LDKing

She may be exaggerating those numbers

I call bull shit.

This is shocking.

I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that every guy is different--because I'll never understand how someone can do this from SOLELY lap dances---no matter how many they get in a row.

I second Shadow and GoVikings.

Well we know that Cap'n Stickypants (LDK) can cum from a LD. It is right there in his frickin' handle.

I find LDK's posts pretty frickin' funny. Ain't nobody tells a better jizz in the trousers story than that dude. LDK on Cap'n Stickypants...LDK on indeed!

wtf are you talking about? are you talking about a grown man jazzing in his pants???

so you believe that 60% of guys getting a LD and 100% of guys going into VIP are so sexually, socially, psychologically dysfunctional that they actually jizz in their pants.

maybe the stripper you were talking to chooses to service ONLY the most PATHETIC of PLs.

I know this goes against the law of nature, physics, and experience, but I don't think she was lying to me. In the first place, she had absolutely no reason to lie. She already has my attention and my money, and no answer to this question was going to get her more income or change my view of her in any way. Second, she is that rare, mythical creature -- a stripper who isn't necessarily lying just because her lips are moving. For example, she has told me many things about her private life that I have since confirmed as true.

However, I will concede that she's not the sharpest tool in the shed, so it certainly conceivable that she misunderstood what 60% means.

It has been my experience that your average stripper tends to be very much like your average male, when it comes to ego. Every single last one of them thinks they're the baddest bitch ITC. As a result, some of them tend to think of themselves, and their skills, more than they ought.


It all sounds tantamount to bullshit! Now, that being said, I pretty much get the gist of the discussion but could someone please clarify?:

LDK?
CF?
PL?

Jeez DrPhil...I know you're a old cranky dude that can't "jazz" in yo' pants. Hell...didn't you say something about needing to have a pre-OP trans chick suck on yo' lil' wand dang doodle while another chick dressed as Ilsa, she-wolf of the SS, shoves a loaded Sauer 38H up yo' "asswhole" while screaming "ACHTUNG DUMBKOFF!!!" at the top of her lungs?

Must be sad to need that much stimulation. I bet the only thing that gives you an erection is the possibility that Ilsa's gun will go off while it is up your asshole. Sad :-(

But some folks still find joy in sex.

By way of further explanation, this club sells lap dances in three song sets. So this would be LDKing after a minimum of three songs.

Pole_Dude

LDK -- cumming in your pants from a lap dance
CF -- current fave
PL -- pathetic loser

LDK - Lap dance king which is code for cumin in your pants during a lap dance
CF - I believe is current favorite
PL - pathetic loser

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

Pole_"DOC," and thank you, zipman68 and Ironcat!

Oh, forgot... Thank you too, GoVikings!

LDK is short for @lapdanceking82 a 12 year old boy that posts on this board and cums in his pants at the thought of someday seeing a naked woman

CF is current favourite

PL is pathetic loser epitomized by our resident left-wing goose-stepping george soros accolyte @zipman86 (aka zipperhead, aka comicbookguy, aka KampKommandant)

^^^^
Now this is the kind of erudite conversation we've been missing on here lately

I could see those numbers to be a little inflated but true. I have talked to some dancers who are giving me a great grind and ask why I haven't cummed yet. That is when I tell them I need to have penetration in order to cum....which opens the door to ITC or OTC. But i know many of them work their ass off (pun intended) to get men to cum.

Also you have to take in the fact what type of club is it... older clients or younger. Because an 18 year old who has never been laid might cum from a whisper in the hear and a kiss on the neck. Let alone a good grind.

I would say LDK for me alone would be 100%. Long live the King! Once you LDK you never stop. Just let your mind go there, and dress for the occasion, too. Dark shorts works best, and give a minimum of 15-25 minutes before standing up.

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

LDK- means cumming in your pants from solely lap dances. It's nicknamed that because of a member here named lap dance king who regularly does it

PL- is a pathetic loser

CF- a patrons current favorite dancer

bang69 agrees with shadow

Try liquid lapdance pants

Just stay away from air lapdance. No fun there.

@steve229 dude -- true dat. Ol' Doctor Phil is just a font of erudite conversation.

@DoctorPhil -- what wrong lil' fellah? You sound like you're havin' a bad day. Fanny the Tranny and Ilsa unable to make you cum last night? And after you saved your money for the special session for six whole months? Maybe next time you should hire the trans chick with the Hitler mustache. Dumbkoff!

@Pole_DOC dude -- apologies. I use dude for anybody who is or might be a major dude with half a heart that surely will tell his friends that a minor world that breaks apart falls together again. So view it as a compliment. And don't let DoctorPhil's negativity get to you. Somebody pissed in his Post Toasties when he was a kid and he's been sour ever since.

@CJ dude -- I'm glad you've given up being so repetitive.

So repetitive.

So repetitive.

Shit!

Try liquid lapdance pants

No problem zip...glad to be of service

I prefer liquid L.

bang69 agrees with shadow

I prefer a hot brunette with big boobs named liquid

The average age of customers in my club is like 60, and I would doubt the numbers come anywhere close to what she said.

Once again, I do realize that this site is apparently populated by Viagra-toting, older men who are poster children for erectile dysfunction...however...

As I've said before, if you cannot nut "in your pants" from a very hot girl sliding her hands inside your pants and jacking you off while she grinds her butt on your bone and at the same time you're latched on to her massive tits, and then she flips around and wraps them same tits around your bone and gives you an explosive titty fuck, then I suggest you've got some serious problems.

That my friends is a real lap dance, and if you aren't getting that, or something like it, then you're not getting a real lap dance.

Now, if you insist on believing that guys who cum during a lap dance are only receiving no-touch air dances, and a breeze happens to blow across their crotch, causing them to nut, then you are seriously mistaken. I suggest you visit a real VHM lap dance club.

Sorry to intrude...continue pounding your chests and proclaiming how macho you are cuz you're virtually impotent.

jerikson are you fucking retarded?

A fucking handjob isn't a what LDK is talking about when he talks about LDK'ing I am sure that has been explained to you before in another thread. He is talking about cumming in your pants form a girl only grinding on you.

Not jacking you off, or blowing you, or titty fucking you. I think you have a serious problem of just spouting off shit that has nothing to do with the actual thread.

Jerkoff...go fuck yourself

"jerikson are you fucking retarded? "

And where the hell is Dougster and why isn't he trolling jerikson like he's supposed to??

Criminy, the freaking guy is killing us with his pablum

"I think you have a serious problem of just spouting off shit that has nothing to do with the actual thread."

Huh?? Isn't that the primary rule for posting in this forum? Spouting off shit that has nothing to do with the actual thread? Isn't that what everyone does?

And yes, it has everything to do with the thread. The percentage of customers who nut from a lap dance is the topic, correct? It was based on a discussion with a dancer who said 60% correct? And that obviously has a great deal to do with the type of lap dance performed, correct?

If you assume all lap dances are air dances, but guys are still nutting in their pants, then yes, 60% seems crazy. However, my point is that the 60% figure becomes far more reasonable if you consider that maybe this was a high mileage dancer who knew how to get guys off, and did something between an air dance and what I described.

How do you get it?

“… bang69 agrees with shadow …”


I agree w/ bang69 agreeing with shadow – but who does shadow agree w/ - no one bitches – he is the godfather :)

The “deep subject” of LDKing has been discussed often on the discussion board and time after time it seems to be the exception for members; no where near 60% as can be unscientifically proven via the responses on this thread

Her math...."they LDK 60% of the time everytime."

60% is high. I don't go to the club with the intent to LDK but I see nothing wrong with people who do. If you're spending the money you should be able to get the results you desire.

One of my favorite "no extras" dancers tells me that she has several guys during every shift who LDK. About 1/2 the girls at this club provide extras to regulars so her stats are probably about right. She gives a very high contact nude LD but once again, us old farts generally require a lot more stimulation than just rubbing through the pants. Viagra gets you hard but doesn't get you off. Something like a mouth or a vagina vigorously stroking the ol' man meat will do the trick.

It would seem to me that guys who LDK easily or at least regularly are probably prone to premature ejaculation.

Gawker is right. Viagra gets you hard and makes multiple erections a snap, but you don't cum any quicker or easier than what's normal for you. Too much actually makes it harder to cum in fact, so you need to regulate what does works best for you.

I never LDK; I just stay hard and enjoy the grind. If a hand or mouth is added, I will pop every time.

I'm always shocked and disappointed by the internet tough guys on here. Some of you judge LDK and the rest of us who enjoy a good LDK the way some people out there judge any guy that goes to a strip club. Aren't you a loser for having to pay women to spend time with you and dance on you? There are extremes out there (like people who only get off with golden showers and scat play) that I can't even imagine being enjoyable but there's not need to judge those people. To each there own.

Personally, if the mood is right, and the friction is just right, a decent grind can get me off. Sometimes, all of her grinding and jackhammering don't do shit for me. A lot of it has to do with mood and physical chemistry within your body. In my case, whiskey dick can ruin a lapper!

So, to those of you that enjoy a good LDK....good for you and keep it up. To you internet studs who can't get off....I feel sad for you that you can't enjoy the experience and that you just too cool for school. Maybe you're just seeing the wrong kind of strippers and need to try some lappers from some chippendale's dancers.

I LDK when I read TUSCL – don’t judge me

As a man in *very* late middle age who cums regularly from lap dances, I agree with Prim0, Meat72, and jerikson40, among countless others who think similarly but just don't want to attract comments from the strip club macho men. Examples of this dismissive attitude:

sshrfrsky: "It would seem to me that guys who LDK easily or at least regularly are probably prone to premature ejaculation."

GoVikings: "I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that every guy is different--because I'll never understand how someone can do this from SOLELY lap dances---no matter how many they get in a row."

Based on my own experience and anecdotal evidence, I wouldn't be surprised if 60% of SC regulars expect to climax from lap dances, even if that percentage is [allegedly] far lower among the manly men of TUSCL. Mr. Frsky, I haven't had any problems with premature ejaculation in bed with a real live woman in about four decades, but there's something about a hot young stripper grinding her thong-clad ass and pussy and naked tits on my johnson that gets me off within a few songs the vast majority of the time.

Just a couple of days ago I paid a lunchtime visit to a club on the northwest side of Indianapolis and saw B, a dancer who had provided many "lapgasms" at another club on the southeast side until she disappeared about four years ago. As soon as she got off stage, we went back to the private dance area. My mission (and hers!) was accomplished after two $25 dances, she high-fived me, and I was on my merry way. My point is that if you expect to cum, and the stripper is determined to make it happen, there is an excellent chance that you will.

Not that there's anything wrong with that :)

And another thing: I realize I'm fighting a losing battle here, but given my premise that most strip club regulars expect to get off from lap dances, why do we continue to recognize the ludicrous Mr. JizzPantsKing by naming a lapper-induced orgasm after him? If Lou Diamond Phillips were inordinately fond of being pissed on, would we refer to an orgasm caused by a golden shower (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urolagnia) as an LDP? No, we would not.

do you think you can just take away LDK's title? I think not he has earned it with his antics and stories. They aren't usually good stories, but his new street walker pick ups show promise.

"do you think you can just take away LDK's title? I think not"

Yeah, we're not giving the title to some johnny-cum(in your pants)-lately

I have a slightly different take on the Viagra issue. Yes, technically, all it does is make you hard if the mood is right. However, there is a self-reinforcing aspect also, IMO.

When you've got a rock solid boner in a strip club, and a hot dancer is doing her skilled handiwork and butt work on you, the fact that you have a Viagra-assisted baseball bat in your pants seems to make the whole experience more erotic and exciting, IMO.

So it does, IMO, assist you in getting off. Not directly, but psychologically. Not only does being horny give you a boner, having a boner makes you horny to some degree.

And I also think that when your bone is really hard, it's easier to stimulate because all the blood is flowing and all the touch sensors in your dick are working better than if you're semi-limp.

For me, Viagra really enhances the experience a LOT.

And the whole "premature ejaculation" thing is more of an ego trip than anything. Yeah, if you're an old guy and it takes you 3 hours to finally work up a nut, then yeah, 15 minutes seems really "premature".

Internet tough guys?

Prim0 and MrDeuce,

you guys are too sensitive. i never knocked anyone or said anything negative or put down anyone about cumming in their pants from a lap dance.

i simply said i don't understand how it happens

that's all

Some LDKers seem to have taken offense at the non-LDKers :)

Sure – there are always those TUSCLERs that will mock anything including but not limited to LDKers – but I believe most of the non-LDKers are just a bit perplexed at the LDK phenomenon – I mean – if some of us non-LDKers at least LDKed from time to time; we’d understand the phenomenon I guess – but for many; if not most; long-time SCers; we have never LDKed over the course of our long and illustrious monger careers.

In the interest of full-disclosure – I may have come close but that is probably less than in 5 LDs total of 1000s (assuming no hand or mouth stimulation) – now - I have had incidents of pre-cum (a bit of “dick perspiration); but never busted a nut (aka had an orgasm/came).

"i simply said i don't understand how it happens"

@GoVikings - you already figured it out - they're "too sensitive"

"Some LDKers seem to have taken offense at the non-LDKers"

And that's how schisms start

Well, I'm not sure it's as much of "taking offense" as it is frustration with attitudes and misconceptions. We may not be talking apples and oranges, which leads some to classify LDK'ers as little boys with premature ejaculation problems. Now if I said that to somebody here the whole forum would go freaking apeshit, but if it's the other way around then the LDK'ers are "taking offense".

Anyway, in an attempt to clarify, let me provide a few scenarios so we're all on common ground in the discussion. Let me know if you can nut in the following situations:

A. A very hot dancer is lying on you, facing away, squirming her tight butt on your very rigid bone. You're wearing very soft, commando shorts, and your dick is covered with the fabric, but sliding between her butt cheeks. Your hands are roaming all over her body, and she's doing all she can to make you cum with her squirming and dirty talk.

Question: How likely is it that you can nut in this situation, after, say, 3 dances of this?

For me, personally, if I'm super horny the answer is yes, though everything has to be right, and she has to be intending to make me nut.

B. Same situation, but dancer reaches behind her and slides her hands inside your commando shorts and starts stroking you, using your pre-cum for lube. She's trying very hard to get you to cum, including talking nasty.

C. Same as situation B, but dancer then gets down on her knees facing you and does a combination hand job and titty fuck with her very large tits. She also drools some spit on your bone for lubrication.

Now, to me these are all examples of fairly standard and common VHM lap dance experiences, though C is to be found only in certain clubs or with certain dancers in many clubs. For reference, all three are fairly common for me to experience with multiple $10 or $15 lap dances in local VHM clubs.

Now I don't know if any of that is considered LDK'ing, nor do I give a shit.

From my understanding – “the art of LDKing” is busting a nut *just* from a lap-dance (no hands or mouth involved) – if hands or mouths are used; then yeah – all bets are off.

So IMO – only scenario ‘A’ above qualifies under the internationally accepted “LDK guidelines” – and unfortunately I have never LDKed under scenario ‘A’ (but maybe I have not been sitting in the correct LDK position when getting a LD :)).

Okay, well I'm going to take a wild ass guess that maybe 75% of "young males" (say age 20-35) can nut to scenario A. I may be totally off base on that, but it seems reasonable.

And I'll bet that maybe only 20% of "older males" (say age 40-50) can nut in scenario 1, while maybe 5% of "old males" (older than 50) can nut in scenario A.

I'm totally guessing on that, and maybe I'm way off. But I'd be really surprised if the "average" strip club customer can't nut to scenario A. And in that case, the 60% figure seems very reasonable.

Maybe we should take a TUSCL LDKation survey along the types TUSCLer Jackson Estay used to conduct.

Can anyone explain the process for creating hyperlinks on this forum?

LDK ?
I wish. It takes me time, She is HOT and grinds, grinds, grinds
but Ldk nope.

CrazyJoe - I read about those but ... no store to see them and will not but that through internet. :0 Thanks for the tip.

Pole Doc,
hyperlinks go like this: [url=bla bla bla URL] here [/url]

never tried if it works here. good luck.