Comments by DeclineToState (page 15)

OP: ->"I would consider myself very happily married." ->"I occasionally give in and hit the clubs for companionship and bbbjs when I have an opportunity to be away for the night . . . the fear of giving my wife an STD." Others: ->"Best advice is be honest with her about your desires." ->"You are willing to lie to your wife, and put her and your marriage at some risk, in order to have sex with others . . . This is who you are now." ->"I think most married men at some point are unhappy with their sex life even if they are otherwise content. Either you negotiate some form of nonmonogamy or find a safety valve." Degrees of marital happiness is a subjective sliding scale and I won't pretend to know yours or presume to judge it. Me personally, my SC'ing was occasional and with pals when we were in away in an area that had clubs, and my targeted pursuit and high frequency commenced 3+ years ago and corresponded with less than happy period in my SO relationship of 20+ years. The SO sex is fine and available, but the side effect of being with youthful dancers at clubs has been I'm less interested in SO sex at home even though the relationship is now in a happier place. My SO relationship would be 100% over if she were to discover my extracurricular activities or be honest about clubbing desires (regardless of whether just looking, getting dances, or extras). I don't want that, but yet I run those calculated risks - and to rob a term from JamesSD and his "safety valve", these are mine: covered only nothing BB not even BBBJ, primarily when she's out of town or I am, and in the unusual occasion when she's in town and I go then it's cautious as possible with change of clothes before I get home, plausible explanation for where I've been, and no dancer texts on my phone. You say your marriage would be "ruined," and not sure if the ruination refers to getting caught versus being honest with your desires or both. If the ruin means divorce and you don't want that then make your decision to either cease or to run the risk as cautiously as you can in effort to avoid the ruin.

->@bkruined: "Usually I could care less, especially if they are guys." Strip clubs with male bartenders = epic fail on club's part. I go to club to see chicks (preferably hot), not dudes. Good club management is having hotness for paying cover, bartending, and of course dancing and grinding (duh). On the other hand, I've never seen a female floor manager/bouncer, though have seen a female general manager.

I trend toward 2 TL (alcohol serving) clubs in my area, one's a busy club the other not so much. In the busy club, the bartenders don't impact me other than being hot eye candy because there's frequent turnover and they deal with so many dudes they don't remember me anyway. In the slower club though there's 2 that improve my experience because they're hot and we flirt and laugh and sometimes I hit their weed vape pen and they slip me drinks they intend to be free but which turn out not free by my choice because I just give it back in cash tips. One of those 2 hotties slipped me her number for OTC which I was planning to do but then she got a different job and then I lost my phone (no, not in the club) and hadn't backed it up and have missed out on the opportunity - Damnit! I may ask a floor manager I'm friendly with for her number though, he probably has it.

-@NJBalla: "Lol our boy was trending today...." The audience responses to Bilzerian's book-naming twitter link you provided were hilarious, reminded me of the awesomeness of the RoastMe subreddit

^@blah, when you travel dance in Cali, plz let us Californians know

+1 to mark94

Marvin Gaye - What's Going On U2 - Achtung Baby (Unforgettable Fire = close second) Beatles - 1967-1970 (compilation - the blue one) Geez, skibum, do a guy a favor and give us more than 3 @gobstopper: I'd take High 'n' Dry over Hysteria any day @minnow: I'll give GFR's Gimme Shelter cover a listen, the Stones version is one of my favorite songs

->:DeclineToState.... you are gonna need to change your name, you talking more than a group of teenage girls. the is no fucking way you are declining to state anything." Ya, I should probably change it to Won'tShutTheFuckUp or WhyWon'tHeShutTheFuckUp or something like that

^Haha. Well if Dirty Harry says so, I can accept that

And I suspect Trump's narcissistic sociopathy won't be highlighted at his memorial service whenever that might be

Funerals and obituaries trend to saying good things about the deceased, sometimes the lowlights are acknowledged but not often. No reason to crap on Floyd at his memorial, it'll be adequately covered on FoxNews

->"You're being insensitive to those that like New York style" ->"Pineapples on pizza... That's just so wrong!" Someone told me it was wrong to put ketchup on my hot dog and that mustard was sole acceptable condiment. Oh, the insensitivity.

->”Only NorCal clubs I went to that had food service were Gold Club (San Francisco) and Gold Club Centerfolds (Sacramento adjacent)“ Not sure about bow Sacto clubs will reopen. SF is doing the Stages 1 - 4 reopening thing. Restaurant inside dining reopening July 13, bars mid -Aug 15, all subject to earlier or later depending on infection rates. Stage 4 is nightclubs, concerts, sports events. Remains to be seen which one the SF clubs will fall into. Info I’ve been told about GC is it’ll be gloves and masks and no “performances” at reopening - don’t know if no performances means no stage or no dances/rooms or both. Sounds awful. I won’t be going. Or better said if there’s stage I might go and watch and drink I’d go check it out if I were already in SF but I sure as hell won’t make a trip.

-@Papi: "anyone else doing the same thing for a different reason would have gotten the same response." True and good point. I don't know what else he could have done to bring as much attention to his stated cause, though, and that cause (racial injustice) merits lots of attention. Too bad Kaep (IMO) is not a super worthy standard bearer of that cause.

On Kaepernick specifically, though, I respect his right to do what he did but I find him unbalanced, kinda immature, and question his methods and some of his motivations. He had been benched as starting QB during 2015 season for Gabbert who was even worse QB than Kaep. During the anthem of 4th preseason game of 2016 when he did not get the start, he sat on the bench (not kneeled) during anthem - that was stupid and disrespectful. During anthem at 5th preseason game, he kneeled with teammate Eric Reid. I wasn't a big fan of what he did but it was sure as hell better than sitting and the statement he was making merited being made even if I wasn't a fan of his method. Then at some point he said he would continue kneeling until there was change in injustices committed by LE against African Americans and other persons of color (can't remember his exact quote or stated criteria for change, tried to find it but couldn't). He remained backup QB for first 5 weeks of season, then got his starting job back. At some point he resumed standing for anthem despite his stated criteria not having been met. Seems to me there was more to what was going on with his head and his acts than opposing racial injustice (immaturity, job insecurity, inability to mentally and emotionally deal with the simple fact he just wasn't very good and the NFL had caught up to his style of play). OK, amateur psychology hour over.

A flag is a symbol. I love USA despite its shortcomings which are significant, including TFP's statement about blacks being killed unfairly by cops (heck, anyone of any color that gets killed unfairly or discriminated against by anyone in a position of power). But I don't worship the flag though I respect and appreciate what it stands for. As an adult, I find the portion of the Pledge of Allegiance where one pledges allegiance to the flag to be silly. I pledge allegiance to the country for which it stands yes, but the flag, it's a symbol that merits respect but not worship or getting crazy uptight about. And no, I'm not a pinko commie - my father served the entire WW2 on a destroyer in the Pacific theater, he was already in Navy when Pearl Harbor was bombed and the flag the Navy presented to our family at his funeral is one of my most treasured possessions (and yes WW2, he was significantly older than my mother).

Before stewing on it, I'd have to comprehend it first. Is this alcohol induced?

->@mark94: "One of his turd moves was when he threw Janice Griffith ( porn actress ) off a roof. She broke her leg and sued. He’s lucky he was charged criminally." I was unaware of this showboating clown until this thread. Did a little browsing about who he is and saw that Janice Griffith story and also this response letter from his attorney to Griffith's attorney: http://tmz.vo.llnwd.net/o28/newsdesk/tmz_documents/0514-dan-bilzerian-doc.pdf. Total smackdown.

^ In SF, restaurants are reopening for indoor dining **on July 13

In SF, restaurants are reopening for indoor dining, with city moving date sooner or later depending on infection rates. Most or all SF TL clubs have food so I assume they’ll get to open then. Bars set to open in August date TBD. If I’m in area already I’d go for the show and to drink but won’t target a trip til dances are available and no masks required

My first LD was at Market Street Cinema in SF around 2003-04. Took customer to a Giants game and then he took me to MSC which he said was his go to place. Hadn't been to a club since early 90s when in college and that was just drinking and tipping, didn't know LDs existed back then. Customer paid my cover at outside kiosk and before we even walked through entry door a dancer standing between kiosk and door grabbed my package and said come on baby let's go, I thought WTF and had no idea what that might have meant and she wasn't my type so kept walking. MSC was kinda gross, movie theater seating, one dancer on stage, and porno film playing on big screen behind stage. Customer says to me, get a dance you can grab boobs and butt for pretty cheap but didn't say how much. Cute little brunette with natural Cs (my type) comes into my theater row, says wanna dance, I said sure, she rides me clothed cowgirl for a song, I'm grabbin boobs and butt, song ends she says OK time to pay and still not knowing how much an LD costs I fumble for small bills in my pocket, I pulled out a $5 and 3 $1s, she strains to see the bills in the dark and sees the $5 bill, she says nope it's $20 so I pulled out a $20 and took the $8 back. Customer then laughs at me says "ya dude it's $20 and worth every penny, groping for $20 is awesome" (which it is) and then customer handed me some $20s to get more dances. Was fun despite it being a gross place, didn't go to another club for 10+ years until my PL career commenced around 2016. I had no idea of what was going on in SF at Mitchell Brothers during that heyday of early 2000s as Subraman and others describe here, but had I known my PL career would've commenced much earlier.

This discussion brings home the adage "The person that defines the terms wins the debate." It all comes down to how one defines "hero," which obviously in this discussion isn't a generic term. My personal definition is if the act in question falls in your job description in your voluntary, compensated employment it's not heroic - it's your job.

->@skibum: "The cop is a scumbag the protesters and those who support them are in fact, scumbags too and not a bit better. George Floyd was a scumbag and won't be missed; the cop who murdered him (second degree) is a scumbag and should be tried and executed, but won't because its only first degree murder if you're ignint.. He won't be missed. Looters should be shot; arsonists should be shot; those blocking traffic maced and beaten." The intensity of the opinions expressed (shooting looters) sounds a lot like my grandpa. He vocalized many opinions about LE, one of which was that USA should adopt what was then red China's enforcement penalty re drugs (including weed) - that anyone caught possessing any illegal drug should be executed, no questions asked, regardless of whether possession or sale (and not sure if this was actual red China policy, but he was under the impression it was). He was an awesome guy, love my grandpa, but he was pretty extreme on some opinions - I remember him being displeased when I challenged him parroting Reagan's phrase about the Nicaraguan Contras being "freedom fighters" and me suggesting they were corrupt remnants of the Samoza regime. Agree though with the Papi, Eve etc. comments about the violent protesters being stupid and not helping the situation.

SJG: Joined June 2014 335 Discussions 35,529 Comments 0 Reviews Infinity moronic comments about FRMOS

Brilliant