Decision time after a long chat

avatar for Pyroxl
Pyroxl
Yonder
What do you if a dancer talks to you for a long time with ok to good conversation but is not your type physically, when she eventually asks for a dance?

1> Get a dance, or more
2> Say no thanks
3> Tip her without a dance
4> Buy her a drink
5> Other

36 comments

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avatar for Gabebj
Gabebj
6 years ago
I tip them and say next time.
avatar for Hank Moody
Hank Moody
6 years ago
You mean after I let her know 10 minutes in that I’m waiting for someone else? Probably tip her a few bucks or at least buy her a drink.
avatar for Lovelyeast
Lovelyeast
6 years ago
Did you inform her before or after?
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
6 years ago
I don’t let it get to “a long time” without explaining that I’m not interested.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
I usally don't try to engage them - my answers are short or just a nod or smile - or I'll just go to my go-to and tell them I just wanna chill and watch the stage (I'm not good at just telling them straight-up I'm not interested).

If I end up engaging them then usually I'll get a dance or maybe just tip them.
avatar for BoringLoser
BoringLoser
6 years ago
If I did nothing to encourage her to stick around for 10 minutes I would just say no thanks. If she got me interested in the interaction and that’s why I let her stick around for 10 minutes, I would probably give her dance to see what that’s like.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
6 years ago
gmd + 1

I also try not to let it go on more than a song - the longer it goes the more awkward it feels/becomes
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
If I allow them to stay with me, at the very least I'll throw her a tip, I'm pretty good about not letting the ones I have no interest in, know that I'm not interested.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
6 years ago
3, but it's gonna be half a dance or less
avatar for Cowboy12
Cowboy12
6 years ago
I usually let them know right away that I'm waiting for someone else. If they stay and the conversation is good, I would probably get a dance or 2 from her.
One time this happened to me, the dances were some of the best I ever had, so it was worth it.
avatar for Nidan111
Nidan111
6 years ago
At least tip her. Conversation is part of the overall experience.
avatar for vajmon
vajmon
6 years ago
#2, say no thanks and tell her next time like maybe never. Strip clubs aren't regular bars. You're not there to make friends or find a girlfriend. The ladies there are all hustling, trying to scam you out of your money anyway they can. Including engaging in convo with someone they know won't buy a dance from them because there's no physical attraction. So they think they can get money another way buy scamming drinks where that get a kickback or hoping you feel guilty that you wasted their time engaging in a conversation they started and you really didn't want to get into in the first place. Fuck those ho's, they don't deserve any money unless you started the conversation!
avatar for vajmon
vajmon
6 years ago
@Nidan, "At least tip her. Conversation is part of the overall experience." Fuck that shit! Don't be such a pussy! Part of the strip club experience is to tell some ugly money-grubbing skank that you're not interested no matter how long she tried to cock block you.
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
6 years ago
You don't let it get that far. That's a rookie mistake.
avatar for anthony6613
anthony6613
6 years ago
Get a dance if the conversation was good. A pair of lips is a pair of lips.
avatar for WILLYSGOTAHUCOW
WILLYSGOTAHUCOW
6 years ago
I agree that you dont let it get that far. I dont even know what "not my type physically" means in the SC. Your not trying to date or marry her. If shes not the best looking girl in the bar, tip her a dollar after a minute and stay focused on getting the girl you want for a dance. Dont give her your time as pity. She's working there because enough guys go to dance with her and leading her on may her lost her a few dances.
avatar for K
K
6 years ago
I tell them early on that I welcome their company and conversation but am not going to get a dance. Tipping them is based on many factors.
avatar for vajmon
vajmon
6 years ago
Tipping some bitch for locking you in a conversation that you didn't want to get into in the first place not only screws yourself but ruins it for the rest of us because going forward she'll pull that same shit with other dudes. It's like giving money to beggars and buskers on the street. Once people give them money the number of them multiplies and they become even more aggressive because they feel their fucking entitled to be tipped since other people are wimps and give in to their scamming. No tip!!!
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
6 years ago
It doesn't happen often, but if it's a club that serves alcohol I've probably already done 4 by then and she gets a 3 and goes on her way. If it's bad conversation those typically end quickly, so I probably needed to kill some time to see the lineup, wanted more information about how the club worked, or was bored but didn't feel like leaving yet.
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
6 years ago
#3 I can learn something especially if I’m new to the club. Throw her a few bucks ain’t bad.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
IF you're too much of a pussy to tell her you're not interested and send her on her way within the first few minutes, be a decent person and tip her a little for her time. Consider it a "little bitch" tax for staying quiet.

If you were straightforward that you're not getting dances from her and she stayed anyway -- once in a long while they'll stay anyway -- then go with your conscience
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
6 years ago
I'm with gmd & Subra, and pretty much every one else. Don't let it get that far. If a dancer I find unattractive approaches me, I'll usually waive her off before she even starts or tell her within the first few sentences of our conversation that I'm not getting any dances. If she doesn't leave I don't really engage her, nor do I feel compelled to compensate her for the time she chose to waste after I made it clear I wasn't interested. While I do enjoy chatting and drinking with strippers its only the hot ones I do it with.

If a dancer I'm on the fence about comes over I may engage and chat with her to see if I enjoy her company. If she fails to win me over, I'm not buying a pity dance. I may or may not tip, depending on how it went. If I feel like I actively encouraged her to stay with me, I'll probably tip her a token amount. If I just didn't send her on her way & she chose to stay and invest her time, I may not. I'm not buying her a drink unless I want her to stay.

There's a line between wasting a strippers time, which I consider rude and try not to do, and being a little pussy and letting a stripper you're not into hustle you, which I don't do.
avatar for Musterd21
Musterd21
6 years ago
I will offer to buy them a drink. If they are not old enough to drink I am not interested. I end up with a lot of newbies. They usually are not real good and are not much into drinking. But I am nice to them.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
6 years ago
Like some others on here, I don't let it get to that point before telling them that I'm not buying anything.
avatar for Icey
Icey
6 years ago
I wouldn't chat with a girl I'm not interested in unless she's a friend. Otherwise you're wasting her time and hustle. Just say no up front, if you do waste her time at least tip her for it
avatar for Musterd21
Musterd21
6 years ago
I have said no upfront and after they go around and find nothing else come back and let me buy them a drink.
avatar for Pyroxl
Pyroxl
6 years ago
Followup, tipping a few bucks isn't consequential of course. What if the girl expects something like 80 for tips because, as she says, that's what the last guy tipped her for maybe 20-30min of chatting. I guess it'd make me interrupt earlier on to say I'm not interested in getting a dance if that's the norm for that club.
avatar for wallanon
wallanon
6 years ago
"What if the girl expects something like 80 for tips because, as she says, that's what the last guy tipped her for maybe 20-30min of chatting."

Some polite variation on 'who gives a fuck what the last guy did, that guy was an idiot' will usually do. For me, it's usually 'well, each guy is different' or silence and non-verbal acknowledgment works wonders. Many less experienced strippers will flee from awkward silence.
avatar for Darkblue999
Darkblue999
6 years ago
In first few minutes I will let her know I am waiting for somebody as soon as I realize her looks are not my type
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
-->"What if the girl expects something like 80 for tips because, as she says, that's what the last guy tipped her for maybe 20-30min of chatting. I guess it'd make me interrupt earlier on to say I'm not interested in getting a dance if that's the norm for that club."

I'm skeptical that's the norm for any club. If a girl is asking for $80 for hanging out for 20 minutes uninvited, maybe she's sensing you're weak? Why hadn't you gotten rid of her earlier -- could it be that she could tell you were scared, and she could pressure you into other things, too?
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
6 years ago
Pyroxl, again, the simple answer is don't tie her up for 20-30 minutes if you're not interested in her. It's also tying you up too, which you should care about unless you're entertainment time is limitless.

But on a secondary note, if any girl you sit with surprises you with a big tipping expectation, just say no. Simple. Her expectation is irrelevant and what some other guy paid her is not your problem. What matters is what value you place on her time in the seat next to you. If she doesn't like that answer, so what?
avatar for Cristobal
Cristobal
6 years ago
I don't talk to dancers I'm not interested in, I don't want to waste anyone's time, especially mine.

I just try to be polite and say "I'm good tight now" and wave them off.

Another scam is a girl starts grinding on you and then asks for a tip, I don't tip and politely say "no thanks" or" I'm good" but it's more difficult with a nice ass in your lap.
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
6 years ago
Others have said it well too but I especially like the way Subraman put it in his first comment.
avatar for Pyroxl
Pyroxl
6 years ago
"Many less experienced strippers will flee from awkward silence."

Might try this for the entertainment value.
avatar for loper
loper
6 years ago
I had an unusual experience last night where a girl who was thicker than I normally like stopped to chat and I let her. It turned out that she was really sweet and as I got to know her more her hotness factor increased to the point where I actually asked her for a dance -- ended up getting 2. I like it when I surprise myself.

Normally, however, I just tell them that I won't be getting a dance or that I already got a dance from someone else who satisfied me.
avatar for rogertex
rogertex
6 years ago
loper +1

Bit different response here ... I tip anyone and everyone that is being nice to me or trying to be nice to me. It's a fun and fantasy land. If a dancer is being nice - seldom seen one that is gross enough to not get a dance or two. Dances are not costly in Texas - $20 max with sweet and warm 2-way contact.
And really majority of Texan dancers are sweet and beautiful businesswomen in panties.

I can see a different situation in Northern US clubs - mean bitches ready to pick up a fight, miscounting dances, ROBs, expensive dances, not enough dancers to go around, stalking customers, etc. It's a different world in Massachusetts, Northern Cali, and such places.

Few observations in Texas:
1. Strip clubs are a big turnover industry. 90%+ new dancers every six months. In any given shift 20% dancers are new. Often young. Talking gives them composure and some self confidence. Unlike what we have been told or read - quite a few dancers who sit to talk on their own - are simply feeling the club patrons and getting comfortable with the environment. Not thinking about it as a veiled hustle. And are prepared to hear a no.
2. I personally don't mind good talkers and of course would enjoy one that has a hot body to go with it.
3. I have seen some customers are absolutely rude to newbie dancers. That's a sure way to drive off young women from stripping.

All said, an opening line of "wanna dance" will get a "No thanks" from me, with few exceptions.
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