Passive vs Agressive

avatar for Monte8
Monte8
My strategy in strip clubs is to let the dancers approach me. Main reason is that it puts you at an advantage.
Anyone think that being the aggressor (i e chasing the one you want)is a better way to go?

Someting Ive noticed is eye contact is all you need to get them to approach or lack thereoff tells them you or not interested.

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avatar for goodsouthernboy
goodsouthernboy
12 years ago
I'm big on the eye contact that you're talking about. If a chick isn't my type starts approaching me, I'll quickly look away and that usually sends them in another direction. I'm too big of a softy/nice guy to be rude outright so I will avoid saying no until I absolutely have to.

A quick wink at the girl I'm interested in will generally get her attention and bring her my way.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
12 years ago
I have found that being agressive puts you at a disadvantage as far as pricing goes. If you chase after her, she knows she has you hooked and can probably demand top price. Of course there are times when the one you want is being elusive and you have to go afer her and pay the price.
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
12 years ago
If it were that simple we wouldn't need forums like this. Lots of times eye contact and body language isn't enough. I know others might disagree but I've had my best dances after I've done the approaching.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
I prefer being approached and I really enjoy when they flirt w/ me.

I also like being approached b/c I believe if I have to be the one to approach her, then she may not be that interested in giving me a LD in the 1st place and the LD might suck. I do approach sometimes when I really really want LDs, but often times I am content to go home with my $$$ if I am not approached.

But I must say that I have personally not seen a significant or consistent difference w.r.t. the quality of the LD and whether I approached her or she approached me.

I agree w/ others in that a look or a stare is usually enough to get the dancer to come over to you. But I’ve found that in certain clubs, although usually not the norm, for some reason girls often do not do much approaching even though if you approach them they are usually willing and do give you good LDs.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
P.S.

In the passive clubs I mentioned in my previous post, I’ll say that if one is not proactive then there is a good chance the only action you will get that night is from your right hand.
avatar for Corvus
Corvus
12 years ago
One time to be aggressive is around shift change. You run the risk of waiting around long enough to watch her walk out the door in her street clothes.

Most of the time I don't have to approach dancers but I will if I feel it is necessary to meet one I'm interested in. Just last month I followed a goddess to her table and spent the whole evening with her. It was a great night. And while she would have found me on her own I saw no reason to delay the inevitable.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
12 years ago
Life is too fucking short to wait around cooling my heels hoping a stripper I've got the hots for to approach me. And if being the aggressor puts me at a disadvantage with regard to pricing, I should give up, go home and watch porn, 'cause I'm playing the wrong game.

Yeah, there are times to sit back and watch, but I'm not going to forgo a good time because she's busy, or doesn't notice me.
avatar for mjx01
mjx01
12 years ago
I mostly agree with shadowcat. However, there are 'no hustle' clubs were you have to approach the girl.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
If I see a dancer I really want I'll approach her, instead of sitting there twiddling my thumbs and complaining about NOT being approached. This has NEVER IMO put me in a bad situation regarding pricing. Life is indeed to short to just sit there.
avatar for staxwell
staxwell
12 years ago
What gmd and sclvr said.
avatar for HungryGiraffe
HungryGiraffe
12 years ago
What GMD saiid!
avatar for xxxrated
xxxrated
12 years ago
Well,its just business transaction anyway. What happens to me is that strippers that approach me are the ones i have no interest for. The ones that peek my interest are always busy with other customers. So for me i chase them down ,that way i leave the club satisfied.
avatar for farmerart
farmerart
12 years ago
I didn't build my wealth by being passive in business and I sure as hell am not passive in a SC if I see a girl that I like.

On the rare occasion I will even approach a dancer sitting at a table chatting with other guys.

One evening I entered a club in Vancouver barely an hour before closing. I spent 5 min scoping out the room to find any dancer that I might find attractive. My prey was sitting at a table of young jocks chatting and watching the jocks drink beer.

I went over to her, stuck a $20 bill in her cleavage, told her I was good for lap dances until closing time. She jumped up so quickly that she almost knocked over the table of beer. The young jocks glared at me but didn't say a word as the girl took my hand and led me upstairs to the lap dance area.

Also scored a tasty piece of takeout crumpet when the club closed.

I think you guys who wait for a dancer to acknowledge your existence are just totally nuts!
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"I think you guys who wait for a dancer to acknowledge your existence are just totally nuts!"

Hmm...!! :)) ;))
avatar for Monte8
Monte8
12 years ago
Personally Ive had the awsome lap dances after being approached, but Im not going to criticize someone doing it a different way. If it works for you, more power to you.



avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
12 years ago
I'm not usually in a hurry to get a lap dance. I have time to sit around and look at the girls on stage and take in the view. I've been saving money by spending less on lap dances. I've had several dancers I'm interested in come over and sit on my lap or drink with me and chat before discussing dances. I do approach dancers when I like them when they get up on stage. I'm not usually thinking, oh I need to get a lap dance from her or her. Lap dances start to blur after a while. They all seem similar after a while if they are all good. I rarely go after dancers but I get up and tip whomever I want to all the time. Drinking a little beer gives me extra energy and I do not like sitting still if I have too much energy.

I am not aware of a club I have visited lately where dancers don't approach you. If anything, I might consider dodging certain dancers if I don't want them tying me up blocking other dancers. Most dancers do leave if you say you're ok when they ask to sit.

I find it nice to be able to visit a club and not be mobbed by dancer after dancer asking for dances seconds apart. Looking away from dancers helps out a lot, sometimes. If a club has a lot of regular dancers working, that really helps stop a lot of the wanna dance questions. If you just say no all the time, they won't ask as much. If I get asked by 10 or more dancers in less than ten minutes when I first sit down in a club, I will look for another spot to sit at. Unless, I don't mind the mob, lol.
avatar for boogieknight369
boogieknight369
12 years ago
Always had more fun when I was approached and the chick was aggressive.
avatar for Monte8
Monte8
12 years ago
Shark, your experience is very similar to mine. I would rather get a couple of standout dances than 10 that all seem to blur together.

And ditto to Boogie's response, the agrressive ones most often can make your night.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
12 years ago
I'd say that about 30% of my dances are me doing the approaching, and I don't recall ever getting a bad dance because of it. Like most I prefer to be approached, but if necessary I'll hunt down an elusive dancer if I have to.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
12 years ago
I've never made a move on a dancer. I do use eye contact and only once has it failed.
avatar for Dougster
Dougster
12 years ago
Where's the jestie-girl? Perhaps he could chime in on what the passive-aggressive approach here would be?
avatar for rogertex
rogertex
12 years ago
Gentlemen.

You can enjoy both!

I get aggressive weekends/nights when there's a smokin dancer and lotsa guys.

Rest of the time I enjoy being seduced - an experience uniquely found only in strip clubs. Make a waitress your wing girl to minimize the wait. Waitresses do the "hooking up" part of their job with a mission.
avatar for Dain
Dain
12 years ago
90% of my "dances" are after the chic approaches ME. My strategy: rub my cock so that she can see it while she's on stage. About 90% of the girls will then approach me. If I'm not ready yet, I say: "I'm not ready yet to bring my evening to a climax." Later on, when I AM ready, I go get the one I want that night/day. I always get a happy ending.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
12 years ago
What xxxrated said is usually what happens to me. Most of the time the strippers who I want to approach me never do.

I'd much rather be approached but many times I end up having to be the aggressor.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
12 years ago
In some clubs, you have to be the aggressor and if you're not, you won't get anything. I generally hate those clubs because often times, it seems like they spend more time away from the floor than on it, and it's not like they are selling dances, either. I mostly prefer to wait for them to come to me.
avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
12 years ago
C'mon guys,it's like trout fishing,tease the top water.You fucks read way more into it than need be.
avatar for jester214
jester214
12 years ago
There's a time and place for everything. Sometimes you can sit back sometimes you have to go get it.

The majority of the time though you should be able to attract any of them with lots of eye contact or a stage tip.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
“… I even have a rule that if she asks some other guy first, I wouldn't give her a nickel …”

That is a little extreme but we all have our preferences.

But in a similar fashion, I will often turn down a dancer that has passed me up, literally walked by me maybe more than once, looked at me, and kept going, and then decides two hours later to ask me if I want a dance.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"What Che wrote.

I even have a rule that if she asks some other guy first, I wouldn't give her a nickel.

I'm not going to be a stripper's second choice or option.

Either ask right away, or get fucked."

What an attitude! You think you're ENTITLED to a dancer's time and effort cflock?? You may want to think AGAIN!
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
12 years ago
My favorite was once in a fairly empty club a dancer started on the far end of the club methodically asking every guy for a dance and was turned down each time. She must have asked 10 or 12 guys in succession when she eventually came to my table. She stopped, turned around w/o asking me, and went to the bar, where she sat texting on her cellphone. I have no idea why she walked away....maybe I reminded her of her deadbeat baby daddy or something. When she was called to the stage I made it a point to go up to the rail and stand there long enough to get her attention. When I knew that she was looking a took several bills from my wallet, bent down to toss them on the stage, then slowly returned them to my wallet and sat back down, smiling the whole time. It was worth it to see the look on her face.
avatar for 623
623
12 years ago
Some places have house rules, like OG in Vegas, if a guy is sitting at the stage he must be left alone. Sit at the wrong place and you might sit alone all night.

I'd rather have the one I want than settle for the one that's not too busy but I'm glad for all of those who are too lazy or scared to make a move. I prefer to be the one doing the choosing.
avatar for Corvus
Corvus
12 years ago
@sclvr5005 -- Sweet. Way to make an impression on that girl. I'll remember that move in case I have a chance to use it.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"My favorite was once in a fairly empty club a dancer started on the far end of the club methodically asking every guy for a dance and was turned down each time. She must have asked 10 or 12 guys in succession when she eventually came to my table. She stopped, turned around w/o asking me, and went to the bar, where she sat texting on her cellphone. I have no idea why she walked away....maybe I reminded her of her deadbeat baby daddy or something. When she was called to the stage I made it a point to go up to the rail and stand there long enough to get her attention. When I knew that she was looking a took several bills from my wallet, bent down to toss them on the stage, then slowly returned them to my wallet and sat back down, smiling the whole time. It was worth it to see the look on her face."

And your point for rubbing her nose in it?
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
12 years ago
my point was that she made it very obvious that she wasn't going to approach me, and I answered that by making it very obvious that I wasn't going to tip her.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
12 years ago
I never approach a dancer. Either she is hungry enough to seek out my spending or she is not. And I don't give a shit about the relative quality of dances provided by girls who are approached vs. those who do the asking - I am talking about hungry enough that she would be tempted into other activities. In my experience, girls who must be chased after make horrible OTC candidates.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
12 years ago
I guess I'm a lot less fussy than some people in strip clubs. However I still say no to probably over 90 percent of the dancers who ask for dances.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
"my point was that she made it very obvious that she wasn't going to approach me, and I answered that by making it very obvious that I wasn't going to tip her."

Could you have made your point less rudely perhaps Sir?
avatar for minnow
minnow
12 years ago
Gentlemen (at least ONE poster has dignity and standards, lol), and lopaw:
One law of nature that manifests itself is that the dancers that are most motivated to approach you are the ones you're least motivated to spend $$ and time with, while the ones you'd be most "motivated" to spend on approach every other customer but you first.

If I see someone grab a chair, and station themselves right outside dressing room or ladies room, I'll know its cflock. Thanks for the entertainment, all............
avatar for Dougster
Dougster
12 years ago
So much non-sense in this thread by certain people with dumb rules and egos. Some of the best dances I've had have been from girls I had to approach. With OTC I agree generally the ones who approach you will be the most likely, but it's not a hard and fast rule. If I was dogmatic or had my ego hurt I would have missed out on some great OTC by not approaching. Including one of my three favorites of all time. So just don't over generalize or let your pride get in the way you'll be fine.
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
12 years ago
" Could you have made your point less rudely perhaps Sir?"

Perhaps. But why? We've all had dancers walk right past us and not hit us up for whatever reason that pops into their tiny little brains. Fine. Whatever. But this bitch made it so obvious that apparently I wasn't worthy of her attention that I wanted to give her a little payback and make her aware that I didn't appreciate her rudeness. An eye for an eye.
avatar for Clackport
Clackport
12 years ago
Generally I prefer the dancers to approach me, but I'll approach a dancer I like if she doesn't come my way.
avatar for minnow
minnow
12 years ago
"Looks like you are into that, not that I judge you."

If that isn't judgemental, then I don't know what is. You also didn't get my post. Since you are so anal about being the dancers "first one", right outside dressing room (or any other high traffic area), then stationing yourself thusly should guarantee that she'll at least encounter you first. On second thought, if your lack of humor vibes I've picked up from your posts are on display there, she'd probably walk right by you anyway.
Fyi, I'm not into sitting by restrooms, or dark corners. I generally have no problem getting a good stage or floorside seat,so I'll pass on your offer.
avatar for Estafador
Estafador
12 years ago
I don't care what alucard has said in the past (or present), chasing doesn't always work. Half the time, when they're not looking around for patrons, they're busying themselves with friends, phones bouncers or just gone. And when you interrupt them, either they make you wait (I.e. don't come back) or they give you shit dances. I been forewarned by some og pls of the clubs I've been to about this so unless they're not doing shit, I prefer they come to me. I work enough at the job anyway, I just wanna relax.
avatar for minnow
minnow
12 years ago
cf- Your lack of reading comprehension, intelligence, and humor continue to amaze me. Where in any of my 2 posts do I say that I favor sitting in a high traffic areas as my own personal strategy ? Put another way- if I suggest that someone take up bungee jumping, does that mean that I enjoy bungee jumping as a hobby ?

I guess that I shouldn't expect too much from someone who makes a repetitive visit to a club that he thinks sucks and is a waste of time while apparently ignoring several other clubs in the area. Quite frankly, your reviews and posting history don't exude a very bright outlook on life and others. Continue to enjoy your darkness and seclusion, sir.
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