Experiencing a Tragedy.

Sorry for your loss, GACA.

I honestly don't know how to respond to this, and to say its sad and sobering is an understatement. Its the shit like this that sometimes makes me what to become a white knight, not for my own selfish reasons, but from a sincere place to protect some of these girls from themselves and their surrounding and enablers. A lot of them are absolutely great, smart people who hit a rough patch somewhere down the line that they couldn't easily recover from but they deserved so much better.

I'm sorry to hear this. Condolescences to you and especially her family.

Thank you @Vince . Again if this was anybody but me I would be wondering what the hell they would be expecting. Still...this hurts. She really was just a nice and smiling person. Hate that drugs can hijack the mind so terribly

That's a tough one bro, sorry for your loss and hope you don't beat yourself up over it. It was not your fault, just bad circumstances, the die was cast before you ever met her. Truly sorry.

I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

What a waste. I'm sorry GACA. I've only known one stripper who died. She was my very first regular. Sweet girl who had lived a very hard life.

Condolences on your loss GACA. The effects that drugs can have on an otherwise great person are truly devastating. About 6 months ago we lost one of our coworkers to a heroin overdose and it shocked our entire office. No one would have ever expected him of being a drug user. He was a 27 year old father of 3 and seemed to be in great shape. Outside of work he was an assistant peewee football coach and very active in a local chapter of the American Cancer Society. It turns out he got addicted to pain pills after a motorcycle accident left him with 3 fused vertibrae and a skull fracture about 4 years ago. After the doctors stop his prescription pain pills he turned to buying them on the street and eventually moved to heroin to treat the pain when his body built up a tolerance to the pain pills. One Thursday evening he took a dose that was too strong for him and he was gone. He had been at work with us less than two hours before his death and he seemed perfectly happy and healthy. He was talking about trying to leave early on Friday so he could be on time for his son's game. Until the news of his death spread that evening no one around him knew that he was using drugs to mask the pain. We knew that he still had some residual pain from time to time but we didn't know what he was doing about it.

Thanks everyone. Hard to talk to anyone outside the lifestyle they're so full if judgement and accusation of me being stupid. They don't understand that you get to know these girls beyond a superficial level. She was a good person with a terrible addiction. For that I'm aligned with Trump and the President of the Philippines. We got to rid hard drugs from our society. Her family is suffering and yes it was her choice, but after a while it really isn't a choice they like making. I'm so hurt. A good person with a serious weakness is gone.

That said I just can't put myself in another position like this one. Getting high rules addicts life, nothing else matters. The night before she said she was the happiest she'd ever been. Now she's dead.

I see self destructive behavior everywhere. I do not understand, I DO NOT UNDERSTAND DRUG USE AT ALL!! I do know that addicts live a roller coaster life like bi-polar people. The highest high followed by the lowest of the low. I have trouble seeing why anyone would even try crack or heroin, do they think everyone is lying to them that it will eventually kill you, period. It is sad but I have no idea how to fix it, I agree with Charles Barkley that dope dealers should be publicly hung in the town square and left to rot! This is what concerns me about legal pot, if the first step is easy(pot) then the next step to something stronger is then to easy. Also pot is many times more potent than is was when I was in college and people around me were "toke'n up" Hell I do not understand smoking pot either, Never Have Never Will - Has no appeal to me: it stinks, burns you lungs and takes days to clear you system! I'll stick to the occasional beer!

Honestly @Tix thank you. I have you on block becsuse some of your comments are just mean ans inappropriate...thank you for being sincere on this. This one... I'm just So goddamn hurt. Hurt.

That sucks, @GACA. I'm sure you will hurt for a while, but I hope you are able to remember how your spending time with her helped her feel better while she was here.

GACA, I hope you're not blaming yourself in any way. But if you are, and you probably are, then find a good counselor asap. You can't save another person from themself. Some of these girls, they are bi-polar, they have used or are on psychiatric drugs, which will totally fuck you up. Then they self medicate with illegal drugs. I'm not blaming the victim. I'm just saying sounds like you immediately got in over your head. You couldn't help that girl, but you can help yourself. I've seen people destroy themselves over things like this, it's like a slow motion multi vehicle pile up. If you need help don't be afraid to ask. And if people are judgemental, tell them to fuck off and talk to someone else.

Getting into relationships is much easier than getting out. With strippers, it can be ridiculously easy, and that's why I tend to ignore the fools who think it's a good idea to go chasing after strippers. The problem with chasing after strippers is that you might actually catch one, and then God help you if you don't have your own shit together. I'm sorry for your loss.

Also, what woodstock said, focus on the joy you brought her while you were together.

@GACA- there are two txtittyfags, txtittyfag and txtittyfagdot. The one that has made fun of you on occasion is the one without the dot.

@Anonlvone really i don't blame myself at all. I am angry At her. I feel a little guilty for being angry at her. But she called someone else to pick her up and take her someplace to do drugs. Im hurt she died alone in some dirtbags home and not surrounded by her loved one. But I'm angry and hurt more than anything right now. Why why why didn't she just go home. Why risk going back to the same jail she just got out of. Why wasn't her family and friend's love and affection enough to have her call one of us when she was feeling the urge to use. I'm hurt. I'm angry. I'm somber ... I'm a lot of things but not blaming myself. I wanted only the happiest life for her with or without me in it.

GACA...I'm sorry this happened to your friend...I know that has to really be tough.

I was chatting with me ATF recently who has been out of the stripper scene for 5 or 6 years now. She actually did go back to school and got her degree and is now in grad school. To me she seemed to be one who really had her shit together. We drank a lot together and she would do the pain pills, on a regular basis I assume. During the chat she told me there were many days at the club that she didn't care of she lived or died, which surprised the hell out of me. We never know what is really going on in these womens lives, not can we really do anything about it.

Go ahead and grieve and hopefully learn from the experience. It is a sobering thought for us not connected...I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you.

Being angry at her is good. Don't feel guilty about that. What you don't want to do, is repress the anger, because then it will turn into depression. So stay with the anger, and stay with the hurt, but honestly one month wasn't enough time for this to ever make sense to you. You don't know what her family really is like. And you don't know what kinds of hurts she may have been trying to forget/flee through drug use. I'm sure she didn't want to hurt you, which is why she didn't want you to know. But just give yourself time. That's the only thing that will really help you.

Condolences man, truly sad story.

Sorry bruv.

Very sorry for your loss GACA.

SJG

Drugs can take over a person and destroy them. I've watched it happen to too many people, including an ex-brother in law. Sorry GACA. It's always tough when a friend goes out that way.

Sorry to hear this, GACA. You are not alone.

Losing someone which whom ones has a connection with will affect anyone - especially if some passes b/f their time; and the younger they are the more it tends to affect us.

Hard-drugs is playing w/ fire.

Back in the 80s my mom had a good-friend whose son that was in his early-20s used to like street racing - he had a suped-up Mustang-GT and one-day had a very bad accident - he ended up w/ head trauma - he kinda recovered but he felt when he used to look in the mirror that he looked disfigured - about a year later after the accident he committed suicide b/c he felt he was scarred for life due to his injuries.

The corollary here is if one plays w/ fire it can def catch up w/ you at some point - this young guy had been street-racing for a few-years and unfortunately it caught up to him.

If you hang around strip clubs long enough, you are going to run into this but it happens in civilian life too. Not drugs but alcohol killed my best friend at 33 years leaving a wife and 4 kids. I still think about him 40 years later.

Take care...

Thanks Shadow... Ya completely just stunned right now.

You're still in shock, which is completely normal. As someone else said, it hits you even harder when it's someone younger, who you thought would outlive you. But none of us really know how much time we have.

GACA, I hate to hear about this. Life's a bitch and it bites us all in the ass at times. I understand​how you feel, angry and hurt. You were much closer to this girl than one I knew who killed herself in a drunk driving accident two years ago. I was just thinking about her a few days ago as I was not far from where she rolled her truck and died at the scene. Only 30 years old and a full life ahead of her. I knew she drank, and suspected she smoked pot, but damn. I've also always wondered if she was actually driving or not? I'll never know. And you will never know why your girl didn't turn the other way and come home instead of an overdose.

No one ever knows where life will take us and those we care about. But hopefully you have some good memories of your time together, even if those memories are limited to mind blowing sex, although it sounds like there were other good times. The hurt will pass and all those good memories would never be there had you not had a relationship with her. The pain is the cost of loving and living. Life would be far less satisfying without it. Easier maybe, but not as satisfying.

I empathize with you, man. I had my own brush with a favorite stripper dying of an overdose, but we weren't nearly as close as you and this girl. During the first half of 2014 I did three great VIPs with a stunning, stacked, stylish stripper in her early 30s. In July, while I was driving somewhere on vacation, she blew up my phone begging me in vain for $1000 to help fund a photography business. By Labor Day she had died of a heroin overdose. I was shocked, even though we weren't all that close, and couldn't even go to her club for a long time. Hang in there, bro!

Sorry to hear about your loss. Death sometimes strikes when we don't expect it. I heard about two teenage girls died at Myrtle Beach recently falling from a hotel. No one knows why. I remember a couple years ago hearing about one of my favorite dancers involved in a car wreck where she got injured and two of her friends killed. I had met one of her friends a few times. I didn't realize she had lived within a few miles from me until I read her obituary. I've read fantasy Novels with a character called Death, dreamed about a character called Death, even dreamed I became Death and took over the job as punishment for pointing out Death to others who weren't supposed to see that. I've seen someone I called Death along with a couple assistants but that was weird because it had to be a dream or vision. In reality it was a large tornado which I could not see at night through the roof.

Anyway sorry for your loss. I've been wondering how long a close relative of mine has to live but none of us knows when Death or change will suddenly strike.

If it makes you feel better, I read a book last year about someone who died getting struck by lightning and came back and described a marvelous city in heaven. It was a major pain coming back alive but apparently he wanted to share his story that there is an afterlife. It is not the end.

Seems to me overdose deaths have been a lot more common in the last few-years.

I've written often about my ATF and her heroin habit many times. She and I have discussed the reality that her next hit could kill her. She, too, has said there are times when she doesn't care if she lives or dies. She has tried to quit more times than I can count. When she relapses she blames herself and beats herself up but keeps going back for more. This time, I thought she'd made it. New friends, new city, new job. 4 months clean and she called me today crying; I'm the only one she could tell; she relapsed 2 weeks ago and has been using 3 or 4 times a day for 14 days. I spent 4 hours with her last week and didn't pick up on anything. We talked for hours and she started calling detox centers looking for an available bed. She wants to try Vivitrol this time but must have all opioids out of her system for 7-10 days before starting these monthly injections. I've been the ultimate white knight/enabler for years and she and I have agreed that whichever of us dies first the other will attend services. One day at a time. Sorry you had this experience GACA

About 2 or 3 years after I graduated from H.S. a young girl tragically died in the school.

The school had either 2 or 3 stories/floors; can't remember now - they were taking pictures for the yearbook and apparently they thought it was a good-idea to go to the roof of the school to take a group pic w/ some students - a couple of people stood on a skylight that was a couple of feet above the roof; as they were standing to take a pic the skylight gave way and the girl fell thru and landed on the metal bars of the stair-case in the floor below and died from her injuries; I think she was only 15 or 16 - she almost took a guy student w/ her as she fell but he managed to not fall in.

I did not know her but it def hit very close to home knowing it was from my school that I went to for 3-years and knowing it was a girl w/ a similar background to mine - and me being young about 20 or 21 at the time it def impacted me.

Sorrybto hear this bro

Sorry to hear about this. I have known of a few who died. None of them I was especially close to, but it hurts all the same. Recently I even heard about the club owner of one of my favorite clubs dying. You never know what tomorrow will bring.

In the clubs in my area, I've actually known a few dancers that this has happened to. I've never understood why they got into drugs or what lead them to even start doing them in the first place, especially the hard drugs. I guess they have their reasons...I've just never understood it.

It's shocking when you go into a place where you know a lot of the people and you ask "how so and so doing?" Or you ask if they are working, and you the blank stare and the "oh, you haven't heard?" line from someone.

sad to hear this GACA. too young. i have concern for some of these girls and the way they abuse themselves. such as one 19yr old girl in las chaveles. beautiful, sweet, and fun... but drinks nonstop, smoking and doing cocaine. i expressed my concern to her... i hope she makes better choices before it's too late.

Sorry for your loss, my condolences.

I am sorry to hear about your loss.