Thinking of quitting

Just to clarify about this girl. She was hot to me 7/10. And I was extremely horny when we were in the private room and I thought mistakenly "I'm already here, might as well" thinking she was gonna be sweet and erotic like the past experiences at that particular spot (not cafe Atlantis btw). Tldr at the blood was in my other head and I fucking kick myself for being a moron simp. Honestly idk why I treat these whores with respect when they blatantly spit on me.

It is that dreaded word. Some will tell you saying/thinking that word proves you’re alive. In some historíes, speaking that word would see you arrested, maybe even executed.
That amazing yet possibly dreaded word is “why”. But is asking/wondering “why” always a good thing? Let’s look at one hypothesis. We will use regular visits to Strip Clubs.
Hypothesis Question: “Why” do I go to strip clubs?
Data to consider before answering “Why”:
-the girls are exclusively motivated by being paid for their time.
-their job is to get the biggest payment out of each and every customer
-this is mostly done via ‘hustle’(a savvy ruse).
-they very likely don’t care if you fall of the end of the earth, just pay them as much as possible before you fall.
-it is likely to cost quite a lot of money
-given the job and the industry, and the data points above, expectations should be hard set accordingly.
-given the industry, “decent!” — gasp — Society thinks patrons and the dancers are morally depraved. (You’re bad! Just bad!)
-working under the auspice of the points of data above: you now go to a SC to presumably sate visual, proximal, sexual needs (I.e. to see, be near, get sexual touching at [variable]).

Alright! So now we get to it: “why” do you go?
Best answer: never!! ask why. Deep social/mental chasms await if you do
Next best answer: why? Then realize the other bullet points, accept it, the last bullet point is why I go. It’s that simple.
Worst answer: Asking why, why, why Right after a SC visit major strikeout that has left you unfulfilled.
I don’t have a lot of experience but here’s my advice:
-angrily saying “those bitches don’t care!” Is comical. Yet Knowing that is very important., meaning knowing it is 100% the deal. If you can’t accept that, imho time to stop.
-yiu have a SC routine, it isn’t giving you the thrill anymore. What do you do? Maybe Time to alter the routine. Different places, Take slower time, observe more, be choosy, spend more wisely. Otherwise I’d suggest switching to free porn vids on the internet.

BOL



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You’ve had a few less than stellar to outright sucky outings.

Everyone takes breaks. Some longer than others. Some permanently. If it's not fun anymore, then stop.

If it’s not fun and/or costs more than you can’t afford, you are right not to go. If you feel awful after going, don’t go and expect a different and result. If it’s novelty you’re seeking, take a break and test it after a few weeks or months or longer. If it still doesn’t work, don’t go back. No shame in that.

You're seeking validation by posting on a website for strip club customers. That's rock bottom. Is this LarryFisherman?

I second what Ishmael said.

Looking at your short history of discussions created, you’re not in the correct head space to be clubbing. A break is good for you considering the topics you’re dwelling on. Wait until you can focus on some of the quality aspects of other variables in your life, and when you’re secure in those (career and relationships), that’ll give you perspective on where this hobby fits in a normal
Productive life. Come back clubbing when you don’t need it, and you’ll enjoy it.

I went twice this week. So I am thinking of quitting too. Until next week.

@OP, most of us have some manner of love/hate relationship with strip clubs.
But we'll all agree on if you're having a shit time, or feeling like a loser on the drive home, don't go.

It's not complicated, if it's not fun or leaves you feeling bad afterwords, stop doing it.

Don't ask a bunch of people who obviously like doing it what you should do.

Most guys never go to strip clubs. When I was fifty, I had only been a couple times in my life with friends. What changed for me was that I no longer found women the same age as me sexually attractive. I'm an extreme introvert and never liked living with someone but was willing to do it at a younger age when an attractive young female was available and interested.

Once I decided I was only interested in younger women, strip clubs became the best option. I understand your complaints because I often feel the same way. I have just enough good experiences, though, to keep going. I have been cutting back on visits recently. It's getting a little boring and there has been a big decline in local strip clubs. Also, my wage increases are not keeping up with inflation. This is a problem now for almost everyone and almost everyone is having to cut back on spending in some areas.

https://tuscl.net/article/58034

1. They'll say anything to separate you from your money, but it still might be worth it.
2. She might like you as a person, but she doesn’t love you. This is her way of paying the bills. You. Are. A. Customer.
97. Set a strip club budget for the MONTH, not the day or the week. This will keep you from spending too much on one day, but leave you room for one boffo trip.
101. If you think you have a problem with strip clubs, you have a problem. Don’t let the hobby consume your life. Set moral and financial boundaries.
106. There are months you will want to club your ass off, and others you will want to take a break. This is natural.
107. Once clubbing becomes your “default” activity as a certain time, it may be time to mix it up.
108. Strip clubbing shouldn’t be your top hobby. Exercise (every man who is physically able should lift heavy weights), read, play a sport. Be a monger, not a PL.
109. Strip clubbing is best when you’re already enjoying life.
110. Per the last item, strip clubbing when you’re depressed or need to escape is a great way to become addicted. It stops being fun when it feels compulsive.

The man who knows himself is wise. You’ve figured out that it’s time to stop, and that is a good first step toward whatever comes next for you. Most people never get this far, so look on the bright side, you are ahead of the game.

As an added bonus, there is nothing stopping you from posting on tuscl even if you don’t go to clubs anymore. Many here don’t.

Have a better weekend!

OP = troll

Blow a load - quit strip clubbing. Get a hangover - quit drinking. Until the next time with both.

Thanks for the mixed responses. I read every one till now. I realize many of the experiences are different. For me I had several back-to-back bad experiences in stripclubs mixed with my life right now, I wanted to vent. I decided taking a small break and trying a new spot might help. I will set a budget, I wont tolerate any bitch behavior, and I'll take my time. If again my experience is poor, I will give up on this hobby/vice and go about my life. Thanks guys

^ Don't like your own posts. You'll go blind.

Strip clubs are best avoided when depressed or desperate. Confidence is critical when you go to clubs; otherwise you risk being subjected to wallet drain for any attention given to you.

One sign of addiction is regret. You've noticed the sign, so I recommend stopping cold turkey.

what dolfan said

You got to do what's best for you. If it ain't getting you hyped anymore then it's best to quit. I actually understand where you are coming from.

But for me in my mid 40s you're looked at as an ATM where you go to strip clubs or not. For me it's more then strippers. I like watching sports there then a sports bar.
I have a budget. I'm definitely got the spending under control.

I never feel like shit afterwards because it a transactional thing not emotional

This is an interesting post, and thank you for sharing these feelings with us. I have some thoughts on the matter, including important questions to frame where you are.
Some may be Echoes from some of the above points.
1) Are you married? Kids? Friends/social life? Strip clubs have always been a great thing for me, but only because all of the above are a yes. My marriage is okay, but not great (as most, though not all of course). Our sex life isn't great either (again, as most almost-50 year olds who have been married for over 20 years. But I have a great relationship with my kids, i'm an excellent father. And I have good longterm friends. For these reasons, strip clubs are great for me. It's an escape. An escape where I can be someone else for a little bit. I think if I were single, no kids, no good friends - this habit would be depressing for me.
2) What is your inner mental state these days? If you're suffering from a little depression, everything, even hot girls dancing on you may appear a little dimmer. This may need to be addressed.
3) Sometimes I go through phases where my sex drive is a little less than other times. I don't why, it just is. Maybe this is a factor?
4) How old are you? I do wonder if at some age it happens to all of us. I mean being about 50, I'm definitely less into it a little than when I was say 35. Of course the novelty goes down a bit. But also some overall sex drive (testoterone etc) goes down too. I'm no young buck anymore. How will I feel about the hobby when I'm 60? 65?

Ultimately, it's been such a great thing in my life. I've loved it. But a part of me wonders. The time and money that went into it over the past couple of decades - if it went into it something else - I wonder what experiences I may have had. Closer relationships with some friends/family? Who knows, but we can't overthing too much. Honestly, overall, no regrets on this habit.

Myoman hit on a key point. He essentially asked if the rest of your life is satisfactory. He specially asked about wife/kids/friends, but I'll expand on that a bit. I believe society generallly establishes happiness based on existence of spouse/children/friends. However, one doesn't need to have those things if (a) rhey don't want/need them and (b) they don't give in societal pressures.

The key point, as I see it, is that you be happy with your "regular" life before diving into your strip club life.

If you resort to setup clubs to obtain happiness/fill gaps, you will create a mess for yourself. I believe one reason married guys do better with strip clubs is that we don't go to strip clubs looking for a dating partner. Meanwhile, if one is unhappily single, one may view clubs as a source of dating partners...which we know is a terrible idea. Check your feelings at the door of the club, and you will have a blast.....if you allow your feelings/emptiness to creep into the club, ur will be a very depressing experience.

That is well-said funonthaside. As your name suggests, strip clubs should be just that. For fun on the side of life. They should never be the main course of life.

I’ve enjoyed my recent strip club visits so much that I’ve only been once or twice this year. Maybe 3 if I forgot one time. I once used to visit clubs every weekend. It hasn’t been like it used to be. That was when I lived an hour away from the closestclub. Now I live 35 minutes away and rarely visit.

I splurged and tipped my Hooters waitress $4 above the normal tip. She appreciated it and thanked me. I rarely ever got a thanks in a strip club for an extra $4

It's like watching a movie. You don t stop watching movies because you don't like some of them. True, it's more of a loss when you didn't enjoy you time with a particular stripper. It works for me, because I enjoy getting dances from a dancer I like every week. Whereas I don't want to watch the same movie every week, no matter how much I like it.

I'm enjoying my trips more. But my atf came back in February so I'm sure that has a little (ok everything) to do with it. And she was gone from the club for around 3 years, so it wasn't exactly a short absence.

Take a break.

@Orion thank you. I tip very well in strip clubs to bartenders, servers and am seldomly thanked

Honestly, I have started to see escorts lately, and since then the appeal of Strip Clubs just isn't there for me. It doesn't seem all that exciting to get an erection with no guarantee of release. If I go to a strip club now it is strictly to have a drink and listen to some music. The girls are a nice addition but I don't feel like I'm missing anything if I don't get any dances.

Years ago I went to strip clubs a few times a month. I found most of the girls attractive. They were available and handsy. They were fun to be with. Dances were reasonably priced.

Now I go 3 to 4 times a year just to check out the scenery. Most of the girls are not attractive and the one or two I may find attractive are usually monopolized by a whale or by a group of other customers. Dances are expensive.

Clubs need to give me a reason to go more frequently.

As the theme of this thread has transitioned to strip clubs just not being as good anymore, I would definitely agree with that. SCs are not much better for the girls than it is for the men. The ratio is skewed to more silly men spending too much money and not enough girls. Hell, if I was a good-looking girl, I would be a stripper, rub myself over the pants on a few guys and walk out with bank. I long for the good ol' days when there were just hotter girls and more of them.

Johnny Rotten once said “if you don’t like being a rock star, stop being a rock star.” Move on, at least for awhile. Strip club life is just a game, it’s not real life. It’s for entertainment, and if you aren’t enjoying it then why do it? Yes, there will be bad experiences, ROBs, despair, etc., it’s just part of the game. If there aren’t highs to compensate for the lows, adjust your game or quit & try something or somewhere else. Clear your head & you’ll be fine.

I relate to earlier docsavage reply- I am age 76. I am not at all attracted to women anywhere near my age. I enjoy smooth skin to caress and smaller nice breasts to nicely massage. I also interact with a dancer as a person and soul not as a sex object. I also go to escorts and massage parlors (in GTA etc on trips). I have always been more interested in caring sensual intimacy for the moment, more than just the sex stuff but avoiding the US legal issues. Have been doing this for 40-some years including Thailand, the Philippines, and a few years ago in Germany (FK clubs a bit too much for my tastes).

davephy - wow, now you've got experience! I'm curious - at your age, how do the girls treat you. It is a lot different than when you were younger? Do they seem less into it? I know whatever the age, it's just an act on the dancers' part, but is it just more obvious? Also, do you have kids and even grandkids? Are you ever worried about seeing one of them or their friends at a SC. I'm beginning to worry about that as my kids get older - they are only teens now. But I'd be absolutely mortified if I see my son (or even one of his friends) at a SC!

Fuck dude. All this self loathing and self pity is just downright pathetic. Grow some fucking balls already. Go to the gym. If you already go to the gym, pump some damned iron instead of whatever sissy routines you do on the machines. Maybe take up boxing or martial arts. Just do something to find some semblance of manly pride FFS.

I'm really not trying to be an a-hole here, though I'm sure it seems that way. You're just going to the club with your head screwed on the wrong way, which is leading you to seek too much from it. A strip club is not the place to search for affirmation brother. Worse though, strippers can sense desperation and bad vibes and will treat you accordingly.

Finally, yes, playing with strippers is expensive. If the money that you're spending means as much to you as it does to her, you shouldn't be giving it to her to begin with. This is something that is supposed to be funded with purely discretionary funds. If it is cutting into other priorities, you shouldn't be doing it.

So yes, maybe take a break until you can go back with your head on straight and your budget in order.

^ Exactly. Treat strip-clubbing like gambling....discretionary funds only, and treat is solely as a fun escape, not a means to accomplish something else.

Elon Musk recently said that everything men do is a result of a primal need to get laid. If you can’t afford strip clubs, use that to motivate you to raise your income. Work out. Upgrade your wardrobe.