haven't put a vibrator on your ATF's clit? It can be a lot of fun! And better yet, not hard to hide where your hand is, from the cameras :)
discussion comment
6 years ago
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founderslip a dollar in her g-string for me
FTS: love your ideas, it's time tuscl offered strip club analytics for the masses! lol ... I'm joking, but I do find the things you mentioned useful, and with those as examples, I can think of other interesting ways to slice & dice this info as well. BTW, I also wonder if offering analytics and trending to strip clubs who advertise on tuscl, would bring in more advertisers?
For me, at least, it still doesn't address BJ's exactly question: will it get a review-VIP to also become a pay-VIP? For me, while I find the info interesting, I don't think I'd pay extra for it. But I tell you what I would do:
- If a single review got me a free VIP, but it took a 2nd review within 30 days to get the strip club analytics, I'd definitely do the 2nd review
- If I were on the fence about paying to become a VIP, maybe this would help tip me over
discussion comment
6 years ago
I don't, but my MO is the opposite of yours. My regular wallet contains exactly: My driver's license, visa card, atm card, medical insurance card, AAA card, and cash. And I want every one of those things with me on my trip to the club, and in the club, so I keep my wallet on me. I do have a little separate pouch I drop in my jacket pocket, that contains my "strip club trip" essentials: trial-sized bottle of purell, tiny tin of mints, wad of singles, pair of extra-compact glasses (in case I lose my main glasses in the club), and sometimes a micro-sized vibrator
discussion comment
6 years ago
BTW, I do think "girls who don't want your money" is the most butthurt, violation of rule #2 (don't be a little bitch) way of thinking about this. I just don't see how you can enjoy the SC if you take everything as a personal insult. Speaking generically, when a girl does this, it's just a girl who made a business decision for herself, almost certainly not personal towards you, right? I mean, I do think strippers sometimes have a personal reason for not dancing for you, but no reason to think that was the case here
discussion comment
6 years ago
-->"Finally I decided I would take matters into my own hands. After her fourth stageset I asked her if I could get some dances. She said she was talking to another customer, so not now. She called her friend over to enertain me in the meantime"
When I'm with my ATF, I'm the "another customer" ... and, contrary to some of the advice you're getting above, I once saw a guy tip her $100 at the stage and ask her for dances, and she came back to me anyway. The most I ever do when I'm the customer hoping to get a girl, is to catch her on stage and tell her "if you're not with another customer, I'm interested in dances"... and if she says she IS with another customer, I just move on and plan to catch her another day (apropos our "do you talk to staff" thread, I'll sometimes text the manager or bouncer to see if she's in, for next time). I don't think dropping big $ at stage is a good investment -- a girl with an appointment with her best regular, is not going to give up a steady $400 weekly (or whatever), just because a guy who might be a transient PL gives her $20 at stage; why throw away the money. Just tell her, you're interested in dances, and that's that.
Of course, this is the perspective from a guy who specializes in trying to find the slowest, low-hustle dayshifts. I realize this might not work as well at a busy nightshift, but nevertheless, it's the same process I follow on busy nightshift, too
discussion comment
6 years ago
The "spend something, so the other girls know you're spending and should approach" thing is always weird to me, since that isn't a problem I end up running into, at least in the clubs I usually go to. Enough guys complain about "how do I get the strippers' attention" that I know it's a thing, though