How do you all deal with Annoying Strippers?

Dude they're just doing their jobs. Be secure enough in your own skin that you don't need to get so worked up. From the tonal quality of your post I'm guessing that you're pretty abrupt when sending a girl along. No need to get tagged as an angry asshole. I find that a smile and something like "Honey, I should let you know upfront that I'm not buying anything for a while" works in 98% of the cases. No girl wants to spin her wheels drilling a dry hole.

I agree that "I'm waiting on someone" sometimes backfires as the savvier girls will respond with "Who are you waiting for?" or "Can I get her for you?" because they know that, in many cases, it's BS. Better to be a bit more direct in letting her know that you won't be spending on her, but there are nice ways to get the point across.

As an aside, bring me the "begging sob story" strippers all day long and twice on Sunday, or at least the hot ones. Because of course I feel so moved by their plights that I feel compelled to offer them earning opportunities. 😉 I've lost track of how many times I've converted a pity hustle into an OTC adventure.

I deal with all versions of annoying / persistent strippers the same way: directly but politely. And it works without drama over 90% of the time.

You sound like a white knight. lol Their jobs is to make customers happy, not be annoying. No anger at all, I just like to get to the point now. As I said I used to be nice, but nice does not work in my experience. I've even had a few actually thank me for not wasting their time. If I'm paying money, it's going to my way and no way else. Going to the strip club for me is a time of peace and relaxation and fantasy. Being annoyed is something that I don't like.

Also I have not come across one "hot" sob story stripper in my life. They are usually either fat or unattractive and not making money like the rest of the girls, thus the sob stories.

I never understood the customers that treat them like a girl friend. You shouldn't disrespect strippers, but there is no loyalty in defending them. The pussy goes to the highest bidder nice guy.

@call me. I agree. I'm not yelling or anything like that. Just very direct. I received drama maybe like 5% of the time. It work really works.

I think debonair was just using examples to start a conversation.

"I've discovered that saying "I'm waiting on someone" does not work at all. lol"

If you're telling the truth it almost always works. On other threads I've said put a name out there if they ask or point if the girl's on the floor. A more clever stripper will ask if they can sit while I wait, but I only say yes if the dancer I'd like knows to still come over.

Lately I haven't gone to clubs with 0 girls I'd like to talk with, so that's basically all I use. If I'm in a new club where I don't know the lay of the land I'll let the first dancer who approaches sit down if I don't see someone I like better. The exception is if I find her instantly repulsive I'll go with "I just got here" or whatever I think will get her away without drama.

The majority of the time it's not an issue at all. As soon as the initial pleasantries are over, any number of honest responses work pretty well to get them to move on. "I'm not interested in any company" is my usual base response. I might switch it up a bit and say I'm not interested in any dances or in buying anything, but it's the same basic principle. I'm not interested. I'll preface it with a "Thanks for coming to check on me, but..." or "I appreciate you stopping by" and sometimes I'll follow up with "have a good night" or something. If that doesn't work, I get a little more direct and will say something like "I'd prefer to be alone" or "I'd like to chat with some of the other dancers" with maybe a "would you mind giving me some space" or something. It's really rare it takes more than that. I try to avoid any notion that it's temporary, things like "not yet" or "just got here" suggest I want her to come back. That's almost always not the case, so why say it and have to deal with her again?

The only time I do find it a minor challenge is when it's a girl I've spent money on before and would potentially enjoy seeing again. Getting her to move on that day without any hard feelings can be tricky. But those scenarios are gonna be case-by-case in nature and there's no real generic advice to be given.

Being nice about it is not a white knight thing, it's rational self interest. You gotta accept a certain amount of it just goes with the territory. Customers generally want strippers to approach them. It's not always possible for a stripper to know if a customer is interested before approaching. Many strip club patrons are not the most socially adept types, it may take even a talented stripper a bit to distinguish lack of interest from lack of social skills. Reducing the friction is good business for both sides. Being unnecessarily rude is just gonna make them jaded and mercenary, being vague and dishonest just makes it harder for them and exacerbates the problem.

How are the ions in Miami? They're not too bad around here.

Umm. I said I lived in Miami for ions. Lol

If everything else fails, I just clam up. Do I care if I piss them off?

if you look at discussions like this there is usually a most common answer because the experienced strip club goers here have learned what works. Being firm but nice works best. Being honest is important too. Everyone who goes to strip clubs a lot learns after a while saying you are waiting for someone else when you aren't isn't the best answer because then they sometimes ask who you are waiting for or what does she look like. I had a stripper do that with me last night, but I actually was waiting for someone. She immediately left when I gave the name of the girl and what she looked like.

I avoid eye contact at all cost if they are annoying. Eventually they will try gaslighting you or ask if you want a dance where you then let them no you are not. Try not looking at her reaction when you turn her down.

It’s “eons” not ions.

I don’t want to read too much into how you phrased your post but it sounds like you have no confidence and have trouble communicating. One example:

“I used to be nice but now I'm direct.”

These two things do not have to be mutually exclusive. Don’t be a Dick. Just be respectful and tell them why they shouldn’t sit down. It’s not hard and you don’t have to give it another thought.

I never seem to have a problem, "not right now", "maybe later', or "another time" isn't so difficult, a stripper doing her job is no reason to be rude to her.

Good topic deboinair. Although the sob stories can be annoying, they can also be an opportunity to get a good deal for yourself. Taking everything that is said with a grain of salt, the stripper who tells you their electricity is getting shut off, her baby daddy has custody and she needs money for the lawyer, rent is due, etc provides you the buyer with a chance to undercut her somewhat and get more for less. Don't do OTC that results in paying for a hotel room, taking her to Ruth's Chris steak house, buying her chocolate and scented candles and all that shit, and then paying her for services rendered on top of that. Since strippers are often poor managers of money, spend it as fast as it comes in, live month to month, they're in a perpetual state of financial catch up. If they start on the sob story path, don't shoo them right away. Hear them out and then put an offer out there that works to your advantage.

@Jimmy McNulty If I had no confidence I wouldn't be direct. I would cower and cave in and tip and get dances like you probably do.smdh

@mickey. Naw I come to chill out at a strip to chill out. Not hear any SOB stories. I'm there for fun but to be depressed lol

Like I said before I never encountered one that I've found attractive with the SOB stories. I'm really picky when it comes to strippers. I only like the exotic ones. I only get the ones that I know I couldn't get in a regular bar without paying way more than I would in a strip club.

After leaving South FL and visiting other cities it's crazy how different the etiquette is in other strip clubs. Also the rules. I'm convinced that only South FL and Michigan are places where extras and such are plentiful and wide open.

Whether or not you're into OTC is a whole other thing, but it's not buying dinner, etc., etc.

Usually, it's just getting the hotel room. And while that can be somewhat more expensive than ITC shenanigans, it's mostly about wanting to have sex with a particularly hot woman in a spacious bed and not a broom closet. It's also about not having a timer running.

In any case, I always try to be nice to the dancers even when I'm turning them away. This is especially helpful if you're a regular at a regulars club, because the dancers do talk about the regular customers and give recommendations or warnings to new dancers. It works for me.

I've had large woc dancers sit dowb and just refuse to leave. They've seemed to have an attitude and wanted to ruin my evening. I'm not attracted to large, fat woc dancers. I can't tell them that of course, and they feel entitled to a tip or free drink. And I won't pay them to leave. What works, as a last resort, is I start feeling them up, playing with her big titties. When they decide I'm getting free feels, they leave.

Somebody's getting grumpy. This is what I get for trying to say something nice about the OP.

"Also the rules. I'm convinced that only South FL and Michigan are places where extras and such are plentiful and wide open."

You can be convinced and still be wrong. The TUSCL boards work better when people just bring what they know and don't speak in absolutes. Part of the fun is finding out about other places, and there's guys who post here regularly from all over the country who'll offer some advice on their local clubs. TUSCL has probably saved me as much time and money as I've spent when traveling around to different clubs.

===> "Also I have not come across one "hot" sob story stripper in my life. They are usually either fat or unattractive and not making money like the rest of the girls, thus the sob stories."

And your "ions" in Miami make you amply qualified to speak to every strip club experience everyone else has in venues across the country? Interesting. At the risk of bursting your little bubble, most places are not like Miami. It's definitely easier for a girl to make money if you've got ample tourist traffic and are willing to fuck and suck in the back. It's not like that in many other places, hence you will find hotter girls running pity hustles. especially when times are slow.

As to the rest, you're confused son. I wasn't defending the dancers. I was calling you a hypersensitive pussy. Someone should go smack your father for raising such a sissy, assuming you even had one. The strippers didn't do anything that needs defending. They are walking around that club in the underwear, when they aren't taking it off on the stage, for the sole purpose of coaxing you to spend on them. Shy strippers are often hungry strippers. So you may need to develop a little thicker skin if you're going to club extensively, especially now that you're no longer in Miami.

Let me give you some advice that your father should have given you but obviously didn't: Be the rooster son. Do you see the rooster getting all messed up in the head when he's surrounded by clucking hens? Of course not. He knows his role and who's in charge. Hens cluck and strippers hustle, when they aren't also clucking amongst themselves. See what I mean? Once you can adopt that mindset, you'll develop a much thicker skin and learn to enjoy different club formats a lot more.

^ I decided to not weigh in on that one. But, yeah... Providence.

^ Intended for wallanon. Ninja'd by Rick.

It's too late CMI...the Council of Ricks has already sent their champion into the arena lol.

@Rick Dugan. Did I ruffle your faggot feathers? It's so crazy how your cowards talk so tough online. Lol

"Eventually they will try gaslighting you..."

This isn't something you don't hear everyday. How does a dancer try to gaslight you when she's just sitting there with you out on the floor? I can kinda get the miscounting of dances and guys who get sloppy ending up in rooms they didn't ask for but couldn't think clearly enough to say no. But a fugly you're not interested in just parking herself in front of you? How does that work?

Okay, here's a rare correction of a correction...

"This isn't something you hear everyday. How does a dancer try to gaslight you when she's just sitting there with you out on the floor?"

^ I'm curious too Wall. In fact, that expression should probably never, ever, be used by a grown ass man when describing his interactions with a young girl in her underwear. 😆

===> "@Rick Dugan. Did I ruffle your faggot feathers? It's so crazy how your cowards talk so tough online. Lol"

So I see that your hypersensitivity isn't limited to girls in their underwear. Interesting to know. 😉

wallanon said "But a fugly you're not interested in just parking herself in front of you? How does that work?"

This is something I see at the Cadillac Lounge in Providence every so often. The dancers there are generally more aggressive. Or, passive aggressive perhaps.

It's a dancer basically trying to force a customer to pay her to go away (or at least get a free drink). It works on guys who are intimidated or awkward around dancers, and there's a few of those in every club.

This is where I'll become less nice and more direct (but not angry or argumentative). Basically, I let the dancer know that she's not going to win this battle of wills, and she's never getting money from me. That pretty much always works for me.

^ I'll add that I've actually had this happen only a handful of times. So it's not really something I worry about.

This is a very interesting topic because it correlates somewhat to the double standard. If a man is rejected. No big deal. Suck it up. If you reject a woman regardless of profession, it's rude. "Oh she is just a woman, a delicate flower"(insert eye roll). Men perpetuate this double standard by encouraging it. These are the same goofies that get their pockets emptied with nothing in return or very little. Strippers are hustlers. If you treat them like girlfriends they love it. They see a sucker.

I've had like one problem saying my same speech for years. I don't even give them a chance to sit down. After they say Hi. I say Hi. I'm not interested in any dances or company. I'll be damn if I spend money on a stripper I don't want. lol

Damn deboinar you are way too defensive and sensitive. Did it ever occur to you that some of the guys here don't get worked up about sillier stripper behavior because they're completely secure in their control of themselves and their wallets? See above about being the rooster.

I actually smile when a girl uses an over-the-top hustle. It doesn't get her paid, but it does give me a brief moment of amusement. Then I send her away with that smile still on my face. Simple. 😊

A little stoicism goes a long way in a strip club. Women are supposed to be more emotional and sensitive than men. If you are internalizing what young girls in their underwear are saying to you, you're doing this wrong. Be the rooster son. Eventually you'll learn that it will attract the types of girls who you DO want to sit with you.

It seems like it's been ions since Dugan had genuine keyboard throwdown in the forums. Who will win?

wallanon said "It seems like it's been ions since Dugan had..."

lol

Nah, this is just a little dustup. Idk why, but something about older grown ass men whining about young women who take their clothes off for a living just sets me off for some reason. Maybe it's deeper frustration about the sad state of affairs with the emasculated generation of younger men, idk.

@deboinair

I will play along and comment on your discussion.

“Did you know? In Anglo-French, someone who was genteel and well-brought-up was described as deboneire—literally "of good family or nature" (from the three-word phrase de bon aire).

When the word was borrowed into English in the 13th century, it basically meant "courteous," a narrow sense now pretty much obsolete.

Today's debonair incorporates charm, polish, and worldliness, often combined with a carefree attitude (think James Bond).”

To answer your question:

Q: How do you all deal with Annoying Strippers?

A: Remember, YOU choose how to react to people, so you shouldn’t react by feeling “annoyed”, by choosing to remain calm and don’t let anyone “hurt your feelings” you should always be able to react calmly.

If you want to stop feeling annoyed, start by looking inside yourself. What is going on in your head that makes it hard for you to not let things annoy you.

Irritability is a common emotion to a lot of people, and it might be due to life stresses, lack of sleep, and hormonal changes.

Being easily “annoyed” may be a sign of a mental health condition, like anxiety or depression.

Even “annoying strippers” usually have redeeming qualities.

I don’t get annoyed by any stripper that is not my type, I just behave like a normal human being, a mature gentleman and let her know that I am looking for my “type”.

If she asks me what is my “type”, I say; Do you know who Marilyn Monroe was?

They all know who Marilyn Monroe was; and sometimes they would tell me if there is a girl in the place that fits the description.

The idea is to have a good time and don’t let anyone or anything get on the way.

Just fart while she’s sitting on your lap and that’ll do the trick.

I usually just go with something like "I don't want to waste your time, but I won't be buying anything from you tonight. I'm in the mood for more of a "insert description of what I'm looking for (spinner, girl next door, MILF or whatever I feel like at the time) type of girl tonight. You'd be better off making money from the other customers right now." Once they know they aren't getting any money from me they tend to leave. If I'm lucky they sometimes provide a recommendation that works out well for me and in those cases I tip them a little for the recommendation.

Maybe I have grown a resistance to tipping from all the homeless people that lived around my neighborhood. After a while, you kinda zone out and don't even look at them as they reach their hand out in desperation. Sure I have nothing against giving a dollar or spare change to those less fortunate hobos. But at the end of the day, you know that they will just use it to buy alcohol or drugs.

Same thing with strippers. You are not gonna save them by giving them a tip or buying them a drink. They will keep coming back to the club, because they need more money. So I feel no shame in not giving them anything. I will always be respectful and give a simple reply like "No thanks" or "I'd like to enjoy the show on stage for now" but if they persist.... I will just zone out. Drink my beer. Look away. Look at my phone. And they always go away.

It's interesting how many girls simply don't get the hint when we avoid eye contact and blankly stare when not interested. Eventually, they all go away at some point, but some take longer than others. I usually inform her that I'm just watching stage show / enjoying beer / etc. If she chooses to stay, that's on her....it's confusing to me why she would want to keep pursuing a guy that shows disinterest from the start.

While I understand that it takes hustle to make bank, if a guy is stand-offish from the start, it seems like a futile effort if there is such strong disinterest being shown.

^It's not confusing to them.

The reason why they still hang around because:

1. Women loathe rejection. It's a huge ego blow.
2. They are banking that you are going to give them something so they go away. A lot of goofy customers do this, so they try it on all customers.

Wow, Dugan gave a big free of charge schooling as usual!

And CMI i wish I could have seen you getting rattled around by those dancers in the battle of wits.

Somewhere along the line, I have learned that nicer way of telling them also works for the timid ones: "You are gorgeous, but for today I am in the mood for exploring something: a different race / slimness characteristics / ... whatever"... They might say: "Let me help you, and ask further explorative question" - I'd be direct in saying: "I'm exploring, and like to get to the girls myself. Thank you though". Don't say anything more.

Say no immediately and directly. “ No, thanks”.

Are you waiting for someone ? No, thanks

Can I join you ? No, thanks.

Want to have some fun ? No, thanks

Etc

There are certain lines intended to get you to say yes

Do you like black/Hispanic/tall…girls ?

Are you waiting for someone ?

Do you like to have fun ?

Or, most annoying, an unattractive dancer quickly sits in your lap.

@mark94: "Or, most annoying, an unattractive dancer quickly sits in your lap."

Stand up and dump her on the floor.

I Would Just Say "I'm Not Ready But If I Can, I'll Let You Know". If You Are Drinking/Eatin' Or Just Lookin' @ The Stage/Checkin' Things Out, Let Her Know That. These Are Straight, Clear & Honest Ways To Keep Her Away. You Can Say "I'm Not Sure What Girl I'm Lookin' For Yet Or I'm Still Checkin' Everything Out" ✔️