Tell us something about yourself...........

My maternal grand parents were born in Bessarabia.

^ Very cool. Never knew where it was until I googled it just now.

I've been on TV

I run a strip club site

"I've been on TV"

But his mom knocked him off because she wanted to clean the dust off top of it.

I suffer from premature evacuation

"I run a strip club site"

What's it called? Do you have a link to it?

I’ve been featured in a local newspaper once. No, I will not say why.

I barely avoided a famous workplace hostage situation and murder.

I always vote for one democrat party candidate in some minor local election, because I find it distasteful to vote straight party ticket.

I own more than a few guns.

Ah, Nice, what was it? We won't judge.

I actually don't do drugs

I'm not sure I have anything that people WON'T believe...I was raised mormon. Now I'm a non-monogamous superfreak haha

I once ran a mile in less than 4 minutes and 30 seconds.

I’m at least a foot taller than you skibum

I sometimes wear underwear in a strip club.

When I was about 12 - I got into a fist fight with a taller, goofier, big toothed kid (who was a few years older).

Evidently Kelly Tripucka didn’t appreciate me calling him a horse toothed goofball. He wasn’t uncoordinated for much longer, as he played basketball for Notre Dame and the NBA. I still keep in touch with his one of his less successful brothers.

I knew John Belushi.

I almost physically collided with Natalie Portman. And she's tiny in real life, if I didn't have better reflexes I would have concussed her.

@jackslash... Now you KNOW you have to share more about that!

I started a prison riot

I shot a guy once. (He didn’t die)

I once made out with Nicole Ritchie. And the fat old bitch from shahs of sunset sexually harassed me.

I used to be the drummer for a few rock bands in high school and college.

drewcareypnw shot me once.

I briefly held Shakira's hand at a concert

Christie Brinkley said hi to me when I was a pool boy.

I spilled drinks on a Playboy playmate at a club.

In college, when an All-American / future lottery pick / future (two-time) Olympian, with six inches and 60+ pounds tried to dunk on me, I met him above the rim and blocked it (and then he got mad and dunked on me 10 straight times...but I got him once!)

Once in Vegas, coming out of a bathroom, I turned the corner and crashed into coach Tarkanian and he hit the ground. I felt terrible.

Another time in Vegas, leaning up against a wall, Mike Tyson came around the corner and crashed into me. Next thing I know, all I can hear is "I'm sowwy, I'm sowwy". After I shook the cobwebs, I looked down and saw it was Iron Mike.

Maynard from Took got me drunk.

And Carrabba's works better than Olive Garden...

Tool*

Oh, also...

I've been on TV several times, including Sportscenter and Road Rules on MTV

And when I was 21, partying on Sunset Blvd, a (female) pornstar sexually assaulted me. #metoo

I once led a hockey league in penalty minutes. I guess with my screen name that's really not that much of a surprise though...

I am a working musician, but not famous by any stretch of the imagination. Not even close. However, about four years ago I sat in with a band as a featured instrumentalist at a live show at a small venue in one of the Atlanta suburbs, and the video of that performance has now been seen more than 3 million times on You Tube. What those 3 million viewers don’t know – but now you do – is that 30 minutes before that performance, I was at Follies, balls-deep in one of the Griffin girls.

I was an angry, bad kid. I would get in a fist fight about once a week when I was in grammar school. I got suspended several times and my parents and I had to go to the school district psychologist a bunch of times. It helped. My mother was an angry person too and it helped her as well. I recommend it for problem kids.

Thankfully my kids were not like that.

Well, I am a space genius, I gave Prince his first pair of assless purple pants, and I am destined to save American and help install the best President we will ever have: Jennifer Lawrence.

You’re welcome!

I had a stripper give me her phone # - and when I tried it received the message "Please hang up and try your call again"

My first review was rejected.

I've seen EastCoasters You Tube video but I did not watch him fucking one of the Griffin girls. :)

Dessert scrub approved my reviews

I rite da best reviews

i’m a shy introvert.

Growing up, I was one of the very top math students in my state.

I have written a dozen reviews of Club Desire and never been accused by desertscrub of writing a club ad.

@heaving

Pics and Vids of the patents or it didn’t happen.

:D

I can write, (and do many things like sports, shoot guns, throw a ball, etc) with either hand, thanks to my brother being born ambidextrous and teaching/training me to become ambidextrous too…

I have Gold Medallion status with Delta but I’m still not very comfortable flying.

Decades long patron of strip clubs and of AMPs.

Seen the rise of mileage in San Francisco, but also seen how that got corrupted when Deja Vu took over.

Their have been times when I have been a habitual and compulsive consumer of services from strip clubs and AMPs, but not now. It was more just because I was married and had no other safe options.

I am not an uncritical consumer of services. I don't take any of it at face value. Rather I relate to the women and get them off script and off sight ASAP.

I helped to put a Pentecostal Daughter Molester into San Quentin. The chance came to me, and so I took it. One does not refuse the Burning Bush.

I call him the Pentecostal Molester because his entire church lined up behind him and against the daughters. They said, "You have to forgive, you HAVE TO".

If these girls had listened to their church and practiced denial, they might have become the clients for that church's outreach ministry.

I tried to impress this on the court, that this was not just an individual perpetrator, it was a corporate machine which preys on children, and then passes the collection basket. And I have made this appeal to local law enforcement.

I like women to dress sexy, slutty, high heels and makeup, thigh high stockings. So I am a natural for strip clubs, and in this regard strip clubs out perform AMPs and civvie night clubs.

Nothing Wrong With Handing Money to Women, But Buying Dances is a Chump's Game.

SJG

^ Your privacy wall sucks.

And you Ishmael are an extreme creep, and it does not matter to me how many times you want to bash your head against my privacy wall, except for the fact that I have to use a wire scrub brush and Clorox to clean your blood and lymph fluid off of my nice wall.

SJG

The Cleaning Ninja: How to Clean Your Home in 8 Minutes Flat and Other Clever Housekeeping Techniques // Courtenay Hartford (2017)

Offers prime points on sanitizing after extreme martial arts demonstrations

^ I should look at that.

SJG

The Baker Gurvitz Army - Memory Lane

www.youtube.com

Coincidence, friend of friend! I am the Cultus chapter leader in my hometown

I have a howto video on YouTube with a 100k views.

I get a lot of compliments on my intelligence and intellect.

I've entered cooking contests.

I have a sneaker collection worth about 30k. Mostly coz of older shoes I've saved. Today's quality is shit in comparison.

I've dabbled in the entertainment industry with a little success.

I haven’t seen my ATF in 10 months and don’t miss her.

I have a 23 year old model from Chime moving in with me tomorrow

^^^ glad to see you still kickin friend!!!!

Gawker. Youre a tuscl living legend. Glad to see you posting

One might say that was a "reverberant" return to TUSCl late last evening!

I won a gold medal in a regional martial arts competition as a kid.

I am a published author and am soon to publish a full-length novel.

With my science background, I embarrassed a pastor who tried to disprove evolution in front of his 2,500 person congregation.

I received a Mathematics Gold Medal once.

SJG

^

A medal out of a Cocoa Puffs box doesn't count!

I am the one Boomers are jealous of! I am fit and in shape and get all the ladies...

^Lol. We been you stupid. You ain't been us.

Guys improve with age, or at least they can.

SJG

@SJG, I could see you having some math chops. You have a Ted Kaczynski vibe about you.

My least favorite customer moment is sitting between two dancers debating who knows more dirt about the club and the management.

Ok I'm going to ask, is Chime an actual place? Or is it phone magic that hacked up Chile or something like that? Because if there's exotic young strippers (er, models) from this Chime place wallanon wants to know lol.

I worked all day after breaking my ankle and went to a club that night. By the time I went to the ER they had to cut my shoe off. I felt ok for the most part until they cut my shoe. Leather dress shoes are expensive.

^whoa!

I once met up and closed a club with JuiceBox69 in North Carolina years and years ago….

Haven’t been to a NC strip club since. Nothing can replicate that night. Still can’t stand the taste of 4loco and Chacken Fingers.

True (old) story.