What to do in this situation with a "regular"
Just some context:- Texted her Monday so see if she would be in the club this week. She responded that she would be in every single night this week. Okay cool, so I left it at that because that's all I needed to know.
- She texts me randomly today (was debating to see her tonight anyway, or the next night for sure) with a "How's your week going? " followed by some other stupid tibid that's not important.
- I responded to her pointless text followed by a "I'm thinking of visiting you either tonight or tomorrow night". I felt this is good on my part, because if she wasn't working this would be the indication to let me know. No response back.
- Based off Mondays text, and her text today, there was no doubt in my mind she would be there tonight. I decided I wanted to do tonight anyway as I potentially had other plans the following day. So I drove up there tonight and arrived pretty early, 2 hours after the club opened.
- When I get to the club, I noticed her name wasn't on the roll call board. So I asked the club manager if she was working tonight and he said yes she is, she just went to go get food real quick. Then the manager wrote her name on the board below everyone else. So I paid the overpriced cover charge and sat my happy ass down.
- I sat around for 30 minutes in a dead club. Finally told myself I should shoot her a text seeing if she would be returning and letting her know I was there. No response.
- Well this isn't happening tonight I realized (had $1k on me for some stripper shit) and got a dance with another girl. When I went to the bathroom I looked down at my pants and saw that there was actual fucking period blood on them. Okay that's cool I guess, but don't forget the weird old man who was also in the bathroom and just splashed his hands with water without washing them during a pandemic. God damn what a night so far. So I left.
I've only seen her three times, and have dropped probably over 3k on VIPS/drinks/tips/etc etc. Too much? Potentially, I'm in a time where I have some fuck you money as I'm entering a new career. I enjoyed the ITC time, and I understand it was nothing more than that even though she has given me her real name, facebook, and she's told me her entire life. blah blah blah. She felt comfortable clearly with me, so I was going to ask for OTC tonight or after was the plan, which I definitely could of asked for sooner.
Honestly I can't say if shes fully to blame, or club is to an extent, but I still think it's bad business on her end. I really don't want to return to that club anymore as well, it's a small area club that is FUCKING dead, so it's super depressing in general with rip off prices. I'm talking no closed off VIP's, vegas pricing, and it is the most garbage club around. Should I tell her I won't be re-returning (not in fuck you kind of way, but like that was really lame) and now bring up OTC? Or just ignore her when the inevitable text comes because her business is that bad and left a client pissed off with period blooded pants I just bought lol.
Thanks and sorry for the long post .
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I think you have been overspending. Text her and let her know you want to see her OTC. If she doesn't respond, find another stripper. I would not spend more than $400 for OTC.
do not play games. She will win. She will not play by any rules and she doesn't care about anything but money. Yours will do as well as some other guy's and his as well as yours.
The period blood is not her doing. Do not confuse the situation by bringing it up. let her know you went when you said you would and she wasn't there. She lost out on good money. Ask her if she would like to meet up for a private session.
the money you are throwing at her in a single night could get you a threesome in a hot tub for a few hours.
If you wanna club even if she's not there, then go without expectations.
If you going depends on her being there, text her a few hours before saying you will be at club if she's there and will she be there and by what time - and if she ghosts you, don't make the trip. And if she says she'll be there but isn't without texting that, fuck that, it'd be game over for me.
Don't get uptight about the events as described in post, and don't be an RIL.
I may not be the poster boy for fucked over but I'm carrying a sign.
Listen to all the good advice on this board but if you continue to go to SC's don't be disappointed when you're fucked over once again. Have fun I do lol
This is a HUGE point everyone else (except wyohio) seems to be missing. I get irritated if a stripper misses an appointment with me, but there was no appointment made. elitecorey, anyone inexperienced, naive, or foolish enough to believe a stripper will be there when she tells you her schedule, or the club when they tell you who is there, is just going to run into this over and over, and be frustrated over and over. As someone who typically makes appointments with his fave strippers, I will tell you I exactly follow wyohio's advice... actually, I go beyond, since I typically know when I'm going to schedule an SC trip a couple of days in advance. So on Wednesday, I'll text her, "I'm headed to the club Friday, are you working, or can you add on?", then I text her within an hour of when I'm going. If she doesn't respond to either text, either I don't go, or go to another club, or go but expect she might not be there and I'll need to switch to plan B. It is COMPLETELY unrealistic to have a stripper tell you her schedule a week in advance, and then think she'll actually stick to it. All of that is your mistake. Her mistake in not texting you back, too, given how much you've spent on her, but not the end of the world. In the end, you had a terrible experience because you had incredibly unrealistic expectations.
If you're too irritated right now to deal with her, then move on. Otherwise, I'd chalk this up to poor decisions on your part, and consider either just texting her to ask her OTC, or try to see her ITC one more time but this time follow the protocol
But I'm with you on the other stuff. There is no excuse for the club shining you on or the other dancer rubbing menstrual blood on you.
T-Shirt
https://teeshirt21.com/product/pathetic-…
SJG
skibum609 - Hey thanks for the response as well, to be honest there all no "losses", I enjoyed my time it was money well spent. I understand the relationship between a customer and a stripper, so I was not so "attached" to begin with, I just wanted some other opinions on the matter
twentyfive - true that!
K - All of that seems definitively true. You're right about the blood incident, but yes you are correct on the "anything but money" issue as well. I just see it as a business transaction, and she just happened to have bad business (the part I don't like about this)
DrStab - I actually agree with you, that is my strat and she has texted me three times back to back this morning. I believe following any RP philosophy will work on a women, since AWALT.
ATACdawg - I love how this board can't make up it's mind. You either can't get OTC without 3-4 visits (what I've seen a decent amount on here), or your san jose guy making out with strippers in the front room. I do actually agree establishing rapport for OTC is important, that is the route I went. Yes, dances are a chumps game, but if you don't play a game a little I doubt you are getting OTC.
JimmyMcNulty - Agreed. Maybe I should have been more direct, but once again I've been lurking this forum, and everyone has said being direct in terms of appointments/times gives all the power to her and shows that SHE IS YOURS only. She is not mine only, I don't want a stripper "owning me", and I feel like I don't need to text her letting her know I'm 10 minutes away from the club/etc.
Papi_Chulo - Definitely not, I wanted to get some others opinions. on the matter especially those that are veterans. I'm not here to troll.
Estafador - That is a fair point, there was NO direct confirmation of date/time, but you have look at the context of the situation. I'm strictly business, I thought her texting me were all signs that she was looking for someone to come in that night. I believe she actually did end up coming back that night, as I received a text around the clubs closing time. Regardless, yes going forward direct confirmation might be the key, but I've lurked this forum and you will find many posts from veterans on why that's a bad idea. I followed that advice.
wyohio - Good post, thanks for the tips. I will keep all that in mind going forward.
DeclinetoState - I've commented on the direct confirmation issue in a couple of posts above. Yes, that's one way to do it. But yes, the club situation wasn't on her I was just spelling out why I was sort of done with that club to begin with. I swear though if you browse this forum, you will find a decent amount of posts telling you not to be the guy to "schedule" set times with her or what ever.
Elmder Fudd - Thank you and yes so far world of strippers and escorts isn't so bright after all (who would of known right? ;)). In the end you are correct though, its all about YOU having fun and not letting SS get to ya. Thanks for the post
Subraman - Okay fair enough. Good points and good advice, lesson learned. But yes her not texting back is the issue, why the fuck do you even text me "So does the rain make you lazy as well?" with zero follow up. I'm not here to text back and fourth, I want to know when you're working.
rickdugan - No I didn't expect her to "wait patiently" for me. I used my insight on the situation and everything surrounding it to make a decision to drive up. She was there, she went to get food and didn't return until way later (she texted me around the time the club closed, so that's what I think actually happened). So I wasn't too off the mark with my insight, what I was off about was that she's a stripper and doesn't play by normal rules.
To update the situation, around ~2am (around the time the club closes), I received a text that said: "I want to see you". I responded later saying that I don't think I'll be returning to the club anymore in a polite way, explaining why (not her part, but the club incidents). She responds with a laughing emoji and "Okay", lol... She then texts me this morning with "Good morning handsome, I hope you are over what happened last night. You could have called me and it would of been a different kind of experience! What girl did you have a dance with?" . No, I don't think calling her would of changed anything lol. I'll chalk this one up as a lost because I have no interest of doing ITC with her anymore, OTC is unlikely now as well. Oh well lets keep it moving
At least half of the problems in this world would never happen if everyone did this every time.
SJG
I will pay along.
“Nothing Someone Says Before The Word But Really Counts...”
You keep writing “This advice is correct “but” I won’t follow it because...(excuses, overthinking, misinformation etc)
“You teach people how to treat you.”
I suggest that you tell the girl (stripper or sugar baby or civilian) what you need/want regarding being on time and or letting each other know in advance (this is the key to no get upset, enough advance notice) if anything changes or you have to reschedule.
If you’re just getting to know a potential ATF and she is late more than once or not show, your know she has failed to honor basic social conventions in such a fundamental way that I don’t believe it is worth your time to try to change her behavior.
If she doesn’t get it by now, and adult 18 years or older when will she ever get it?
I have told a Fav before that I don’t wait for doctors, lawyers, teachers, priest etc or even family members more than 15 minutes, without communication or explanation.
Now days with cellphones is even easier to let each other know if you are going to be late.
I explained to her that having people waiting is a power trip, is disrespectful and you would be wasting their time, and time/life is one of the most valuable things.
Needless to say she failed to show up one time for OTC after a handful of good meetings, I texted her, no response, I left after 15 minutes.
Next day she gave me a lame excuse she was sick and fell asleep at a girlfriend’s. And asked to please give her one last chance. We meet a couple more times for OTC and it was OK.
The third time again she was a no show, after 15 minutes I sent her a text telling her “I waited for you 15 minutes for the last time”.
I haven seen her after, she texted me and left me voicemail messages apologizing and trying to get together for OTC, I never responded to her.
Make sure that you let her know that you prioritize reliability above almost all other traits as you search for a lasting relationship with an ATF.
My last FAV and I will agree to meet for VIP and was never late, if something came up we would let the other know and reschedule accordingly. One the best girls I have had the pleasure, worth every penny and every second I spent with her.
She texted me one last time to let me know she was moving and tanked me for the good times.
I said in another thread but perhaps OTC might be a good move during this time. Especially if you are spending $1k per visit. You can have fun at a hotel with many porn stars for that money.
That sounds like very sound advice to me!
SJG
so for this google ""OTC" TUSCL".
https://www.google.com/search?q=OTC+tusc…
sounds like you have a fun night ahead, let us know how it went
JJ Grey & Mofro - The Sun Is Shining Down
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7cYRs2SR…
https://tuscl.net/article.php?id=912
SJG
TJ Street
https://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5449/96322…
Mexico City
http://doxyspotting.com/?p=148561
Hope tonite goes well.
First text I sent her today when I manned up: Hey *cute nickname we gave each other*, do you offer anything outside the club? Hotel date? Or something of that kind. I understand your time is valuable, just thought I’d ask’
Her response: ‘sounds like a great idea! Tonight would work for me! 12:30 work?’ (Military time)
My response: ’8:30 pm? Sure. To be clear you understand what I mean by hotel date right ? Not your sugar daddy’s ideas of a hotel date lol. Not overnight as well, $300 fair ? I’ll text you location soonish’ - she told me itc that she has a sugar who rents two separate rooms, no sex lol.
my response: - 8:30 pm? Sure. To be clear you understand what I mean by hotel date right ? Not your sugar daddy’s ideas of a hotel date lol. Not overnight as well, $300 fair ? I’ll text you location soonish’
Her: ’Sounds good’
So I book the hotel room, and get ready for this sudden 2 hour window I had to get ready. I show up to the hotel, and send her the location but with no room number. I also text her the location, but no room number and say text me when you are here and I’ll meet you in the lobby. She shows up at 8:17 and I still can’t believe how the rest of the night went down from here.
First we go back to the room and get drinks in the hotel lobby. We sit and chat for a bit and it was definitely the same vibe/chemistry we had in the club. We head back to the room and that’s when the action begins. Everything I expected and more, well not quite, because I literally thought it was going to be a quick fuck and that would be the end of it, she would leave and I even had other plans for the night.
Well let’s just sum up that she literally ended up leaving at 5:30 in the morning! I had a complete total of 9 hours with her lol! Complete GFE experience, literally fucked 4-5x times, and we talked and talked, watched the tv in the room and laughed together with each other for a combined laughing total of 3 hours honestly. We had complete chemistry, ‘Why are we like this?’ She asked, and I was wondering the same damn thing. Based on my reading on this forum, I believe this is far from the norm. Now the realization hits that she’s a stripper, so I’m trying to refrain from feels and keep the mindset that she isn’t mine, it was just my turn. For $300 I still had an amazing time, and I think the lesson here is don’t be a bitch, don’t assume things, and bring straight forward is your best bet if you want OTC. Not sure what this will lead to, if anything, but this was the ultimate confidence boost to a 24 year old that managed to pull a complete beauty from the club. Thanks guys, most of you had some valuable insight and it definitely helped me further this. Now I no longer will be in the club wasting money, at least for now!
You reminded me of George Costanza in Seinfeld episode about doing the opposite.
You should try it.
“Jerry Seinfeld : If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right.
George Costanza : Yes, I will do the opposite. I used to sit here and do nothing, and regret it for the rest of the day, so now I will do the opposite, and I will do something!”
Good Times, Good Times, enjoy your “Hotel Date”
Ps me when I read your story
https://youtu.be/pqE66RltUaQ
Pics or didn’t happen.
Good times, good times
Sometimes sex with women (strippers or civilians) happens and you don’t even know what you were doing right.
Good for you for having the experience and sharing with us.
Just get ready for a wild ride, think about what you want in this emerging relationship.
Just remember nothing in this capitalist society is ever free you will pay one way or another.
Just make sure you get what you pay for and are happy about the transaction.
Your mention of laughing together is a good indicator you did something right:
“Comedians might be funny, but they don’t “make” us laugh. We release laughter from deep within ourselves when conditions feel right.
You made her feel safe, comfortable, relaxed, and she was able to laugh and probably was aroused enough to let herself go enough to enjoy the sex too.
Laughing and orgasms have a lot in common. They both relieve physical tension and stress. They release endorphins to give you an overall sense of well-being. They can also boost your immune system.
Two of the best things in life are laughing and orgasms, you should make this relationship a learning experience on how to do this with your “hotel date”.
Just prepare for the worst and hope for the best. And enjoy the experience.
Good luck and be careful out there.
"So I book the hotel room,"
If you keep booking the hotel room before she shows up to the OTC, you should expect that you will very often pay for a hotel room that you use alone -- very common with new (to you) OTC girls is that they don't show, even if they confirmed 4 hours earlier. Have her meet you at a bar or restaurant in or near the hotel, buy her a drink and/or dinner, and book the room through an app while you're at the table. Anything else will lead to lots of wasted hotel rooms.
"Not sure what this will lead to, if anything,"
This statement is always a red blinking stop sign. What do you mean what it will lead to? Like she might become your girlfriend or something? What it will lead to, hopefully, is more fun OTCs. Any other confusion about what it might lead to, and you should put a pause on this entirely.
"Well let’s just sum up that she literally ended up leaving at 5:30 in the morning! I had a complete total of 9 hours with her lol!"
And now you've figured out what makes OTC so amazing, and why it's worth putting in a little effort pursuing it
others have touched on this. I will be as clear as I can. If you are thinking this way may lead to a real BF/GF relationship, stop seeing her. NOW.
12:30 military time is 12:30 PM. 8:30 PM is 20:30
PRISON BITCH! PRISON BITCH! PRISON BITCH!
Now my question for you experienced OTC'ers is if I want to maintain this to be a monthly event while keeping the "connection" and completely eliminating ITC all together, do I have to maintain some personal communication with her through texting? I'm talking very-very occasionally, as for one I learned long ago texting is a gigantic waste of time. I feel like though I just can't flat out not text her, or the risk of being "dropped" is higher right? Like if your presence is not occasionally known, you would think a stripper could easily forget about you completely in a week. Thoughts on this? Or would scheduling another OTC experience whenever the fuck I want be fine?
Texts should be on point if you are trying to set something up. " Are you available next Wednesday from 5 Pm for one of our hotel dates"
Other texts are fine as long as you do not flood her with them. I trade frequent check in texts with some of the ladies I see OTC. Some of them like it and some don't.
Send her a check in, how are you, the other night was a lot of fun, I look forward to the next time. Something like that and see how she responds.
BTW, in my experience most expect breakfast to be offered if they leave at that time of the morning or later.
building on twentyfive's and CJkent's comments, she is more likely to pick the guy she had fun with over the guy it was all business. IMO, this is one of the best differences between an escort and OTC with a dancer.
So is it fair to say that an OTC relationship is always the primary focus is money
I'm going to spit some thoughts out because this is actually an intriguing hobby and I like discussion, so why not.
Okay - so we're all in agreement the relation to her is money first. Pretty much the text book definition of a stripper at the heart. So it got me thinking about this unusual OTC experience I had with CLEAR attraction. Okay maybe that's not unusual (attraction), because if a stripper is doing OTC with someone there probably has to be some form of attraction in the first place.
Now what does that mean? Not a damn thing because she's a stripper and I'm paying regardless if she is attracted to me. Attraction doesn't apply like it would in a traditional relationship, because this isn't one. But I do believe women are prone to certain behaviors, and are capable
@k - I think we are on the same page. I'm not saying texting isn't a valuable tool, because it's a great tool if used wisely.
Drop the rest of your shit or risk having this blow up in your face.
"Why can't you flip the script on a stripper for your own benefit, especially knowing their insecurities? All women are the same, no?"
You have a good thing going. Why fuck it up with playing games? What script are you flipping? Just go with what worked. Have a drink and a meal, take her to a hotel room, open a bottle of wine and fuck your brains out. Go your separate ways in the morning and enjoy your lives without any complications or drama. What more do you expect to get by flipping a script or playing on her insecurities?
All women are not the same. Strippers and all women are people. Do not play games.
Most of us in tuscl were at some point in the past young and naive (stupid too).
Most of us are no longer young...
You at 24 in the present are still young and “naive”...
Your question:
So is it fair to say that an OTC relationship is always the primary focus is money?
Deserves to be answered again in hopes you would understand it, and accept it, yes OTC IS ABOUT THE MONEY, ALWAYS.
Like in any business there are people that are nice, professional, offer friendly service and “it is a pleasure doing business with them”.
But at the end o of the day it is ALWAYS ABOUT THE MONEY, ALWAYS.
I am sure you are not getting lucky with civilians of the caliber of your “hotel day” stripper, because you are so excited and can’t believe this even happened.
We all have had experiences like “The donkey that played the flute”, meaning something that occurs by chance.
And we don’t know what we did to deserve that, but are thankful and enjoy the experience and the memories.
My All Time Favorite Stripper, Ally, started dancing when I was going to see a Current Favorite Ariel.
Ally was just over 20 years, sweet, beautiful and shy. She became friendly and would seat with me while I was waiting for my CF, would let me know if my CF was not there, would tell the waitresses to let Ariel know I have arrived. Once she was tired and fell asleep on my shoulder and thanked me for letting her sleep and rest.
One time when my CF didn’t show up I asked Ally to go to the 15 minute VIP, she was so sweet and excited. We had to wait for a “room” and she sat in my lap and we made out like teenagers. Once in the VIP we went as close as humanly possible to Full Service but didn’t do FS.
After the VIP I asked Ally if she would be interested in OTC and gave her my number, but she say she didn’t do that.
I keep going to visit my CF and she didn’t show up another time and I took Ally to the VIP again, and again we were so close to FS.
I was still visiting my CF both weekends, when Ally texted me on a weekday to ask me if I was still interested on OTC with her, I answer of course I am.
We made an appointment, I went to pick her up near her place and we went to a small hotel and had a very nice experience. Ally was a sweet and nice Baby Stripper.
Ally and I developed a Sugar Baby type of relationship we had OTC almost every week for more than two years.
I would pick her up on Sunday afternoon, get a nice hotel room and make love, massage each other, have room service, sometimes we would go to dinner to a really nice place. She would refer to me as her fiancé to other people, her sister told me.
I have thousands of pictures of her modeling cute sexy outfits I got for her. Around Halloween she was slave princesses Lea from Star Wars, Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, Playboy Bunny. Around Christmas a sexy miss Santa, naughty school girl.
Like I said Ally was a baby stripper when we meet, very sweet and nice, the sex got better and better because she was more comfortable and felt safe relaxed and was able to let herself go and enjoy it, I enjoyed it too, she would experience multiple orgasms and was very shy and sweet about it.
Sometimes she would spend the night and would fall a sleep with her head on my chest like the little angel she was.
She texted me one last time letting me know she was moving on and thanking me for the relationship...
She was worth every penny and every second I spent on her.
Thank you for making me remember that relationship.