The discussion below by @anonymousJim started me thinking about this. We have all had less than great dances from uber hot dancers. But have you ever taken the opportunity to tell the girl why you are not getting any more dances.
I cannot think of anytime I've ever done this and would think I would have to have some kind of a connection with the girl before feeling comfortable enough to "coach" her through. And if she was a dead fish or bitchy well, then she's on her own for sure.
Yeah I have told them but unless they were complete bitches, I politely tried to tell them what they did wrong. Only once did a stripper light me up for attempting to correct her, but I just laughed at her and moved on.
I was tempted to walk during the second song of my experience. I probably should have.
I don't think you're going to change these girls. Try and they'll just go into a shell on you. They either have to want to change on their own, or be coached into changing by the club management. This particular club, I sense management really doesn't care, given the wide variety of experiences I've had.
As outlined, a woman that hot, she probably doesn't need to be a good dancer. I wouldn't anticipate her really caring enough to try and get better.
The only advice I have ever given is, "You need to suck my dick."
Once....had some bad dances from this one dancer at my regular club. Didn't say anything at the moment. Just chalked it up to a bad guess on my part. For weeks she would come by and ask me for dances and I politely declined. Finally she asked, "Why don't you get dances from me any more?" I replied that my money buys much better dances from most other dancers at the club. That's why. The dumbfounded look on her face was priceless, or at least the price of one dance.
No. I speak with my wallet. It's much more effective than mere words.
Never. Just moved on. Didn't want to deal with S.S. and the back channel conversation if it was a club that I wanted to return to.
Lol Shadow.
No I've never done that.
I don't remember ever explicitly saying so. I have done the shadowcat disdain move though. :)
If they truly suck so bad I don't see any hope for her, I don't bother saying anything. However, if I think she has a good attitude but could use some coaching, I'll tell her in so many words. Especially if she's new to stripping.
The best time to say something is when she comes back the next time. I might tell her I think she's cute, but her dances last week weren't up to the standard I look for. Or after song two of tame dances, I might be more to the point and say, "Let's stop at two now, unless this is when the [dick rubbing, fingering, French kissing, whatever] begins." I can't begin to count the number of times this type of remark has lead to a quick upgrade in mileage. (And the start of a beautiful friendship, even.)
When its called for, I've done it. Responses vary considerably, but I guess my tone varies a good bit too. Like others have said, if there's no hope sometimes I'm saying it to get the bitch to move on. If she's got a playful attitude, sometimes I'm half joking when I say it. The way I say it also depends why it sucked. If the mileage was there and the technique sucked, I'm much more likely to say it in a friendlier way and try to tell her what I'd like better. If it sucks because she's just too tame, I'll usually try and be nice but still clear that the conversation is over.
Responses are all over the road, but generally in line with what I'm looking for. Meaning, the girls I want to try and rehab usually play along & the ones I want to split usually do that too. So, I guess it has the intended effect.
No, but I have done one dance, handed her the 10 bucks I owe her and no tip and walked away.
The only "uber" dancer that I told "matter of factly" that her lap dance skills sucked - left me "gaga" the last time I saw her. She earned her "Rockie Stripper Merit Badge" for best turnaround ever! I never saw that one comimgggg!
Based on the comments of chandler and rockie, maybe it's time that I start speaking up. I never considered that the shitty dancers might improve with encouragement. I always write them off as hopeless stripperweb girls.
JS69: Generally I just won't repeat with a poor performer! My candor was not in anticipation of any improvement and I've generally never seen such improvement. With my "Merit Badge" dancer, I believe it was her competitive nature to win my wallet over from her dancing peers that changed the temperature in her dances.
I’ve been tempted to tell them their dances sucked; but have not done it – I have actually stopped a dance b/f it ends and just given her the $$$ for the dance b/c it was so bad; which is pretty much telling her her dances sucked w/o having to say it.
I have given dancers advice, although I know it’s not really my place but I do it honestly thinking it would benefit her – some advice I’ve given dancers are about approaching custies and not thinking a particular guy may not be into them – also advice/”coaching” on wearing sexier outfits (e.g. if a dancer has great tits; I advice her she should show them off as much as possible); etc.
There's so many dancers that give good dances that I just move on. I also believe that leopards don't change spots overnight. There's been a few exceptions to that rule, but no dramatic changes, just moving up to the next level kind. I wouldn't think of telling a dancer her dances sucked. I might try Chandlers approach of "I'll get some dances with you if (x),(y), (z) are going to happen."
Yeah. She cried. Never did it again.
Most of the results I've gotten were on repeated times with new strippers at my regular club. It would be pointless with a veteran, and I might not fare as well if I weren't a known regular. Even when they've said sorry, they don't do what I'd like, they've been polite about it, and I've been glad I spoke up. It helps to have some rapport and to say it with a sense of humor.
We've had a few bad dances when we first started but we sat through them. We just paid and never got a dance from them again. When they asked if we wanted to continue we pretty much can look at each other and say "No, we're good" in unison. Hate to sound this way but when we both say that with a little half smile/half grimace shaking our heads they've got to know it was bad.
Now though; if we get a really lame dance I'd just get up. Next time we're planning on getting a couple dances from several different people including the one who sat my wife on my lap and danced for her but charged us the couple rate. If she pulls that shit again I'll be off that couch in a split second letting her know I'm not paying the couple rate if she's just dancing for one of us.
I don't think I'd ever tell them they sucked or what they needed to change. Unless they specifically ask us what we'd like or if they could do this or that for us I don't think it's our job to teach them how to do a LD. Never been really asked anything yet except for the one girl who said she'd never done a couple before and flat out asked "How do you normally get couples dances?" We didn't really know what to tell her. Later on the drive home talking about it we both decided we should've just told her to take off her clothes and molest us.
Yes I told her to stop in the middle of the dance. Got up placed the money on the couch & left. Went to the manager & told him she was the worst strippe rI have ever gotn a dance from.
I've told some newbies that they could improve on some things a little. One time, there was one girl who was new and then the next time I visited, she was light years better than she was.
OTOH, I told this one girl at my favorite club she needed to have more than 2 or 3 moves and she got all pissy about how I don't like the way she dances. Even though physically she is exactly my type, she is on the short list of worst dancers I have met. I wonder what would have happened if I told her she needed a better attitude.
Yes, but silently. Well, almost silently. I said to stop, got up gave her the money and went back to the bar. I don't think I would do that in a club I didn't visit regularly. No telling what the dancer might tell a bouncer!
I generally don't tell them unless they ask why I didn't tip. One experience stands out in my mind though. There was a shot girl who was a 10. I mean, perfect body for me, perfect face, great smile, etc. I wanted to do 2 dances with her but she said she'd only do blocks of 5. I passed since in my experience there's a reason shot girls aren't dancing.
Well, eventually I broke down and told her I'd do 5. What a mistake! She didn't even get topless until I asked, she had no grind at all and wouldn't take direction from me...and no I didn't ask her to break any club rules. I stuck out all 5 but the best part was just looking at this goddess. When we were done, she asked for a tip, and that's when I told her what skills she had to work on. She was gone from the club shortly thereafter; probably found an office job that pays double based on her looks.
I was at a club in Newcastle, England and had a dance from a girl that was terrible to put it mildly. After she finished I said in an upbeat voice "I've had dances from hundreds of girls all over the world and I have to tell you..(at this point she anticipates a positive finish) ...it was by far the worst dance I have ever had, or will ever have". The way her face dropped was a picture.
I've also do what SC did, once in Rhino a girl was giving me a 'dance', she didn't allow there lightest of touches anywhere and kept putting my hands on the arms of the seat. Gave her the $20 without even looking her in the eye and blanked her the rest of the night.
Only if they ask why.
londonguy: That first post of yours was ... cold.
Clubber's point about a dancer potentially taking revenge via bouncer ("Hey, that guy took out his thing and tried to finger my butt!") is why I think it's best to just not say anything. But yeah. No lingering and no tip. You can make your statement pretty easily that way.
AJ,
That would only concern me in a club where they don't know me. My favorite club, I could likely get by with anything. :)
@ Clubber: I agree! I've only had one confrontation with a bouncer. A girl I was chatting up turned crazy and started screaming at me. I have no clue why, but she must have thought I said something I didn't seeing as it's a loud club.
Well, as she's screaming a bouncer comes over, takes me aside and asks what happened. I related the conversation verbatim. He walks over to the dancer and talks to her and she goes to the dressing room. The bouncer comes back, apologizes for her insanity and buys me a drink!
The bouncer has been there 10 years at least and me longer than that, so the fact he knows I'm a regular and never creates a problem surely helped. I've seen customers get far worse when maybe there was another side to it. Some of these girls can be....difficult and yes, they do lie.
Within the past year I violated my test drive rule and took a beautiful dancer straight to the champagne room. Looked great, felt great, was as sexual as wet cardboard. After 7 minutes I asked her to get up and began putting my stuff in the pockets. She asked whats wrong and I said I am not enjoying this so I am done. She said no refunds so I was honest and said I consider half for the dance and the other half for you to just stop, so we're even. The look on her beautiful face was hysterical...like she had never been rejected before.
rock,
So far, knock on wood, I've never had a bouncer run in. Closes I came was in Atlanta a couple of years ago. I think I told sc this story. I went to the Mardi Gras hoping to hook up with a dancer (Chrystal??) he knows/knew.
Anyway, what I didn't say in the review was the conversation between Miss smoke free and myself. Got a tad heated since I felt entirely OK with the cigar since smoking was approved. Anyway, after I had a conversation with the bouncer (no problem whatsoever) I was the nice guy and sat elsewhere. I wonder if the waitress I had mentioned the $100 tip I gave her and asked her to mention it to Miss smoke free. The bouncer was quite pleasant.
All sc's fault!!!
YES! I prepaid for 2 dances. This dumb broad was doing circuis tricks and handstands, no grinding whatsoever. She starts reaching into my pockets, I think for something to hold on for one of her circuis tricks. I pushed her off me and stood up and started putting my stuff back in my pockets, she says "something wrong?" "Your dance sucks." "Excuse me?" (louder this time)"your dance sucked." She then proceeds to yell "asshole" as I'm leaving.
Yes, a very long time ago I tried (politely) to tell a dancer that switching from air dance to jackhammer on my crotch at random times was not interesting nor appreciated. It did NOT go over well!!!!!!!
She called me a pervert, then got the "bouncer" (VIP room attendant) and tried to get me thrown out. Fortunately, the guy had been watching us from the door - laughing at the punishment she was applying to my crotch - so I got a "chewing out" from him and after she left he pointed out that she forgot to ask for money so I had the funds to get a real lap dance, then he recommended a dancer that was not on a mission to murder balls.
Have not gone that far yet, but recently I stopped a dancer after just one dance at a $10/floor-dance club where I had been getting multiple dances from multiple dancers, her dance was very very light-contact & she even kept her outfit on whereas as the other dancers had gotten butt-naked & given me VHM & UHM dances - I think she was a newb, after I stopped her after one dance she asked me if I enjoyed my dance & I just shook my head no.
No, I just do one and done's, unless it was any type of ROB. I feel it's just not worth the drama to insult or correct them.
No, but I think they get the message if I only buy one dance from them, call it quits, and then proceed to spend hundreds on another dancer right after that. No reason to be rude to their face. They'll figure it out in a more subtle way.
One newbie dancer was having a hard time getting dances. She was more than willing to take advice and implement it. She quickly became my go to dancer until she introduced me to my ATF. I still get dances from her on occasion.
I don't remember ever telling them that the dances suck. like most, I'll stop the dances, pay them their money and go back to the main room. I think I should have told a few, but I don't want to start a problem.
Nope, I just hit them with the one and done.
I don't use that word because I don't like to associated the word suck with a negative. Sucking is a good thing. I have told many I did not enjoy a dance or specific action.
really good thread.
i haven't ever told a dancer her dances sucked. however, one girl could tell based on my body language. i did a ten minute VIP room with one of the prettiest strippers i've ever seen. this girl was exactly my type and she even sat with me for a while before we did our dances because the club was dead that night. we get to the VIP room and she reluctantly lets me grab her breasts but she wasn't all that comfortable with it. and she also didn't grind that well and seemed totally uninspired. this really surprised me because she was cool while sitting with me and i would have never guessed her dances would be THAT bad--but they were.
and i didn't sense that she was a new stripper--i got the feeling that she just didn't care and figured she could get away with it. what made things even worse is that this was a pre-pay club and i spent 80 bucks on 10 minutes of awful dances from a beauty
with all that said, this situation was an anomaly. i've had a small handful of bad dances, but most strippers have given me good to great dances
I remember doing a 2 for 1 lap dance that was so terrible that half way through the first song, I got up, tossed the $20 on the couch, and walked out of the room. Silent but I think she got the message.