Dancer asked me to Zelle her money
patrickbateman
Florida
A dancer texted me saying she had an emergency and needed to get a new tire on her car. She asked me if I could Zelle her $230. This is a girl that I always do rooms with and get all the extras I want from regularly. When I do rooms with her it's $300 to her. I told her that I will Zelle her to help her out if next time we do a room together she'll deduct it from the money I pay her, meaning that I would only owe her $70 for the next room instead of $300. She agreed and I Zelle'd her the money. The next time I saw her at the club she said I needed to give her $300 as she has no money. I told her that's not what we agreed to and that if she ever has an emergency again and needs money I won't give it to her she doesn't show me I can trust her. I ended up doing the room with her anyway and gave her the full $300. She said next time she'll deduct it. Then, the next time I saw her she again said she has no money and needs $300. Basically, I think I just got scammed out of $230. I don't really care as it's a nominal amount of money but it's more the principle that bothers me. This is my favorite girl at the club that I have the best time in the room with so I don't want to lose her but now she showed me I can't trust her. I decided I'll just do rooms with her and give her the $300 and that's it. If she ever asks me for anything again the answer will be "no" and I'll remind her that she didn't honor our agreement that one time I tried to help her out.
Have you guys ever had something like this happen to you before? I imagine this happens all the time. I think she probably texted 10 guys asking for $230 for some emergency and probably got it from most of them. The funny thing is she didn't even work that weekend (she asked me for the money on a Friday). We probably paid for her vacation lol. Anyway, not a big deal but she definitely will miss out on ever getting any more $ from me than the fee to do a room with her at the club.
Have you guys ever had something like this happen to you before? I imagine this happens all the time. I think she probably texted 10 guys asking for $230 for some emergency and probably got it from most of them. The funny thing is she didn't even work that weekend (she asked me for the money on a Friday). We probably paid for her vacation lol. Anyway, not a big deal but she definitely will miss out on ever getting any more $ from me than the fee to do a room with her at the club.
62 comments
It doesn't matter if she was running a scam or was truly sincere at the moment when she asked for help. There is almost never any upside to fronting a dancer money. At best you become her creditor. Nobody likes a creditor once the borrowed money is spent. That's especially true for a dancer, who is wired to treat yesterday's customer cash inflow as money freely given, regardless of any hot air agreement to the contrary.
Lesson learned. Next time you should consider countering with an earning opportunity instead.
i know tellys aint free, plus gas and safety supplies etc.
i dont care how bad or good the service is after the 1st telly date you should deduct fifty bucks from her asking price from then on. you can what u like about her, 300 adds up
quick if your just another JOHN...
I would have thought a person that's been to clubs a few times and been on this site awhile would know how the situation you wrote about would likely play out.
I have regular who I ask for favors and I always deliver as promise but sometimes he’d give me money anyway.
Maybe you’re not a good of customer as you think or maybe she is a robb
https://tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=5213…
Also, call me old fashioned and/or paranoid, but I don't do electronic transfers of money to pay for my sexy fun time. I mean, if you're in a life situation where it's fine for you, then have at it. But for anyone who wants/requires a level of discretion or separation between their more public life and P4P, electronic transfers are a mine field.
There are no birds that eat digital breadcrumbs. They are forever.
Not all dancers are ROBs but a good # are - lending a dancer $$$ is a crapshoot at best - anyone can have a financial emergency but usually the issues that cause the emergencies are usually the same issues that make it so they are unlikely to be able to pay you back; many of them are constantly behind-the-8-ball.
As others have said, when you lend a dancer $$$ assume you won't get it back - a bigger issue beyond a one time loan is that some dancers start seeing you as "Mr Emergency" and hitting you up with multiple emergencies.
Well apparently she was having problems with her boyfriend and needed some money to move out. He wasn't beating her or anything, just making her life miserable. She was embarrassed to ask, so the other girl approached me. She said anything I could come up with would help, and the girl would pay me back either in cash or services.
Well I really liked this girl so I went to the ATM down the street and took out $500. When I handed it to her she was so happy, started kissing me and thanking me, and swore to pay me back. I stopped her and said it's not a loan and doesn't need to be paid back. My reasoning was that $500 is about what I might spend on an excessive night of clubbing. Not that I usually spend that much, but I have quite a few times. I promised myself that the next time I had the urge to go out and blow that much cash at a club I'd deposit $500 into my IRA account instead, and that's exactly what I did a few weeks later.
Next time I saw her she told me about her new place and what a big help the extra money was. She was able to hire a couple neighborhood guys to move all her stuff and buy a few things she needed. She was so happy to be away from the asshole she was living with.
She never again asked me for money beyond what I spend on LDs/VIP, and from that point on our sessions together were noticeably more intimate and personal. I considered it money well spent. Unfortunately a year or so later she got married and quit the life. I don't regret it. I hope she's happy.
Hopefully it wasn't to the asshole - a lot of these girls seem unable or unwilling to ditch douchebag S.O.s
click onto SUBMIT YOUR CASE
Personally I think once lies start and you give in. You hand over a lot of power and leverage and boundaries and she will do it again and it'll escalate.
https://tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=7615… / https://myhoustonmajic.com/3747762/only-…
Don't give a stripper money expecting to get it back. As Rick mentioned, trying to get it back is usually gonna make it worse. There's exceptions of course, but if you have to ask its probably not an exception. That said, sometimes those small assists pay off big. I've done plenty to help out strippers and for the most part been rewarded accordingly. I've also had a few not so great experiences, but I only took risks I could manage and have no real issues with the bad experiences.
This is why I never get attached in the club. Because your only good to them until your wallet dries up
Regardless, good for you (and him). That's how it should work.
For example if she'd ask for money for a tire id tell her a tire can be a lot cheaper and ask her where she is. That ill come over and help.
one time a girl claimed she was jn a car accident so I got her a personal injury attorney 🤣🤣🤣
Only all of us lol... or at least all of us who give strippers our numbers. I think by far the #1 lesson: never lend a stripper money. All rules are made to be broken, but this is one that there are VERY few exceptions for. You lending her money fucks up everything, most of the time, leaves you feeling scammed, and now you've lost your CF also. Read 15 stories of PLs lending strippers money, 14 will say they never got paid back. It's just a stupid move -- but also one many PLs make. Making it once is understandable; more than that, you deserve what you get.
And usually the stripper isn't even asking for a loan. She's desperate for $ for whatever reason. She asked for the money outright. You offered her a loan because ... why? Because you don't want to give her a gift, but too much of a little bitch to say no (we've all been little bitches at one point or other, don't take it personally), so you come up with a scheme to get something back. She's desperate, she'll say anything to get her hands on your $. Now it's hers, and no, she's not paying you back. And you've been scammed so you have to fire her, and you're out a CF. Or you don't fire her, and now she has even less respect for you than when you offered her the loan; expect to be treated like a bitch.
Here's a secret: If a stripper is blowing me away in the club, our OTCs are amazing, she's sleeping over in the hotel room, I feel like I'm getting YMMV with her, etc., and she asks for money -- then I'll give her some cash, sure. Why wouldn't I give a bit extra to someone who is being so generous with her time and body to me? But if I ever think, "well, she's not blowing me away so much that I feel like just giving her $250", then I just say no, a loan is not in the cards.
I've zelled dancers in the club after running out of cash.
I will play along and answer your question:
Q: Have you guys ever had something like this happen to you before?
A: Who hasn’t had something like this happened to them before?
You should know that in this life; clear communication is key and:
“You teach people how to treat you.”
You let her get away with not honoring her word more than once.
If she, an adult, has failed to honor basic social conventions (keep her word), in such a fundamental way, I don’t believe it is worth your time to try to change her behavior.
It is a power trip, that is why you are upset, “it is not the money is the principle.”
I always let people know, in this case a girl (stripper or sugar baby or civilian) how important to me is to keep one’s word, to uphold one's promise; to do as one says.
I would tell her
“The only thing I got in this world is my balls, and my word, and I don't break 'em for nobody.” ~ Tony Montana, Scarface.
You should man up and either tell her it is a gift and really forget about it or get a dance and only give her the $70 as agreed.
Otherwise she knows that she can take advantage of you, and you know it and it bothers you because you are her bitch, like the kids say nowadays.
If she doesn’t “get it” by now, and adult 18 years or older when will she ever “get it”?
I have a two strikes and you are about policy in this type of situations.
For example; I would let a girl I know (stripper or sugar baby or civilian) how important to me is being on time and or letting each other know in advance (this is the key to no getting upset, enough advance notice) if anything changes or we have to reschedule.
I have told a long Time Favorite that; I don’t wait for doctors, lawyers, teachers, priest etc or even family members more than 15 minutes, without communication or explanation.
Now days with cellphones is even easier to let each other know (text) if you are going to be late.
I explained to her that having people waiting is a power trip, is disrespectful and you would be wasting their time, and time/life is one of the most valuable things in this life.
I had the Long Time Favorite agreed to meet OTC, and it was going great.
Needless to say she failed to show up one time for OTC after a handful of good meetings, I texted her, no response, I left after 15 minutes.
Next day she gave me a lame excuse; she was sick and fell asleep at a girlfriend’s. And asked to please give her one last chance. We meet a few more times for OTC and it was OK.
Then again she was a no show, after 15 minutes I sent her a text telling her “I waited for you 15 minutes for the last time”.
I haven seen her after, she texted me and left me voicemail messages apologizing, trying to get together for OTC, I never responded to her.
Make sure that you let her know that you prioritize reliability above almost all other traits as you search for a lasting relationship with an ATF.
My last FAV and I will agree to meet for VIP and was never late, if something came up we would let the other know and reschedule accordingly.
One the best girls I have had the pleasure, she texted me one last time to let me know she was moving and tanked me for the good times.
Thank you for making me remember some good times.
She promised a lot of extra attention next time at the club, but I actually got very little in return.
The next time she asked for money for another emergency, I told her no.
Funny, I never saw her again after that.
Strippers are notoriously bad at repaying loans. They are also bad at budgeting - and saving. Those things are fine - as long as you only use strippers for ITC and OTC transactions - paid in cash.
The bottom line is that if you are going to give a stripper money outside of a services rendered situation (and I have given quite a bit of it), you should view it like she does. It's hers. It's not a loan or an advance, it's a gift.
If she does pay it back, thank your lucky stars, because shes a unicorn.
I consider such gifts goodwill gestures, and while some of them haven't paid off, others have done so nicely.
Every customer eventually runs into a shitty dancer (just like every dancer runs into a shitty customer). Sometimes it happens despite our best efforts to screen out bad actors, and sometimes we have a "fuck it" moment that doesn't pan out.
So, you paid $50 to learn a lesson. Ultimately, that's pretty cheap.
I'm not saying all of this to be an a-hole. I suspect that you sending her that first installment by Zelle, and perhaps other interactions you had with her, made her believe that you were ripe for the big ask. I can't imagine a universe where any girl I deal with would think that I'm a prime target for that and I'm sure that plenty others here share a similar perspective.
I will say, though, that if a dancer screwed me out of any amount of money (even if it's relatively low), I'd look for another dancer. Partly on the principle, and partly because there are plenty of other dancers. I don't need to give my money to the scam dancers.
So, it's possible that the reason why she gave it a shot with you is that after she screwed you out of $230, you kept giving her your money. So, why not take another swing at you to see if you're really that gullible?
If you'd been Pavlov's dog, the man would have died unknown to anyone.
I think that regardless of if I say no to anytime she asks me for favors (which I will because she lost my trust over the measly $230) that when I'm in the club if I want to do a room with her she'll do a room with me. This girl probably makes $500-600 a week off me so I've got to be a good customer for her. She wants my $ and won't want it going to another girl. So, end of the day I don't care. I'll still have her whenever I want her and can decline her attempts.
But that's just me. You do you.
I hate strip club drama and I go to strip clubs to escape drama. If I stop seeing a dancer, then I pick the next dancer based on what I want, and not on what's going to piss off the previous dancer.