Do you have fantasies about dancers and love?
Cashman1234
He/Him - He’s a filthy pig. That’s him in VIP with another whore.
When I'm paying to f--k a dancer OTC (or ITC) I'm not thinking of love. I'm thinking how I will get off with a sexy girl.
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I am old enough that I no longer even fantasize about it, I tend to truly like my ATFs and have kept in contact with a couple who retired many years ago, but I am not interested in having a real romantic relationship with a stripper, on any level whatsoever. 8 years ago -- I *said* I didn't want that, but can look back and realize I fantasized about it now and then
BTW, I NEVER fell for a stripper when I went to extras clubs; it's only when I transitioned significantly to non-extras clubs that I ever even fantasized about this -- maybe I need the princess fantasy, and her fucking guy after guy behind the curtain kills it :)
When I was in my mid/late 20s, I had an ATF at the Satin Doll in Providence that I fell for pretty hard. I hadn't seen her OTC and I hadn't even gotten extras from her ITC (I was such a naive noob). But, she and I really "connected". We talked a lot. She told me about her son. We really hit it off. Etc., etc.
So, after I'd been going to see her (and spend money on her) weekly for perhaps 2 to 3 months I decided to take the plunge and tell her how I felt and ask her out on a date. And I did! When I was done asking her out, she looked at me with real disappointment and said (summarizing), "Sweetie, you're a customer. And I'm never going to date a customer. Maybe you should start hanging out with another girl."
So, in a way, I actually did find my rainbow unicorn stripper. But instead of the "stripper with a heart of gold" who would magically transform from sex worker to loyal-but-sexy-crazed girlfriend, I found the one stripper that was nice enough to not strip mine a RIL for all the cash he's worth.
I was heartbroken (but lucky to not be financially ruined) and that led to my first long break from strip clubbing. When I got back into it, I had a very different mindset. I like the strippers I see in and out of the club, and I may consider them casual friends. But no more than that.
It works for me.
I like the afterglow of visiting a fun girl, and will have flashbacks of stuff we did together, as I grind through the workweek looking at files on my laptop. But I don't imagine either of us confessing deep feelings.
There's always another one around the corner.
I won't admit to an ATF, but I had an RIL experience a few years ago. It involved a domestic violence hustle and didn't end well. I haven't gotten that wrapped up since.
The harmless fantasies quickly passed.
As a RIL or feelings of love? No.
SJG
I would tend to agree with MrDeuce's evaluation. I've definitely become cautious, but not completely cynical. I guess I believe that unicorns really do exist, that there really is the stripper with a heart of gold who wants to get out and be in a real relationship. Is that being overly naive? Probably.
I have always been disappointed by the looks / appearance / sexiness of the civilian women whom I have met and/or dated in non-strip-club life. I started going to strip clubs merely because I was desperate to get my hands on someone who was (in my assessment) HOT ENOUGH to turn me on, to get me to want to fuck her.
So, do I have fantasies about "love" with any particular stripper? Not really, I don't think, "Oh maybe she really likes me." I am able to walk away at the end of the night and leave that stuff inside the club. But, to the contrary, do I have fantasies about having "love" and it being with someone who also could be any ol' stripper? Oh hell yeah ...
Shit happens brother
Not all bull Shit with these bitches
We were both right. As soon as I stopped supporting her she stopped calling & texting me.
I ain't the one - you're gonna rope in and continually get money from.
I ain't the one - to fall in love with a dancer
I ain't the one - to try and bully into giving you a tip when you haven't done anything.
I ain't the one ...
There are more, but I digress lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STtwzLVA…
Im not so sure ab them fantasizing ab being in love in return. I think sex and love are more blurry for men than women tho, bc of how important sex is to men and to their own feelings of self worth and personal happiness, despite society's generally accepted idea that it's women who fall in love bc of sex. It's more like women want to love the men they are having sex with, but it doesn't mean they do. The blurry line for women is w men who take care of them (not in a sexual pleasure sense).
To answer the question, probably not. I do like my CF a lot though.
My current fav I see OTC, I off and on fall for her. She'll say or do something when we are OTC and it makes me think wow, she does have some genuine feelings or wants to get with me. However, days later she does something and I'll say to myself what the hell was I thinking.
But my experience has always been that if you treat them just as you would treat any other woman, you will quickly see that they reciprocate.
SJG
I agree. Her simple hey message have me thinking...where, when, funds lol
Love fantasies? Fuck no. Lol.
I've missed that.
And really. You cannot get any more pathetically lost than finding yourself heartbroken with blue balls over a stripper that never really loved you in the first place!
I think a good defense to falling into the trap is to live the fantasy of being more of a baller at the club with hot chicks that just want your big dick rather than being a win her heart romancer. PL LIFE, BITCHES!!!
I agree with BJ99 too. Men have a harder time differentiating between lust and love for a woman than women do for men.
SJG
Tied up in political matters now.
We have lots of new people on this forum. JS69 gets credit because rather than just cheating on his wife, he made the very hard decision which is sometimes necessary, and divorced her.
SJG
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