A girl asking who else I played around with
rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
I told her that I don't talk about what I do with anyone else. When she pressed me, I said the same thing again and added "and you of all people should be grateful for that."
When she pressed, she made the point that most of those girls are no longer dancing anyway, but to me that doesn't matter. It's just not in my DNA to betray a confidence. Also a lot of these girls are still living in the community and have new lives to protect, including families and vanilla jobs. I won't be a source of gossip fodder about anyone, most especially about a girl who spent time in the sack with me.
WTF was this girl thinking? And to be clear, she was not testing me, she was legitimately curious. Did she not understand that a guy who will run his mouth about other girls would do the same about her with someone else? She should have known better.
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Same here actually. I think 25 is right - she was digging for dirt and hoping that I'd name someone who she could use it against.
“A true gentleman does not kiss and tells.”
A true gentleman never tells about conquests, private matters, or dealings.
His business is nobody else's.
The undeniable reality is the fact that you and you alone are the best and only person to keep your own secrets really secret.
“Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.”…
:D
I had one dancer tell me that she asks to get a sense of what kind of experience a customer will want from her as an untried dancer (most likely in terms of extras but perhaps beyond that). She said that she has a pretty good idea of how other dancers operate, so that's her guide post.
When I told her to "Just ask the question.", she said that many customers don't want to say what they want out loud for reasons ranging from shame, fear of LE, and wanting to keep the fantasy intact.
For the vast majority of customers who don't spend a lot of time on a titty bar message board, I can see that reluctance to be blunt being a real thing. So, I'm somewhat sympathetic to the dancer.
That said, I also never talk about what happens between me and another dancer. I certainly don't talk pricing (which I've also been asked about).
That's why when a dancer asks I say, "I don't talk about other dancers (and you're welcome)."
This is such an incredibly bad take. I try not to criticize, but it's important that nobody ever sees this and thinks it's ok. Lol, it's not ok to tell someone who wants as much of your money as possible (even if she likes you) anything they can potentially use against someone else.
Unless you're an uber-asshole your P4P girls probably won't turn on you directly because they've got something to lose, but don't think for a moment they wouldn't poison every other well if they believe they'll get away with it.
I get the shame, and maybe the fantasy, but the fear of LE doesn't make any traction with me. To me, the probability that a cop is going to undress for strangers in order to trap a john seems low, as in approaching zero, when it's much easier to simply rent a hotel room and do the sting there. In fact, while I've heard of plenty of undercovers propositioning dancers to get the club in trouble, especially since they can soak the club for way more vig than an individual, I've never once heard of a cop working as a stripper for the purpose of arresting customers. Note that last clause before you reply saying you've know copy strippers.
@ChampPhilly: "Rick, I do not think she is going to misuse that other OTC dancer info. May be trying find your class, did you date cheap ones or high value premium class ones.?"
You're as clueless as BigThirdEye. I wonder why that would be...?
@rick, my favorite response to that kind of question is "how would you feel if I told someone you don't know how I pay you to swallow my nut?"
So, for a lot of guys who don't know any better the fear of LE is valid.
Clueless AND no integrity. What a combo...
That's a fair point. I've opined before that I think, based on what I've observed, that regular TUSCL posters are not even close to representative of the majority of club-goers, with regard to extras seeking anyway, so for those people, I suppose I can see that. It does, however, surprise me that a few moment's thought on the subject wouldn't show how unlikely it is.
It doesn't surprise me. I mean, look at some of the in-club decisions made by guys here who should know better.
And that has included me on a few rare occasions.
So ChumpPhilly, it's your belief that the classy thing to do here would have been to run my mouth about the private activities of other dancers? Interesting. 😏
But ok, if you don't think that she was going to misuse the information, then please share a positive and supportive reason for her asking for that intel. I'd be fascinated to hear your alternative theories. 😆
But I’ve had customers tell me about other dancers in hopes to try to get me to step my game up n be jealous
Nope I’m still a bitch n they are still seeing me.
The only thing that happened is now I think their a gullible idiot
The vast majority of dancers and customers have to reach some kind of comfort zone without providing "references". It's not hard to do. Chat a bit and engage in banter. Buy a couple of drinks. Maybe do a few test lapdances. Learn to talk about what you want without being creepy.
Honestly, a hefty selection of guys in most clubs have middling hygiene and the social graces of a road accident, and even they manage to land the plane on the runway most of the time.
So, be a little better than that guy and don't drop dimes on other dancers. It's not a heavy lift.
Don't take this the wrong way, but if a guy can legit make a girl cum eventually shit gets weird if he does it enough. Paid or not.
Also the risk isn’t about a cop dressing up as a stripper undercover, there is quite literally the fact that if you tell a stripper about otc activities with another stripper or an escort, she can both use that against you, or against that dancer. If there was some issue with her, she could try to get you in legal trouble via reporting you for solicitation or prostitution. She could possibly try to get other dancers in trouble.
Most girls get it, and after a moment of reflection they appreciate it. But there has been far too many who don't seem to. I don't know if they feel like we have a special relationship, or that somehow I owe it to them, or if it is jealousy or an axe to grind, or STD fears, or what. I just know I'm not participating.
Girls who don't seem to get that I ain't gonna talk about it, or more importantly why I won't, are ones I rarely continue to see. I'll look past a single instance of pressing the issue, but if it keeps coming up, I'm done with her. I'm fully aware few dancers are as discreet as I am in this regard, especially in clubs where ITC is common and OTC girls aren't whore-shamed. But I still don't see any reason to tell one what I did with the other. They should be able to surmise how much I get around or with whom I associate by observing ITC, there's no need for details.
No shit, Sherlock.
As has been posted in the past, dancers in clubs sometimes form cliques; or there is drama among some of them – so this can be part of it – also, some girls may be worried if a regular-of-hers is getting w/ a dancer(s) that may have an extra-bad-rep in the club in terms of her sexual-activities and perhaps the dancer asking may be concerned for herself.
Everyone subconsciously knows, or learns, that strip-clubs are to be treated as a “hear-no-evil see-no-evil” environments; but some dancers get extra-comfortable w/ regulars to where they feel they can do/say things they normally wouldn’t with a random-custy – also, at the end-of-the-day, one is dealing w/ women whom often don’t think/feel like the avg guy (not to mention they are in a different perhaps at times vulnerable situation being the service-provider).
Some here might be over-thinking this. I know for sure that some girls want reassurance what they are going to do is okay. That doesn't mean I name names. I do tell stories, however. It helps to establish my own credentials.
Also, never forget that girls talk. They might know more about you than you realize. Several times I have had club girls recommend me to willing girlfriends. I remember one such creamy redhead in particular. Yum.
At an extras-friendly club, I once had a dancer ask me if I had ever had a "session" with a particular dancer who was working that night. I told her that I did not answer questions like that but I asked her why she wanted to know. She told me that this particular dancer had taken some time off to treat an STI and she wanted to avoid any customers who might have been infected by the other dancer. This was. in the context of negotiating whether a BJ would be BBBJ or CBJ.
I still didn't answer her question but her rationale for asking the question made more sense to me.
Good point 25-ape.
Like you and the dugan I never kiss and tell. Unless, of course, kissing and telling leads to wackiness that might amuse me. Club drama seldom leads to amusing wackiness…until it does. And that’s when this rick bends his rick rules. ROAR!!!
I've had that happen sometimes. Usually they take money are are pleasantly surprised when I'm good with whatever entertainment they offer. But then there are some chicks who don't make their boundaries clear and think I'm disappointed if they don't put out everything. We know most dancers don't put out everything. That's why we find a girl or two at clubs we like who do it all, so we can just throw money away on the rest of you in case you change your mind. But kidding aside, it works better for everyone to just be clear. But not BEFORE the first dance starts because then you're just an annoying buzzkill dancer who doesn't want to make money lol.
Less commonly, there's a level of insecurity and self-worth that takes a hit and causes something similar to jealousy too. I've certainly seen it in girls before. Granted, I'm not in their heads and it could be an act, but I've absolutely seen signs in dancers of actual jealousy. The idea that someone might prefer the company of someone else over her causes jealousy. It doesn't mean she loves me or anything, I might be out of sight/out of mind the second I leave. But she'd prefer that she be the object of my attention (and my spending, obviously) while I'm there. Maybe it's an external locus of identity, maybe it's daddy or abandonment issues from childhood actually causing it, not any actual attraction to me. But that doesn't make the effect any less real.
Too funny blah. Though tbh I kind of expect this type of comment from silly baby strippers, not from a girl who has rubbed on so many dicks over the years that she's reached psycho burnout status. 😉
This industry would be a shadow of itself if it were not for wandering spouses and the girls who eagerly facilitate their misdeeds. Heck plenty of the girls are also lying about exactly what they do to earn their money. There are no innocents in a strip club.
About a year ago I witnessed a baby stripper walk up to a seasoned vet, who apparently she knew from outside the club, and complain about dealing with a married guy. The more experienced dancer gave her a slightly amused, yet matter-of-fact, look and said "They're all married hon." While not strictly true of course, it got the point across, lol.
The jaded vets are the same on both sides, we ain't gonna waste time on that nonsense. It's what we're seeing to avoid.
I think the discussions about her motivations are unlikely to provide a reasonable conclusion, as there is a component of stripper logic involved.
Based on my experience - it’s another time when a girl is setting a trap - and the best answer is to not give any information.
I was speaking in generalities, because none of us know what was going through the mind of the OP's dish. But I think if there's guys out there who really believe strippers can't get the feels out of P4P and do bad things because of it, that's a luxury I don't have.
For me the most notorious incident I've had happened in two different clubs on two different days. Same crazy stripper. You're probably saying "wait, isn't that two?". Let's just say if I'd known why the first thing happened I wouldn't have shown up to trigger the second.