What's the lesson here?

Lone_Wolf
Arizona
So awhile back I had a favorite that was sexy and fun as hell. She loved to party. We ended up spending a lot of time together and eventually she became comfortable sharing a lot about her personal life with me.

She told me she signed up on a popular dating site and met some nice young stud that took her out on a few dates. This dude went all out with flowers, gifts, nice restaurants etc...the whole chivalry thing. This is understandable, as I would have done the exact same thing had I met her in the civie world in my younger years as she is smoking hot with a boner making sexy flirtatious vibe.

Anyway, she said she never put out for the guy. Never gave up the pussy. Said she liked him but just wasn't feeling it despite all the fancy dating etiquette he employed. I tended to believe her as she wasn't shy about sharing her other sexual debauchery.

I felt her lack of putting out for this guy was somewhat ironic as I would often enjoy her company p4p anytime I wanted. No flowers required.

There's a lesson in this story and to most I know it would be apparent but to me its not that black and white. Sincerely.

One thing though, it would be easy for a civie dude to fall hard for one of these sexy honeys never realizing the kind of crazy p4p activity she was into previously. Crazy stuff.

Final note, thru the years I lost contact with this sexy baby doll. I heard a rumor she doing time in jail for something. I miss her. One in million this one.

31 comments

Latest

  • MikeRoberts2
    •
    7 years ago
    why debase yourself by kissing a girls ass? they are never going to respect you like that. girls like to work for a challenge, not a guy who is so lonely that he acts so desperate.
  • lizard27
    •
    7 years ago
    The simple answer is that he was going for the LTR vibe by way of the traditional chivalry route, when at the end of the day, a girl wants her hair pulled and to be called a dirty whore by a guy whose confidence screams "I just don't give a fuck". I imagine if the Tinder (or whatever) date had escalated his sexuality early and smoothly enough, she would have put out.
  • GoVikings
    •
    7 years ago
    Hmmm, so she went on multiple dates with the dude and never put out? Seems like that's unusual (especially for a stripper....strippers seem like they would be MORE open/freaky/comfortable with sexuality). Seems like sex usually happens after a few dates, sometimes sooner.

    As if women weren't already hard enough to read, now there's this story :-)
  • twentyfive
    •
    7 years ago
    Betcha that was just SS, like I only do this with you.
  • stripfighter
    •
    7 years ago
    Guys don't understand women... whereas most guys act more consistent regardless of situation, women are different dependent on environment not to mention timing.
  • jackslash
    •
    7 years ago
    Bitches be crazy.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    7 years ago
    NGFL - nice guys finish last.

    Nothing wrong with what the guy did - chivalrous or not, w/o confidence most guys are doomed (you can't have two pussies in a relationship).
  • twentyfive
    •
    7 years ago
    ^^^How about in lesbian relationships ?
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    7 years ago
    The lesson here is that using romance to get sex is a chump's game. It's better, easier, and infinitely more reliable, to just pay for the pussy.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    7 years ago
    @ GoV:

    It's not uncommon for women to hold out when they want a serious relationship, the pussy is their trump-card thus they'll hold it till the end - i.e. many dudes lose interest, and perhaps respect, when a girl gives it up right away
  • HungryGiraffe
    •
    7 years ago
    Agree with PC and JS69, and those on here who espouse the "Just ask!" system. The romancer was outted as a whimp and played like a fiddle. Funny, fucking strippers is so easy it nearly makes picking up chicks in bars and dance clubs, or any civvie venue, obsolete.
  • GoVikings
    •
    7 years ago
    "Guys don't understand women."

    you can say that again
  • JAprufrock
    •
    7 years ago
    Interesting pieces of advice here. I might have been that guy in my younger days, some 25 years ago. Now that I'm back in play after my marriage dissolved, I feel I have no time for games. We end up paying for it one way or another. Might as well avoid the noise, drama and baggage.
  • joc13
    •
    7 years ago
    @twentyfive. There's always one who wears the strap on more than the other! Just ask em.

    @JS69 "infinitely more reliable" - Amen, brother!

    @Papi Yep. I'm friends with a girl that was a potential SB but backed out cause she didn't want to end up having feelings for a married guy. So, she's been trying to "regular date" and has been telling me about her progress. She's very sexual, so often ends up having sex with a guy on first date, and then rarely hears from him again. If she does, the guy is just wanting to skip the date part and go right to the sex.

    I've never fallen in love with a woman AFTER I've had sex with her.
  • Mr_Kay
    •
    7 years ago
    She didn't fuck the guy because she could tell he was a cunt
  • Mate27
    •
    7 years ago
    Women don't understand themselves.

    Ever have a woman change her mind? My guess is Kobe Bryant and several other athletes have found that out, and simply kept going.

    Women's emotions can change on a dime, and are highly deceptive. They use emotions as a pawn.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    7 years ago
    If you don't want to end up missing her, then you need to maintain contact. This world is not set up for that, but the organization I am building is.

    As far as dating sites, why don't these guys just approach a girl f2f? These guys that use dating sites have something which is not right about them. That is how I see it.

    SJG
  • GoVikings
    •
    7 years ago
    "As far as dating sites, why don't these guys just approach a girl f2f? These guys that use dating sites have something which is not right about them. That is how I see it."

    i don't think there's anything wrong with someone who uses dating sites, but i agree that a face to face in person approach is a much better method. the problem with dating sites like tinder is the girls are gonna match with like every guy. in other words, they're trying to maintain like 9 conversations and that's not easy to do. too many people to compete with.

    a face to face approach screams confidence and its also WAAAAAAAAY faster as opposed to the time it takes getting dates on dating sites
  • flagooner
    •
    7 years ago
    Many of these girls get sucked up to all day by losers.

    No matter how genuine and confident the guy may be, she often will attribute this type of treatment as coming from someone who is weak. They have come to appreciate and be attracted to guys who do not act as if she is up on a pedestal.

    Papi was right. When it comes to street-wise ladies, NGFL.
  • ppwh
    •
    7 years ago
    I think the other problem with the flowers and all that is that it sets up kind of an obligation thing and can come off as inauthentic. In other words, checking off the stereotypical boxes instead of interacting with her so that she actually feels it rather than intellectualizing that he has fulfilled society's expectations.

    I have heard it said in various contexts that obligation kills desire by removing the focus from the rapport and making it feel more like fulfilling a contract. Better to save the flowers for when she has had a rough time, some accomplishment, etc, instead of to express that you would like to fuck her. She should already know that.
  • GoVikings
    •
    7 years ago
    ^ well said
  • Lone_Wolf
    •
    7 years ago
    Good comments. I also found it interesting that a smoking hot baby-doll like this would need to sign up for dating site at all. I mean this honey was so fine sexy and curvaceous that she got attention where ever she went. She could have any guy she wanted.

    And yea, I realize she was probably looking for a different type of attention/dude that what was happening in her reality but, damn, no man would have a chance against her.

    I could only imagine what this young stud thought when he met her in person. Must of thought he want the sex lotto or something. Dude probably still thinks about her. I know I do.
  • ppwh
    •
    7 years ago
    > I could only imagine what this young stud thought when he met her in person.

    "Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck, how do I do this by the book and not mess it up"
  • HungryGiraffe
    •
    7 years ago
    ppwh -> "Better to save the flowers for when she has had a rough time, some accomplishment, etc, instead of to express that you would like to fuck her. She should already know that."

    Well said!
  • georgmicrodong
    •
    7 years ago
    That's not what "chivalry" means.
  • WetWilly
    •
    7 years ago
    Guys don't understand women? No one understands women.
  • stripfighter
    •
    7 years ago
    Some guys understand women more than others...

    As far as the situation, Chris Rock had a great bit about women knowing every time a guy tries to do something for her it's his way of saying "how about some dick"

    flowers, gifts, nice restaurants etc = how about some dick?
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    7 years ago
    When my older brother by 3-years was single in his early-20s, an older friend of his told him "don't get in a relationship w/ a girl you like more than she likes you" - not sure how much merit this has but perhaps there is something to it.

    I would assume it has some merit if you really like the girl for a relationship; but if one just wants to bang-her then probably doesn't matter.
  • mjx01
    •
    7 years ago
    IMO (as other have said) the guy came off as being to easy / desperate. The woman described in the OP wants a challenge / bad boy.
  • Bj99
    •
    7 years ago
    That chivalry stuff can be as fake as anything else. It's not hard to do. "nice guys" except girls to go for them bc they "want" us, and it's actually a little gross when there's no real connection. The best is when a guy is out of shape, broke, and has no game, but wants a nice sexy girl (for her looks), and thinks he deserves her bc he'd really appreciate her (which is bullshit). real nice guys do not finish last and they don't go around whining either.
  • flagooner
    •
    7 years ago
    I think bj has been drunk posting again. I had a hard time following that.

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