Of the all the strippers you have met in the clubs:
a) What % would you say you had respect for? b) What % would you say had respect for you?
I realize that many will be tempted to answer this question with:
a) 0% b) who cares?
and if that's your serious answer fine, but not too many joke responses please.
Thanks, daves
davids: Hard to beleive isn't it.
Actualy davids I don't. If I start seeing a dancer OTC I stop going to the club to see her. Friends don't pay their friends to dance naked for them. Now, I may run into that girl when I'm in the club and I will buy her a drink if we sit and chat for a while but there won't be any dances and, just for the record, the first time this happened to me it was the DANCERS idea, not mine. If you are still buying dances from a girl you are seeing OTC she is not a friend, she is a dancer that you are friendly with. Big difference.
Davids, tell us about your experiences instead of criticizing others' entertainment. We are here to talk about our experience and learn from others. You are here to criticize and not offer anything.
Yoda: Wow, I actually agree with your position on something. That was my policy with strippers too: if they started hinting at OTC friendship stuff I told them fine but then I cease to be your customer. Incredibly effective at getting them to stop their non-sense.
Wow, can't beleive we actually have the same take on something. Incredible.
jctone: I constantly post about my experiences and offer my interpretation of the culture. It's not popular, I know, but sometimes the truth is not popular. It remains the truth nevertheless.
Yoda: you (and FONDL) keeping paying for dances from them ITC the club, right, even if they are occasionally meeting you OTC for free?
Yes, yes, insiders have told me all about this: Sometimes it is necessary to throw a regular an occasional bone for free (usually on a day when they have absolutely nothing planned anyway), but in the end customer pays for the relationship. One stripper put it this way: "I think nearly all dancers end up occasionally having to go out with their regulars once in a while."
davids: your missing the point as usual. Inside the club a dancer is working, that's her job. You pay her to do her job. OTC is another matter. I don't pay a dancer to go to lunch or to the beach with me.
Yoda: I think the fact that you feel you need to pay for friendship says something about you. You ought to work on that.
Like I've said a couple of times before only one stripper I definitely would have wanted to go out with: She got $50 from me (not even close to all my money). Wasn't able to ask her out due to geographical circumstances.
Davids: Why do you care how much I or anybody else spends at a club? It's my money, I work hard for it and when it's time to have a little fun I don't pinch pennies. Maybe it's because I walk out of the club with a smile on my face and not whinning that some stripper got all my money and wouldn't go out with me. Is that what happened to you davids? I can't think of any other reason why you would be so bitter.
Davids is so funny!
Davids doesn't keep his word. He promised to leave the board for a few months. I celebrated and went to the SC. His word only lasted only a few hours because he could not stay away from other board members.
"When I was your age, I had better things to do than post on a strip club discussion board."
Hmmm... Well it's almost to easy to point out the flaw with this logic: They had strip club discussion boards or even an internet 40 years ago?
Anyway, I'm keeping busy working, stuyding, and playing on the internet this weekend, don't you worry about me. (GF is out of town for a bit.)
"I got married and had 2 kids, raised them and a step daughter."
Yep and you ended up marrying a great woman didn't you?
"I am not looking for any kind of serious relationship."
Sure, sure based on your "is the stripper really into me?" posts I REALLY beleive that.
" I am the most eligible batchelor"
LOL! Yeah bitter, lonely old guys really do it for the ladies I hear.
"If you have a problem with that then go find a board for lonesome young guys that don't have a life."
Between work, study, exercise, and girls I would say life is fine. How about for you?
Well let's say you went to strip clubs regularly for 10 years. That's 520 weeks. So if you are spending an average of $20/week that $10k right there. I let the readers of this board judge for themselves whether or not it's likely that yoda is spending more than an average of $20/week.
davids: I knew that would be your response! I don't spend nearly as much as you think but it's irrelevant anyway. SC's are my chosen form of entertainment. People have all kinds of hobies that they spend there entertainment budget on. Mine happens to be strip clubs. I know guys who spend 10,000 dollars a year on country club memberships or docking fees for their boats. What's the difference? You would probably be shocked by how little I spend on many visits. Of course, the truth is often surprising.
"Meanwhile years go by and I continue to meet beautiful, intelligent women in strip clubs and have a great time with them simply by respecting them and their need to earn a living. "
And it's only costing you what? Tens of thousands of dollars. Surely an admirable acheivement.
Davids: I've never back peddaled. My position on this board has been the same since before you probably knew it even existed. Other people have come and gone on this board promoting your opinions and resorting to the same sort of personal attacks because I simply won't change my mind. Meanwhile years go by and I continue to meet beautiful, intelligent women in strip clubs and have a great time with them simply by respecting them and their need to earn a living. My stance is simply not to buy into the kind of sereotypes that you continue to present here. Not that both good and bad dancers don't exist. Unlike you, I happen to beleive that the good ones are the vast majority but, since neither of us has anything to go on other than our own experiences and mindsets there is no basis for your opinion to be any more credible than mine. As far as other posters go, let them speak for themselves. I'm not really interested in what YOU think they are saying.
Yoda: because you back peddle: You will try the position most favourable to strippers that you can advance e.g. they are normal girls with normal demographics no stastical differences from other groups.
If on some board nobody challenges you on that then you are fine. If you start to lose however, then you gradually fall back to weaker and weaker positions. Also you are never proactive about admitting anything bad about strippers, you basically only do it when you are cornered.
Hence you have little credibility and I am sure you will realize it's not just with me who thinks that way.
Oh, wait, that's the old davids talking... I forget everything you say is gospel to me now. Scratch my whole post.
Davids: You keep missing the part of my posts where I agree that some strippers are all of the bad things that you say they are. My point has always been that I simply avoid those women, as I avoid all bad people, and stick with the ones I like. Why is that so difficult for you to grasp?
a) 80% b) 90%
If you treat strippers with respect, you generally will get respect back. There have only been a couple strippers that didn't do that.
davids: How do you know you are a regular? Unless you mean regular douche bag. Then I would agree you qualify!
I pretty much agree with clubber. There are very few dancers who I have gotten to know well enough to even consider this question. Of those who I have known well I'd say all but two in both categories. Two turned out to be losers, but I don't really disrespect them, I just feel sorry for them. For the ones who I have only met briefly, I neither respect nor disrespect them, I don't know them well enough to categorize them in this manner. And I'll go along with Yoda too for the most part. I've been pleasantly surprised what nice people an awful lot of strippers turned out to be. Until I got to know some of them well I hadn't expected that. Years ago I had biases similar to Davids' but I found that to be wrong.
Almost impossible to answer. Your question relates to having "met" a dancer in a club. Just seeing them in the club is hardly meeting them. If you include social contact outside the club, and I don't mean just for sex, then I've only met one. That rating would be:
100% 100%
Yoda: u come here as a disingenuous, ass-kissing apologist who will is in total denial about reality.
Why don't I worship strippers like you do? Think it could have anything to do with all the lying, stealing, and scamming they do?
Oh wait you think they don't do that, so of course it's imcomprehensible to you. Or maybe you don't really think that but that's just your public opinion.
Sometimes I really think you must have some money or something at stake in the whole venture to be as dishonest and disingenuous as you are.
Davids: Why do you have to bait people? I come here to excahnge opinions. I stand by my opinions and sometimes the exchanges become heated. You posted an interesting pole here and the responses have been interesting as well. Why can't you stick to the issue at hand. Your presence here seems to be all about bating people and looking for fights. Why are you so angry? Why do you hate strippers so much?
Did Mouse really say "many strippers are troubled people with sundry issues, and many are flat-out dishonest and manipulative - qualities I can't respect." or did RL hack onto the board to make it look like he has more support for his side than he really does?
Yoda, time for you to come the rescue of the strippers of the world! You better do some grade A ass-kissing to get them out of this jam!
Actually it really doesn't matter because I am looking for entertainment not a friend. I tend to respect them all because I think it is a very difficult job. As for who respects me maybe 2 out of 3 because I try to respect them and generally you get what you give,
Of the all the strippers you have met in the clubs:
a) What % would you say you had respect for? - about a 1/3rd I respected after I got to know them. But, many strippers are troubled people with sundry issues, and many are flat-out dishonest and manipulative - qualities I can't respect.
b) What % would you say had respect for you? - over 90%, after they got to know me. I have also been forthright with strippers, paying my tab and being certain I was clean and polite. I alway make'im earn their pay and don't let them rip me off. Moreover, I avoid becoming a RIL or an ATM for these ladies.
I think Yoda is on the right track, but I'd separate respect and courtesy even more. My opinion is that we should be courteous to everyone, even those we may not respect, but respect needs to be earned. I think we use courtesy and respect as synonyms, which they are not. On those lines I'd say that I'm courteous to about 95% of the dancers (some just don't take a hint sometimes), and maybe 70-80% are courteous to me. As for respect, I'd say I respect all my favorites and am non-judgemental about the ones I don't know well enough to form an opinion, but have a certain disdain for a few others based on what I do know. On that basis I'd revise it this way:
Respect a) 10% b) 10%
Courtesy a) 90% b) 70%
I don't see it that way. I respect everyone until they give me a reason not to. That's just the way I think. OTOH, a dancer is at the club to make money, first and foremost. She sees you as a mark before she sees you as a person. Once you invest a few bucks and conversation ensues, you may like her and she may like you. At that point it becomes possible to forge a customer/dancer relationship that can be built on, among other things, mutual respect. A smart dancer, one who wants to build her business, will treat you with courtesy from start. The rest comes later, with time.
No, just because a dancer has low regard for me does not mean that she is correct.
I don't personalize the transaction. I get what I am looking for. I'm not buying respect, so I don't feel cheated when I don't get it.
A) 85% B) 50%
Although it should be noted that B has gone up from about 20% recently, due to club selection.
I see where this is going. For most customers, the two numbers will be inversely propotional. Therefore, we're all suckers and getting ripped off.
It's a little tougher call for me. While there are a lot of strippers that have the usual stripper shit problems (single mom, drugs, deadbeat abusive boyfriend, etc) I still haved some empathy for their situation. As for their opinion of me, I think I am well liked because I make an effort to be nice to and tip everyone. If I'm seen as a sucker, I think they know better than to let me know, so that one is tough to judge also, but there are occasional tip-offs. My best guess:
I respect about 60% Probably 60% respect me, or at least try to give the impression they do. If I had to guess I'd say maybe 40% actually do like me as a good customer and the rest will just work it for the tips.
a. 75% b. 15% (I get more "respectful vibes" from the waitresses and bouncers. Maybe they have more practice)
A. 60% to 70% B. 10% to 20%
A) I would say 70% B) I would say 30%
A. 60 to 70% B. 40 to 50%
a: 100% I know, kill me. b: 70% He, I can play too!
a) 75% b) 25 % Really.
a: 75% b: 20%
Yoda, your position on this one surprises me. I've found that it can work quite well to be both friend and customer. In fact I like that situation, I find that being a friend makes being a customer more enjoyable. But I think it takes a special kind of girl to me comfortable with it. Do you really want to penalize a girl financially for becoming your friend? I don't.