Boycott Chicago area strip clubs!!!

avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
Chicago area strip clubs are totally crummy, not fun, very boring in many cases. All but 1 of the "touching-permitted-during-lap-dances" in Chicagoland sit in horrible, crime and violence infested neighborhoods (the ghetto). Shootings, homicides, armed robberies, assaults, mob attacks, car jackings, and all.

Unfortunately, then again, Chicago proper especially has a HUGE ghetto! It covers roughly 75 percent of Chicago proper, give or take a few square miles, and even over a dozen suburbs. In fact, Chicago is so loaded with crime that the only "safe and low crime" neighborhoods of Chicago proper are; Dunning, O'Hare, Monteclare, Norwood Park, Edison Park, Jefferson park, Forest glen, North park, West ridge, Rogers park, Edgewater, Garfield ridge, and Clearing. The rest of Chicago proper, including Downtown Chicago, Grant Park, and the Museum Campus area, is all endless ghetto. To make matters worse still, within the ghetto, whatever area is not covered by street gangs (Latin Kings, Four Corner Hustlers, Mickey Cobras, etc) is covered by lethal Flash Mobs, which are in fact far more dangerous to innocent people than the Gangster Disciples! Flash Mobs shoot, beat, and then rob innocent people blind and then leave them for dead. They are even known to ruthlessly attack city buses and trains. When Flash Mobs attack, they attack in HUGE groups, and they attack like packs of hungry wolves. In addition, suburbs covered by Chicago's massive ghetto include Evergreen Park, Dolton, Cicero, Harvey, Chicago Heights, Ford Heights, Homewood, Matteson, Lynwood, Glenwood, Thornton, Hazel Crest, Flossmoor, Olympia Fields, Markham, Midlothian, South Holland, Riverdale, Blue Island, Park Forest, Sauk Village, South Chicago Heights, and Lansing. The Chicago ghetto also extends farther eastward, nonstop, uninterrupted, eastward right through Gary, Indiana, and covers the following cities/towns in Indiana; Dyer, Munster, Highland, Schererville, Hammond, St John, East Chicago, Gary, Griffith, and Merrillville. There is even a second, separate crime ridden ghetto west of Chicago that covers the following cities/towns in Illinois; Maywood, Bellwood, Melrose Park, and Stone Park. Worse still, a lot of the ghetto suburbs, including Harvey and Ford Heights, even have imprisoned/jailed mayors that did numerous illegal things such as drug dealing and possibly even theft/robbery.

The suburbs of Chicago also apparently have their share of Chicago area strip clubs, even including a couple high enders such as Club O in Harvey, and Atlantis in Ford Heights. But be warned very seriously! Both sit in total gangster's paradise type neighborhoods, where criminals will blast you to swiss cheese for your car, wallet, bicycle, even the clothes on your back. Atlantis especially loves to lure unsuspecting strip club customers with it's high glamour and erotic-looking atmosphere. But the only reason they do that is so they can continue to read reports the next morning of people getting brutally murdered and gunned down, fired on while driving down Lincoln Highway and/or Highway 394, robbed at gun point and then beaten, shot, and left for dead in the parking lot. Stay the BLAZES away from these places at ALL costs if you want to live!

While Polekatz Gentlemen's club in west suburban Bridgeview does sit in a much safer neighborhood, Polekatz has policies that are certain to send you scurrying right back out the door, never to return! As if the club's no-touching rule wasn't enough, Polekatz has a very strict "fresh drink" policy for all customers. Basically, you must have a fresh drink on your table at all times. Drinks cost $4 each, and when the drink is finished, it costs $4 for a refill, and when that is finished, another $4 for a refill, and so on. Without a fresh drink on your table, club security will tell you to leave the club. They do not care if you have been there for 5 hours; the instant you stop buying fresh drink after fresh drink, you get kicked out of the club.

So in all essence, all strip club customers and patrons, stay away from Chicago, unless you plan to go to All Star Bar and Grill in Lyons/McCook. All Chicago area strip clubs, even the high end ones, with the exception of All Star Bar and Grill, are totally NOT worth you getting gunned down, robbed, murdered, and left for dead. And neither are the ones in the safe neighborhoods, with the exception of All Star Bar and Grill, worth endless boredom and money drainage.

38 comments

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avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
Damn – tried to read it all but only got about 60% thru it.

Comes of more like a sociology thesis than SC specific
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
Just read the last paragraph – just seems like a plug for “All Star Bar and Grill”
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
All Star Bar and Grill is the ONLY strip club in the entire Chicago Metropolitan Area that; 1, sits in a safe neighborhood, 2, allows two way touching during lap dances, and 3, does not make you keep buying drinks on top of drinks continuously. They have only a 1 drink minimum policy, and once you buy that 1 drink, you are good for the rest of your visit.
avatar for boogieknight369
boogieknight369
12 years ago
Great story bro....
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
Although it seems Illinois really loves putting it's strip clubs, or at least the majority of them, in bad neighborhoods. East St Louis, for instance, has a few strip clubs, but it's crime rate is practically TWICE that of St Louis proper. Nearby Washington Park is practically no better either, especially with 3 years under it's belt of triple-digit murder rates; in fact, in 2011, the murder rate in Washington Park was a totally unbelieveable, and practically no where else seen, 166.3 per 100,000 people! Even Gary, Indiana, Opa-Locka, Florida, New Orleans, Louisiana, and Camden, New Jersey are NO where near that high with their murder rates!
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
12 years ago
I'm in. I will consider Chicago strip clubs boycotted. They probably won't notice me missing though.
avatar for chimark
chimark
12 years ago
LOL... I live in Chicago area and I could barely read that rant... PS... I would disagree with his recommendation of All Star bar and grill, haven't had any success there at all. I'd recommend Polekatz, Atlantis or Club O over that place...

Chicago clubs are pretty lame but know that going in and I just said it in around 50 words....
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
@chimark; Atlantis and Club O? Are you insane?! Harvey and Ford Heights are waaay too dangerous to even DRIVE through in a car! People get shot at while DRIVING in their CARS in both Harvey and Ford Heights. The Mayor of Ford Heights is in jail for drug dealing, plus it has even been rumored before that the Mayor of Ford Heights may have even been a suspected perpetrator of 9/11! In Harvey, practically half the buildings, both business and residential, are burned out, boarded up wrecks, loaded with vandalism. Dixie Square Mall stood totally vacant and falling into ruin for almost 30 years years before it was finally demolished in 2012.


If you really are looking for something high end, sorry, but you are going to have to look in another metropolitan area.
avatar for mjx01
mjx01
12 years ago
Chi-town is a waste SC wise. Not as bad as San Diego IMO, but definitely in the strip club purgatory category.
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
12 years ago
Great story smokey...As far as I'm concerned this story is a plug for gun rights. East St. Louis/ Washington Park are in Illinois which is anti gun and does not issue concieled carry permits and is "double the crime rate of St. Louis proper" which is in Missouri and is very gun friendly and allows carry permits for honest citizens. Hmmm.

Chicago is completely firearm unfriendly. Chicago has a complete gun ban and will not allow any leagal guns period in the city. A direct violation of the constitution. Chicago's gun ban allows criminals to still have guns and allows them to run right over the top of honest citizens who have been stripped of their right to defend themselves.

Banning guns may look good on paper but this is what you get in the real world if gun rights are taken away.

avatar for baconator
baconator
12 years ago
Can we just boycott all of Chicago?
avatar for goodsouthernboy
goodsouthernboy
12 years ago
Can't boycott Wrigley Field, pops took me to my first big league game there. More than happy to boycott the rest
avatar for farmerart
farmerart
12 years ago
I like Arnies in Harvey, It is a clean, well run SC cum brothel.

I have a completely different impression of Chicagoland than does smokeybear. My two excursions to Chicago were very pleasant. I like the downtown. I like the lakefront. I like Wrigley Field (but not the pissers). Cripes, I even liked visiting the refinery complexes southeast of Chicago. I stopped at a sand dunes park at the bottom of Lake Michigan in Indiana. Looking back across the lake to Chicago was an unbelievably surrealistic experience. The park was a joy of natural beauty contrasted so starkly with the views of greater Chicago across the lake.

I am an unsophisticated western Canadian hillbilly so I blithely traveled wherever I chose while I visited Chicago. Sure, some parts of Chicago are gritty; but so what? Other urban areas that I have visited elsewhere in the world are even grittier.

Even hillbillies have basic common sense. I use that common sense whenever I visit places like Chicago.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
12 years ago
BAN CHICAGO !!
avatar for catman1
catman1
12 years ago
Ban all these stupid ass comments about Chicago!
avatar for sinclair
sinclair
12 years ago
As the weather warms up In Chicago, people are outside more and the murder/crime rates go up. The first warm day this spring was marred by 500 "urban youths" wilding out downtown. Innocent people were attacked and beaten and robbed throughout downtown. I'll cosign Smokey's rant.
avatar for Lappinme2
Lappinme2
12 years ago
Don't they wear pantyhose at All Star Bar? Too scratchy!
avatar for scatterbrain
scatterbrain
12 years ago
I'm of the opinion that the OP is shilling for All Stars. Yes, I agree that Chicago clubs are fairly lame, but as unsafe as he makes them out to be? I say, no way. He's tried this same tactic in some of the reviews . Really? If it's as bad as he makes it out in Chicago, what makes him think the area around All Stars is immune? Makes no sense. Instead of banning Chicago, I think I'll ban smokeybear.
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
12 years ago
Fuck you catman. Write some reviews first rhen talk your shit
avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan
12 years ago
I'm with Catman. The one thing all those 2AM stories have in common is that they're not in the Chicago area.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
12 years ago
Chicago area clubs are mostly lame, and the crime rate is high there, But I have been to the city and its clubs many times with absolutely no problems. In particular, industrial strip, while a good 30 minute drive away, can be a very fun club. The only thing I have ever been threatened with there is pussy.
avatar for jc8891
jc8891
12 years ago
Arnie's is all right if you go early enough. With the days getting longer you can stay a little later. I certainly would not even consider going there late at night.
avatar for MrDeuce
MrDeuce
12 years ago
I don't deny that Chicago has huge crime problems and a very high murder rate, but the OP is exaggerating both the extent of the "ghetto" and the dangers of the south suburbs.

I'm a late middle-aged white guy from a small town downstate, about 3 hours south of Chicago, and visit Chicago several times a year on business and/or pleasure. Every time I go, I stay at one of the relatively cheap hotels at the Halsted St. exit off I-80/294 and patronize two or three strip clubs, usually Club O in Harvey or Club 390 in Chicago Heights but sometimes Skybox in Harvey or Jimmy's in Chicago Heights. I've also been to Polekatz in Bridgeview and Heavenly Bodies in Elk Grove Village. Perhaps I'm living in a bubble, but I *always* have a good time at Chicago strip clubs and *always* feel safe. I wouldn't walk in Harvey by myself late at night, but I have no problem with visiting Club O in the afternoon or Club 390 day or night.

As far as the extent of the "ghetto" is concerned, it is hyperbolic to claim that "75% of Chicago proper" is ghetto, given that Chicago is roughly 1/3 each white, black, and Latino. The ghetto is confined to the south side and certain close suburbs such as Harvey and Ford Heights plus Gary and environs in Indiana. It's a stretch to call a middle-class black suburb like Olympia Fields (median family income: $89K) part of the ghetto, not to mention a mostly white suburb such as Schererville (86% white) or St. John (94% white).

As a small-town redneck from eastern Illinois, I agree with farmerart. I blithely go wherever I want in Chicago and use common sense to avoid trouble. The OP needs to take a chill pill.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
12 years ago
I spent my high school years in the far western suburb of St. Charles and while there are certainly many parts of Chicago and its suburbs which are not worth going to, the good news is you can just skip them. The strip clubs are no doubt lame within Chicago, but so what? If every place had good strip clubs, we would have to change what it means to be a good strip club. I'll admit to never going to any of the south suburban clubs or whether any of them are worth it, but if I ever make it there, I'm sure there is a good time to go.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
12 years ago
Business takes me to Chicago several times per year. I'll agree with the other posters. The OP overstated the problem in the suburbs.

Maybe I wouldn't walk around some parts of Hammond at night, but I have no reason to. We're talking about strip clubs - and Industrial Strip is as safe as anywhere. One gets off of the tollway and a couple of turns and you're there.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
Take a road trip if you want less boring Clubs. It isn't Rocket Science.
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
Chicago may be only a third black, a third White and a third Latino, but serial killers, gang bangers, mobsters, and other criminals come in ALL races! Gangsters are NOT all Black/African American. They can also be white/Caucasian, Mexican, Hispanic, Asian, European, American, Canadian, you name it. All races and All nationalities are prone to having people who have demonstrated that they will never follow the law and are out to cause chaos. And in fact, I am not sure that I'd even feel safe going to either Atlantis or Club O in an army convoy and riding in the tank, or even in an AH-64 Apache helicopter or a Harrier Jump jet!
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
Even if you look at the website of John Walsh's "America's Most Wanted", you will see many high-end wanted fugitives that are white and caucasion. Even fugitives wanted for homicide, even multiple homicides, sexual assaults, vicious armed robberies, including armed robberies that ended in murder. You can NOT judge a neighborhood by it's racial makeup. There could be African American neighborhoods that are peaceful, and there could be White/Caucasion neighborhoods that are total no-man's lands.
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
12 years ago
By the way, Wrigley Field also sits in a VERY BAD neighborhood. In Chicago proper, anything south of Lawrence Avenue and east of Cicero Avenue is ALL bad neighborhoods, all the way south to the Will County border, and eastward all the way to the shores of Lake Michigan and the west border of Porter County, Indiana. And in fact, between Lawrence and Ogden Avenue, the ghetto even extends farther west, right to Austin Blvd! Within that entire area, it is all very bad, crime and violence ridden neighborhoods.
avatar for 3LeggedMan
3LeggedMan
12 years ago
The overall numbers for crime incidence have nothing explicitly to do with the safety of specific strip clubs. There's a lot of crime that is related to inter-gang turf confrontations and drug dealings within that turf. Neither of those makes Admiral Theatre a more dangerous place per se.
While I disagree with you about the safety issues, you're certainly right about the lameness of Chicago clubs. I used to enjoy Scarlett's, which was downtown. That location is currently known as the Pink Monkey, and I hear it is extremely expensive for low-mileage entertainment.
avatar for jerikson40
jerikson40
12 years ago
"There could be African American neighborhoods that are peaceful, and there could be White/Caucasion neighborhoods that are total no-man's lands."

While that sounds good, and might be true in specific cases, the FACTS are, and the dirty little secret in the African American community that nobody will admit, that based on FBI statistics, "the proportion of African American males ages 20-29 under criminal justice supervision was approaching one in three", and that was over a decade ago as I recall. And at the time it was increasing from 1 in 4 just a few years prior. And by "supervision" they meant either in prison, on probation, or on parole.

Now anyone can twist that however they want to fit their own personal beliefs and what makes them feel good, but when young black males are around there is a VERY good chance there is also a lot of crime.

I can find the link if anyone is interested, but if you look up Sentencing Project you should find it.

So when the cops stop and "harass" young black males, it may have some reason behind it. And when guys like me go thru a black neighborhood and the hair stands up on the back of our heads, it's not because we're racist.
avatar for jerikson40
jerikson40
12 years ago
Oh, and before someone says, "yeah, but whites and hispanics are just as bad..", the comparable rates are:

White: 7%
Hispanic: 12%
Black: 30%

Not even close.
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
12 years ago
To the OP, I'm not disputing some parts of Chicago are unsafe. On the first real warm day this year, at least 20 were shot and 3 killed.

But it's all gang turf on the southside. Not where the strip clubs are.
avatar for smokeybear
smokeybear
11 years ago
@motorhead

You have forgotten about another highly terrorous criminal element that makes Chicago all the more dangerous; the Flash Mobs! Flash mobs are the ultimate urban terror in society. Unlike gang members which often concentrate their attacks on members of rival gangs, flash mobs concentrate their attacks on INNOCENT people ONLY!!! Flash mobs come in All races and colors, they attack in huge groups, even of as many as 30 to 50 people, and they attack like vicious, hungry wolves. AK-47s, TEC-9s, baseball bats, chains, and all! Flash mobs are even highly known to attack Chicago's transit system, too; buses and trains, and they are practically brave enough to be serial cop killers, too! The Flash Mobs attack in practically all areas between gang territories/gang turf areas and the entire Downtown area (including the Loop) as well. Staying in groups offers no protection from flash mobs. The main motives of the flash mobs is often robbery, followed by homicide and assault. They shoot, beat, and then rob their victims and then leave them for dead. Most common items preyed on by the mobs include wallets, purses, ID cards, keys, money, credit cards, cell phones, cameras, and even passports.
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
9 years ago
.
avatar for Hugh_G_Rection
Hugh_G_Rection
9 years ago
Until I see some statistics I think this Flash Mob talk is mostly urban legend This bear dude has been hitting the methamphetamine pipe, he's clearly paranoid.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
9 years ago
SJ Guy is back....who else could write all that??
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
He traveled back in time to 2013? :)
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