Dancers - How to PISS OFF your regular!

avatar for azdd
azdd
On the prowl in Tucson and Phoenix
OK so I'm at my favorite club in Phoenix around dinner time, and I've already had a few dances from some of my favorites. I'm thinking of taking off when I see one of my favorites go on stage, so I tip her and ask her to join me. She has another customer after her stage so I settle into a nearby seat and wait for her to be free. This guy must be a fan, he has her do at least 20 dances. I don't fault her, the guy is spending and waiting is often part of the PL game. Finally they finish up and he heads to the can while she saves his seat. I leaned up to her and said "don't forget me!", she smiles and says of course, she will see me soon. The guy comes back and now they head to VIP! Again, not her fault, the guy is spending serious coin. She misses a stage call while in VIP, and stays back there for at least another half dozen songs. Finally they are out sitting at the bar for a drink. I'm feeling like a totally desperate PL for waiting this long, turning down at least a dozen other dancers, but keep thinking my time is coming to caress that world-class ass of hers while she grinds me to oblivion. He leaves, she heads to dressing room, but tells me she will be right back. Fine, she needs a break and to freshen up. She gets called to the stage again, so I think, finally she will be on my lap in a few minutes. She comes off the stage and sits down with another guy just a few seats away from me! Now I'm pissed. This is a veteran dancer that I've known for a couple of years. I quickly finished the beer I had been slowly nursing for the last hour, stood up and walked out, fuming all the way to my car, and decided to post this rant. Dancers, if you have regulars patiently waiting for you, give them priority. If you have others also waiting, let us know and we will understand, but don't blow off a regular who buys multiple dances every time he sees you! OK, now I feel a little better for ranting, but not much.

65 comments

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avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
9 years ago
He drives a Caddy you fix the Ford.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
Always surprising when veteran dancers so badly mis-manage their regulars. I'm guessing if she had told you up front, "I'm so sorry, I might be with this guy for a looong time, and when he's done, there's another guy who I told would be next in line, so I don't think we could hook up today but we'll make it up next time", you would have been fine? I've had girls run over to me and say, "I can't stand this guy, I can't get rid of him, I'd way rather be with you, but I think he's taking me all night". I know she's lying, but at least she's found a nice way to say that we won't be getting dances, and I should move on.

Then again, it's literally been years since I"ve run into this type of situation ... one of the benefits of going on slow dayshifts, showing up close to the beginning of the shift, and almost always having set up an appointment with her by text earlier in the week...
avatar for 72_os
72_os
9 years ago
The rant reminds me of y i stopped going on weekend nights

I agree with this

Then again, it's literally been years since I"ve run into this type of situation ... one of the benefits of going on slow dayshifts, showing up close to the beginning of the shift, and almost always having set up an appointment with her by text earlier in the week...

Bingo

I love the slow day shifts ...on like a Monday or Tuesday
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
9 years ago
Move around. Its a strip club. She's for everybody.
avatar for azdd
azdd
9 years ago
Absolutely I would have been OK with that, and I've had that situation happen many times before. It's getting blown off (not in a good way) without communicating that is so damn annoying!
avatar for 72_os
72_os
9 years ago
Next time just bring $1,000 in singles and spread it all over your table...that my friends would get her attentions
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
9 years ago
I thought for a second you pissed her off. Time to find other favorites so that they wait until you are free.
avatar for Clackport
Clackport
9 years ago
Nobody ever said dancers were smart.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
9 years ago
The last time I stormed out of a stripclub over something like that was the LAST time that I let myself get that upset over a stripper. I won't let myself get into that game anymore. Seriously - If you want to see her and she's busy with someone else, either go spend time with other dancers there that you'd also like to see, or just leave and revel in the notion of all the $$$ that you saved to go club with again on another day. Yes she was a moron for not handling that situation better, but you can't control her - you can only control your own responses to her.
avatar for Charles Paisley
Charles Paisley
9 years ago
I've got a replacement for her, azdd. Message me for details.

CP
avatar for jackel0001
jackel0001
9 years ago
get another girl. that's all you have to do.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
I don't think I. ever had this happen, but I would've been pissed too if it did happen. I've had regulars who were busy with other customers of course, but I think my girls have always found a way to me within an hour or two if not much sooner..

But, you should have played with some other dancers while hoping that you'd get with her later. Maybe you'd find a new regular friend, maybe you'd end up with a blow job in VIP, but whatever happened you wouldn't just be sitting there watching her play with some whale. I think sitting there watching her made it a lot worse.
avatar for minnow
minnow
9 years ago
The way you described her, I'd wager she has MULTIPLE regulars. I'd also wager that the "other regular" has seen her more often and/or spent more money than you have. Even so, would have been nice to be more on the level with you. I'd try CP's suggestion...........
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
Juice's solution would work too.
avatar for azdd
azdd
9 years ago
Yes, all good advice! It was a total PL move to wait around and storm out. I like lopaw's comment best, remember who controls the situation and how you react to it. Thanks!
avatar for 72_os
72_os
9 years ago
Ago • get another girl. that's all you have to do.

Brilliant idea
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
9 years ago
Similar things have happened to me. I would not respond to a former fav's texts after she treated me badly. All you can do is spend your money elsewhere.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
9 years ago
@azdd: As some have mentioned, don't be a pawn. I'll never wait more than about a half hour for any dancer who already knows I'm a customer for her.. If you find another dancer to pass the time with, eventually the situation will be resolved. She'll either be apologetic and give you the dance of your life, be mad at you so you know she wasn't in to you to begin with, or if she's an air head won't even realize what she's done. If it's either 2 or 3 I say find a new CF.

I've been left waiting too, and now that I think about it I met one of my regulars while I was waiting for someone else!
avatar for jacobs.patrick7
jacobs.patrick7
9 years ago
She's looking for richer customers and "regulars" is not code word for boyfriend/girlfriend.
avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf
9 years ago
Hate it when they pull this crap. Sometimes the favorites are worth the wait so can't blame you for waiting.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
9 years ago
I don't wait for favorites because I know what they do in VIP and I hate sloppy seconds.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
9 years ago
RIL in the glossary.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
9 years ago
Obviously she didn't care whether you were PISSED OFF or not. She had her hooks in some big game and had to leave the small game on the trail. It sucks, but it happens to the best of us. All you can do is to preserve your time (and dignity) by moving on when you are being de-prioritized.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
---> ""regulars" is not code word for boyfriend"

"Regulars" is also not a code word for "piece of shit who doesn't needed to be treated with the slightest bit of respect." Obviously, busy night, without at least one or maybe more higher-paying regulars, and he hadn't bothered to text in advance to see if she was free, of course we all understand why should would have stuck with her whale. But you guys should not be doing backflips to try to justify her behavior from there. OP is a regular, she knew exactly what he was there for, she had multiple opportunities to dothe what any number of strippers who don't treat their regulars like shit do: "hey honey,, this guyi s is taking me all night, I'm so sorry, we'll definitey get together next time." I've had plent of girls say that to me, it's what any decent stripper -- decent person, period -- would do. I've been on the other side very often -- I always take my girls for 3-4 hours straight,so sometimes the girls ask me if they can run off and tell their other regular that she won't be seeing him today. What she did was a cunt move, and only someone who is a walking doormat would accept it.

Again, totally agree he made his own set of mistakes, starting with some dignity-preserving lap dances with a different girl. And totally agree that if she's already there with a far bigger spender,I don't blame her for sticking with him. All she needed toto do is some very minor regular management, and there's no issue.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
9 years ago
Subraman, why does she owe him anything, including coddling him through his feelings of rejection? As you mentioned, it's not like he scheduled time with her. For that matter, it's not like he was there just to see her either as he had just finished dances with other girls.

I'm guessing that the only reason she bothered to say anything at all is that he kept pestering her for dances and I have no doubt that some hang dog looks were also sent her way when she was busy with these other dudes. Maybe she didn't want to deal with telling him "no" flat out and was hoping he'd finally get the hint?

I just don't get the views on here sometimes. The same guys who will bitch and moan about some perceived mistreatment from dancers are the ones who also bitch about dancers trying to play the ownership card. Well, you can't have it both ways. Either we are all free agents ITC or we are not. If you blow off other people because you see something better to focus on, then she should be free to do the same.

I am one of those guys who refuses to be scheduled. I go into a club on any given night not knowing how my visit is going to turn out and I like it that way. If a girl that I like is otherwise occupied, I find my entertainment elsewhere, either at that club or in another club. Simple. I just don't get all of this angst over any one girl and I have zero interest in ever waiting a long time for one.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
9 years ago
I like lopaws response
" you can't control her - you can only control your own responses to her. "
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
Rick, where in the world did you get "coddling him through his feelings of rejection"? Nothing in what I wrote. In any other business but stripping, no one would be making up excuses. If the guy who is going to repair my car is on another job that will take an hour, he'll tell me it will be a while. If he didn't think it would take an hour, but now it's taking longer than he thought -- he'll tell me "hey, this taking longer than I thought ... and oh, there's another customer in front of you". It's not even a good customer service thing, just being a person thing.. She had 3 chances to simply say, "this guy is taking way longer than I thought, and there's another customer in front of you"; instead she tells him she'll be right back, knowing she's not going to be coming back at all. And he's not some stranger, he's a regular of hers? Cuntish.

That said, again, I don't disagree at all that at the point he started getting pissed, it was time to cut bait. He let her have way too much control over his good time. This is supposed to be a fun leisure activity, at least for most of us ... if you get pissed over it, if you find yourself waiting for hours for one, you're not doing things right.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
9 years ago
Rick---> "I am one of those guys who refuses to be scheduled. I go into a club on any given night not knowing how my visit is going to turn out and I like it that way. If a girl that I like is otherwise occupied, I find my entertainment elsewhere, either at that club or in another club. Simple. I just don't get all of this angst over any one girl and I have zero interest in ever waiting a long time for one."

My M.O. is almost the opposite of yours, but in the end, accomplishes the same thing: ensures I have an awesome time and scratch whatever itch I have, without ending up pissed off. In my case, I go in during slow shifts, having already made an appointment with the girl I want to see, and she knows that I'll want her to be by herself when I get there, and to stay with me until I leave 3-5 hours later.

I occasionally do what you do -- just go in with no agenda and look to have fun with whatever rolls my way, but I only do this when I don't have a CF and am on the prowl for a new one. I think the only way of SCing that I hate is to go in, dead set on seeing one particular girl, without having made her appointment, during a busy shift. That's the recipe for azdd's experience.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
9 years ago
This way after many years if I get a dance from my ATF it is because she approaches me, asks if I am waiting for another and if I am not she can sit down if I allow her to. The simple fact is she pulled the same thing on me when just saying she was probably going to be busy all that night would have resulted in me wishing her well and seeing her anther time. She just wanted to make sure that I went with no one while she used me as back up. Hey I get it, just from others now.
avatar for sayeh443
sayeh443
9 years ago
She humiliated you bro.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
9 years ago
The short and sweet advice from all these posts seems to boil down to "get over it." This is *good* advice.

If she didn't sit with you, it's because she didn't *want* to. Whether that's because you're a small fry, or because you smell bad, isn't material in and of itself. If you want to see her, figure out which it is and fix it. Otherwise, get over it.
avatar for funonthaside
funonthaside
2 years ago
So how do you deal with situations where she juggles multiple regulars/customers (to avoid her losing other regulars if dancing exclusively for you), while she gets angry over you dancing with other girls? I believe the suggestion will be "cut bait", but I'm curious.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
2 years ago
@funontheside: "while she gets angry over you dancing with other girls?"

Had a regular extras girl a few years ago who got upset once when I took a different girl back to vip. She asked me "are you cheating on me?" So I asked her, "is mine the only dick you suck?"

She never bugged me about it again.

So as another poster her has posted before, try not to be intimidated by a girl in her underwear.
avatar for Studme53
Studme53
2 years ago
It sucks, but money talks.
avatar for azdd
azdd
2 years ago
This thread was from 2015! Seriously?
avatar for Icee Loco (asshole)
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
For whatever reason she preferred their money over yours.
avatar for funonthaside
funonthaside
2 years ago
"azdd✪✔
Sonoran Desert
9 Minutes Ago
This thread was from 2015! Seriously?"

This topic is just as relevant today as it was in 2015. It's not like it's a discussion about what girls are currently dancing at a certain club.

avatar for docsavage
docsavage
2 years ago
Strippers always have to decide whether they should focus on the faithful regular or the one-time visitor who wants to spend a whole bunch of money on them. I don't get angry if a regular ignores me, but I may modify my behavior and visit her less often in the future or maybe not even visit her at all again. There's lots of things to do in life and not enough time to do them all so I'm not going to spend time getting all angry because a stripper didn't do what I wanted.
avatar for Icee Loco (asshole)
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
It's her job. She's there to make the most money she can.
avatar for sideshow_bob
sideshow_bob
2 years ago
I've noticed a fair amount of irrational behavior from strippers and women in general.
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
2 years ago
"This thread was from 2015! Seriously?"

The Internet never forgets lol...
avatar for booty_lover92
booty_lover92
2 years ago
Don’t know why you guys get upset when these dancers are giving other guys attention you could be giving her thousands per visit and that wouldn’t keep her from spending time with another guy who is also giving her cash. A strip club is not the place for exclusivity. If you want that go to church lol
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
2 years ago
I haven’t had a regular girl in years now but I sorta don’t miss the drama bullshit in the club when it comes to this stuff
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
2 years ago
And the Internet makes it possible for future generations who weren't even here when you posted your rant to excavate its bones and judge you. But alas, because strippery is timeless this sounds like a dancer in 2015 who was trying to make point or to impress someone (who wasn't the op) in the club.
avatar for Icee Loco (asshole)
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
The thread is still relevant today. There are a lot of topics on this
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 years ago
I have to say that the 2022 version of me definitely agrees with the 2015 version. If anything, I probably feel even more strongly about it now.

She didn't owe him a thing and it's not her fault that he kept waiting for her. For all she knew, her next sale could fall through. Perhaps the OP was her small dollar reliable backup plan? Or maybe she hoped that he'd wait it out until the bigger dogs were done eating? Who the heck knows. All we really do know is that management of his time and expectations were his burdens to bear, not hers.

Now cue the "customer service" comments, followed by the one off stories of strippers who "did the right thing" and were ultimately rewarded as a result, lol. I'm sure that many of you have at least one of these wonderfully instructive stories to dust off, but they are one-offs for a reason.

This is a cash and carry business and she doesn't know if she'll even see the OP ever again. Expecting her to deviate even one iota from the path that she thinks serves her immediate best interests is unrealistic. If a girl is courteous enough to go out of her way to do so, it should be considered a bonus.
avatar for azdd
azdd
2 years ago
Thanks Rick for your expert analysis of my experience. My original post was a rant from one night 7 years ago; I’ve long since gotten over it and have continued a great ITC relationship with that dancer as a favorite. Thanks for all the new comments, now let’s let this thread trail off into oblivion where it belongs!
avatar for mark94
mark94
2 years ago
How does someone even find a 2015 thread ? And, why would they bother ?
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
2 years ago
"How does someone even find a 2015 thread ? And, why would they bother?"

There's actually some real gems from way back when. But people keep creating new chaos to mull over so I haven't taken the way back machine in a while.
avatar for dogchain
dogchain
2 years ago
I think some dancers end up taking there regulars for granted thinking they are a sure thing for money and try to get their none sure things in first to maximize profit. My thought is this is a mistake because eventually they will piss of their regular to the point they move on then they lose long term consistent money for some extra money here and there.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 years ago
@azdd: Well, to be accurate, I was actually analyzing her potential thought processes, not your experience. What was happening from your perspective was pretty self-explanatory. 😉

I dislike zombie threads as much as anyone, but I also have to agree with Icee that this is as topical today as it ever was.

She's still dancing 7 years later and you're still seeing her? Well, I suppose this also makes sense from her perspective. After all, if she has enough customers who will tolerate treatment like that and still eagerly come back, no wonder she's still dancing. If anything, this demonstrates that she knew far more about what she was doing all those years ago than the guys who criticized her back then gave her credit for, lmao. 😁
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
2 years ago
Dugan, your just spewing your bullshit and proud of how you arrange imaginary thoughts and put them into words. Next thing you’ll be saying how the St John’s river is so much better and bigger than the Mississippi or even the Colorado, because that’s what you do, or maybe you’ll tell everyone the Jacksonville Jaguars are the best NFL franchise in history because you got free tickets to take your kids to one of their games. Dougster sure had you fingered with that confirmation bias. Your head needs to deflate along with inflation.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 years ago
Mate, you're completely off the rails now. Clearly the New England Patriots are the greatest NFL franchise in history because I grew up there. 😉

But how is it confirmation bias to point out the obvious? Which is of course that the chick obvious knows something about what she's doing if she's made it 7+ years as a stripper. As we all know, only a very small % of girls last that long in this business.
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
2 years ago
I’m sure in your mind that sounded cool to you. Stay in your lane. We all enjoy your valuable input on here, with no sarcasm intended. At least I enjoy the prose anyway.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
2 years ago
^ Greatest football franchise I of all time undoubtedly the NY Giants
New England is only great in the Bellichek, Brady era,
franchises need to have more than one good run to be considered great.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 years ago
Mate: If I want your opinion as to what "my lane" is supposed to be I'll give it to you. Oh and as much as I appreciate your enjoyment of my "valuable input" you're the one who should know his lane and stick to speaking for himself instead of whoever "We all" is supposed to be.

This is a discussion board about strip clubs and this is a topic that comes up time and again. Spare us the OT side rants just because you don't like where the thread is going.
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
2 years ago
This thread has been shit upon and needs to die it’s slow death, so thanks for providing your opinion Dugan and your help in killing this thing. Yiu and Blah have more in common now.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
2 years ago
^ Mate, neither your thanks nor your approval is required. The thread will die when nobody else posts in it, not because you think it should.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
2 years ago
Just a simple thread bump and the Phoenix Federation of Grumps come out en masse? Whoever this funonthaside guy is…well played sir! 😁
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
2 years ago
^^ I’m pretty sure the only ones commenting from Phx is me, so at least you for that going for ya Spice. The OP doesn’t live in Phx, he’s a Tucsonian but I’m sure that doesn’t make it any better for you, does it?
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
2 years ago
The only good run twentyfive has had is when he made it to the bathroom without shitting himself
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
2 years ago
^ look at this I’m all up in your head again, rent free too
LULZ
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
2 years ago
Some subtle irony (perhaps even hypocrisy) here. There are PLs who, consciously or unconsciously, are looking for some roleplay. If she does it once, she may just be probing if you're looking for some "hot stripper is jealous of me" roleplay. If so, and it bugs you too much, you're effectively asserting that only PLs like you deserve to be catered to. If see persists, not picking up on it that she's bugging you, you've got more reason to be torqued.
avatar for Htxx
Htxx
2 years ago
Imo that’s all on you. It’s happened to me occasionally over the years. I look at it as an opportunity to try someone else. I’ve also found women I like better and when I wind up returning the original fav winds up sitting and knows my money is going somewhere else.
avatar for funonthaside
funonthaside
2 years ago
It's simple....they need reliable regulars more than we need them. For every dancer who flakes, there are dancers lining up to take their prior regular's cash. Remember that, and you will be less annoyed when a CF/ATF strays.
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