How do you broach the OTC conversation with a dancer?

good question

Girls are too hard to understand, that's why we have entire forums dedicated to figuring out situations like these. Come switch teams! Both men and women agree that men are simple and easy!

You don't need to be coy, Roy. Just ask. I recommend asking politely, so it doesn't make her feel like a prostitute. I ask on the first meeting, after talking a while and maybe visiting VIP. The worst she can do is say no.

Hey, think we can meet up outside sometime?
Or Do you ever meet up outside?

I've only asked a couple of times, and both have been after a successful itc experience. The first one said she was willing to meet up at her house, but I stumbled on better before I ever took her up on it.

Do you do any private shows outside of the club?

I've asked on a first visit, after a few visits and after extended periods. The worsr that can happen is they say no.

I just ask in a non committal way “Do you work outside this club?” If she does otc and you aren’t an Uber-creep - she’ll either say yes or no.

Cashman knows how to do it.

A dancer that has worked a month in a club Is not creeped out when asked.

I usually see her a few times and buy a few dances before asking. Kind of a test drive to get know her and see if I like her. Then I just ask if we can meet up outside

I've asked first seeing them. One Turned into otc for over a year. She was nuts and loved sex. Miss her. Had one other. It can happen. But I think there needs to be a mutual chemistry.

I always wait at least 15 minutes.

Start talking to her right off about things you would like to do with her OTC. Do this within your first 20 words spoken to her. Get her understanding that you will be wanting to see her outside. Let it go real easy. Assume you will be waking up with her the next morning.

SJG

The girls who do OTC are not strippers, they're hoes using a strip club to get tricks. If you want to fuck her, just ask her if she does that. A hoe won't turn you down. If she's just a stripper she'll say no, or will promise it at a future date and just string you along as a regular

If you're trying to date her, then if she finds you attractive she will...

I always treat all women as civilians, and in all situations. So to see a stripper outside, you treat her as a civilian. She still might be getting money. If possible I would suggest giving it to her. But it is Mistress Maintainence, not P4p.

If she wants to make the discussion more P4P, okay, but it comes from her.

Just be natural, just like she was a girl you'd just met at a party. Be open and honest and just start right off talking about things you would like to do with her outside.

SJG

I have buddies who just ask the first time they meet a stripper they like, and I know a lot of guys do that here, too. I only like to OTC with my CFs, so I'll usually have seen her 2-3 times at least, before asking here. Basically, I feel like it's "ask whenever you're sure you want OTC".

As with nearly all negotiating I do ITC, I like to lead, and make things direct and personal. "Will you meet me outside the club?". I make it personal -- since I've put seen her at least a few times and she knows I'm a good regular, I want to make her answer personal and about me, so it's crystal clear my future patronage is at stake. I don't ask things like "do you meet customers outside the club?" because first, it's none of my business if she meets other customers outside the club; second, if she says "no", she's not turning me down personally, she's making a general statement; and third, I feel like I'm being a little bit of a bitch not asking her outright for what I want. None of this might make any difference whatsoever in whether she says yes or not, but it fits my personal style.

Lastly, in negotiating, I never ask her her price or let her name her price first.

^^^^ always a totally civilian interaction, I suggest.

SJG

My approach is similar to Subraman’s. I’ll visit her a few times at the club to determine whether she’s someone I even want to meet her OTC. Sometimes that happens the first visit, sometimes after a dozen. Often it’s dependent on her.

Also like Subraman, I don’t use the third person. It’s all about me and her. I don’t give a fuck if she sees “customers” OTC, I want to know if she’ll see *me* OTC.

Of course, the same is true for ITC stuff. “How do you feel about giving me head?” “Will you have sex with me?” “Will you get naked for me?”

Sometimes, they’ll answer with something on the order of “I don’t do that with customers,” to which I nearly always respond, with a smile, “I don’t care what you do or don’t with anyone else; I want to know about *me*.”

It might be a minor psychological thing, but if you put it in terms of “customers”, she doesn’t have to turn you down, she just groups you in with “customers”, who she doesn’t fuck.

If I ask her about *me*, on the other hand, she’s more likely to address me personally with her answer. That might not make a difference in her answer, but it might the *next* time I ask.

^^^^^^ Totally civilian!!!

Remember, most all of the guys a stripper deals with are guys cheating on their wives, and guys who treat strippers as tainted.

Tell her where you are from, why you are intown, that you want to make some friends. Tell her what you do for a living, if you are in school, ask about her.

You are treating her like an ordinary girl. And that is the key, always treat her like an ordinary girl.

Later you might be inviting her to leave with you, or see you after she gets off.

If she wants to professionalize it, that is fine, but it comes from her.

You can give her money, but never ever try to offer money to persuade her.

SJG

Sounds good, but the more specific info you can give the girl, the easier it is for her to open up.

There are some things a girl will want to know, but knows that on the job she should not ask. So instead you tell her before she asks.

So you talk and talk and she feels like she knows you, and so seeing each other outside is perfectly natural. If she wants to make it P4P, fine, but that idea comes from her.

SJG

Job, income, marital status.

You don't have to tell her directly. I would never tell income amount. But you have to let her come to understand.

The girl only knows what she sees and hears.

Telling her you are their at the strip club because it is fun is more like a brush off.

Don't make her interrogate you. You present info to her as you have rehearsed.

Tell her you are at the club because you like to see beautiful girls in high heels and makeup.

But tell her everything else that she would learn about you on a first date.

SJG

The idea is not really to impress her. It is more just to let her see that you are being open, honest, matter of fact, and that you might like to impress her. That puts you in the top 0.1% of the guys she deals with.

Telling her you are at the strip club because it is fun, tells her that you are a Pathetic Loser.

SJG

On second thought, I just realized I arranged my last OTC with a dancer before I even met her. I only saw her on stage, and asked the dancer I was already with to ask her if she was interested in a threesome. She agreed before we even said hello to each other. So my times have ranged from several hours to negative 5 minutes.

But it is not making an impression on the girl, other than just saying that you are a PL.

You are passing up a chance to tell the girl something interesting about yourself. Why are you in town, and in that neighborhood, and how often will you be there. And you want her to know how you see strippers.

You want to emphasize the beautiful girls aspect. You want her to get the idea that you see her like an ordinary girl.

SJG

Subraman posted: "I don't ask things like "do you meet customers outside the club?" because first, it's none of my business if she meets other customers outside the club; second, if she says "no", she's not turning me down personally, she's making a general statement;"

This. The only girls you take out asking that question are those who will fuck anything with a wallet.

DC, they're good at reading your intentions. You can say whatever you want, but if you're there to feel up a girl, and that's what you're doing... makes it pretty clear to her. You're better off telling her you like tits and ass than acting like a sucker and telling her you think its a fun place.

As I see it, a strip club is just a well oiled machine for separating marks from their money. But the women who work there are completely real, nothing fraudulent about them at all.

So strip clubs are for Chumps. But the women are for Players. Just have to figure out how to select a girl and get her outside ASAP.

Important in this is letting the girl get to know you easily and casually, and always in a completely civilian manner.

Working in the strip club, the girl is in a stigmatized state. You have to let her see and feel that you do not see her as such, not in any way.

I learned this in my first strip club visits, and the first time I seriously tried to talk to a dancer, Sunnyvale Brass Rail, long long ago.

SJG

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It’s not that tough, give them fat tips for extras and the ones that do will bring it up to you.

So you tell her what is so, but you do have a rehearsed way of doing it.

Saying that the strip club is fun just means to her that you are a PL and you see her as something less than an ordinary woman.

There is somthing about it, and by inference about her, that interests you and which opens the door for you to tell her more and make an impression on her.

Remember, you select the girl, the one you want to be waking up in the mornings with.

If a girl approaches you, that is good, but you will still have to decide, and usually quite quickly, if you really want to engage with her.

She has to see what your life is like, and she has to see how you view her.

SJG

If your intentions are fuckboyish, own up to them. They'll respect you more. Otherwise they'll see it as a weakness and see you as a mark

^ Geez fat head give it a rest no legitimate poster pays any attention to a negative no review jackass

Asking her if she’ll meet you outside the club sounds like you’re trying to take her on a date.

-->"Sometimes, they’ll answer with something on the order of “I don’t do that with customers,” to which I nearly always respond, with a smile, “I don’t care what you do or don’t with anyone else; I want to know about *me*.”"

Yep, I do that too.

To bring this point home, all strippers use the exact same tactic. If a hustler stripper is going to ask for a tip, she does not coyly ask, "do you ever tip your dancers?" as if she's afraid to ask the question. She'll confidently ask "would you like to tip me?" or whatever -- she absolutely makes it personal, and it absolutely has a psychological effect on those being asked. All those zillions of scared newbies who tip strippers who they didn't really want to tip, if the stripper gave them an easy out by giving an impersonal, "no, I don't ever tip my strippers", think they wouldn't take it?

From my perspective, you ask it casually. Depending on the reply, the conversation either continues (if she says yes) - or you drop it (if you get a no).

If you get a yes, and she asks for your number, and gives a price, she’s definitely not insulted!

My ATF responded like this when I asked in indirect way.
>>>>>>>>>
Hey you, what do you mean? We can do a lot more at my studio than we can at the club. It's much more private.
>>>>>>

Just ask in a respectful way. I’d say something like “I’m a nice respectful guy who is very safe. If we could agree on the money would you consider meeting me one evening outside of the club.” Worst answer I’ve ever gotten to that question is no.

You should tell her about the life (death?) size Dungeons and Dragons props you have set up in your mother's basement

Then, tell her about your Christian-disemboweling knife, your penchant for restraint sex, your $10,000 worth of chloroform, your 10 mm pistol, your Huffy bike, and, finally, your organization!

Nothing like it to prevent her from thinking you're creepy........ ;-)

For the most part by the time you ask you should have a good idea what the answer is going to be if you've interacted with her.

Part of the reason I sit at the bar is so we can talk over a drink or even over something to eat. It's a natural lead into do you want to meet outside the club.

Lead of by telling her you're a TUSCLer then pop the question and you're in

For one, you've been on TUSCL long-enough, it's usually non-TUSCLarly-educated PLs that have this wimpy/mangina thinking of "oh I don't wanna offend her by asking ..." - as in most things in life, if one wants the right/direct answer, one needs to ask the right/direct question.

I'm not much of an OTCer but one would think asking cold-turkey from a dancer one has just met lessens the chances - i.e. "cultivating" an ITC relationship via several visits may yield better-results but by no-means guaranteed results - there isn't a method to follow which will lead to overwhelming OTC success - as w/ most-things in life, the more you do it usually the better you get at it.

I would assume a PL needs to come across as providing a worthwhile OTC experience - usually that means her thinking you are a worthwhile inve$tment, and her having some kinda comfort w/ you that you're not an ahole or dangerous.

As far as the actual asking, I do essentially the same as Subraman.

I typically see the dancer a few times ITC before asking. That's partially to give her a sense of who I am and what I'm all about. I think that increases the potential for a 'yes' answer. I also do this to get a sense of who she is. I'm cautious about OTC; I won't do it with anyone who I think is lacquered in crazy sauce. Others are more risk tolerant. I'm not.

Also, take a shower, brush your teeth, wear clean clothes, and don't be a prick. That last one is subjective, but the others really aren't.

Get a thousand-dollars in 100-dollar bills - then fan yourself w/ it while telling her "gee I would really like to spend time w/ you outside the club"

Where's the thrill in getting a whore? How many guys has she slept with?

Whoops. My answer above was for a different thread. But shes a whore so shes been asked a million times already. I dont think it matters how or when you ask. The answer will probably be the same.

First night after several dances I have had them offer to go to my room.

There is no reason to talk to a woman like you think money buys her.

SJG

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