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Have you ever said "I love you" to your ATF or dancer?

Avatar for nengneng
nengneng

I mean, not the casual talks like "I love you; baby I love you, too", but quite seriously and sincerely, during lap dance, holding her tightly, face to face, watching into each others' eyes.

Sometimes I do this. I am not sure how serious I am about what I say, but I just cannot help when holding a gorgeous girl whose face and body fulfill all my fantasy about female.

I just wonder, is this a common thing (say "I love you") that some of you also do occasionally, or not.

BTW, I told my ATF the joke I picked up here (this one: Why women have breasts? Because men suck.) and her response was almost nothing as if she did not get the joke (actually she did). Why I find it very funny but she doesn't? I try to flirt using some jokes I pick up here (since English is not my mother language, it's hard for me to make my own joke), but maybe the jokes here only appeal to we males???

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

No. I like many of them, and like all of the ones I've had sex with, sometimes a lot, but love is not on the table. Got that with my wife.

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Avatar for lopaw
lopaw

I'm sure they hear it all the time and probably don't even care, but saying "I love you" to a dancer is a sure fire way to freak her out and make her think that you are probably a stalker in the making. I wouldn't recommend it.

The only "I love" that comes out of my mouth to a stripper is "I love your (insert female body part here)".

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Avatar for looneylarry
looneylarry

Whew, I'd stay away from blurting that out all the time. You don't love them and they don't love you, and they know that and you should know that. Regarding your joke telling: it could be your delivery.

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Avatar for nengneng
nengneng

I see. Since you have your SO, you draw a clear boundary between "like" zone and "love" zone.

I think for singles (like me), such boundary blurs.

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Avatar for Dougster
Dougster

OP: "Have you ever said 'I love you' to your ATF or dancer?"

Sure. Many time to many dancers.

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Avatar for nengneng
nengneng

@Dougster: finally I see another guy also does this, which makes me feel that saying this is not too rare and strange.

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

lopaw's right. Love their attributes, love what they do, love how they make you feel, but save the real love for someone who will return it for real, and not for money.

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Avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude

First, there is no sincerity of feelings or emotions with dancers. They fake anything in order to make money. Professions of love from a dancer are phony and from a customer downright scary as Lowpaw has correctly advised.

Some jokes test cultural awareness, intelligence or just the hearer's sense of humor. That's why some folks just don't get it.

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Avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter

I don't recall saying that when it wasn't forced or very casual conversation. My first very young ATF prodded me into saying that word sometimes.

One dancer I met told me not to use the word sex but love. You don't ask a girl to have sex but to make love. I started thinking the proper translation when you say to a girl "I love you" means "we're going to have sex". I thought some guys say that all the time not meaning one word of it and then the girl has sex in some cases believing the guy is going to stay with her. Know any single mothers that are stripping where the boyfriend left after she got pregnant? Happens all the time.

I like a lot of people but I'm not too emotionally attached too most. So my answer is No. I don't recall ever looking into a dancers face and mean it with the love word. One dancer said that to me and started crying when I said I was moving. I was not in love. If she was serious I found it amazing she could bond to me like that without us ever going all the way. Now if talk about loving a dancer one minute and hating her the next, I know what that feels like.

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Avatar for sayeh443
sayeh443

nengneng....you are such a loser. i really feel sorry for you.

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Avatar for mmdv26
mmdv26

I usually dated a girl for a while before I told her I loved her, even if we were already f***ing. I think the same would be true for a stripper in that I would need to be at some level of a relationship before I would become that emotionally vulnerable by telling her that I loved her.

Strippers are very hard to love because most of them don't have a clue what a relationship looks like - it's more than a place to crash, wheels and access to chemicals.

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Avatar for Pablo Antonio
Pablo Antonio

Nengneng: Dancers are people too. They love and want to be loved. But they are in a Sexually Oriented Business. They either have sex with clients or they make you feel like you could have sex. This is what we pay for, their company.

Get a grip man, this is a fantasy world and nothing is real here except the physical. Thoughts, words, and feelings don't exist. They are like a ghost, we believe they are there, but they are not.

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Avatar for jackoff
jackoff

A reason not to!

I had a OTC girl that I saw 2-3 times a week for a long time. We threw around the love word all the time. I love fucking you, I love spending time with you, I love kissing you etc... One night I get a phone call and it's my girl (intoxicated) calling to tell me she was IN LOVE with me and no longer wanted to see me for $$ and hadn't for a long time, blah, blah, blah. I blew it off as a drunk talking crazy. Well we met the next day and sober she tells me the same thing. I told her that although I loved being with her and doing all the things we did together I was not in Love. It got to the point that I had to explain to her that I really didn't pay her to be with me, but that I paid her to leave me alone when I was done with her. I've had divorces that ended better than this did. The lesson I learned be careful using that word with any woman. There interpretation may be different than yours. Although telling a stripper in the club might be a little different than OTC. I just know I will never ever use it again even to tell them that I love them sucking my dick! Love in a strippers world has always meant $$$ to me, which is fine. If they throw the IN word in front of it RUN LIKE HELL!

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Avatar for jackslash
jackslash

nengneng, concerning jokes, I've found that most women don't have much of a sense of humor, and they usually don't like men's sexually oriented jokes. I don't know why.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?

A: You can only get three fingers into a bowling ball.

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Avatar for nengneng
nengneng

@pabloantonio: thanks for the "disillusion". I think that may be due to my "take" from going to strip club is a little different. I expect not only visual and physical fantasy, but also some emotional fantasy making me feel as if I have such a (physically) gorgeous girl friend, and I know more likely it is JUST fantasy, and saying "I love you" is part of my fantasy here.

However, I do need to understand that since it is fantasy, I should not be into it too much, and it's done when the session is done.

Thanks for your points, which are very explanatory!

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Avatar for nengneng
nengneng

@jackslash: I have feeling that they just don't like men's sexually oriented jokes, not too much because of lack of sense of humor. Seems like the same case for women in civilian life.

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Avatar for Dougster
Dougster

jackslash: I've heard a similar joke.

Q: How are strippers like bowling balls?

A: You pick them, put your fingers in them, throw them in the gutter, and they come back to you!

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Avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels

I wouldn't waste the air.

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Avatar for Clubber
Clubber

I had this discussion with my ATF. I believe there are different levels/kinds of love. I loved my parents and most of my relatives, SO, in-laws, etc. MY SO is at a different level, than say a cousin. So, when talking with my ATF, we agree that we truly do love each other, but it was not a SO type of love, rather at a father/daughter level.

Right now, with "C", my current favorite, there is this relationship blooming. Will it end in love, maybe, but one never knows. vm will likely think I am nuts, and he probably is correct!

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Avatar for TommyMoney
TommyMoney

Some good ol' honest pithiness, nengneng:

You, like most people, really don't have a clue about what constitutes True Love (romantic). If that's your desire -- as it appears to be from reading your posts -- then you need to redirect all your time, energy and resources away from strip clubs, and into endeavors that can actually lead you to that Promised Land.

Good luck in any course you take...

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Avatar for Realist123
Realist123

No

more of, I love your tits, i love the way you grab my cock. Save the lovey dovey stuff for someone who you don't pay

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Avatar for skeets35
skeets35

I love you? Never, but if it got me laid, why not?

Love and dancers is not much of a mix. It is like when they reach down to see how big your package is then after a few seconds you realize it is your wallet they are rubbing, not your cock.

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Avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan

wow...just, wow. No, no, no. Wow. No.

I was a bit surprised by the answers, but my response may be a bit biaed given my particular game.

Imagine this scene: She goes with me to my hotel thinking that I am a normal, married guy just looking to get a little strange. She thinks this will be simple: She needs the cash and I want the pussy. No chance, she thinks, of me falling in love as I am married, own a business and have kids back home. However, to her surprise, while I am inside her, I hover over her, start moving gently and whispers "I love you" with a serious look in my eyes.

LMAO - the odds are good she would be freaking out and running for the door, clothes hurriedly scooped up off the floor, before I could even tell her that I was joking. ;)

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Avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels

Well, rickdugan, that's one way to get rid of them. LOL

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Avatar for mmdv26
mmdv26

@rickdugan

If you hadn't paid her yet, I think she would whisper back "yeah baby, f**k me.

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Avatar for farmerart
farmerart

NO! No. Noooooooooooooo.

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Avatar for steve229
steve229

"Sure. Many time to many dancers."

Huh? I guess even "lying, thieving, whores" need love, eh?

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Avatar for gk
gk

During a lapdance--as Tina Turner said--'what's luv got to do with it?'

But otherwise said it to a dancer--yes, after we developed a relationship. So you don't love the dancer, you love the person.

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Avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan

Yes I love you-r pussy on my cock.

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Avatar for Dougster
Dougster

steve: "Huh? I guess even 'lying, thieving, whores' need love, eh?"

There are some strippers who aren't stupid, lying, thieving whores, but it's extremely rare. Actually by definition they are all whores, but an extremely small percentage miss all three of the other adjectives. There are four levels of "i love you". I've met some who rise to level 2 or 3, but never 4, which I guess is what the OP was talking about.

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Avatar for motorhead
motorhead

Oh sure, once. But as Brett Michaels wrote, every rose...

Wish I had access to Peabody's Wayback Machine and get a do over

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Avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan

Oh those thieving lying whores.

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