tuscl

Top Ten Things I hate in SCs....

Thursday, February 7, 2013 12:00 AM
This is my personal list of things that will make me mad for the rest of the night in Strip Clubs. I know that these may not bother everyone, but I know a couple of these will bother some of you. In no particular order. 1. Pushy Waitresses- I understand that its your job to ask about drinks, so you can possibly get tips and all, but if I told you 5 minutes ago that I don't want a drink, what makes you think my mind has changed in the last 5 minutes? If you want a tip, just say so, I may be inclined to give you a dollar to have, after all, I am in a strip club and in a giving mood. 2. Dishonest Dancers- Look, lets be real with ourselves here. I'm here to get a service, you're here to provide that service. Now the definition of this service you are providing could be extremely different from my definition, and there's nothing wrong with that. But just keep it real and tell me. My favorite dancers are the ones that either tell me from jump street "Dance is x amount of $, I don't do this, I don't do that, and I don't do this for any amount of money." I respect that! At least I know up front, and I'll tell you either yes, or no. Girls that tell me "We'll see what happens" or "You won't regret it" and then I get over there and it's nothing impressive will highly piss me off. If I'm paying for VIP with you, I'm expecting some mileage. You don't have to go all out with extras, but to not off any? That's a good way to lose repeat business. 3. Stuck-Up Dancers- As a person, we all want various levels of respect, and dancers are no different. And I think that respect will get you a lot further with a girl than treating them like shit. That being said, this is a two-way street. If I am respecting you as a person, you should give me that same treatment. As a black person, there's nothing that makes me more upset than the clubs here in TX where a lot of the girls only gravitate towards white boys (whether they have money or not). I don't care what color I am, all of my money is still green with dead Presidents on it, so what does it matter? Or just the girls that don't talk to anyone, and will just walk through the club doing their sets till they get to go home. You made the choice to be a stripper, so why not make as much as you can doing it? 4. Overpriced cover- At some point, you should recognize who and what you are. There is no what that if your club is not top tier, you should charge top tier price. Dallas, Vegas, ATL, and Miami can charge 20,30 or 40 bucks to get in, and people will pay it, because they're appealing to the high rollers. And that's fine and dandy. But if you're not a high roller club, expecting people to pay those exorbitant prices just to get in, and not even beginning to count drinks, tips and dances is insane. Know who you are, you'd be surprised how much more business you can get if you just cut cover a bit. 5. Guys that tie up a strippers time all night- Look, I know that taking a stripper home with you (especially for free) is the American dream. I know that you think that if you can spit your best game to her, she'll go home and give you the ride of your life for free. But at the same time, catch her outside the club. Do that stuff on your own time. Some of us would like to pay for a dance. If you're negotiating price, fine, but that doesn't take a half hour to an hour. Either get the dance or don't, but stop tying up her time forever and a day talking. If you're that sad and lonely that the only person in the world you can get to listen to you is a stripper, then you have more problems than going to the SC can solve. 6. Stripper BFs- Dear sweet baby Jesus, this pisses me off! First of all, you get to see her at home naked for free, so why in the bluest of blue hells do you feel the need to be at work with her too? Don't you have enough? Secondly, do you not trust her to not do anything you wouldn't approve of? If your relationship is so rocky that you have to follow her to work and be there all night to make sure it meets with your approval, you have some serious control issues. Get over yourself. You may end up cheating her out of more money she could've gotten and given to your loser ass later. 7. Rocks- It pisses me off to see these guys in the club that do nothing but pay the cover. The point of a strip club is for both the club and ladies to make money. If you're just sitting there on your wallet and never tip anyone, never drink or do anything else, then WTF are you doing here? That makes no sense to me. Tipping and contact with the stippers and VIP dances are the most fun to me, so why are you just sitting there doing nothing? If your friends dragged you in, then fine, I suppose. That makes sense. But if you came on your own to do nothing but not be at the house, that's just dumb in my opinion. 8. Seeing girls get nothing- I understand only having a certain number of dollars and wanting to make sure that they only go to what you most want to spend them on, but it bothers me seeing the girls that can actually dance not make ANY money. This is probably a by-product of me going on weeknights, but if she can somewhat dance, and is even moderately attractive, I always try to throw her something at least. Seeing a girl dance for no one is just sad. 9. No effort Hot girl- Just because you're in the 9-10 range, doesn't mean you shouldn't try to at least dance somewhat. I understand that you're hot. I understand that with some guys that's all it takes for you to get paid. But you should at least make an attempt to shake it or do some pole tricks or something! Don't just come out and swing with your hand around the pole and your top off and think that's enough. Give your customers something to like. 10. Constant Upsell Girl- C.U.G. Ah, how I hate thee. Constant Upsell Girl is the girl that never stops to enjoy the dance she's doing, and is only concerned about the next money she'll be making. If you tip her, she wants you to make it rain. If you make it rain, she wants you to pay for a mini-lap. If you do that, she wants $25 for a full lap, if she gets $25 for a full lap, she wants $100 for VIP, you pay $100 for VIP, she wants $400 for champagne room. IT NEVER ENDS. Asking is one thing, telling is entirely different. Concentrate on what you're doing right now, and then maybe we can talk about what happens next. Maybe if you give me an awesome dance right now, I'll want more, and you won't have to constantly upsell me. P.S. One other thing that gets an honorable mention is the girls that hang on you as soon as you walk into the club. Can I at least sit down first? JEEZ!

32 comments

  • Dain
    11 years ago
    1. DJs who can't articulate English syllables, i.e. most of them. 2. Dancers who think their ass is made out of gold. 3. Dancers who lie. 4. Dancers who are ugly and expect a tip. 5. Bouncers who keep track of dances and think they're the morals police. 6. Managers who make the "music" too loud, i.e. all of them. 7. Dancers who are constantly up-selling. 8. Customers who tip too much; this just raises expectations among the dancers and thus makes life more difficult for us others.
  • rickdugan
    11 years ago
    Mad for the whole night? Don't be so sensitive. Sometimes one must work through a lot of chaff to get to the wheat. My specific thoughts are as follows: 1. Pushy Waitresses- Toughen up a little and just let her know that you will need a while. Why get worked up over a girl who is just doing what she is told to do? 2. Dishonest Dancers- Then you must get mad almost every time you go to a club. If you do not want to be misled about what can happen in VIP, then you need to be strong enough to press the issue and negotiate the specifics before you go back. 3. Stuck-Up Dancers- It is a pointless exercise to get worked up over dancers who are just not motivated, for whatever reason(s), to take your money. It happens a lot, for a variety of reasons that we will never understand. You just need to wait for one who DOES want your cash or, if the entire club is bad, move to a different venue. 4. Overpriced cover- If a cover charge is itself a deterrent to entering a club, then you really need to re-think whether you should be there. And most of the high cover charge clubs in TX are all nude byob, which are a hell of a bargain vs. some place that is charging $10+ per drink 5. Guys that tie up a strippers time all night- You may not understand what is happening, but just because she is sitting there does not mean that she isn't getting paid. This could be in the form of tips for her time or as a lead-in into a VIP/CR/Skybox (Skybox being a TX thing), etc. If you want her time, become more valuable to her than he is. Otherwise, you will need to suck it up and wait for her or look for other options. 6. Stripper BFs- Now seeing a stripper's BF in the club won't ruin my whole night, but I agree that it sucks and I do not spend a nickel on any girl who has one ITC that I know about. 7. Rocks- Why do you care what other guys do? You should worry about yourself. Besides, rocks just make the remaining spending customers more appealing, so their participation is not always a bad thing. 8. Seeing girls get nothing- It is her job to sell her services. If she cannot do that then maybe she should find a different job. I'm not really sure why you are worrying about what dancers are making. 9. No effort Hot girl- This is another animal that you will just need to learn to live with. They have existed forever and are not going away anytime soon, though nowadays, with this economy, it is harder for hot girls to get away with that crap. But when it happens, it is a simple matter to find a girl who is more appreciative of your spending. 10. Constant Upsell Girl- Just say no and then forget about her. Simple.
  • JScrib325
    11 years ago
    @rickdugan Thanks for your thoughts! I actually wrote this about a month ago, but it was just reviewed and published today. I've kinda calmed down about the stuff that has nothing to me. But I guess a lot of my problems come from an inability to say no sometimes. I have too much sympathy for some. As far as some of the others, it still pisses me off, but I'll take the solutions.
  • Alucard
    11 years ago
    I take issue with #5. With my last ATF She and I would spend her entire shift together. I paid for multiple VIPs with her. It was her choice to NOT wander off to another customer, and if she needed to - she asked me if it was OK. You simply have to come another time to get the girl or try another one.
  • GoVikings
    11 years ago
    "As a black person, there's nothing that makes me more upset than the clubs here in TX where a lot of the girls only gravitate towards white boys (whether they have money or not). I don't care what color I am, all of my money is still green with dead Presidents on it, so what does it matter?" Jscrib, does this really happen to you a lot? ranukam, who is also black, says strippers love black guys. I'm black too, but I'm not really sure whether strippers have avoided me or not because of that.
  • carolynne
    11 years ago
    a lot of dancers **think** black guys can be on average more obnoxious, and worse at understanding "no means no" than white guys. whether that's really true or not, i leave up to you. others do like your bigger than average tool!
  • Clackport
    11 years ago
    I used to have a problem with guys that would tie up a stripper all night, but if she's getting paid well you can't blame her, she's just making the best money decision for her that night. Find another girl or come back another time to get the girl you wanted to get a lapdance from. The pushy waitresses do annoy me sometimes, they come around every 5 minutes and ask if you want a drink after I already told them that I don't need another drink. As far as strippers loving black guys, I live in an area where there's not too many black guys so that might help. Also I'm nice and I treat them with respect blah blah blah, that also might help. But yeah like I said before the majority of strippers are in a relationship with a black guy. Carolynne- you like the brothas??
  • jthershey
    11 years ago
    JScrib, thanks for the acticle. It was well articulated and I actually agree with most of it. I wanted to add a couple more: 1. Guys who will just stare at you while you are getting a lap dance. That's one of my pet peeves. I know I should just be happy with the hottie in my lap, but I don't need an audience that I didn't invite. 2. Over-aggressive bouncers. An even bigger pet peeve. Probably don't need too much detail on this one. I've had a bouncer pull at my shorts once to make sure my zipper was up... He even inturrepted my dance to do it! Then he stood behind us the whole two songs shouting at me to "watch my hands." I know they have to protect the girls, but they go way too far sometimes. 3. VIP entrance charges. Why am I paying an extra $20 or $30 just to use the VIP room? Then the club still takes $ from each dance from the dancer after I give her $25 per dance. On the black/white issue. My best friend is Black, and he has the same issue at times. But then again more often it goes the other way. He gets plenty of girls that approach him just because he is black! But hopefully the girls arent judging before they meet the guys - ie. Give everyone a chance. But if they are ignorant like that, there are still plenty of other chicks who are down. They deserve your $ more anyhow.
  • Club_Goer_Seattle
    11 years ago
    You may wish to refer to my four-part series of discussion items: "Annoying Strip Club Practices," posted between June 2 - 22, 2011. Some of the same gripes are covered: Part 1: “Wanna Buy the Lady a Drink?” [view link] Part 2: “Wanna Dance (When You’re Sitting at the Tip Rail/Front Row)?" [view link] Part 3: Not Giving Dancer Info. by Phone [view link] Part 4: Strip Clubs that Close Without Notice! [view link]
  • JScrib325
    11 years ago
    Thanks for the input everyone. If you look at my profile and my reviews, I live in Wichita Falls (moving at the end of the year, thank God). And its a small town masquerading as a big one. So small town in Texas, I suppose its somewhat to be expected. And I'm not saying all the girls, but its a couple. They just seem scared or intimidated.
  • motorhead
    11 years ago
    As Alucard & ranukam said, I disagree with you on #5 (but your other points are spot on) I'm one of those guys that tie up a girl all night. Call me a whale if you want. She is FREE to leave anytime she wants but she knows I'm gonna empty my wallet this week, and next week, and the week after... Strippers may be crazy buy they're not stupid.
  • mikeya02
    11 years ago
    Ranukam, I'm sorry but your "the majority of strippers have a relationship with a black guy" cracks me up. You're confusing pimp, fuck buddy, baby daddy with a real boyfriend. Small world you live in.
  • Clackport
    11 years ago
    Mikeya is the expert. He's the guy that believes a stripper when she says "you're the only one I do this for". You are arguably the most gullible guy on TUSCL. In your three years on TUSCL you've got a grand total of two reviews. I say what I say out of experience with dating quite a few strippers and knowing a whole bunch of strippers boyfriends. But yeah you're the expert :)
  • mikeya02
    11 years ago
    Ok ranukam, thats your experience. BTW, the blonde in my pics dated black guys. Said I was bigger than most. But then, I've heard than from almost every hottie. My experience.
  • kingcripple
    11 years ago
    1. only when the waitress is unattractive 2. only happened once to me 3. never been openly stuck up to me, but some you can just tell 4. definately one of my pet peeves 5. absolutley awful 6. only encountered one the entire time i have been going to clubs. nice guy 7. this affects you how? 8. could be their own fault. I see several girls just hanging out not even trying. 9. might have encountered a few of these. cannot remember really 10. again, never encountered this the only thing you listed that i take issue with is #7, the rocks. How the fuck does this affect you. let them do them. If the club wants to kick them out then its the manager's job. why piss and moan?
  • GoVikings
    11 years ago
    Honestly, of all the things you listed, the only one I share your feelings with is the first one. Waitresses asking "do you want another drink" happens A LOT at the Paper Moon. I understand their job is to get as much $ out of you as possible, but it gets annoying. Other clubs I've been to aren't like this when it comes to drinks, but the Paper Moon happens to be the one I go to the most because it's one of the best in my area (which has a very limited amount of clubs to pick from).
  • JScrib325
    11 years ago
    7 doesn't affect me at all really, but it is annoying to me. Just something that bothers me.
  • she_is_covfefe
    11 years ago
    About the black dudes who complain dancers don't like y'all: I couldn't care less about the race of my customers; money is money. If a dancer is stupid enough to discriminate based on race, it's her loss.
  • 3LeggedMan
    11 years ago
    Enough with the race card, already! I'm a white guy that goes to clubs with a mixed clientele, and usually a mixed rotation of dancers. My personal desire is to get dances from the non-white girls...guess it would take years of therapy to understand why, but I just find them more exciting. Anyhow, my point is that from what I've seen, dancers of all races most highly respect the color GREEN, whether it comes from a white guy's wallet, a brown guy's wallet, or a black guy's wallet. Be generous to the ladies and they'll show you a good time regardless of race.
  • redxxxRose
    11 years ago
    thank you for your input,i can see you're very sensitive guy JScrib325,its nice that you care,but it would also be nice for you to grow a bit of thick skin,its a funny world we live in,theres always something annoying or evil happening around…anyway,on your subject,the worst thing for me in a strip club is a stuck up guy assuming something extreme about the whole business of lap dancing,-whether too good or too bad!
  • umissedaspot
    11 years ago
    Dating black men is a lot more common among white strippers I've known than among non-strippers. However, even many of these strippers avoid dancing for black customers for the reasons Carolynne described. So, if you're looking to date a stripper, it might help to be a brother. But if you're looking to buy lap dances from her, ehh not so much.
  • umissedaspot
    11 years ago
    As for the OP's rant, I see his 10 complaints as simply the way things are in many clubs, not something to get worked up over. None of it is ever going to change, so why not find something good to enjoy instead of letting the dumb stuff ruin your night?
  • JScrib325
    11 years ago
    None of it ever ruins my night. Just stuff that upsets me. As long as there are naked boobies around, your night can't be too bad.
  • umissedaspot
    11 years ago
    You called them "things that will make me mad for the rest of the night". Sounds like a pretty bad time.
  • raider53
    11 years ago
    As a black man in Portland, OR, I have had no problem with the strippers here at any club I have gone to. Long time ago, a stripper gave me some advice: Act like you've seen a naked woman before and don't try to be a "player". She wound up being my girlfriend while I was stationed there (Vegas) but it still works today.
  • pacer317
    11 years ago
    If I may add one of my own pet-peeves... Bathroom attendants... I can take a piss, flush the toilet, turn on the water, and wash and dry my hands on my own. I don't need some old fart in there expecting a tip for turning on the sink for me and handing me a paper towel. I know the johns are kept cleaner this way, but I'm there to tip the dancers and the occasional VIP attendant, not some old dude in the john.
  • rentz2
    11 years ago
    You don't like dishonest dancers but you don't like the girls who are being honest by staying away from people they don't want to dance for. I think you need to rethink your whole complaint.
  • sonic_r6
    11 years ago
    Regarding ROCKS: I once saw a rock "recycle" a dollar bill that was on the stage. Now that was very low. That kinda pissed me off, lol.
  • willnicolas77
    11 years ago
    #8: I take $100-$150 at least. It's like gambling. I take the money I intend to lose. Once I started this, getting any stripper was easy. I'm older now and get stick shifted on a regular basis, probably because I'm honest and grateful (I'm OLD, fucking OLD, 50. There's no BS about me taking her home etc. She sees nothing but money, I see T/A.) So the MILFs are my preference. Last one let me do just about anything, younger milf, early 20's I hope I didn't get her fired, because I really did enjoy her company.
  • bvino
    11 years ago
    The only two things I don't like are the volume up too high and allowing smoking all over the club instead of in designated "Cigar wonder bars". Other than that what's not to like? I can always leave if I don't like the talent and I have told several bouncers to improve their customer service. Me and mymoney go where we are welcome.
  • skibum609
    11 years ago
    I never thought about this before but here are my ten: 1) the wanna dance girl; clue - great effort babe 2) the girl who is all over you 1 second after you walk in; clue- I am 56 I need more than 1 second to be interested 3) dancers who smoke, hint: breath mints don't make your hair smell better; 4) the tell me why you don't want a dance girl - clue - I cannot bench press 300 pounds or you; 5) Ebony fan/jungle fever comments - clue - I like pretty girls and being 56 assume I have seen black women before; 6) I need the money for_____ clue - why do you think I look like the salvation army; 7) I give the best dance ever - clue - I have a better chance of growing taller than getting a good dance from you; 8) The hot Milf - I am married to one - that's why I am here; 9)18 year old dancers - clue - I graduated High School when your Mom was 10)The wouldn't you like to play with these(breasts) fake big tits clue - ugh.
  • sofaking87
    11 years ago
    Jscrib, I recommend you dust off the resume and move north. We have free health care and our strippers love all colours.
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