Why no regular hospitality?

Try telling her she has nice elbows, works for me.

Go in during the day when it's slower. A busy club at night is no time for a dancer to chat.

Dude im a 396 pound 6'0".....white dude with a Amish looking beard and I dress either like a gangsta, priest, hobo, gym rat and a redneck.....I drop $1,000s of rollers and get a lot of conversation and da sex.......try more money bro

I'm not a regular at my closest club either but I do manage some of the extended conversations that you're missing our on. It could be bc I'm ridiculously good looking, or because I go during lunch at a more blue collar club in the south. In 2 visits I know the ages of my favorites kids and have seen pics of the happy family (minus the father of course). Hell I even got her to ask special permission to change back into her street clothes to go have a 30 minutes cigar with me outside. Chatted about life the whole time.

Sometimes you have to go on the offense to get what you want to establish that relationship, but worth it in my opinion.

Estafador, this is really another variation of your previous complaint about a lack of attention in your clubs. I have two words for you: club selection.

For the most part, you favor high hustle tourist traps. Now don't get me wrong, a high roller will likely get some face time as a dancer tries to figure out how best to fleece him, but most of us regular folk generally get little more that "wanna dance" in those places.

You might find things a bit better during the dayshift at G2000 or Scandals (Long Island City). You might also want to consider a night visit to JR in the Bronx, which is full nude with no alcohol (since you don't drink anyway) and is reportedly a little slower paced.

Or you can keep going to Manhattan tourist traps and continue to complain about being treated as a second class citizen.

I agree with rick.....its a very good point

Juice!Lay off Jenny Stripper hook up with Jenny Craig.

"Go in during the day when it's slower. A busy club at night is no time for a dancer to chat"

This is TRUE!

And - Location, Location, Location like rickdugan says.

And perhaps you are unconscienciously giving off the wrong vibe Estafodor. Being a bit older and more experienced might help too.

You mention a couple of things...

Not holding a drink. I don't drink much either. And for some reason that does seem to work against me.

Sitting alone. Yep heard that too.

"mean looking". Get that too.

For all those reasons, I tend to stick with my known ATFs as much as possible.

And I'm white and older. So I'm not sure if young & black matter that much

I assumed young and black because, let's face it, many white people are a little fearful of a big black man. Not totally, but they can be reproachful of just waltzing to a big black guy due to stereotypes (I neither agree nor deny some of them). And young, fromall the talk from you guys, it seems that strippers look at the young guy as the kid with only a hundred and not a big roller like the older gentlemen. At least that's what I've learned through you all. I stopped the tourist traps and have been doing more late afternoon to early nights in queens. Haven't done the bronx yet, but that's a work in progress. Still on the slow days, never really had much convo. Don't worry rick ol' boy, I've learned to heed manhattan, I've learned.

Estafador:

You don't get any attention because its a sociological issue.

People tend to have conversations if they feel time is not crucial, communication is necessary,and they find the other person is a match. In other words, do you fit together?

You are mistaking the discussions of having long conversations here as the norm, it is not. Unless I have met the dancer before and she likes me, I get the same treatment.

Actually I heard numerous times from dancers about how young black (2 strikes against you) guys are the worst to deal with, they never spend money, and expect way too much, so there might be some of that, maybe she feels as she's wasting her time, yeah it's racist generalizing bullshit but that's the reality of our lives.

& there's probably some true to that, so why would she fish for exceptions.

Being young and black is an almost guaranteed way to not get enough attention. Why? Many dancers usually assume that young black dudes (as opposed to the older back dudes, a very good spending demographic group IMHO) are cheap, and I don't blame them for believing that. A lot of you guys are very cheap or like to hit on the dancers telling them "if I was your man, I would not let you do this/I'd pamper you/I'd provide for you" more than any other ethnicity and this had created a prejudice among younger black men.

I used to get that alot where girls approached said Hi whats your name and want to dance, I politely say no maybe later and hope some gorl comes up that wants a drink or meaninfful conversation. I think the rush is to try Me out and later decide if a second go is in order

I get some of the same but in reverse. My recently former ATF moved to a club that was majority black but not thuggish. I am very white, 6 ft 200 lbs and dress very nice. For some reason the people in the club stay out of my way, even apologize if they block my view. I find it amusing. I mostly get approached by the hottest of the black dancers but I'm after a freaky white dancer. She will dance for me but otherwise pays me little attention. I think she knows it drives me nuts. Im used to getting all the attention I want. Little does she know I'm about to move on in search of a new ATF.

Seriously- try a daytime visit and report back.

I think that a lot of it has to be related to how busy the club is. If it is crawling with customers, this is the time for the dancers to make the big bucks. During slower times, this is when they can relax a bit and cultivate customers for regulars. And of course the day shift is usually much slower.

I usually run into the complete opposite experience- dancers who plop down at my table and want to yap for hours. I have been clam-jammed more times than I can count. I learned a long time ago that it was something that I just have to accept. Sometimes the only escape is a run to the ladies room to wait it out until she finally gets up and leaves.

The grass isn't always greener.....

@eatafador: I think the actual incidence of the "just chatting" encounter is considerably smaller than what is implied by the number of times it come up here. Most of the time when it's happened to me it's been because of one of two reasons:

1. The place is slow, and she has nothing else to do anyway.
2. She knows I'm gonna spend money at some point, so doesn't have any problem "investing" a little time.

The times when it's due to me being a super nice guy with sparkling conversational skills are, while not completely absent, are few and far between. I'm guessing its probably the same for many, though not all, others here, and that the incidence of reporting such is vastly out of proportion to how often it actually occurs.

"2. She knows I'm gonna spend money at some point, so doesn't have any problem "investing" a little time"

This may well be Estafador's issue or part of it. The dancers may look at him and make an internal judgment that he is NOT a $$$ spender.

I agree some clubs are all about the hustle. The evening dancers have alot more tip out and are about making money. The milfs in the afternoon or early evening usually are more about looking for a regular that will come back to see her. During the week is better for a relaxed atmosphere.

Offer to buy her a drink. They will usually sit and chat for the duration of the drink and usually longer.

@lopaw: "clam-jammed"... damn I'm going to have to remember that one LOL

I hope they are not looking at Me as another pretty boy with no money-lol Damn I miss the old days.Wine,Women and Wallet

Try clubs in Queens Bro. Long Island City Woodside College Point Jamaica

Estafador, I'm in your neck of the woods and can relate to your experience. Relatively new to this game myself. But, I agree with Rick and JayJay. Not a color thing, it's a strategy thing. I've found that some of the dancers in the NYC area use the "wanna dance" approach because their English language skills are poor.

Try this, which is working for me:

1. To JayJay's point, arm yourself with $200 minimum, preferably $300-$400, for a club outing.
2. To Rick's point, roll into Gallaghers 2000 sometime between 11:30am and 3:30pm, when they offer a free lunch and discount price drinks.
3. Sit at the bar and be prepared for a $20 per hour topless dollar parade. If you see someone you like, ask her to stop by.
4. Order a drink and free lunch.
5. When someone approaches of interest, offer to buy her a drink and ask her to join you for lunch. If you go to the club after 3:30pm, just order a drink and offer a dancer of interest a drink and chat her up. Just say no when you get the "wanna dance" approach. Many of the ladies here enjoy taking the time to chat with patrons. I spent four hours at G2000 on first visit and had a blast with four dancers, each session preceded by lengthy chat and frolicking at the bar. BTW, this is a relatively high mileage club.
6. Go upstairs to LD area with the first dancer, but limit the session to 2-3 songs. Then head back to the bar for the next dancer.
7. Repeat steps 5 & 6, until you run out of cash. You will find that the dancers here watch who is spending money, because they can see who is walking up and down the stairs to the LD area. Do this a few times and there will be a line of dancers waiting to chat with you and dance for you.

For more details, see my G2000 reviews. Enjoy!!

Esta,

Everything mentioned has it's effect. For me, if I wish a dancer to hang around, she does. Why? A difficult question to answer. Works for me no mater which persona (working guy or biker)I am in, so I have to figure it's me.

Maybe the older guy has more money? No biker, yes working guy.

A "social outcast"? Yes biker, no working guy.

Maybe you can pick up some lessons when April 20th comes around. :)

I was a regular in one club and one dancer would act like my drink buddy even if the club got busy. She would sit with me for over two hours at a time often times even inviting other dancers over. I only bought drinks for her. She only got ordinary less expensive beer. I would occasionally buy a ten dollar table dance. I sometimes had to think of a way to politely try to cut her off if I wanted dances from other dancers or stop spending money on her drinks. This was mainly in one club that had a number of slow nights. It paid to be friendly with regulars especially on those slow nights.

The biggest surprise I got in that club as far as conversation was when one dancer whom I liked said something about just sitting and talking with me the whole rest of the night. It was only 9:30sh pm. We were the same age. I didn't realize it but she wanted to go out with me. It kind of confused me at first but I wasn't going to complain about a pretty dancer spending all her time with me. The last half hour I did say something about wanting to get dances from other dancers so I got other dances and she danced for a few other people before the club closed. On one of the following weekends, a group of guys thought I was her boyfriend. That's the extreme for me. She was even buying her own drinks and I didn't even realize that was extreme for a dancer. She did tell me she had to do one ten table dance every hour or she would get in trouble with the management. At some other clubs, the most I ever talked is probably 30 to 60 minutes. Some dancers like talking.

Try Riviera and Scandals or Gold Fingers Infinity all in Astoria/L.I.C

Djs, I've previously recommended Goldfinger Infinity as an evening option and Scandals as a daytime option, but in this particular thread Estafador has expressed an interest in some talk time with the ladies. All of those clubs are high hustle and not really geared towards a lot of talk. Heck, in Scandals and Riviera it is almost impossible to have a conversation simply due to how high they jam the music volume.

. I know after a certain time it gets crowded but NY clubs are More Hustle too. I can introduce Him to girls at those clubs but on His own I think its Brooklyn clubs I hear.If He took a couch handed drinks they listen. Just My advice

BTW Rick Your suggestion of Scandals is good for younger dudes I've seen first hand maybe because there are also younger aged strippers early 20's amongst many.

First of all, there is the suggestion of the Day Shift try also to chat up other people...the doorman, the bartender, the waitress, etc. Dancer's will pick up on that.

"Clam-jammed", lopaw? Did you coin that phrase?

Es, I enjoy spending time talking with hot strippers before going to VIP. When a dancer I'm interested in stops by, I ask her to sit down and I buy her a drink or two. She will engage in conversation for at least as long as it takes her to finish her drink, and she knows I'm interested in her, so the conversation time is not a waste.

lopaw,

Every time I've tried your "escape" plan, I end up kicked out of the club!

Too bad I'm not talking about NY clubs guys. Mostly was talking about gallaghers but NY in general. But holy crap, I did not know gallaghers was open so damn early. 11:30am, really bro?

@jayjay Well that's actually pretty horrible. That sort of cynicalism would probably kill strip clubs in future generations if that sort of thinking widespread. But I am assuming. For me personally though, if the girl I was hitting on was a stripper, as long as she makes her money her way, I don't give a fuck how its done (as long as she isn't doing drugs lol). But yeah if that's the case, looks like I gotta step my game up to show us yyoung black guys got more dough than you think (suprising the drug dealer youngster isn't. Loose with his money).

Sounds like its more location overall. I'll also give scandels a try and see where that takes me.

Maybe this was true for Me at many a time but maybe you should see if this was the case. They ask you for a dance right off the bat to feel you out. How you act/react upon a dance.How you phyiscally feel so afterwards they can ask you for a drink and start conversation leading to more or even a date. If this isn't the case then try new clubs

I rarely go to a club without spending some time chatting with strippers, even when it's busy. There have been times when I've spent the entire evening just talking with one or two strippers without getting any dances. Sometimes when it's slow, sometimes when it's standing room only on a Saturday night.

I listen to them and what they're saying, and I really pay attention to them. That's all that I do.

But, not every stripper wants to talk. Part of it is investing the time in finding the strippers at the club you're at who want to hang out and talk instead of hustling. They're people, just like you and I are. Treat them with respect and you'll be amazed at the results. I've been called and asked to come in and hang out with a stripper before so that she could chat with me instead of doing private rooms with other customers. I hung out with her for a couple of hours chatting and then left.