You want me to lick what?

"I'm conflicted"

No, you still have the mentality of an adolescent geek. I couldn't give a shit about your sex life.

Don"t be a prude.

I first had my asshole licked by a girl a while back and I love it. If she's clean back there, give it a try and she'll be putty in your hands.

You can block her phone. You can unfriend her on Facebook. You can never unlick her asshole.

Oversharing is careing!

I agree with rockstar666. If she's clean back there (we don't even bother with the enema) I have no problems doing this. Although I come from the other angle where I am the sexual deviant / pervert so I'm the one who likes to do it whereas the ladies oblige me or at least tolerate it. It can fit in with other deviant play / body worship / sensual arousal for her so it fits into the broader picture of lovemaking and mutual climaxing for us.

I generally follow the guideline that I'll try anything at least once. So nothing is ever off limits.

Tongue fuck her pretty little asshole like it was a tight pussy. Have fun!

Dude, you should totally tongue fuck her fart box!

Everything in life carries its risk-to-reward ratio. In a case like analingus, you're risking things like Hepatitis, parasites, weird-ass bacteria -- and it doesn't matter if you shower or enema.

Whatever turns you on, I guess. I'd rather go skydiving.

Do t knock it til you trybit

^Yep.

As a side note I'm finding it funny that a forum of old men who brag about fucking strippers ... Never mind

Shit

I'm finna to use the word "trybit" from now on. I like it almost as much as "finna".

Must of us experiment with analingus in high school, but it's comforting to know that AARP men are still open to new experiences.

Actually, I was on the giving end as recently as January with a dancer, and that's probably the last time in my lifetime.

BBFS -- now that's another story, entirely.

You kissed the DS's asshole. Start there with CS, and work up. Of course, the real question here is, not difficult to kiss the asshole of a 20-something-year-old 10 with a perfect starfish. But the time someone's in their 40s, the starfish doesn't look as pretty, and you become just plain less inclined to dive in there

At least she didnt ask you to lick her sweaty nut sac

Do you know what comes out of that hole? Eww.....

I did see a t-shirt advertised that read "It's not going to lick itself". Maybe I'll buy it. :)

-->"Must of us experiment with analingus in high school, but it's comforting to know that AARP men are still open to new experiences"

RM, you haven't been paying attention if you don't realize that half the fun of this, is going through JS's mental contortions over things the rest of us all did in high school. I'm enjoying watching it.

Damn John. If you're not going to step up and take care of this woman's desires she'll eventually kick you to the curb.

Get her in the shower and have fun washing her ass. Then after drying off throw her fat ass on the bed and toss her salad. I'd say if she asked you to do it then it is something she enjoys.

Well, JS, you "laid off" (triple entendre intended) all of your DSs, so pretty much committed. I doubt she'll object if you do a wet wiping first.

"RM, you haven't been paying attention if you don't realize that half the fun of this, is going through JS's mental contortions over things the rest of us all did in high school. I'm enjoying watching it."

Oh, you're underestimating me. I'm JS's biggest fan. Best entertainment on the web. And free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ive licked the asshole of a young really hot stripper once. Ok maybe twice. A woman my age...NO! But thats just me.

To be fair, in all honesty this is one thing I didn't do in highschool, way too squeamish. I started fantasizing about it in college, and came close a couple of times, then did it for the first time shortly after college.

I eat stripper ass like I'm tha Human Centipede.

Lick her in the butt

I would put her on ignore for asking you to engage in questionable homosexual behavior

Do you just work around the hemorrhoids or what? :)

-->" Ive licked the asshole of a young really hot stripper once. Ok maybe twice. A woman my age..."

Age is the only factor that would remotely get me to hesitate, once my beloved dream whatever requests it.

Oh hell no! That's where I would draw the line. 20 year old asshole good. 50 year old asshole bad.

Shadow lol

USUALLY a lol gravy smothering those hemorrhoids right out.

I prefer gravy made from sausage like grandma used to make nice and brown

I'm sure SJGay will be glad to know that tusclers are so experienced at anal pleasures. It's definitely not my thing but she submits her body for my complete pleasure so I guess I've got to do the same. The shower and wipes are good practical suggestions. Also I'll smoke a shit load of weed beforehand.

And I might go see the DS again. Long story. But maybe I'll practice of her first

Yay! The DS saga continues. I hope it happens so there would be more stories. It's not just about the sex. You have s history with the DS and have shared many experiences. You can't just cut her out of your life completely. If the DC is exclusive then you owe it to her to use condoms with the DS.

Err on the side of caution and do something to numb your tongue. Chew a shit ton of mints, suck an ice cube, scald your taste buds with boiling acid... I've never done it, and I don't know what the DC looks like, but I'm hard pressed to imagine a scenario where I'd try it.

Think of the DS when you DL the DC.

DL=Doo-doo Lick for the ill informed.

I like how John knows the answer to his own questions, but asks anway

Conflicting reports on the DS

John Smith on ignore

"Conflicting reports on the DS

John Smith on ignore"

While my handle is RandomMember, you might say that @Smith's handle should be @RandomBehavior or @RandomBrainCells or @NeuroticMess. As I said before, until his goofy avatar is retired, you can take all this DS drama with a grain of salt.

"And I might go see the DS again. Long story. But maybe I'll practice of her first" Good move JS! Like bavarian said young asshole good, old asshole bad!...LOL!!!!

One of the best threads I've read in a while.

Although I've come close I've never done it but I'm not against doing it if I really like her and know her asshole is 100% clean like if we just left the shower after I've personally scrubbed her ass.

"All is fair in love and war"

And as you said - she always submits to you so you gotta try and please her - give it a try and if you can handle it then do it at least for her if it does not do anything for you - perhaps placing a small piece of ice in there may accentuate the experience for her and make it easier on you (or something edible that you can put in there so it's not a completely raw thing - maybe some gay websites/boards may have some good suggestions; at least I assume gay guys would be more into that but IDK)

I so got all you simps on ignore, it's like I'm talking to myself.

hey, beguiled, thats awesome. youre so cool. i bet you get free head all the time.

I'm a crazyjoe alias. Blame him.

You should do it, JS. Just be sure she remembered2wipe.

I did it once in college. The girl has to be extremely fckn hot. And like others, who want to lick a 50 year old asshole? More time for more shit to happen...

If JS says she tastes like shit, would that be funny? :)

Hell to the no.

This is too funny. If's she's everything you say you'd do anything that turns her on no questions asked. Just take a shower first.

Then JS can explain to the doctor how he got some anal disease on his tongue. She wanted you to lick her rear end? Yes you say. So you did? Ok well next time use protection or use listermint on her first.

Ever notice that when she is laying on her stomach and you are eating her pussy, where your nose is? :)

Douse her bhole with listermint and put a rubber on your tongue.

oh shit, and light some candles.

"This is too funny. If's she's everything you say you'd do anything that turns her on no questions asked. Just take a shower first."

Brilliant!

Even if she isn't all she says she is just do it anyway. It'll be fun! ;)

And have her give you a rimjob too! People on here seem to think that I'm joking when I say "rimjobs = ace" but I'm not!

Just do it JohnSmith69! ;)

It sounds like the idea of it has pretty much killed the future of the relationship at this point. Probably the best plan would be to mention not being into into licking ass and see if it's a dealbreaker for her. It apparently is for you, so I'm going with the "you can never unlick her asshole" sentiment.

You may never unlick an asshole, but so what?

There are plenty of things in life you can never undo. Some are brilliant and some are non-brilliant. You reminisce about the brilliant things and ignore the non-brilliant.

Try it JohnSmith69. If you like it keep going, if you don't like it it's not like she's going to hold a gun to your head to do it again.

And if you think she might hold a gun to your head there are big issues with the relationship. End it because she might hold a gun to your head! ;)

I'm going to try it tonight. Got lots o weed available.

Go for it John. Nothing to be ashamed of; just a normal part of human development. Freud explains the fascination with the anus here:

"The anal stage, in Freudian psychology, is the period of human development occurring at about one to three years of age. Around this age, the child begins to toilet train, which brings about the child's fascination in the erogenous zone of the anus."

Just pretend it's a pot brownie.

-- >"This is too funny. If's she's everything you say you'd do anything that turns her on no questions asked. Just take a shower first."

Finally, some sanity!

^ If the idea of doing what she says turns her on drives him back to a stripper he has described as a prostitute who will probably pass him an STD to lick said stripper's asshole, maybe it's actually worth just telling DC that's nasty, can we not do that? It could be that she values the relationship at a 9 and ass licking at a 2.

If instead, DC values the relationship at a 2 and ass-licking at a 9, would it really be worth it?

A DS is not a prostitute. She's a high end escort.

^ Ahem, you're the one who called her a prostitute when the topic of breaking it off with her was under discussion. I thought it sounded a little harsh at the time, too. The point was that you might be miscalculating the priorities of the DC in doing this disgusting thing. Or maybe not. ;)

@ppwh. It took more than 60 posts to arrive at a sensible solution.