Why young people, especially men, are having less sex

motorhead
Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life
In a recent study, it was reported 33% of all men between 19-24 had no sexual activity in the past year.

I thought we were still in the sexual revolution that started in the 60’s and everyone was getting laid.

Compare that with estimates during WW 2 that 80% of single American soldiers in Europe had sex and 50% of married soldiers

38 comments

Latest

Dolfan
2 years ago
I don't know. But if there are any hot 21-24yr old chicks who need to get laid, I'm willing to do my part.
docsavage
2 years ago
I'm 66. I've seen society become increasingly anti-male over my life. Many young men have decided to check out and no longer do what they did formerly. This was find a girl and marry her plus pursue a career which would make them more attractive to women as potential male providers. This is not a case of male arrested development. This is a rational response to societal changes. Average men have decided the ROI, return on investment, is not good enough to invest the time and effort in chasing after women and have left the dating market.
RTP
2 years ago
I think there may be trends or changes, but I am calling B.S. I have a son in this age group, and I would guess that everyone of his friends has had sex at least once in the past year.
Warrior15
2 years ago
Porn is so easily available. A lot of guys just take the easy way out and do it to themselves.
shadowcat
2 years ago
RTP - how about your son? :)
Hank Moody
2 years ago
What are we comparing? The numbers you gave are 33% having no sex now v. somewhere between approx 25-45% having no sex in the 60’s. Aren’t those numbers roughly the same?
jackslash
2 years ago
We old dudes have to take up the slack.
PinkSugarDoll
2 years ago
The title of the thread starts with the word ‘why’ but….?

We never got the answer…
skibum609
2 years ago
Young people today do everything on-line, as opposed to in-person. Sex has to be in-person, so there you go. From 17-21 I lived in a fraternity. There was no social media and 30 of us shared 1 phone. We did everything in person, so we got laid a lot, a real lot, a real, real lot. WE even had a joke about our promiscuity: What do you call a brother who has sex with 6 or 7 different women every semester? Answer: A homo? The 70s were great, even the driving age was younger. A mere two years after I lost my virginity I had my driver's license.
Tetradon
2 years ago
This is happening throughout affluent societies worldwide.

There aren't the same family/religious pressures to get married and have kids anymore. There are more non-sex diversions like porn, weed, and video games. Young people don't know how to interact with and seduce (or be seduced by) one another like they used to.
ilbbaicnl
2 years ago
We're comparing to guys in a war-torn area, full of women who are not sure where their next meal is coming from? Why not just lament how guys in the US can't get as much sex as in TJ in the Hong Kong club?

Most of us guys are not good looking enough to have a good chance of finding an attractive fuck-buddy. Marriage isn't as easy an option for men now, because that old world, where it was easier for the man to be bread winner, and women were forced to be obedient and dependent, is gone.
rickdugan
2 years ago
===> "Marriage isn't as easy an option for men now, because that old world, where it was easier for the man to be bread winner, and women were forced to be obedient and dependent, is gone."

I'm not sure what century you were born in, but the balance of power in marriages has tilted towards women easily since the early 80s. By that point no-fault divorces were the law of the land pretty much everywhere and women were gaining a lot of traction in the workforce, yet men were still coming out largely on the losing side of custody and alimony disputes.

At least the one thing we still had working in our favor was a cultural inclination towards intact families, but that has largely eroded as well, especially among our uneducated welfare class. It hasn't helped that since the 90s we have made it so easy to get on the government tit for Section 8 housing, welfare, disability, free healthcare and food benefits (SNAP, WIC), which is a big reason why these uneducated single mothers feel perfectly fine with raising kids in broken homes.

Anyway, with all of that said, there are still plenty of people making marriage work. It just takes a little more work to find a partner who shares your values and vision of the future.
Muddy
2 years ago
I think the porn is so good that there isn't the same level of desperation. You don't masturbate for a few days, you start to think differently and you start getting outside a little more.
nickifree
2 years ago
Have you seen these fat-ass obese young women lately? Goodness. I saw a youtube video of high school students. All the girls were obese, while the guys were relatively fit. I guess things are different now, but I and most guys when I was in high school would never take a porker to high school/prom dance.
blahblahblah23
2 years ago
^to be fair most men are completely unappealing too
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
Got a link to that study Motorhead?

Hard to really know what people are doing of course.

Concern about AIDS?

People generally becoming more upwards mobility oriented from the 1980's, Yuppies?

All the relationship advice manuals, promoting neuroticism.

The rise of the Born Again Movement and the Recovery Movement.

Economic fears just pressing people to live more cautiously and more privately.

More people focused on private wealth accumulation and not wanting relationships.

Does the study offer any interpretation?

SJG

White Room, School of Rock
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xh4COKp_…
nicespice
2 years ago
—>“Younger millennials are by far the most likely to be living in a multigenerational household. Nearly one third of Americans aged 25 to 29 do so, with the vast majority living with their parents. “

—>Finances were the main reason to live with family for 40% of survey respondents, followed by caregiving commitments to older relatives. Over half of younger people with lower incomes cited finances as the biggest factor in their decision.


https://fortune.com/2022/03/25/more-adul…

Financial stress is a downer on having enough idle time to look for that kind of thing. Same with lots of people living with their parents, and it can be awkward trying to do activities like sex when living in the same house.

Also, mental health issues are a downer and gets in the way of motivation there. It seems like the youth suicide rate might be finally starting to stagnate instead of ever climbing like it had been since 2007. But there is still a difference between being “well” and “not offing yourself”
https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databr…
skibum609
2 years ago
If all a guy wants is a young girl to fuck and pretend he's hot; he's never going to have a great life. Marriage is more than sex. I love being married. Trying to picture what life would be like without her is more distressing than watching Joe Biden try to form a coherent thought.
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
Nicespice's explanations make a great deal of sense. Economic and family care giving.

Mental Health issues are phantom, and they are simply a product of the above.

SJG
iknowbetter
2 years ago
This is kind of sad, but not surprising. All the hot girls in that age group are fucking older guys who have money. I hear this all the time from younger guys I work with.

But then I tell them to put on a pair of socks, and find some pants that aren’t so tight, and stop complaining about your over entitled life, and how you can’t afford to buy a home because of your BMW lease, and how you want to work from home.
iknowbetter
2 years ago
And by the way, no one is ever going to take you seriously with that man-bun…
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
That's bs. Everyone is fucking . No one cares about loyalty pretty much. You can get sex anywhere for free.
nicespice
2 years ago
Yeah no. There is an age cohort demographic that has a larger sense of entitlement and it’s not young guys.

Club environments that have a decent chunk of customers were born from the 1990s on are SO much easier to deal with and definitely improve the club clientele overall. 😎 And it’s absolutely attitude related. Though it is pretty funny when the old white guy gets mad that I’m paying attention to the group of young guys over him. And he acts like it’s because I’m so shallow, but I mean c’mon the group gave me maybe $40+ for my stage set and you gave me $2 sir. AND they are less likely to want to do the sit and talk thing before dances.

Awkwardly though, looking back at who I’ve actually dated in the past, most were several years older than me though. Idk why, I don’t think I selected for that on purpose?
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
Young women are often attracted to older guys just because of their worldly knowledge and life experience. It is not primarily money. Its about 10% that are interested in a sexual relationship with an older guy. 10% is not all of them, but it is still far more than enough to keep us busy.

They say you can spot them because they are outlandishly dressed.

And in a strip club it will be a lot more than just 10%.

I agree with what Nicespice starts with, the multigenerational homes, and especially young people being priced out of housing, even college graduates.

SJG
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
""This is kind of sad, but not surprising. All the hot girls in that age group are fucking older guys who have money."

I don't think this is generally true.

I think though for economic reasons, many young women have back burnered the idea of real relationships.

SJG
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
Hoes aren't loyal to tricks and sugar daddies. Saying they're taken by old tricks is stupid
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
There are more serving as sex workers though..
DrunkPraetorian
2 years ago
Sex is too risky and dangerous IMO, a simple handjob from a girl is all I seek
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
^ are you like Mr. LDK, seeking to cum in your pants?

Do you patronize AMPs, as HJ is their specialty.

SJG
DrunkPraetorian
2 years ago
I’m thinking about going that route. As of now I just try and get a stripper to help me, but that’s more money
drewcareypnw
2 years ago
I live in a couple of different worlds here in Seattle...

1. big software company that hires lots of weird little geniuses that are good at math and puzzles. These little turds are busy working late and playing video games. They are not getting laid.

2. local music scene, with all the freaks and weirdos that play/appreciate/both local music. These kids seem to be shagging each other rotten. It's also complicated sex: everybody's bi, trans, or non binary, or what ever other non standard shit that has them fucking any/everything. They are definitely getting laid.


I also observe that there are plenty of poly people out here that fuck in the context of way over complicated relationship structures. Plus the swingers and sex club freaks. This is probably more your 25-35 crowd, though.

I do hear from my buddies with high school and college aged kids that they are not drinking and fucking like we used to... so maybe that's the new prude generation. Or else my sample size is small, or the kids are just lying to their parents about it like we lied to ours in the 80s.
DrunkPraetorian
2 years ago
I just can’t seem to be like Mr. LDK, I have tried before but no success. I cannot believe how he’s able to work that to completion, some guys are more sensitive than other, and/or easier to get off. I’ve tried it, going commando, thin pants etc but no luck.
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
drew, that is interesting. Still not sure though that we really know there is less sex.

DrunkP, good, you don't want to learn to prematurely ejaculate.

SJG
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
Sex is easier than ever now a days. I've never seen it this easy
ilbbaicnl
2 years ago
There are a lot of good reasons that people who are not exclusive with each other, and not trying to make a baby, should stick to HJs and clit fingering to get each other to nut. A possible exception is where fucking is actually better with a condom than it would be without, because the guy will come too fast without. But I think that's rare.
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
"fucking is actually better with a condom than it would be without, because the guy will come too fast without. "

Hee Hee Hee

SJG
Tetradon
2 years ago
Maybe it's because I'm more relaxed with a girl I'm fucking without a condom (and never ITC), but I find I last a lot longer fucking bareback. Paradoxical.
ilbbaicnl
2 years ago
I stage tip my favs at least $5, and at least $2 to everyone else as a courtesy.

@nice the pattern I see is that the guys stage tip a lot of singles buy few if any lap dances. But makes sense to swing by their table to make sure they know they're appreciated. If the club allows it, some spontaneous, grindy table dancing may get more singles flowing. I don't get torqued if a dancer decides to roll up on a different PL before me, even if she's my fav. I hope you'll still give us old guys a chance when you're not otherwise busy. I'm not pushy or gumpy, and I don't feel I'm entitled to any chat time along with the time I pay for.
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