Reviews by CtDan

Lace is open. That is the good news. The bad news is that there isn't a good looking dancer on premises. There was a brutally fat dancer on stage, and she was the only…

The Fifth Alarm has all new rules, just like most other clubs (commonly owned) in Springfield. The heat must be on, because lappers are now bouncer-monitored air dances. Due to this new puritanical approach to…

Kahoots is on a well traveled route in Vernon. Kind of the main drag. You park in a large lot that is shared with a sex toy shop. Upon entry you pay…

Make sure you come well stocked with money - the girls are pros who are exceptional at what they do (extracting more than you expect from your wallet). With that said, once through the security check,…

Pleasant Moments remains consistent. Although in what appears to be a bad neighborhood, it is pretty much non-residential - so it feels safe. Note the bullet holes in the steel awning; that might…

This club opens at 4pm every day. I arrived around 6pm. The door was locked, but I was buzzed in. After a cover and a pat down, I believe I went through…

I visited Bishops on a weekday afternoon for a cheap beer and to see how the club is doing. There were a dozen dancers. Ten of which all fit the same mold; 30-40…

There is nothing spectacular about Peek a Boos, unless you enjoy close to non-contact $25 lap dances. I walked in around 3pm on a weekday afternoon. There was a completely fucked up dancer…

Another pretty brutal visit to Mr Happy's. The most exciting moment was when the bartender unleashed her absolutely amazing set of bolt-ons and bounced around a bit. A big sign announcing that lap dances are…

Yuck. Wandered in on a weekday afternoon, wanting to see how this club has evolved since my last visit many moons ago. It has devolved. There were four dancers (white and hispanic, between fours…

Kahoots has been a bit slow as of late. The dancer's (and bartender), in turn, seem more pushy. I sat down at the bar and ordered a beer. A dancer came over…

The Venus has become quite consistent. It is a dive strip joint, for sure. But, it seems this kind of establishment has a better chance of thriving in this economy. They toy with the…

I think I hit Keepers at the wrong time, perhaps between shifts. It just seemed that there was not a lot of attention to be paid to any patrons at the time - including…

I enjoy this club, which is in a residential-ish neighborhood. They seem to be left alone, and it seems relatively well run. It is certainly safe. There are some nice big-screen TVs with couches.…

Passions is across the street from a gas station. I felt it very wise to tip the parking lot attendant despite the fact he didn't ask. Parking in front of the establishment didn't…

The parking lot is well watched, so I felt safe parking and getting into this club - although the neighborhood is not the best. You pay a cover, but almost anything will get that waived (a…

I did not enjoy myself at Center Stage. Perhaps I caught it on a bad night, or maybe I was in a bad mood, but I didn't really feel welcome. There's a moderate cover and…

I've had the chance to visit this club a number of times this year, and I like it. You can avoid a cover by showing up before seven, and beers are affordable. I've found the…

A $5 cover awaits after 7pm. Before then it is a free to get in. Drinks are moderately priced, and for a buck the dancers will stuff their vagina in your face. There are…

You enter into this former discoteque and pay an $8 cover. In front of you is a horseshoe bar. Two attentive bartenders were working on a Saturday night, and promptly served three $5…

This strip joint has been in operation for decades. It now seems to be run by the Hells Angels. That is good in terms of there not being any trouble. That is…

This club is in a plaza on Woodmont Rd, just up the hill from the truck stops. It is in a former disco from the eighties. Overall, most of the dancers were young and above…

The routine at Teddies has become quite consistent. You walk in, pay a $5 cover, and get frisked. The bouncer now seems to tell you how many girls are working and reminds you…

This place, which is affiliated with PM and Teddies, seems to rarely have dancers, which is disappointing. The last time I walked in, I was quickly informed that "the dancers are at Pleasant Moments," so I…

This is a very below average bar in all respects. The dancers are of below average looks, below average attitude, and below average attentiveness. The bartender was of below average looks, below average attitude, and…