how to spot a fellow tuscler in the club???

dalex
I make my guesses every time I'm in the club.

Creepy old guy with the smallest skinniest girl in the club = I assume Alucard.
The dude tipping $1 on stage trying to get the absolute most mileage out of it = Juice

38 comments

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Dougster
12 years ago
Only guy wearing a suit in a dive club then doing a "yes" and asking for a high five - "it's the damn suit, I tell you!" - when one of the girls agrees to OTC with him = RickBoyDugan putting "The System" to good work

Guy offering the $10 BBBJTCCIMWS to guys to pay off the margin debt he incurred shorting treasuries 2009-2012 = txtittyfan

Guy complaining to the strippers how dark, bleak and dreary the world is in general and muttering "fuck this. fuck that. fuckin' fuck everything!" = the jestie-girl

Guy not there because he is the gay bath houses instead = homothehut (jabthehut)
zipman68
12 years ago
Do you ever feel we're too harsh on the Drac-a-roo? I mean really, a battle of wits with that dude doesn't feel right. Sort of like a gunfight with a dude who doesn't realize he has a cap pistol in his hand. Drac-dude would be sort of cute, like a 5 year old trying to have a deep conversation with the adults, if he wasn't irritating.

But, alas, he is irritating. Drac my man, STOP sending PMs about how good it feels to put sharpies up your pooper. I'm cool with you doing whatever crazy shizzle you want as long as it doesn't hurt anybody. But I don't want a running narrative via the Internet of how you feel when inserting things in your ass.

Just stop. You're embarrassing yourself.
dalex
12 years ago
This is a honest observation honestly, but yes, I am expecting a PM now.
jackslash
12 years ago
You can spot me easily. I'm the creepy old guy sitting at a table right by the stage. I'm the reason this area is known as perverts' row. I have a beer in my hand and a busty stripper on my knee. Preferably the stripper is a blonde who is less than half my age. But you better ID me quickly because I'll soon disappear into VIP where I'll be defiling innocent young dancers.
Ermita_Nights
12 years ago
The only guy who is surrounded by hot chicks but is not a drug dealer would be Shadowcat.

The guy with the steel-toe boots and wads of cash is Farmerart.

The guy presenting an engagement ring to Bella at Bogart's is Vincemichaels (sorry VM, just kidding).

I'm the guy sitting at the bar showing the bartender how to make a proper cocktail.
motorhead
12 years ago
The guy with a wet spot on his crotch.....

Oh, TOO EASY!
Hugh_G_Rection
12 years ago
This time I think I'll just be the fly on the wall.

Invisibility has its privileges
vincemichaels
12 years ago
LOL, Ermita_Nights, that wasn't me. I'm one of the guys up in the VIP. The guy that gave the ring to Bella is in the final stages of the various VD's she gave him.
Club_Goer_Seattle
12 years ago
I'm the one with a girl's big natural boobs stuck in his face yelling, "Help, help. I'm stuck, and I can't get out. (And I don't want to get out, either. Heh, heh.")
GoVikings
12 years ago
Motor- lolololol good one man, hopefully lap dance king reads that haha
3LeggedMan
12 years ago
I'll own up to being the mid-50s white guy at a table near the stage with one or more tiny black spinners in my lap or a nearby chair.
canny
12 years ago
I'm the guy pulling up to the door giving one or more strippers a ride in to work, dropping them off, driving around the block, and coming in 5 minutes later so they don't get in trouble for coming in with a customer. Except for one club where the manager and valet's know that without me some of the dancers wouldn't make it in to work.
JuiceBox69
12 years ago
Lol....very good
tumblingdice
12 years ago
Alutard! I do believe they are calling your name.
tumblingdice
12 years ago
Hey Ermita! You got something on your nose.
Clackport
12 years ago
I'll be the mid 20's black guy trying to get the hottest girl in the club back to my house.
gatorfan
12 years ago
Shit stains on the clothes
sclvr5005
12 years ago
I'm the 6'4" skinny white guy ducking underneath everything.
staxwell
12 years ago
The old guy with the all access pass hanging from his neck, and the T-shirt that says "I'm A VIP Player!", sharing wallet sized photos of every girl his payed for sex, and passing out cards from all the "secret players clubs" he's a part of. Guess who?

The guy in the corner slapping his limp dick around and yelling "wake up damn it!". Guess who? (sorry, dalex)

The skinny old guy wearing a red wig, and a trench coat? Under the coat he's wearing a small shirt that says "If you DRINK you're a terrible person. But I'm not judging.". Guess who?

Pale sun deprived guy with puffy red eyes, complaining to the strippers how dark, bleak and dreary the world is in general and muttering "fuck this. fuck that. fuckin' fuck everything!", wearing all black with a long black trench coat and black eye-liner. Guess who?
Clackport
12 years ago
Lol Stax
farmerart
12 years ago
What's the matter with steel-toed safety boots?

Gives me an edge in a scrap with a bouncer.
zipman68
12 years ago
^^^
If Tony Stark wasn't wearing groovy armor, he'd be wearing steel toed boots. And if it is cool enough for Tony Stark, it is cool enough for anybody...
SketchinGuy
12 years ago
I'm easy to spot: The only man in the whole place with a sketchpad, doing gesture studies, with a different stripper stopping by my table every 20 minutes & sitting on my lap to check out the art.
jester214
12 years ago
This only works if you're in whatever club is closest to U. of Washington dorms.

Find the nerdy solo white kid regurgitating whatever they heard in Psych 200 that that day: you've found Dugly.

*Doesn't work all the time, as a student Dugly doesn't get to go to the clubs much.
duomaxwell
12 years ago
I'm the dancer in the bathroom texting my latest flame that he'd better have dinner ready when I get home.
Clackport
12 years ago
Lol Jester, so true.
Dougster
12 years ago
Looks like ranuky is pretty enamored by the jestie-girl now, even though jestie thinks nukey is a complete fraud. Oh how the times they have a changed!
motorhead
12 years ago
The guy with an 1960's Detroit muscle car in the parking lot: Lots of us I'm guessing
Dougster
12 years ago
Didn't alutard drive a corvette back during his mid-life crisis days?
mikeya02
12 years ago
^^^^ Ice cream truck
Clackport
12 years ago
We all know Jester is a hater, but at least he's not a nutcase like you Dougster or should I say txtittyfag.
Dougster
12 years ago
Oh, he's a nutcase with all his paranoid conspiracy theories, and since you have come to believe them, what can we conclude about you?
TortillaChip
12 years ago
A nutcase could be defined as an Internet "stud" who wants everyone to believe the hottest strippers in a given club often go home with him, for free, to fuck his brains out because he has a big dick but little money.
Dougster
12 years ago
I liked nuky better when he could think for himself, but I guess tittyfag got him to crack with comments about his poorness and blackness, so nuky now nuky is just along with what everyone else thinks to fit in (and to get into jester214's pants it seems.) I'll give him the benefit of the doubt re: banging strippers for free since he has never been caught in a lie AFAIK (even if he won't grant the same to me). He is about one step away from me disliking him though.
goodsouthernboy
12 years ago
I'm the one sitting at te bar in the middle if the afternoon sipping a coke bc I have to make it to an appointment in 2 hours.
jester214
12 years ago
Lol
rell
12 years ago
its funny i have been to clubs and then seen a review where the person was there the same time i was still couldnt figure out who it was

but ill be the short muscle head black guy with the long goatee that barely sits down when hes not having a LD sorry got a little bit of ADD staying still irks me even in my 30s now
WOODDR2
12 years ago
I'm always on the look out for lopaw every time I'm in a club during the afternoon. I figure she should be pretty easy to spot out.

I figure that I'll just send over a drink or a dancer with a lap dance on me.
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