Second chance for a dancer

I wouldn’t without reason to think things would be different …. Also really depends on what the first dance was like and why it wasn’t up to snuff

Depends on the nature of the "bad experience."

Saying she did more dances than she did = ROB = I wouldn't give her the time of day.

I usually get 2 dances with a new dancer to see her moves and energy. If I'm not a fan of either, I'm unlikely to go back.

It’s up to you to manage the count. You can do this by checking in at the end of each song or some other method, the main thing is she will get the idea this is important to you and you’re not going to be fooled.

Almost every stripper will take advantage of you if you let it happen, but when you show her that you are experienced and on top of your game, she will know not to try it with you.

That said, if you’ve had a bad experience why go back to the same dancer? There’s plenty more and she’ll presume you are an easy target, which will be a hassle to reset.

Best to move on.

What are your options ? If I'm in a club that has 50 other hotties to choose from, then I"m not going to give her the time of day again. If she's the only thing that is touchable in the club, then it depends on how Horny I am.

I don't patronize ROB's. If I absolutely know a girl is over counting, I won't pay more than what I owe. I absolutely will not tip her or buy dances from her again as long as I remember her. Period. I've had girls make a stink, threaten to go get managers, etc. Never once has a manager come up to me and said a thing when I've stood my ground.

I have been uncertain of the count before, in those situations I typically will just pay if it's reasonable. And if she's hot enough and the dance was decent, I'd probably give her a second chance but pay attention and leave zero room for uncertainty.

It really comes down to how confident you are in what happened and her intentions. If there's a decent chance she made an honest mistake, or you did, consider giving her a second chance. In the grand scheme of things the cost of a couple dances is no big deal. But if you're confident she's intentionally overcharging via deceptive practices, then move on. Don't support that behavior and don't subject yourself to it.

Not in this case, I wouldn't give her another chance. Of course, if I had asked for two, and she went 3, that's her problem, not yours. And if I was sure that she was over counting, there's no way I'd have given her more.

If you go back to her in this case, chances are she'll do the same, thinking she can get away with it.

I’ll take the other side. You said she was hot, had a good personality and gave a great dance. You now know to be on the watch for over counting. Do a dance, let her know you and she had a miscount last time and ask her to keep track of the songs and you do the same. If she tries to rip you off you’ll know for the price of an extra song or two. If she doesn’t, you might’ve found a good dancer. I’ve gotten far more extra room time or uncounted dances than the opposite. When you get ROB’ed it sucks, but it all evens out.

The definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. 😉

Drewcarey I completely disagree that it is up to the customer to keep count. The dancer should be asking at the end of each dance if the customer wants another. This has been my experience with 99% of dancers. Compare it to getting a drink at the bar. The bartender asks you if you want another drink before bringing you a new one.

I will often announce how many dances I plan on. “ Let’s start with three”. Helps reduce confusion.

dogchain, you are right in theory. But reality is a bit different. The dancer is going to try and get every dime out of a customer that she can. They would charge 1000 bucks for a hug if they thought they could get away with it.

So the wise customer always remembers the principle of caveat emptor.

No. For what? I pick dancers I won't have a bad time with

Bgsd31 I see your point of course but when factoring most dancers would be smart enought to realize their money is going to come from repeat business not one offs you would think they would want to be fair so you come back. I think most dancers do get that and don't try to get one over on you for that very reason.

My question is more asking if you think this person is a rob or this was a true misunderstanding that can be fixed.

We have no idea if she miscounted or ripped you off. In fact, neither do you.

If you want to give it another shot, then before you go in ask her to let you know when one song ends and the next begins. If she won't do that, then go find another dancer.

Around here, most dancers will continue dancing for multiple songs without asking the customer. My travel experience isn't as great as others, but the vast majority of places I've got dances in that has been the case too. Most of the time they'll stop at some point and ask to continue, but that's usually at least 4-5 songs in if not more.

@dogchain: "Drewcarey I completely disagree that it is up to the customer to keep count. The dancer should be asking at the end of each dance if the customer wants another. This has been my experience with 99% of dancers. Compare it to getting a drink at the bar. The bartender asks you if you want another drink before bringing you a new one."

You're absolutely right, the dancer SHOULD be keeping track. But we all know that some dancers do what they can get away with, for example the dancer in question here. You have to decide if she's running the show or you are, and there are obvious tradeoffs with each choice. As you have seen firsthand.

So count songs or pay up front. Accusing her of over counting after the fact is your problem

Letting the dancer be in charge of what you're spending is beyond weak. Tell her at the beginning to let you know/ask before starting song 2 and every song thereafter. I do this in clubs because most of the music just sounds like one awful song and its very hard to determine when one ends and another begins. Confirm every 2 -3 songs.

@dogchain

I will play along and comment on your discussion.

If you already told her and I quote:

“but said I wouldn't get dances from her again.”

Then be a man of your word and don’t go to her and ask her for dances anymore.

But if she comes to you and ask you if you want a dance tell her smiling; “only if we have an independent counting system, I think there is an app for that”

If she gets the joke and says something about how you and her can keep good track of the dances, then laugh it out and give her a second chance.

I personally have a two strikes and you are out policy that I do apply with no exceptions, regardless of how hot she is.

The cost of one dance isn’t very expensive tuition. You could be this guy: tuscl.net

HOLY SHIT. Icee, Ski. and I are all on the same page. Harbinger of the apocalypse.

CJ good point. Unless it is Obvious she is being deceptive, a lot of times they maybe should get a second chance. I’ve had a couple dancers in the past I’ve given a second chance, sometimes because they were hot and other times because like warrior said, “I was really horny” and they was nothing else available. I’ve also ended up disappointed with the same dancer for the sketchy ROB type stuff. It’s ultimately up to you what is greater the risk or the reward.

"Drewcarey I completely disagree that it is up to the customer to keep count."

You're also wrong. If you don't know how many dances she did, you did the right thing by paying her for 3. Sometimes I'm in a club that's usually ok but the DJ on shift will go crazy and keep cutting songs off at 2 minutes. I'll let it go once, but if the next song is short I'll call it and tell the dancer why. If I know I got distracted and have to ask for the count, unless it sounds way higher I'll go with her number.

To your original "Do you think I was to harsh?"

Unless you yelled at her, it sounds like you just agreed to disagree. If you two just met she got her money and it's probably not a big deal. But you said her dances were "great", so maybe it's worth another go where you're on top of the song count.

"Should I try again and make it very clear she has to ask for another dance or was I right?"

Try talking about it like it's not a big deal and see if she'll go for it. But if you make it seem like you're high maintenance it could affect the quality of your dances.

I won't do lap dances with a girl again if I think she miscounts the lap dances on purpose. I also won't do them again with a girl if she refuses to do something that is generally allowed in local clubs like breast touching, has bad hygiene, is rude or condescending, wants to start in the middle of a song instead of waiting until the beginning of a song, or spends most of the lap dance trying to upsell to a private room. When they do this, they think it is unimportant to give me a good experience. If they think I'm too unimportant to treat well, then I think they are too unimportant to go visit and spend money on.

“… I completely disagree that it is up to the customer to keep count. The dancer should be asking at the end of each dance if the customer wants another. This has been my experience with 99% of dancers …”

I think that is wishful-thinking on your-part – my experience w/ 100s of clubs in different cities has been the opposite in that 99%-of-the-time the dancer won’t tell you when she’s starting a new-song – dancers will try and get as many songs from a custy as possible and letting the songs go one-after-the-other is the best way to get the most-money from custies – your analogy of being at a bar, or that dancers shouldn’t rip-off custies b/c they lose repeat-business, is again wishful-thinking and you’re projecting how things-should-be vs the reality of the vast-majority-of-clubs – getting ripped-off in strip-clubs is as common as g-strings in strip-clubs – no-one in a strip-club will look out for you or your best-interest; it’s up to the custy to know what the fuck he is doing analogous to when one goes to buy a car (are you gonna expect for the salesperson, or dealer, to look out for you and “do the right thing?”) – at the end of the day strippers are salespeople that don’t make money unless they sell-dances and they will try and sell as many as they can including cheating custies; o/w they run the risk of going-home w/ little-money or even in-the-red.

dogchain said "I completely disagree that it is up to the customer to keep count."

If that has worked for you, great. But, there are enough stories on here about dancers miscounting (intentionally or not) that it's not remotely realistic to think that it will apply in every club and every situation. I'm responsible for my money. In a strip club, where there's generally more chaos and fewer ethics, that applies double. If a dancer turns out to be good about keeping count (and most are), then I appreciate that but I remain vigilant.

Whether to repeat w/ the dancer in question – unless you plan to change the way you club; then no b/c good-chance you’ll have the same issue; and not only w/ her; but if she indeed over-counts; foolish-of-you to think she is the only-one that does so – also; you already accused her of over-counting you w/o u being sure; so u may have “poisoned the waters w/ her” (but at the end of the day a dancer will rarely turn-down-money/selling-dances).

As a custy, it’s very-easy to get distracted as lose-count-of-the-songs (and many over-counting-dancers count on this; as well as most-custies being inexperienced and “ripe-for-the-picking”) – also as has been posted; in many clubs the DJs either:

a) mix the songs together to where it can be hard to detect song breaks and the custy thinks he’s still on the first song

b) cut songs short (when a custy is not getting dances; then he often doesn’t notice the songs lengths)

c) some clubs play songs of varying lengths (seemingly on purpose) – and songs can be anywhere from 2 to 3.5 minutes long

I’ve been over-counted in the past; and as others have posted, since I wasn’t 100%-sure: I went ahead and paid (unless it was egregious; e.g. I thought we did 2 and she tells me we did 6; some dancers don’t give a fuck and will actually do shit like this; count on it).

After a couple of over-counting experiences; I was not gonna let it happen again; thus I:

1. tell the dancer upfront b/f we start to let me know everytime she starts a new-song – this usually eliminates almost-all-over-counters – but like I said; there are dancers that plain-and-simple don’t give a fuck and even when I ask them to let me know everytime they start a new song; they either stop doing it after the 2nd-song claiming “they forgot”; or they still over-count (e.g. they do song no. 3 and the next-one they’ll tell me it’s song no. 5 or even no. 6; it’s happened)

2. since no. 1 above isn’t foolproof – I will usually also use my cellphone stopwatch to keep track – i.e. if songs in the club are on avg 3-minutes for example; when I start my dances I’ll kickoff my cellphone-stopwatch and if I did dances for let’s say 10-minutes or so then I’m sure I did 3-songs

After I started doing the above I never paid an over-counter again – it def sucks to have to do what I do vs just sitting back and enjoying my dances; but due to my-style-of-SCing I tend to run into more over-counting issues and for me I rather take some upfront precautions vs paying for songs/dances she didn’t give me.

It seems you don't know for certain whether she did 2 or 3. That being the case, perhaps give her another chance, but be alert for another potential overcount. If she overcounts again, allocate your funds to another girl. In the words of George W. Bush, "fool me once, shame on you....fool me twice...ummm...ummm..you can't get fooled again".

I easily lose count of songs because I get distracted by the girl. I have tried to time them. then I forget to look at the clock when we're done.

as to giving the girl another try, I had a new girl in a lap dance situation that was really unsatisfactory and then about a half a year later I had the most excellent time with her!

I will clear up the count. This is a club that goes by number of minutes not songs. There is a digital clock in each booth. I took note of the time at the beginning and end of our time. It was about a minute under the two dance mark when she asked if I wanted another then I said I was good and then she said she did 3.

I wouldn’t be that thirsty.

It looks like your an Jersey guy right? I mean dude your literally between NYC and Philly there’s too many options man to keep going back to a ROB. Just getting in the car and branch out a little bit.

If it was somebody who has like that one club option only for a few hours idk that’s a rough spot

Is there any reason why you would be inclined to give this dancer a second chance?

I understand that when giving dances a dancer should always let you know when the next dance is starting - and the dancer should keep an accurate count. However, it’s imperative (in order to avoid ROBs and dance count errors) that the customer is well aware of the dance count too. Those discrepancies can kill the experience of a great dance.

If the dancer asked me if I wanted dances on a return club visit, I would say no thank you. I wouldn’t be rude, but I wouldn’t lead her on (to think I might buy dances).

My view is different, as a one dance discrepancy in count won’t bother me. If my pants are around my ankles and she’s working me hard, I’m not going to stop and dispute it.

Eh the scene by me isn't as great as you think. A lot of clubs but most are filled with low quality. I feel like the quality has been declining more and more since the post covid refresh. Been trying to branch out as of late with little success.