So I went to the club last week, had a good time for a few hours then my ATF showed up. I went for some dances for her and they were.... lackluster on this night. Her whole vibe was pretty cold, don't know what's up with that.
Anyways, how many bad nights do you tolerate from an ATF? I'm thinking of the classic 3 strikes and you're out rule.
I've never known my ATF to have a bad day. That's why she's my ATF. She's attractive, but not the hottest or youngest, she just has the most amazing personality of anyone I've ever met. She was a little distracted one night, years ago, but as soon as I asked what was wrong she apologized immediately. She gave me a very brief summary of some family health scare issue, then moved right along to my day. I liked that she shared some of her life with me but I mostly liked that she made an effort to keep the time focused on me. I really feel as if she values the money I spend on her, when most dancers don't.
I have a lot of semi-favorites and the tolerance varies with all of them. If they have three off days in a month, it's one thing, if they have three in three years, that's another. If your ATF is amazing and gives great service with a smile on demand for years, I say cut her a little slack. Also, a cold but polite dance and outright rudeness are very different "strikes" to me.
It really depends on the girl. Some I've given 4 or 5 chances because the mileage was worth it. Others that were marginal to begin with may only get one more shot. For me there is no set rule.
You are paying to be entertained. If she's not ready to entertain you, then she should take the day off and come in when she's ready. Personal issues are no excuse for giving a lackluster performance and taking a guy's money. One strike.
Chemical:
Define a "strike."
I think these are "strikes".
Having a bad night?
Son, that's not a strike, that's normal for dancers.
@pablo
Those that you listed are definitely beyond what I'm describing. No dancer would get even 1 of those strikes from me before I never drop another cent on her.
I'll definitely cut the ATF some slack, hopefully she is back to normal by my next visit.
I have never given her strikes, but I have given her balls.
First off, I agree with RegularJoe: "If they have three off days in a month, it's one thing, if they have three in three years, that's another."
However, a "strike" really entails something more than her having a bad day IMO. With my xATF the "strikes" started accumulating where her drama began causing me drama. In hind-sight she got more "strikes" than she deserved.
Off night is one thing. Disrespect to my face is another.
Once had a former ATF tell a bartender to bring her a drink on my tab... and added the phrase "because he does whatever I tell him to".
I turned toward her and said loud enough so several of her co-workers could hear: "Not exactly, if I did that I'd be her boyfriend who slaps you around, fucks you up the ass and calls you a tramp in public". I paid my tab and left without paying for the drink she ordered, and the next time I was back at that particular club I was getting lappers from other dancers to her icy stares....
If she hadn't chose to try and build up her ego with her co-workers at my expense, she might have been making bank on me for months longer. I don't care how hot or how good the mileage was, her attitude called for an immediate correction.
Every time she fucks removes a strike
Yeah, I'm with gatorfan...they're usually ATFs for the good things they do, not for the bad things they don't do. The amount of shit I've put up with from my 3 favs is beyond ridiculous. And I keep going for some dumb ass reason. Well, not entirely true...I've actually finally written off all three. I no longer have any expectations from any of them and won't make plans with them. If things happen and we hook up like I did with one last week so be it, but I don't schedule around it anymore.
It's relative to me getting my money's worth. Any kind of disrespect is reason to drop her.
You don't owe these bitches any loyalty when they are draining your money.
"For me there is no set rule"
Likewise.
"You don't owe these bitches any loyalty when they are draining your money"
Hmm...A real great attitude. [Sarcasm]
@ Chemical:
I was writing in my satirical mode.
Exactly what Hugh said. It depends entirely upon what the infraction entails. Direct disrespect results in an immediate shutdown. Period. That is simply not to be tolerated.
I'll put up with a little bit of drama if the sex is good, but otherwise my tolerance for someone fucking up my entertainment is also low. I wouldn't say one strike, but the runway is short for that sort of thing.
OTC cancellations where she lets me know in advance that she needs to back out, nights where she seems to be a little distracted, etc., will generally be afforded a little latitude as long as they do not happen too close together and I don't really count strikes per se. If this stuff starts happening with greater frequency, however, it is usually a sign that the jig is up and it is time to find a new dance partner.
Most of the time my ATF is very predictable and we have set limits. She says no DATY when she's having her period - no problem. I met her mother a couple of times when we were trying to get her into detox. We got in a fight/ argument and she called her Mom& said,"You know the guy you like so much? Well he raped me and fucked me up the ass." I got her to detox at 3:00 am and later saw the mother. I said,"what she said was only 1/2 true." That night was almost the end of a long relationship. I don't count strikes but wait to see her demeanor the next time we meet.
1...
... there's no shortage of strippers
I don't have an ATF anymore, but I do have some faves that tend to get most of my money. In my eyes they are all constantly on probation, and any two strikes of deliberate apathy will end the arrangement. I'm a hard ass, but it has to be that way. There are just too many fish in the sea to tolerate laziness or taking me & my wallet for granted one time too many.
I concur with lopaw. Two strikes within a "short" period of time, is all it would take for me to lay off of a dancer for a long while. What lopaw hits on is part of an article I've been wanting to write. Dancers don't realize the value to a customer of even a $20. dance. Just think of in place of spending $20. for a two and a half-minute dance, what else you could do entertainment-wise. Two get into a movie, two hours long, for that same money. Dancers tend to treat us customers as if even $20. is just pocket change.
It would be like with anyone else you hire or work with (mostly). People do have bad days and make mistakes and are imperfect. How do they react to it? Do they acknowledge it and try to make up or are they in denial blaming you, stupid things? Now I say "mostly" since strippers especially love the combo of deception and playing in your feeling of sympathy pity, so you got know how much leash to give each particular one too.
It depends. Sometimes it ends suddenly, like it did with my third ATF, who exhibited obvious personality problems which basically ended our relationship then and there. Sometimes, it just builds up gradually, like with one of my recent favorites. She was nice at the beginning, but the last time I got dances from her, we ended up getting the VIP room instead of the regular lap dance room and she spent most of the time sitting around talking, essentially using the room as an excuse to not stage dance. I told her if she wasn't going to dance, that was it. I mean, I enjoy talking with her, but there's a limit to talking. I'm also glad you can call that club up and have them tell you who's dancing, so that if she's there, I can avoid her.
In the end, mostly, you just know it's over.
I think she's on about 57. Yeah, the sex is that good.
Q How do you know when your ATF's boyfriend has given her 2 strikes? A She has 2 black eyes.
This isn't really an issue with me since I am a dine-and-dash road warrior. I don't even remember much all that much disrespectful behaviour from dancers in clubs.
My Toronto sweetie whom I see a couple of times a year pulls none of that shit on me; not a peep of it during our vacations together in Hawaii.
My favorites come and go. The dancers and clubs are competing for my time and money. If they don't understand that, they lose. I go to where I have fun. I don't have set rules but if I don't have fun or didn't enjoy the experience, I'll start looking somewhere else. Before you know it, you'll never see me again.
Last night I went to a club with a feature entertainer. I initially enjoyed the hot dancers on stage. Then it got boring. Waitresses were not asking anyone if they wanted drinks for the most part in the area I was sitting. No dancers came over and talked even though I didn't even see that many at first. I might not visit the club anymore when they have a feature or leave immediately if I feel bored in the future. The next club I went to, I was asked for triple the amount of dances in under two minutes that I was asked for in three hours at the first club. I spent no money on dances in the first club and over $200 on dances in the next club. I guess I was making up for lost time. I will not stay to see what the feature looks like anymore at the other club. I might not even visit as much.
The underlying situation here is that both strippers and customers are likely to consider shitting on the other as something to be proud of rather than ashamed of. Result: getting a bad dance is something that's much more likely to happen then getting a Big Mac where they forgot to put on the special sauce. You walk into the club, see who's working, and combine together the factors to give each one a score. Is she my type? Is she annoying? What is her reliability history? Then you decide how much of and on who the money in your pocket is worth gambling.
As long as the srikes do not cost much money then she can get 3.
as long as she doesn't take me as a fool!
3 strikes is fair. Everyones allowed to have an off day. Maybe she had more drama going on in her personal live than usual that day.