Stop before starting

avatar for mike710
mike710
I doubt I'm alone in this but wonder how many others have walked away from a dance that was just getting started.

I met a dancer that I shared a drink and small talk with over the course of maybe 30 minutes. She went up on stage once and I walked up and tipped her on stage. After she came back, I figured it was worth a trip to VIP. We got in back in the middle of a song so she sat on my lap topless but not really dancing.

The next song started and she proceeded to start dancing. During this time, she started laying out all of these rules. After she was finished, I said I don't think this is going to work out. I gave her money for two songs and walked away mid song.

Neither one of us got super upset but I figured she wasn't worth my time. I've done this maybe 2 or 3 times in my life when it just wasn't working for me.

Have any of you done this?

32 comments

Jump to latest
avatar for doctorevil
doctorevil
4 years ago
Why did you pay her for two songs?
avatar for doctorevil
doctorevil
4 years ago
No. I’ve never done this. I have cut off many after one dance.
avatar for mike710
mike710
4 years ago
We were in VIP for 2 songs and I wanted to err on the side of caution so that she didn't create a scene. To me an extra $20 seemed worth a seemless end to matters. I wasn't mad but didn't want to play by her rules of itemizing charges for things I didn't even ask for.

avatar for mike710
mike710
4 years ago
It wasn't a bad night after that. I had very high mileage dances with another girl I knew later on. She got what I was willing to spend on the first girl.

With a girl I don't know, I don't expect high mileage. But the first dancer came across as GPS.
avatar for Icey
Icey
4 years ago
You were upset she didn't let you manhandle her during a dance?
avatar for mike710
mike710
4 years ago
I don't expect anything. I am fine with a tame dance if I don't know the girl. I just didn't want to deal with attitude.
avatar for NAAAASTY
NAAAASTY
4 years ago
When I was cheaper and more timid we were doing a couple songs when song number 3 came on and abruptly stopped, had a dancer say that was a short song. I gave her a look that that 10 seconds wasn't a song, she didn't acknowledge nor say anything so by the time it finished told her I was only doing 3, payed and walked off before there could be any confusion w miscounts.

Looking back I could've been more assertive and backed up the -that wasn't a song look- w/ a clear verbal. Thing is she ended up becoming one of my faves. Was more of mix-up vs an annoyance or a rip off.

NAAAASTY
avatar for Icey
Icey
4 years ago
It made you upset enough to post here. You could have communicated to het what you want before the dance
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
4 years ago
If she started in the middle of the first song without asking, that wasn't two songs.

Some dancers will use the time to warm you up but not charge. Others will say they'll go into another song to make it a full song. When I'm just trying a dancer out I'll usually just go with it (and cut her short unless she really impresses). If you care about it, don't let a dancer start in the middle if you don't know if she's counting the song or not.
avatar for winex
winex
4 years ago
@Icey gets upset if his dates won’t fetch a stick.
avatar for mark94
mark94
4 years ago
Stopping after a dance, or two, either on the floor or VIP, is perfectly acceptable if the performance is subpar. Sadly, it’s pretty common with new, untested dancers.
avatar for bubba267
bubba267
4 years ago
Yes, only once, but I stopped a girl halfway through her second song as she began to lay out a long set of rules. I wasn't even trying to touch her but was sitting with hands by my side. I said " I'm good, thanks, handed her a twenty and moved to a different chair.

To be honest I still can't remember why it irritated me so much that day, but I remember there were a lot of cute girls on the floor and I didn't want to waste another minute.
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
4 years ago
No ive never done this. I have let dances go on for far too long when I should have cut her off at one or two songs.
avatar for VanessaM
VanessaM
4 years ago
Hope this never happens to me
avatar for IfIGottaBeDamned
IfIGottaBeDamned
4 years ago
Only once. She was cute dancer who had been at the club for a couple of months. But turns out she was only willing to air dance when every other dancer in the club performed a solid grind.

After finding this out, I stood up half way though first song, said “Thank you”, gave her the $30 base fee for a LD, and started to walk away. As I was walking away, she asked me for a tip. Internally I was dumbfounded. It’s not like I LDK’d or anything.

But I just turned around and said “Nah... don’t worry about it... I don’t need one.” Then I continued my way back to the floor.
avatar for gSteph
gSteph
4 years ago
Only one time have I 'abandoned' a dance.

{ cut and paste from review }

> My next lap dance was not so typical for here. “Alexis” has ‘style’, looks (medium for height, boobs, curves, but a perfect ‘medium’ for my preferences), and keeps hands, eyes, and body or boobs on/against you at all times. I had thoroughly enjoyed her underboob, side boob, cleavage kissing, and full boob caress when she announced she prefers her breasts not be touched. “You’re kidding, right?” But she wasn’t. I thought for a second about bailing, but her dancing was very erotic and pleasant. So, I went with it, caressing her all over with abandon (well, most of her). Maybe her nipples were sensitive this day(s) of the month. Fun, but one and done. ~

This lass - she moved slow and sensuous, and was beautiful, very promising start - started mid-song in the lap dance room. "Shouldn't we wait for new song to start?" I to. "We are" she replied, "I'm just warming up." Cool. As 1st (full) song started, she made above announcement.

Several months later I failed to recognize her and we headed back to LD room, and I, as I often do, said "I will not try to touch your sex, and actually prefer a topless only dance". Thanks for sharing she replied and announced boobs as off limits. (Oh, now I remember). "Thanks, but I'm going to pass". Gave her a few ones for her time and walked out. Damn, she had nice boobs - but I'd already seen them up close.
avatar for Hannathedog79
Hannathedog79
4 years ago
My experience, which is limited mainly to Phoenix in the spring and maybe one or two trips to a club in Sacramento per year, is that I tend to find out at the $100 mark if a dance is going to stay tame (which is everything from minor grinding to licking nipple) or is going to expand to "below the waist" fun for both participants. This is obviously based on a Dance-to-Dance payment plan as opposed to the 3/$xxx or $xxx for 15 minute plans. The next dance after $100 is usually when I find out if rules are loosened or if I just got the best I'm gonna get. Sometimes it goes faster than that, but for me, that's been the general rule for Non-Floor dances
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
4 years ago
I’ve worked at a club where I was with a disgruntled customer. There was a wristband to get into the dance area that allowed touching. He bought a wrist band but bounced out before he could get a dance. No idea why 🤷🏻‍♀️
avatar for mike710
mike710
4 years ago
We can say he just came in his pants following your into VIP.
avatar for loper
loper
4 years ago
Yes. I was in Mardis Gras II (CT), asked cute girl for LD. She wanted money up front. I've never had a good experience paying up front, so finally learning my lesson, I just said no. won't pay upfront, thank you, and got up to walk away. She actually started crying. Fake tears, I assume, but I didn't relent.
avatar for ancientlurker
ancientlurker
4 years ago
Just once. Girl was drunk beyond any ability to function.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
It's very rare - for the most part experienced SCers stick to clubs where we know what is expected in terms of mileage, and the dancers know what is expected in terms of mileage - *usually* PLs that expect mileage will avoid low/no mileage clubs and dancers that don't like mileage avoid mileage clubs - so for me it's rare that I run into a dancer that does not allow typical mileage for the club (two-way touching); thus I rarely find myself in this position.

As most PLs, I will usually just wait it out till the end of the song - I respect a dancer's boundaries b/c that's her choice; for me to stop mid song or b/f the song, her requests not only have to be unreasonable, but she'll also likely say it w/ an attitude.

Two instances I remember:

1) Club Climaxxx Miami circa 2016 - small black dive where two-way-contact is the norm (not only for the club, but the whole SoFlo region) - had an ebony start dancing for me barside as is the norm at this club - she was b/w me and the bar - she kept asking me to back up - at first I thought it was so she could have a bit more room, bu the more I backed-up the more she asked me to back my barstool until I figured out it was b/c she wanted to avoid all contact - we get a lot of young people visiting Miami b/c it's a party-place; I "assume" she may have been from an area where air-dances were the norm and she was used to dancing w/o contact and expected that in Miami - anyway once I backed-up my barstool enough so she could air-dance, I just stopped the dance and gave her the $ for the one song (and she then looked at me as if something was wrong w/ *me*)

2) shit - I didn't sleep enough last night and forgot the 2nd time it happened (again b/c it's so rare)

IMO it's disingenuous for a dancer to agree to dances with a custy then try to short-change him on mileage by telling him her special rules after she has started to dance for him - this would be like a custy trying to pay a dancer below the established club price.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
I've also had a dancer bail on me once while we were waiting for the next song to start (may have happened more than once but I can only recall one instance right now).

Baby Dolls Dallas early 2000s (old location) - BDs was the first club I visited when I moved to Big-D in 2000 - I was not an SCer back then and ran into the club one night driving around getting to know the city, and BDs kinda became my homeclub in Big-D for the first 2 or 3 years I was there b/f I turned to the dark-side (and I also did not SC as much back then so BDs sufficed for most of my SCing back then) - anyway there was a short 20-something stacked blond (around 5'0 with Ds); I think they were fake but they looked good in her 2-piece top - she came across as a bit bitchy but hey I wasn't there looking for a wife - anyway we agree to dances and are sitting at a high-top waiting for the next song to start when all of a sudden she spots someone she knows and just says "I gotta go" and she bails for the other custy all smiles and open-arms as if Troy Aikman had walked in the building - it was actually a pretty-good-looking young-guy also in his 20s and it kinda seemed more like he either was an acquaintance of hers or as if she had the hots for him - anyway it felt kinda rude but after a few-minutes I came to the conclusion it was for the best since she came across pretty-bitchy from the get-go; plus there was no shortage of targets @ BDs.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
4 years ago
===> "I doubt I'm alone in this but wonder how many others have walked away from a dance that was just getting started."

Plenty of times over the years. I've also done the same with timed VIPs. Not so much out of anger or disgust, but simply to cut my losses. Sure I wasn't thrilled, but I don't get terribly worked up when I swing the occasional strike. There's simply no sense in burning valuable time if she's a dud and it doesn't hurt that it eliminates tip expectations too.
avatar for docsavage
docsavage
4 years ago
I've only abandoned a dance once after it started. I started to do one with a girl and when I touched her breast she said I had to give her extra money to touch her. This was in a club where something like that is a normal part of the lap dance, she said it in an unfriendly tone of voice and she waited until after the dance started instead of telling me before it started what was allowed on a normal lap dance. I told her I had enough and handed her the money for one dance and left. I've had three girls I walked off on before the dance started. One told me her lap dances were $50 in a club where the norm was $25, one yelled at me I wasn't sitting in the right place on the couch, and one wanted to start in the middle of a dance and angrily refused when I asked to wait until the start of the next dance.

I would say ninety nine percent of the time I don't have problems. I've noticed the one percent of strippers I have problems with usually have short stripper careers because I don't see them stay at the club very long. I think most guys expect to be treated with some level of politeness and not be treated as an inferior by a girl they are spending money on. Girls who aren't willing to do that can't usually make it in a strip club because they are competing with other girls who are willing to be at least a little bit polite and friendly.
avatar for DenimChicken
DenimChicken
4 years ago
Done this a few times but not often. When a dance is completely horrible I'll usually just wait until the first one is over and just leave it at that - but sometimes it's just worth it to get up and leave.

No specific stories memorized. Most times have been offensive air dances (when that is nowhere near the club's standard). There was one time where I told a girl she was quite rude and that alone made me get up. Don't recall what she said/did.
avatar for minnow
minnow
4 years ago
I haven't done it for a single dance, but 3 times in last 5 years I've "bailed" before the first song started when dancer asked for upfront payment in a club where that isn't the norm. I already paid $5 fee to go back to lapdance area, a small loss compared to chasing good money after bad for $20 plus lapdance(s).
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
4 years ago
Yeah sunk cost for a dud. Fuck it, next girl, it happens man.
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
4 years ago
i’ve walked out twice. vip each time.
once at synn coi. she just stayed on the pole (mini vip showroom) for the whole first song.
once at bare elegance. she posed across the vip room. i left at end of first song.
at cheatas san diego i should have left a vip ‘ice box’ session.
avatar for day_trader
day_trader
4 years ago
I don't recall ever leaving in the middle of a song before, but cut the dances off after one or two plenty of times.

Seems nowadays that girls will try and get away with counting that initial half a song as one. Can't really blame them. A lot of guys won't make a fuss over that and she has made some easy money.

Made my first trip to my local club since it re-opened, about a week ago. On the first full song girl starts trying to upsell. Didn't even ask if she was going to count the first half song, just gave her money for two dances and cut my losses.
avatar for latinalover69
latinalover69
4 years ago
Oh man in my 15 year SC career I would say I walked out before the 1st song was over at least 5 times. It was either a bitchy attitude or a horrific dance. Just got up and threw her a $20. The one I really remember was a dancer who was a stone cold 11. However, her attitude was like "I'm too good for this place". And her dance reflected that attitude.
avatar for Hank Moody
Hank Moody
4 years ago
CH3 in Vegas, January 2015. From my review:

“A girl dropped into my lap who was just my type. I suppose I was high on the gambling success, a ton of booze and the earlier good times in the private room. 30 seconds into our floor dance she asked if I wanted to go to the back and off we went. Once we got back there, she complained that I only wanted 15 minutes and then gave me as close to an air dance as you can in Vegas and spent the entire time talking and telling me how good (bad) she'd be if we upgraded. About 5 minutes in I was hoping it would end soon, but had already paid, so I was actually doing the math in my head to ascertain what kind of a loss this would be. Seriously, this girl was ridiculously hot and I was doing math and hoping the dance would end. It sucked. Finally, after she wouldn't shut up and I couldn't take it anymore, I waited til she shifted to the side and just stood up, told her I didn't want any more dances and went to leave. She then asked for a tip and when I declined, she got progressively more hostile. She then asked for $20 for the 30 second floor dance, which I also declined, figuring we ended the private room dance early and because, well she was horrible. Once she figured out she couldn't convince me to pay, she asked why I was being an asshole and that she believed in karma. I told her that the dance sucked and if she wanted to keep complaining we should go get the manager. At that point she backed down and I went back to the floor.”

I actually saw this girl at least two more times on my annual trips to Vegas so she worked there awhile. Super hot Asian chick but the memory was strong enough that I avoided her.
You must be a member to leave a comment.Join Now