discussion comment
16 years ago
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motorheadFat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life
I see the majority of dancers have kids. Most people don't bring up such horrific pasts such as abuse, etc., so no, I've never been sure about the upbringing. I do know that everyone (except the dancers, of course) love to think dancers are broken, torn up, and generally used up individuals. I've known quite a few who appreciate the business PURELY for what it is. For myself, I am blessed with an solid family (they don't know I dance), have a degree and work outside the business, wasn't sexually abused (as far as my memory allows!), have no children (though nothing wrong with kids), and never have used drugs or extended past the bounds of dancing (no prostitution).
I think dancers TEND to be more materialistic. Parents tend to teach their values to their kids, so it's no surprise that dancers TEND to show affection with things.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I used to think that anyone in her thirties and dancing was probably too old. That's what I had in my mind when I first started dancing.
There are dancers who are in their twenties who look worn and old yet those in their thirties who are SO hot. It depends on the lifestyle, genetics, and desire to look good as to whether a dancer should hang up her heels. I know a dancer who's in her mid-late thirties. She used to be a car salesperson. She's married, has a nine year-old, and now dances three days a week. I know she gets work done, but she's amazing-hot. She looks like a Victoria's Secret model, and her business provides her with MUCH more money than she made selling cars. Her husband has a good job, and her money goes toward improving their lifestyle. They have and do things that they probably couldn't (or would have to save for like most people) on his income alone.
discussion comment
16 years ago
The best club I've worked at (earning-potential and environment/experience) has a nice website. The management is very professional and with high expectations. You can tell they are there to run a business.
The clubs I've worked that don't have good websites have been the same ones that are lacking in good management. You know, the guys who think they are hot shot business tycoons just because they have a job as a strip club manager.
Just my experience.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I have a worse one, almost forgot. A girl actually went to the bathroom (talking feces on the stage) while squatting at the pole. I didn't see it, but was back dancing, and heard about it(once was enough, but people were shocked and disgusted, and can we stop talking about such stuff??)...eew. Yes, she was fired.
discussion comment
16 years ago
A dancer was on stage, holding onto the pole for leverage. I'd worked with this girl several times, enough to know by looking at her that she could fall over at any moment. I went up to the stage to act like tipping her, just to check on her. She looked at me, smiled in a spaced-out way, and sank to the floor-smiling the whole time and grasping the pole. She fell over to the side, as though going to sleep. Myself and another dancer quickly scooped her up and walked (!) her to the nearest bathroom (away from customers-dressing room too far).
Alone in the bathroom with her, this girl became enraged. She just went crazy, and almost fell this time on hard tile. My friend (the other dancer helping) ran to get help, and the girl puked all over the place during this time. By the time a bouncer made his way in (it felt like forever), she was sitting on the toilet-no care in the world-looking like nothing happened.
Although it's the right thing to do to help these people, it's so maddening. I don't find it amusing at all since it's always seeming to be other people who are harmed by these people.
Fortunately, this girl no longer dances (I think she was fired). I think about her sometimes, cause she was a nice person, but a drunk. It's sad.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I'd have to agree with Bobbyl. If that isn't the case, there's no point in trying to talk such a narrow-mind into thinking anything else.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Geez, sounds like there's a lot to consider, based on the different minds working here to help you. It also seems that you have an answer for all those opinions, and you have it all figured out, so go for it. Seems like just a "good-luck" was in order all along...good luck.
discussion comment
16 years ago
If dancers escort from the club, I think it's unfair to the other dancers. That said, I don't have a problem with escorts (those in the real business are usually required to have STD/HIV tests, are somewhat protected, and are given fair pay OF AN ESCORT. I know you aren't looking for judgement, and at core, none here, but my two cents before I answer by opinion to your question.
If this girl doesn't take it upon herself to research the going rates of higher-end escort agencies (if she's a stripper, likely fits into that type) for services like she's giving, I'd be ecstatic at paying $300 a day if I were you! $300 IS a lot of money, but it's all relative, and escorts get paid a lot for a reason! Have fun and be safe!
discussion comment
16 years ago
I also have noticed a disproportionate number of dancers who, if they are in college or have a degree, it's nursing.
The dancers who are nurses tend to be dancers who stick around, or have danced a little while. This is important, because there's a big difference in mentality between longer-term dancers and those just doing it for a few months. Dancing is challenging. To deal with the challenges, some take the path of drinking/using drugs to handle it. Those who don't quit, don't take the sad path I just said, and yet still dance often are of the style of person who would be attracted to and successful in nursing.
I'm amazed at the success of some dancers who have no apparent bit of humanity in their bodies, but that type being successful is the exception. A truly successful dancer (doing no extras, staying healthy, etc.) has to be excruciatingly generous and kind. I know that you guys might laugh at that! Honestly, in nursing, we're not exactly given the credit or respect we deserve (don't we all look to the physician?), we feel compelled to maintain the Florence Nightingale service mentality even in the midst of sometimes rude and obnoxious patients, and we generally will take all kinds of crap-all in the name of being a good nurse. It takes humility and dedication. It's the bigger purpose that draws us to nursing, the possiblity of making a difference. We (nurses)are a pretty needy bunch, and codependent. It makes us feel good when we make others feel good, and, if we don't, we easily take it personally. Dancers are often very sensitive like this- underneath it all.
There's a lot more to it than that, but in a nutshell, that's my take on it!
discussion comment
16 years ago
I think that's a great idea-removable ink!!! I'm a dancer, don't have a tattoo, and know a few dancers who don't have tattoos either. I agree, though, we are in the minority. I'm just personally not into tattoos, but know some wonderful people who feel deeply about their choice of a tattoo. That's special.
discussion comment
16 years ago
Thank you for the thoughtful replies. I did sort of regret writing as I did, but now I'm thankful for the insight. As for the lack of paragraphs, I was simply writing, not thinking enough about form. And to the guy who thinks I'm like the girls he's dated, well, that's the kind of response I expected. I expected you guys to think I'm "messed up", so no surprise, but do thank those who believe a "stripper" is capable of experiencing and knowing relatively healthy relationships as her norm.
I'm kind of busy right now, and would like to look over further your responses before writing more, but just wanted to thank those who took the time to give your opinion. Thanks.
discussion comment
16 years ago
With the mix of alcohol, the removal of clothing, movement from one seat to another, and then, of course, a lap dance, there's great potential for lost items. I've come to enjoy the immediate look of joy and relief that comes from customers who were just out of their minds a moment ago, thinking they lost something, just to see I've found it! I do look out for my customers, and especially people I know. And as for me, there are a couple of dancers I rely on, those I know I can trust to look out for me. I've had my share of losses at the club, as some dancers must be so damn desperate that they choose to lose all their dignity for a few bucks. Focus on the good, though, and thanks for sharing the positive.
discussion comment
16 years ago
I cringe at the idea of if I'd started dancing at 18. I didn't start dancing until 22, and wow, what a world of wisdom that can be had in 5 years. That aside, environment is SO important, and unfortunately, I notice that a lot of dancers come from a such a background that makes me wonder whether dancing has a damn thing to do with their poor lives. I mean, the dancers who walk in with it "together" are the ones who tend to walk out "together". I truly believe that the dancer you referred to would be doing all the toxic stuff given any opportunity to do it, whether a stripper or not.
discussion comment
17 years ago
If a dancer is dancing for the right reasons (not to pay for drugs, etc.) then she will develop a comfort with her sexuality and herself. Women who know they are sexy and who can pull it all off without feeling self-conscious and closed are hot in bed (and I'm not lesbian-just know from myself). I would vote that strippers are more likely to be good in bed than the non-stripper just because of that.
discussion comment
17 years ago
I was told the first week dancing that dancing is entertainment and sales. I am so grateful for that advice and I've never forgotten it. Sure, we are all pretty much the same with our emotions-it feels good to be liked and it feels bad to not be "liked". Unfortunately there isn't a lot of training for new dancers. Myself and my fellow dancers who are successful at this don't think of someone not wanting a dance from us as rejection. We either think 1) they are waiting for someone, 2) they don't have good taste so wouldn't appreciate a great lap dance anyway (!), or 3) they don't have any money! Really, though, I think dancers who know better realize that there are a million reasons for a guy not wanting a dance at the moment. And if I go back to my first week's lesson, it's necessary to still treat the guy like he's a great customer even if he's not going to be mine! And everyone is happy. Next!
discussion comment
17 years ago
I'm a dancer from OH and I've relocated to the Chicago-area. Another dancer from my club moved to Las Vegas. Customers who regularly attended the club in OH asked about the new "rules". The business was slowing down like I'd not seen before. And as for overlooking the law if it's not overturned, it's set up to where both the customer and the dancer will be fined and held responsible-the club owners aren't necessarily the focus in this one. I'm in the health-care field, so I can't risk damaging my career. The law is pretty scary in that way, and people who have lives (most customers and some dancers) that require a clean record to continue as they are should take a look at the penalties. I wish it were as easy as paying a speeding ticket! It's really sad because I enjoyed dancing at my club and really had a good experience. I like dancing and intend to continue doing it part-time in Chicago. My heart goes out to the MANY dancers who will be left vulnerable in an already struggling economy in Ohio if this law goes into effect.