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Even been called gay at the club?

Avatar for nicespice
nicespice

Just wondering if that’s happened. If it did, how did it happen and how did you react?
——
Recently. I was at a club and there were two patrons sitting together—one was older (I’ll call him O) and one was younger (I’ll call him Y). Y works for O, and they do business travel together. I mostly chatted with O and did a couple of dances, then went back to the bar area. O wanted to take a break, so I asked Y if it was his turn for some fun.

Y: I don’t do dances.
Me: Ah yeah, not feeling it tonight?”
Y: I don’t like this place.
Me: Ah, where do you like? Miami? Tampa?
Y: Haven’t liked it anywhere.
Me: Have you tried the Hunk-O-Mania?
Y: Huh?
Me: Ah, nothing. I’m just joking.
Y: wait, are you saying I’m gay? I’m not gay 😩😡
O: He’s married to a beautiful girl, he’s not gay.
Me: I believe it. Don’t mind me. I’m just being a goof ball.
Y: I am NOT gay. 😡
Me turns to O well I’ll leave you be for now. If you guys are still here, I’ll say hi again.
O: Sounds great. Please do.

I go out and about for another hour or two or so. And go back. O is sitting alone. I greet him again and there’s brief chat.

Me: where did Y go?
O: He’s off getting a dance.
Me: Ah, nice. Shall we go too?
O: Of course.

I do two songs with O. Head to stage. Return and do five more. Y had gotten dances that whole time or at least most of it. I saw Y glaring at me from the corner of my eye when I hugged O goodnight

I’m almost certain I gay shamed him into being another girl’s easy sale for the night. 😇 I guess that’s some good team player stuff right there. Mwahaha

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

LMFAO. Never happened to me.

This reminds me of a time when a buddy came to visit and we planned to go to some strip clubs. He brought a friend. When I met the friend my gaydar went off. We all go to Spyce in downtown Portland and after about 10 min and getting hounded by strippers, the friend said he was "sick" and took off back to his hotel room.

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Avatar for nicespice
nicespice

Clarification: I cut down the conversation for brevity. But I should have included in there that Y was trying to claim he hates strip clubs. But it seems like O does like them and he has dragged Y out before.

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Avatar for Stephanie4life
Stephanie4life

Enough times I wish I got paid to be called gay.

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Avatar for wallanon
wallanon

Only when dancers were trying to use reverse psychology on me, or get me to share why I didn't want lapdances with them.

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Avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen

No but I have said "I'm gay" when I diddnt want to do dances and was just playing around with a hard sales dancer. Reactions from her and her friends ranged from laughter and disbelief to "ok".

But on that note I have heard from girls it's actually pretty common to see gay guys hit the female stripper clubs. I dunno what they do? Maybe they are recruiting for the mandatory dancer GBF.

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Avatar for Icey
Icey

They say it in a derogatory way whej you don't want to spend money on them

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Avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234

I have sweaty thighs - so in the summer I will wear black leather chaps to the club (commando of course). Oddly, many dancers think I'm gay?

Makes no sense to me.

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Avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael

Yep. Same as wallanon. Only as part of the pushy hustle.

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Avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat

I've heard it a lot in clubs in Mexico from fat old whores just trying to embarrass guys that tell them "NO".

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Avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael

Years ago, at the Cadillac Lounge, there was an incredibly pushy dancer who was known for being loud, relentless, and even abusive to guys who turned her down.

She was going after a guy sitting next to me at the bar. I mean, she would not let up, but he was having none of it. Eventually, she let loose with the "What're you, fuckin' gay?" line.

He replied "No. But I can't prove it because you don't make me hard."

She lost her mind in a spectacular fashion. A bouncer had to pull her away.

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Avatar for Nidan111
Nidan111

I’m as far from being gay as one could be, but many gay dudes are always trying to hit on me. Even the Transgendered. Some of those guys are damn scary when they are decked out as females. Scary in that one can’t tell the

Apart from the real thing unless their penis flops out.

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Avatar for PinkSugarDoll
PinkSugarDoll

I have given dances to guys who say they are gay and that was enjoyable for me because each time they communicated that they appreciated me for being beautiful and nice to them. Very nice guys.

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

LOL, yes. Large Marge (actually bigger than me and Large Marge put together) decided I must be gay because I didn't want her sweat slick tits in my face.

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

@PSD it's interesting that a gay man would do that. It's like a straight man getting a dance from a male dancer and appreciating the male dancer for being handsome and nice. As a straight man it's hard to wrap my head around that because I'll rather get a dance from a FUGLY female before I would ever get one from another man. I wonder what compels them...?

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Avatar for PinkSugarDoll
PinkSugarDoll

I get that too Sir, but I could kind of maybe reason that it falls under the category of, females are sensual to everyone. Like, everyone wants to go to the female strip club but even a lot of women are not very into the male strip club. I know I’m not, ew.

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Avatar for Subraman
Subraman

About 6 or so years ago? At a local club, there was a girl well-known to everyone (Cream at CH, for those who are local), who was at this point definitely phoning it in. She supposedly used to be really really hot, and in fact her body still was, but she was aging a bit, and I'd describe her attitude as "sluggish". Anyway, I'm there with my buddy:

Cream: do you want a dance?

Me: No thanks

Cream: do you want a dance

My buddy: No thanks

Cream: .... are you guys gay?

My buddy and I look at each other and start busting up -- literally laughing out loud. An annoyed look comes over her face, she definitely did not anticipate this reaction, and she storms off.

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Avatar for WinningdaChumpsGame
WinningdaChumpsGame

Not wanting dances from nicespice would make me question a guy's sexual orientation too

WCG

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Avatar for loper
loper

No-one's called me gay, but I'm sure that sometimes I'm considered effeminate because I have soft hands and drink wine instead of beer. If I end up getting a dance from a girl who doesn't get me hard for whatever reason, I wouldn't be surprised if she thinks it even if she doesn't say it.

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Avatar for lopaw
lopaw

Yeah I get that all the time! Girls always asking me if I'm gay. Completely baffling. I wonder why they would ask me such a thing?

:D :D :D

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Avatar for DenimChicken
DenimChicken

Yeah but it was weird, the other customer was the one sucking my dick in the bathroom. He's got the gay. Not me.

I've only been asked if gay by ugly women in Dallas that don't understand they are not attractive to every customer. Never in any other clubs/cities.

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

@PSD and heaving FWIW my wife, who is as straight as I am, was willing to get a lapdance from a female stripper whereas I would never want the same from a male one.

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Avatar for prevert
prevert

I’ve been asked. I’m one case hopefully. I had to tell him no. lol

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Avatar for PinkSugarDoll
PinkSugarDoll

Sir, see? My point exactly.

Also the quote about the rocket or cannon, at first glance I thought it said it was from Super Troopers and that changes EVERYTHING lol.

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Avatar for boomer79
boomer79

There have been a couple DJs who would make a lot of jokes about the customers being gay when spending was low. Obviously joking though.

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

@heaving Stranger in a Strange Land was better that Starship Troopers. You grok that?

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Avatar for Longball300
Longball300

Never been called gay but, have gotten hit on by gay men more times than I can count.

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Avatar for doctorevil
doctorevil

Which is better, Starship Troopers or Stranger in a Strange Land? That’s like asking which is better, a T-bone steak or a chocolate eclair?

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Avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi

i’ve been asked if I am gay because I drive a bad ass Prius.

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Avatar for Musterd21
Musterd21

No but I am sure they wondered. I like buying a lady a drink. I have paid for dances only to have the lady sit and drink with me. Sometimes at the end of several songs I get something special like a nice hug or kiss.................

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

I don't think I have had a dancer call me gay. That seems like a good sales technique though. If a guy is questioning his sexual orientation, or even having thoughts of trying out dudes, it may work out well for the dancer. Lmfao

@nicespice. Sounds like he was visibly upset by your joking. You mentioned he was flaring at while you were saying goodbyes to boss man. You probably hit the nail on the head. He may not be gay, but he definitely sou ds like he is questioning his sexuality? Possibly his beautiful wife is a cover to make him appear straight? He may be bisexual or at least bi-curious?

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

His glaring not flaring

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crazyjoe

I did have that conversation with an ex favorite dancer once. She brought up how she did not understand why some guys go into a strip club because they were obviously gay. She wondered what they get out of it and how some of them were putting up a thinly veiled front to try and act straight. After that the conversation went like this...

Me (jokingly)... am I gay and trying to act like I am enjoying the club?

Her... hell no! You are as straight as a guy can be.

Then she paused.

Her... on the other hand your friend (a buddy of mine who also gets dances from her) I wonder about him.

Me... what? You don't think he is straight?

Her... well, not totally.

Me... what do you mean?

Her... I think he has aaah "tendencies".

This was an interesting conversation, because this buddy of mine kept mentioning he was pissed at her for not telling him what she and I talk about when I saw her. I got the idea he was asking her about me and she would not say anything. Smart on her part...

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

@ heaving, if he is not gay at all or has no gay tendencies, what reason does he have to get mad? If he is truly completely straight he would be confident in who he is and have no reason to get upset. The anger comes from incongruent self talk.

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Avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan

Count me among those who has been accused of homosexuality by butthurt or pushy dancers. Similarly, I get called a racist when I turn down black girls. More than once I've been called both at the same time.

I was caught off guard the first few times it happened and tried to "prove" I wasn't, nowadays I just lean in. There's been a few funny incidents where I've been waiting for my fave, who is both female & black, and turn down a few girls who make that accusation only to later see me with her. Once a girl even pulled her aside on her way to me and told not to waste her time with that "broke ass racist faggot bitch"

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

@ heaving... I get what you are saying. Lets analyze this some...

Earlier you said this...

"I have been asked if I was gay once 😁. Below is how it happened.

I was there with a friend, we just wanted to hang out so not much was happening, then a dancer sat on my friend's lap, they started talking and I joined, it went on for a while and it was fun. Then at some point she asked "Wait, are you guys gay?" 😁, I think she asked that because I'm assuming they don't expect someone else from the same group to engage with a dancer who is already in conversation. We laughed quite a bit and corrected her by pointing out that we were just close friends 😁. We were not offended, and I don't think she had an underlying motive for asking it. After that, she complimented us for being nice and upbeat, I actually felt quite flattered because of her comments 😁."

Seems like you nor your friend were offended by the cancer suggesting you two were gay. In fact you found it funny. You seem to be a completely straight guy with no doubts as to your sexual preference for women. You seem comfortable with your orientation and don't seen to have any need to hide who you are so you felt okay with someone asking if you are gay. If you were gay and were comfortable with that, you would have owned that in that moment and admitted or even flaunted your gayness. However, if you were gay or having gay tendencies and have not come to terms with that yet you would have reason to hide the fact and would see questions as to your orientation as a threat and you would become mad and feel accused. Then you may feel a need to "prove" yourself and do anything possible to prove you are straight.

In nicespices scenario, the guy got visibly mad to the point that his friend had to stick up for him and say he had a beautiful wife. He carried that even farther by getting dances from another dancer, and not just one or two by the sounds of it. He got mad, then he tried to prove he was straight by going overboard with getting lots of dances. If he were really trying to play some sort of moral ground, he may have gotten mad, but he would not have tried to prove himself.

Dude was gay. and not willing to admit it yet.

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Avatar for 48-Cowboy
48-Cowboy

NObody calls me gay...

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Avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy

Who would call me gay? Who would call anyone gay at a strip club.

The girls know that I really like them.

Calling someone gay could lead to a 2amer.

SJG

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Avatar for nicespice
nicespice

^ Wow! Yes, I am grateful the man reacted by just merely getting angry and buying a lot of dances from somebody else. Instead of being shot at or having my drink spiked with GHB...

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Avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy

^^^^^^^ People need to chill out at strip clubs. And when women are causing the problem, usually they are dealt with quickly.

SJG

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Avatar for nicespice
nicespice

@crazyjoe good posts. Interesting story there with the dancer and your friend. If I wanted to engage in political trolling, I could chalk up her observations to dealing with Denver dudes 😝 But my serious guess is that strip club and wonky ego behaviors go hand in hand haha.

@PSD the very few times I’ve knowingly encountered gay customers, I’ve had a good experience too. Buying dances for friends and the like 😁

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe

Thank you nicespice.

Good discussion heaving. I like your thought process. Keep up the great posts

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Avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy

Who would be calling anyone gay? Dancers, Staff, Customers?

I can't see any of them doing that.

SJG

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

@heaving don't you think Heinlein explored the diversity of sexual orientation in Stranger in a Strange Land more than in Starship Troopers? I read both in early high school, and it was Stranger that really opened my eyes about sexual orientation and led me on a path to being more open minded and accepting of it, while also realizing that I'm straight. Moreover when you consider that it, along with his other later books, like I Will Feel No Evil and To Sail Beyond the Sunset, it appears he 'evolved' from Stranger into further exploration of sexual orientation and even sex change in the case of I Will Fear. Anyhow, while Starship Troopers was good, I just thing Stranger was his masterpiece and maybe it was because I read it at an impressionable age where I related to a lot of the themes in it on a personal and developmental level.

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Avatar for Muddy
Muddy

I probably have at some point. Giving dancers a no doesn't always end in a rosey fashion.

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Avatar for MackTruck
MackTruck

^^^ DAM THAT SUCKS!

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Avatar for MackTruck
MackTruck

Dey never suspect a shit truck driver of being gay

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Avatar for SirLapdanceanot
SirLapdanceanot

^ LOL she's 💯 straight. 25 years together and still true. But think what you want not knowing her. 🤭🤭🤭

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Avatar for FishHawk
FishHawk

@Muddy, you are right, most of the time a simple “not now” , “maybe later”, or “I am waiting for someone”, buys you some time. But occasionally you get a dancer who won’t leave you alone until you get rude. Sometimes that sets off a reaction which can be loud and unpleasant.

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Avatar for MackTruck
MackTruck

^^^ kick that dancer in the balls fishhawk

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Avatar for MackTruck
MackTruck

🤣🤣🤣

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Avatar for BigDickSammy_
BigDickSammy_

I have been called gay in clubs a lot. I do dance at the gay Club though

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Avatar for Cristobal
Cristobal

I have been called "gay" twice, once when two BGs at HK were offering a threesome and I decided to pass (I am not into threesomes) or tip them one of them said it was because I was not man enough and gay (in Spanish).

Like insulting me would make me want to give them money, SMH.

The second time, I was in the COI hanging out when another customer sits right next to me and makes conversation, because the music is loud he sits rather close and talks directly into my ear asking questions about the dancers and the VIP room, and then he offers to buy me a drink (I pass) and after 10 minutes, he comes in real close and says "I think you are attractive" I tell him thank you but I am here for the dancers.

I proceed to walk to the other side of the room where 10 minutes later I invite a milfy dancer to give me a few lap dances then we ended up in the VIP room and 15 minutes later I walked out a few dollars and ounces lighter.

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Avatar for captainfun
captainfun

that's messed up cristibal. Why would some dude think another guy in a SC would be gay.

That said I was just at a club in Dallas a couple of nights ago. Some guy was looking my way at the urinal for way too long. I figured he was trying to throw off a vibe. I finished and got the hell out. Creepy fuck.

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Avatar for rockie
rockie

It's been suggested by more than one dancer on an occasion when I've declined their offer. Once or twice I may have suggested that if I chose her to entertain me that I might rather be gay as she suggested. One time it did set "Big Bird" off, but her "gay pitch" was never offered at me (or to me) by her a second time and she did remember not to bother me again on subsequent visits.

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