Who has the biggest penis?

My rule: a woman can say anything they want about my dick, as long as they'll put it in their mouth.

I'm not lacking in that area.

Maybe your dick is big but her snatch is not as tight as some others

I can see where that can be an issue @ Follies - there are a lot of black custies there

:)

I certainly don't want to hear about somebody else's dick and I don't want her talking about my dick unless I'm putting inside her.

This has never come up in conversation with strippers but if it did I would change the topic to one of the other dancer's vagina or ass. Maybe even another dancers tits.

Like throwing a hot dog down a hallway

I'm sorry, but all of you hairless apes have tiny penises. Itty bitty. Maybe that's why you're so obsessed with their size. Deep down you know they're tiny. Aah...yup

There was one hairless ape that went by "Long Dong Silver" that had an adequate penis by turtle standards. Adequate, but well below the median penis size for a turtle. Aah...yup

But take heart. Apes have tiny penises. Yours are actually pretty big relative to chimps and gorillas. Aah...yup

And don't worry, I know where I am in the scheme of things. rickthebarnacle reminds me how well endowed he is every time we talk. But he's stuck on the side of a container vessel whereas I can go where I please. Aah...yup

Maybe you should start talking about boob sizes - like "man that stripper over there has some great tits, but don't get me wrong yours are adequate."

When dancers talk about dick sizes to me, they always tell me mine is the biggest they have ever seen.

Q. What do you call a stripper who likes small dicks? A. Your ATF.

^ LOL

The female hairless apes do have big titties. Sometimes I pay a female hairless ape to lie on her back while I put he big old titty in the concave part of my plastron and hump away. Not quite the same as turtlestyle l, but still fun. Aah...yup

My dancers all swear that mine is the biggest.

My dick is bigger than all of yours!!

Yeah, the only place I've gotten compliments w.r.t. my dick has been in strip-clubs.

I know I have a small dick or an "average" dick. But when a woman comments on it..... or talks about other dick sizes.... It a turn off. It is like I don't say your pussy is huge bitch do some Keoghls..... But when they mention it.... the best response I heard was.... yours isn't the biggest but it is the cutest.

But I really don't care as long as it is in their mouth.

Any stripper that talks about her other clients' dicks needs a basic course on customer relations.

My g/f says her H has the biggest dick she's ever seen, but I'm the one that gets to fuck her. So I can handle that!

Three friends--a black guy, a white guy, and an Asian guy--are vacationing in the Middle East. Terrorists kidnap them and take them to a secret location. The terrorists tell them if their penises total up to 15 inches or more they will let them go.

They measure the black guy's penis, and it is 7 inches. They measure the white guy's penis, and it is 6 inches. They measure the Asian guy's penis, and it is 2 inches. Since this add up to 15 inches, they are released.

Back at the hotel, the black guys says, "You're lucky I'm a black guy."

The white guy says, "You're lucky I'm a white guy."

The Asian guy says, "You're lucky I had a hard-on."

Shit, I throw my dick over my shoulder when I walk into a club, that way nobody steps on it.

LOL

I have to wear knee-protection b/c of the wear-and-tare of my dick swinging against my knee - ugh.

Nice one jack

when i did my first VIP at follies a couple weeks ago, the dancer pulled out my dick and said "this thing is huge". she then proceeded to line it up next to her arm......to show me that it was half the size of her arm

now i realize in many cases this is SS, but i am a black guy, so maybe it wasn't. ;-)

Damn GoV, I'm intrigued - post a pic of it

I'm big enough that is a dancer talks about a guy with a bigger dick, it's because he needs to be in porn because he's YUGE!

Wait....maybe I misunderstood when the dancer told me I was the biggest dick ever.......

It would be a safe bet for me to say mine is not the biggest.

I lose.

LOL Bubba

He's clackport, missionary, larry fisherman probably a couple i forgot too.

^^^don't throw me in that, I'm my own man.

I think its rude for her to talk with a mouth full of dick.

I though they all said "o my god its so big!" That is what many always say or they say "you really have a nice one"! I know I am mister average in size so I just smile and say something stupid like it does what is need it to.

You all know the old joke: The slut looked down at my hard on laughing and asked; "who do think you are going to please with THAT" I looked her right in the eye and said; "Me!"

I'm not paying the girl to evaluate the size of my johnson I'm paying her to service it no matter what size it is!

^ well put

I'll admit I don't fit the black guy mold. I'm average in size but I do know how to use it and I've never had any complaints.

youtube.com

"She is still a good lay so I put up with it. Would you?"

I've never had a girl talk like that to me. I'm not big, but I also know how to use it. So when it comes right down to it, girls have always been extremely pleased.

If they started comparing me to other guys, I would not like that.

SJG

My experience is that all guys think they are 8" or bigger online but in the real world everyone is the same size... huffingtonpost.com So it really is how you use it as unless you are a mutant/porn star, you don't have a small or big dick.

When did TUSCL switch sides you gays.

According to the chart posted in the Huffington Post article 0,5 percent have dicks 8" or larger.

Yet every dancer on Stripperweb has a man that's 8 inches or larger. Hmmmm.

Motörhead are you suggesting that those Stripperweb girls lie??????

Blasphemous!!

I don't care for dancers talking about dick size. I do not want to hear any big dick jokes or comments about how big someone else is.

Drink some beer and only get minimal grinding and the dancer in front of me won't ever know my true size because I don't get excited that easy especially after drinking a couple beers. I might have when I was 20 something and new to strip clubs but usually not now.

What did the left ball say to the right ball?

Watch out for that guy in the middle, I hear he is a real dick!

To answer the titular question, it sure as hell ain't me!