Being in the conversation with non-PLs

nicespice
The other day, at my essential employment, my boss (who is the same age as I am) talked about how on his 21st birthday his boss took him to a strip club. All he did was name the club and say it was WILD. I became really focused on work tasks, because I wanted no part of that discussion. šŸ˜…

That club is a place where thereā€™s no VIP rooms and dances are monitored and no-touch rules are enforced. Unless maybe he was referring to the drug usage there? That club has a rep for coke usage, but idk how blatant it is there.

What experiences had you had when hearing about strip clubs mentioned in daily life? Do you partake or avoid it completely?

60 comments

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Muddy
ā€¢
5 years ago
Yes wild certainly has a different definition to non fanatics. And I usually partake in it and try to recruit them for a boys night out with varying results.
FishHawk
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5 years ago
I pretend I have no idea what they are talking about. Most conversations I have heard have been about Sammyā€™s which is downtown. It is the most well known but also the tamest. Almost no contact goes on there at all. It does have pretty dancers though.
gobstopper007
ā€¢
5 years ago
Also Nice I will let you in on a little known secret. Guys will lie and exaggerate to make us look cooler and more macho around other guys. We often have no real.
idea what we are talking about but if nekkid titties are involved then itā€™s all good.

But to answer your question I have occasionally heard some of the younger guys in the office discussing their trips to some clubs around here. Since I have not been to any of those clubs I just listened from afar. Of course I kind of laughed on the inside cause if those clubs were offering what some of them said Iā€™m pretty sure those clubs would have a lot more favorable reviews on here.
doctorevil
ā€¢
5 years ago
If the subject comes up, I don't avoid it, but I don't go into my own sordid experiences. What is considered "wild" is open to a pretty broad range of opinions. If you're a newbie, just seeing a bunch of pretty girls showing their tits might seem pretty wild. As jaded as I am, it takes a lot more than that for me to consider an experience "wild."
Subraman
ā€¢
5 years ago
"Also Nice I will let you in on a little known secret. Guys will lie and exaggerate to make us look cooler and more macho around other guys. "

Oh that's great, gob. Guys, we have to come up with a new secret thing, gobstopper is telling our secrets to, like, anyone
crsm27
ā€¢
5 years ago
It is also funny to hear people talk about "club" experiences. Some an air lap dance is "wild" while others unless they are getting BBFS in the VIP with 7 women and doing lines of coke off each dancer.... then it would be a "tame" night. So it is the eye of the beholder.

Also agree with gobstopper.... some people will either embelish to seem cool where as others will down play so it doesn't sound too "taboo".

A side story that is kind of along these lines. I had a friend tell me about a massage he got. He was all "excited" saying he stripped down to his boxers. I didn't have the heart to tell him when I get a massage I am butt ass naked and hope to get some "extra" activities. But again the massage places I go are not the same one he think about going... LOL
whodey
ā€¢
5 years ago
"Also Nice I will let you in on a little known secret. Guys will lie and exaggerate to make us look cooler and more macho around other guys. "

I've also heard that some guys are even deceitful enough to lie and exaggerate to make themselves look cooler and more macho around beautiful women as well.
twentyfive
ā€¢
5 years ago
^ really?
rickdugan
ā€¢
5 years ago
Your boss shouldn't have been running his mouth in the first place, especially to a "female" employee.

I would have smiled and given non-committal responses. I don't talk about it with anyone in the workplace. for that matter, with rare exceptions, I don't talk about it in any other setting either.

What happens in strip club land, including the hotel near the club, stays in strip club land.
shadowcat
ā€¢
5 years ago
This sounds like some of the posts on TUSCL. :)
BigPoppa99
ā€¢
5 years ago
:)) I ask, what are clubs! lol
gobstopper007
ā€¢
5 years ago
Itā€™s not my fault Subra. She posted pictures of her boobs and talks dirty. Since I usually tip girls who do that I felt like I owed her something
Eve
ā€¢
5 years ago
I don't think I've ever overheard strangers or acquaintances talking about strip clubs.

But there was one time (about three years ago) I was having breakfast at a brunch restaurant in a very nice neighborhood. When they get really busy, they have communal tables open where people can sit and eat, but they'd be sharing the table with strangers. That's where I sat and ate.

A middle-aged couple decided to sit across from me and they were very chatty and charismatic. The topic came up on what I did for work, and I sort of fibbed and said that I was a cocktail waitress at the Doll House. The woman perks up and says that a family friend of hers dances at Wackos and how stupid it's been that they've been getting raided all the time, and how it's lame that adult entertainment is so strictly regulated in Jax... I was not expecting this random couple to be so open minded on the subject. We kept talking and it went from strippers to medical marijuana until I finished my meal and wished them well. I never said that I danced or had a BIG interest in clubs, but it was oddly satisfying hearing their opinions on the scene.
rockie
ā€¢
5 years ago
I don't make the rules about what's an okay workplace conversation, but in the last 22 years that is not a conversation worth having for me personally in any workplace environment. I don't care what people wish to talk about, but I put that conversation in a big pile designated as the - I don't mix business and pleasure.
prevert
ā€¢
5 years ago
Two years ago I would have agreed with this guy that a club like that was ā€œwildā€ so maybe he was telling the truth as he knew it.
wallanon
ā€¢
5 years ago
One guy I know from work whose favorite hangout is a breastaurant I mentioned to I'd been in a couple of strip clubs around town. This was over drinks and he was already pretty trashed. But there's a big difference between yeah I've gone to a titty bar and yeah I've been to hundreds and hundreds of titty bars.
prevert
ā€¢
5 years ago
And thereā€™s an even bigger difference between Iā€™ve been to a titty bar and Iā€™ve fucked strippers on a titty bar couch.
wallanon
ā€¢
5 years ago
"And thereā€™s an even bigger difference between Iā€™ve been to a titty bar and Iā€™ve fucked strippers on a titty bar couch."

I suppose, but plenty of dudes have done that if you go by what gets said around here. Happens all the time...even when the clubs are closed. lol
Player11
ā€¢
5 years ago
For me I donā€™t discuss my SC activity with Co-workers.
Huntsman
ā€¢
5 years ago
I almost always just keep my mouth shut and my ears open when I hear strip club talk in public. I had a buddy recently joke that he thought strip clubs should be considered essential and be opened. He was clearly joking and I just replied ā€œkinda makes sense in a way but I doubt that the governor would agreeā€. Thatā€™s as much commentary as I will offer on clubs in public.
Cristobal
ā€¢
5 years ago
I have plenty of discussions with workmates about strip clubs, I have went out with a few.

Some ask my advice about which clubs to visit for a bachelor or birthday party.

A few of guys live vicarously through me and would ask me about my TJ trips.
DenimChicken
ā€¢
5 years ago
I see no reason to get involved with any discussion around the handful of people that are in 'the know'. There have been times where coworkers - after hours - get on the subject and I just laugh and mention not going in years. They always have horrible club taste anyways!

There was one time though where somebody made a comment that heavily implied they actually do know about local clubs - it took all my strength to not inquire further and see if he wants to join up sometime!
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@nicespice

The situation you described the behavior/incident/conversation, constitute sexual harassment in the workplace.

You should have said to him:

ā€œThat kind of conversation is inappropriate in the workplace. It makes me uncomfortable. Please stop doing it, and I will inform humans resources to make sure you donā€™t do it in the future.ā€

To answer your questions:

What experiences had you had when hearing about strip clubs mentioned in daily life?

None, I work in a professional environment, were everyone is educated about sexual harassment and the consequences.

Do you partake or avoid it completely?

If someone were to bring the subject of Strip Clubs at work, I would be my duty to immediately let the person know that they are doing/saying something inappropriate at work and would ask them to stop and will report the incident to the Human Resources department to have it on record.
max_starr
ā€¢
5 years ago
I couldn't talk with people at work....I'd probably give them a heart attack
I only talk about it to my neighbor, who I've taken on a few crazy escapades...
Where we took out 2 dancers....wined and dined them....went to some bars...then ended up in the girls hotel room and making amateur porn.
No, I work for some real leave it to beavers...They couldn't comprehend or dream of the shit that I've done...and if one of them has, he probably wouldn't mention it either.
The only way I would probably find out was if I accidentally met one of the guys from work with a girl doing some OTC shit or ITC activities.
nicespice
ā€¢
5 years ago
CJ saidā€”>ā€@nicespice

The situation you described the behavior/incident/conversation, constitute sexual harassment in the workplace. ā€œ

It may have technically been inappropriate. Buuut:
1) it was a general group conversation. Not one-on-one
2) There was also, at a different point in time, a group conversation about taking hallucinogens. I think thereā€™s a different mindset going on here LOL
3) If Iā€™m not getting directly hit on, then I donā€™t care. Iā€™ll save the complaints for having an actual problem.
4) I noticed Ricky used quotations when referring to me as a female. I think heā€™s still mad that my dick is bigger than his. šŸ˜ˆ

I see a nice range of responses. Some are much more open than others šŸ˜



rickdugan
ā€¢
5 years ago
===> "1) it was a general group conversation. Not one-on-one"

It doesn't matter. Somethings are not appropriate for work conversations, especially in purportedly mixed company. ;)
BBBC
ā€¢
5 years ago
^^^ Awww, are you mad because nicespice has a bigger dick than you? I think yours is cute and adorable! Cum over and we can play. Bouncer again! šŸ„°šŸ˜šŸ˜˜
Cristobal
ā€¢
5 years ago
@cjkent wrote "If someone were to bring the subject of Strip Clubs at work, I would be my duty to immediately let the person know that they are doing/saying something inappropriate at work and would ask them to stop and will report the incident to the Human Resources department to have it on record."

Really? I could respect not partaking in the conversation but to rat out your workmates...WOW

Real dick move bro.
Subraman
ā€¢
5 years ago
You can't honestly believe he'd do anything else. Totally in character. He's Colin Robinson from What We Do In the Shadows https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Dk1YGQjā€¦
orionsmith
ā€¢
5 years ago
I never found it to my advantage to act like I know much about strip clubs even though coworkers in the past found out. One coworker met up at one club with me couple of times. Showed me pics of girls on his phone he met at parties and asked me if I knew if any of them were strippers as if I would know. Made me wonder what others were saying about me. Smaller companies tend to have more slack work place rules. I'm working at a different place and haven't seen anyone from work at local strip clubs. Not talking about this at work with anyone is fine by me. You never know when someone like a boss could bring up sexual harassment charges or make a new workplace rule if something was said to the wrong person or overheard. Of course if the group is all male and the boss wants to take everyone out to eat at Twin Peaks, I won't say anything except what I want to eat. Hopefully one waitress won't call me by name or wave to me. I can imagine getting questioned.
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@Cristobal

ā€œUnder the UC Policy on Sexual Violence and Sexual Harassment Reporting, employees are obligated to report sexual harassment and sexual violence to the Title IX Director.ā€

We have to be responsible and are morally obligated to protect students and staff.
skibum609
ā€¢
5 years ago
CJ KENT the rat. Unsurprisingly, a progressive. I work in a profession in a progressive state where rats like this are common. It's why I rent staff and represent the working poor who are tough enough to know words mean shit.
Strip clubs cheating etc, comes up alot in the divorce business and everyone knows I go slot and know no details, same as all y'all.
prevert
ā€¢
5 years ago
ā€œThat kind of conversation is inappropriate in the workplace. It makes me uncomfortable. Please stop doing it, and I will inform humans resources to make sure you donā€™t do it in the future.ā€

What if it didnā€™t make her uncomfortable you fucking idiot.
goldmongerATL
ā€¢
5 years ago
Back to the original question, I put on a wild-eyed newbie persona. They are usually not discussing the clubs where I do my serious clubbing. If they want to make a trip, I might tag along.

I did have one experience where I was with a group and they spontaneously detoured to a club where I do go frequently and VIP. Luckily these guys night out trips are night shift and I am a day shift guy. But there were two dancers working night shift that I had taken to VIP in the past. They both picked up on the fact that i was with a group of guys and pretended not to know me. My friends were amazed that I seemed to get better dances than they did.

To the dancers here, do protect a PL's history with you if he suddenly shows up with a group? Assuming the guy is not an asshole where you gleefully out him.
shadowcat
ā€¢
5 years ago
Who is going to stand up and fight for strip clubs if everyone hides behind the fact that they like and go to them?
Cashman1234
ā€¢
5 years ago
If any odd club discussions occur in my office, I slip away quietly, and let them continue their discussions and stories. I donā€™t want to get involved, and I donā€™t want to get in any issues that might require a call to HR.

If I face any direct questions like - have you been to a strip club? I simply say - Iā€™ve been for a few bachelor parties - and itā€™s just not my type of place.
Eve
ā€¢
5 years ago
"To the dancers here, do protect a PL's history with you if he suddenly shows up with a group? Assuming the guy is not an asshole where you gleefully out him."

99.9% of the time when a PL that usually comes alone brings a friend or several, they have already spoken of me to their friends so that there are no surprises or awkwardness.
Cashman1234
ā€¢
5 years ago
Eve - thatā€™s smart. PLā€™s who are upfront, are usually better than ones who think itā€™s ok to surprise a dancer on a busy night - and expect your full attention.

But, I donā€™t know anything about strip clubs. Iā€™ve accompanied friends for bachelor parties. Itā€™s just a little too wild in those places for me.
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@skibum609

Are you getting angry at the comments that represents your conscience instead of accepting that guilt?

@prevert

The OP, @nicespice, clearly said: ā€œI wanted no part of that discussion.ā€ and has the duty, not, the privilege to put that person in his place by saying:

ā€œThat kind of conversation is inappropriate in the workplace. It makes me uncomfortable. Please stop doing it, and I will inform humans resources to make sure you donā€™t do it in the future.ā€

I believe that being ethical means you will do the right thing regardless of whether there are possible consequencesā€”you treat other people well and behave morally for its own sake, not because you are afraid of the possible consequences.

Simply put, people do the right thing because it is the right thing to do.
BBBC
ā€¢
5 years ago
^^^ okay I get it. Nicespice has a dootie to be a tattle tale. Dats rite! She is dumping loads all over her boss! Dootie calls! šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚
nicespice
ā€¢
5 years ago
I want to clarify. I didnā€™t feel as if there was anybody was sexually harassing in any way. I wanted no part of the discussion because I didnā€™t want to accidentally out myself in how Iā€™ve made money for the past four years. šŸ˜‚
Liwet
ā€¢
5 years ago
My direct supervisor said he got dragged to a club once, spent way too much money, didn't have much fun and felt it wasn't worth it. I had to keep my mouth shut for two reasons; our company has an HR department and it's easy to steal massive amounts of money from the company. If my boss or coworkers knew how often I went clubbing but didn't know how much I spent (averaged $140/visit in 2019), they'd wonder where I was getting all that money. They'd probably assume I was spending $1,000 or more each week.

I also don't bother to talk about it much in public because not many people believe you can touch (so I never go into extras either).
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@nicespice

You said:
ā€œIt may have technically been inappropriateā€

Again, you have the moral responsibility and the privilege to put ā€œyour bossā€ in his place, for yourself and any other woman, that might have to deal with him.

What would you have done if you mother or young sister, nice, daughter etc was present?
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@nicespice

You are not supposed to be so blind with denial, fear of ā€œaccidentally out yourselfā€, that you can't face reality.

Wrong is wrong, no matter when, where or who does it or says it."
rickdugan
ā€¢
5 years ago
===> "I want to clarify. I didnā€™t feel as if there was anybody was sexually harassing in any way."

Lucky for him, but the next girl he runs his mouth in front of may feel differently.
skibum609
ā€¢
5 years ago
No CJ where I grew up rats got what was then euphemistically called a "sicilain necktie". Fucking rats deserved to have their throats slit and their tongue pulled out through the slit. Very effective message to vermin like you. I have zero guilt about anything I have done. Guilt is for pussies like you, you fucking rat. SPICE - why justify being an adult to these whiny little bitches. Its about how you live your life, noit how the weak dictate you should.
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago

@skibum609

You are not to be so blind with guilt, denial, racism, and use omertĆ  as an excuse, that you can't face reality.

Wrong is wrong, no matter when, where or who does it or says it."

ā€œSpeak out, but speak out with love and decency and firmness, not with hatred and contempt for our fellow humans.ā€
skibum609
ā€¢
5 years ago
Lmao @ racism - nothing moree than an admission you're a fucktard. What you call wrong, men and women don't even notice, you think skinned pussy. Jesus you are such a sissy you make that homosexual bottom DESERT seem almost like someone who identifies as a man. Love and decency are not human feelings that progressives have so you're just making up shit.
gSteph
ā€¢
5 years ago
I am always amused and distressed by how easily some turn up the hate and contempt for those with a different opinion. Oh, well.

Back on topic, I only discussed SCing with one fellow at work (before I retired), and with one brother. (And I'm open with my wife) Even then, nothing really specific or detailed. Wouldn't bring it up in a group at work, wouldn't be prudent. Wish I had a guy friend to discuss it with, would be fun.
Eve
ā€¢
5 years ago
"I am always amused and distressed by how easily some turn up the hate and contempt for those with a different opinion."

What else is the internet for? :D
gobstopper007
ā€¢
5 years ago
>> What else is the internet for? :D

Porn?!!
skibum609
ā€¢
5 years ago
Well spoken Eve. Some fisherman get people on the hook using the same bait time and time again.
CJKent (Banned)
ā€¢
5 years ago
@Eve

To answer your question:

What else is the internet for? :D

ā€œFor people like ourselves to whine incessantly about menial issuesā€
ā€“ Benjamin Franklin

ā€œThe greatest thing about the internet is that you can quote something and just totally make up the source.ā€
ā€“ Thomas Jefferson

:D
aleccorbett
ā€¢
5 years ago
I get so frustrated when people talk about SCs since they refer to them as seedy and they say that most of teh women that work there are ugly and do drugs. Literally most of the most beautiful women I know are strippers. And many of them have good personalities too.

I also have a lot of people say they just go to SCs unseriously or for shits and giggles and ask "why would anyone spend any money there.". When I say I like it since it is entertainment and one of the few chances I get to interact with many different beautiful women they say ,"Just go get yourself a gf.". But like have they ever tried doing that? SCs take away a lot of the BS and keep things up front. I rather like that than having to deal with flakiness and having to worry about knowing what to say. BUT, admittedly, I have huge confidence issues I ain't solving anytime soon.
rogertex
ā€¢
5 years ago
I think, only 1 in 20 adult males visit SCs regularly (at least once a month).
And all of em are here on TUSCL, so it may seem every guy on earth visits SC like a grocery store.

Majority of adults have been in a SC 3-4 times in their lifetime. First one at 21, next one at best friends Bachelor party and a couple more - divorce party, etc.
Just seeing naked topless dancer is "wild" experience. Touching or being smothered by boobs - a forbidden experience the guy dare not talk!

Hanging around TUSCL threads, the term "wild" can only imply happy ending.
In fairness, TUSCL is also friendly and supportive of Sex Industry, SCs and dancers - and sees them as regular people doing a job.
Player11
ā€¢
5 years ago
I always kept my sc hobby security level 3 (me only) with non project personnel like co workers.
Player11
ā€¢
5 years ago
Female co workers definitely a no no in discussing project activity ( SC or Sugar Dating). That could be twisted, construed to sexual harassment in workplace.
Cristobal
ā€¢
5 years ago
@player11

I discuss my strip club/TJ adventures will female coworkers too, I just tell too many details and they share their dating/clubbing experiences with me, it is called communication not harassment.

Harassment in the workplace is a serious issue but seriously why do I have to hear "sick and vommiting kid" stories and not be grossed out or offended, our world is too sensitive.
Nidan111
ā€¢
5 years ago
Lol. I always engage. Generally, after a 5 minute discussion, they realize that they are talking to a professional strip clubber.
lopaw
ā€¢
5 years ago
There is one guy at work that I share my mongering exploits with. The rest would never in a million years guess that I had ever even been to a stripclub, much less that I was a hardcore monger lol. When the subject comes up I either walk away or keep quiet. Sometimes its hard not to defend the girls and my fellow mongers when we get bad mouthed by ignorant people who think they know it all. It really pisses off those of us that do! :D
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