Advice needed on how to drop a favorite dancer
kingknight
Virginia
I have been frequenting this club for about 8 months or so, and have been making regular visits every 4 to 6 weeks. I have seen this dancer exclusively each time and usually spend a fair amount of money on dances and VIPs (average about $700 per trip). My question is, how do I move on from this dancer without having to find a new club?
She is ok, but at this point I want some variety and try some of the other gorgeous strippers at the club. Plus, I'm very comfortable with the club, level of service, security, etc., so I don't want to have to find a new club. She is there all the time, every time I go in, so avoiding her is not really a choice. I know with that level of spend if I'm not spending it on her when I'm there, there could be some drama, and I don't want to get a bad reputation.
Any sage advice?
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Dancers know this comes with the territory. I was sitting with a fav one day when she remarked "See that guy? He used to be my best customer. Came in all the time just to see me. Couldn't get enough of me in the VIP. Then one day he just stopped getting dances from me. " She said this in a very matter-of-fact "c'est la vie" tone.
Then she grabbed my arm, snuggled up to me and said, "good thing that will never happen with you, right sweetie?" I dropped her a couple months later. Oh, well.
Playing coy won't work. Given how much you spend on her, you're probably going to need to be direct in order to get her to leave you alone.
You've really got 3 choices: (1) Find a different club; (2) Go when she is not working; or (3) man up and just let her know that you're looking to explore other options.
You don't want to leave the club, so either you avoid her or you just break the news to her. Avoidance only works for so long and really jams up your options, so in my opinion your best bet is just to let her know, right out of the gate, that you would really like to get to know some of the other girls in the club.
I would say that is a very fair amount!!!
Hey – it’s your $$$ and you should, and have the right to, spend it to your satisfaction – It’s not as if she is with you for free. Don’t know how long you have SCed – but as others will tell you – it’s all comes down to the $$$ - don’t be fooled into thinking otherwise.
As other have suggested, there is nothing wrong, and you are in your right, to tell her how you feel. 99.9% of the time, the dancers DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU or your feelings; they only care about the $$$ you spend on them. As long as you are spending $$$ on them (especially hundreds of $s every time you see her), they will make you feel special and many of them will give you SS (see TUSCL glossary) or try to give you a guilt trip if you tell them you want to “see†other dancers b/c they don’t want to lose out on sure $$$.
One way that often gets dancers to disappear is to tell them you don’t have any $$$ - they’ll disappear so fast you’d think they had left the state.
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just listen to me
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
He wants to *drop* his current dancer, and your solution is to give her *more* attention?
Although, maybe you've got a point. kingknight, maybe you *should* do a double VIP with her and another girl. Then give *all* the money to the new girl and say something like "I had a great time. You girls split this however you like."
Then run.
Seriously, rick's number 3 is the best advice. The reaction you get may range from attempted guilt evocation ("don't you like me anymore?") to mostly rational ("OK, let me know if need anything else.") If you're lucky, she may be of the "What can I do to make you stay?" type.
Remember her side, though. She stands to lose a bit of cash if you see others, and it wouldn't be entirely rational on *your* part to think that she's going to let that go easily, so be prepared for a variety of tactics to get you to stay. However, if you're firm and polite, and don't fall for any bullshit, the worst that will happen is she'll start spreading bullshit about you to the other girls. Waving $700 under their noses will likely negate that tactic, though.
Lying and telling her you're broke may backfire (if you care) when you give somebody else some money. In my opinion, telling the truth, i.e. "I'd like to see some other dancers tonight," is still the best policy. You shouldn't be afraid of a little drama on her part, after, as pointed out by others, it *is* your money to do with as you please.
It may not be applicable to you, but I just love the expression on a girl's face when I pull out the "If my *wife* can handle me seeing other women, so can *you*" rejoinder to their possessiveness. :)
I can hardly believe my eyes. Telling a dancer the truth & being just like ME!
"But fortunately, the AA beauty has either a short memory or just a good amount of common sense because we've been back for a couple of recent hot sessions in the VIP"
IMHO I'd say common sense from a business POV.
"Always Leave the Cage Door Open, So the Bird Can Return". This was a line of dialogue from a movie called "Rising Sun" a 1993 film. I was watching this Blu-Ray disc recently. That bit of advice seems to apply here.
Tell her it's business, sometimes it's walmart, sometimes it's target, sometimes it's K-mart. (She won't like this comparison, but face it, stripper relationships are discount relationships.)
"sometimes it's walmart, sometimes it's target, sometimes it's K-mart."
sometimes it's the dollar store...