Second OTC Experience

Good for you. Too much SS is a major turnoff. My money spends well elsewhere.

Once you have her in your hotel room, you might as well fuck her. If I cut off every stripper who has lied to me and strung me along and missed appointment times, I would never get any pussy.

I'm interested in the "to be continued" action. Either you'll have your way with her now, or she'll attempt to double up on the charges. There are plenty of fish in the clubs!

jackslash nailed it

Good for you for remaining firm (so to speak)! She totally disrespected your time and you did the right thing. By asking her to leave, you obtained the upper hand, which should be advantageous the next time you're in town. If it doesn't work out, remember that there are indeed plenty of fish in the sea.

I understand she wasted his time, and I get why you guys respect him for holding his ground, but seawa is just delaying the inevitable. I can't speak for him, but everything he's written from the first article to this one, strongly suggests he wants to have sex with her. And he'll probably end up doing it later down the road....so why delay things?

Sure, there are plenty of fish in the sea, but that takes the time of establishing trust with another dancer before she'll meet him OTC. He already has that trust established with this dancer.

seawa, stop stalling and just fuck her the next time you see her. Don't make me have to do it.

:-)

Nice article. I wasn't as strong as you when my ex-ATF pulled her SS routines; I'd always come back for more. And probably would again!

Good read, but I'm in with Go and Jack. SS comes with the territory. Once she finally showed up I would have taken the opportunity and maybe received a pretty good discount because of the lateness, but passing would not have been my choice.

I can see both perspectives. On the hand, you showed her you won't be disrespected and have your time wasted by telling her to leave. On the other, let some guys tell it you should consider it a win she showed up at all and probably should have just went with it at that point. I suspect next time she will know not to waste your time or she will say fuck it and there won't be a next time since she knows you won't see her at her leisure.

Nice story! I always have two competing feelings when it comes to OTC, and strippers in general:

1. Flakiness, lack of ability to honor commitments, and poor judgement come with the territory. Either accept it, or OTC isn't for you
2. At some point, there's a level of disrespect I won't take from anyone, even a stripper

Like you, once that girl had not texted me for hours, then finally on her way waaaay after that, I probably would have bailed. Not sure how I would have reacted when she showed up in my room -- if I was already steaming, I might have stayed firm like you did; if I was only irritated, I would have fuxed her.

Once I realize a stripper is particularly flaky -- and I usually realize that before we ever go OTC, as I try to arrange ITC appointments with her -- I'll often try to intervene. For many of the girls, passive aggressive behavior is the way they handle anything uncomfortable, which is why they won't bother texting you if they'll be late or wont' show up. So I tell them outright, "totally get it that you won't always be on time or have to cancel, but for me, I expect you to tell me early -- I'll make you a deal, you text me back early that you think you'll be late or have to cancel, I promise not to get mad; but if you do it late, I'll be pissed". Don't expect miracles, some of the girls can't help themselves, but sometimes knowing my expectations and knowing they get a "free pass" if they text me early they'll be late, gets their behavior to slide a bit from "stripper" to "normal person"

^^^ anyway, not to belabor the point, but setting clear expectations can help, sometimes. If you approach them like they're a child who needs to be taught proper behavior -- you can't treat them like that, but that's the psychology you need to have -- it can really help. Sometimes I'll make a funny little ceremony over it... I'll get her to agree that she'll text me if anything comes up, then we'll do a shot and pinch each other's nipples (or whatever goofy ceremony we come up with) to seal the promise. Like I said, don't expect miracles, but believe it or not, it can help a lot, when you already know beforehand the girl is flaky.

Good story.

I get being annoyed. But Subra made a great suggestion.

I think a discount would have been in order if she wanted to continue and you still wanted to be laid. But I get why you sent her packing.

Set your expectations and if she doesn't meet them find someone else who can.

If her being on time is important to you, then I applaud your decision to send her packing. Bad service in any industry should not be tolerated. It may not help you with her but it may help the next guy.

Since it was not me getting SSed; easier for me to play devil's advocate:

1. it takes two to tango - i.e. we expect the dancers to be on time at our beckon call - i.e. if we tell them we will be at the club at X time; she better be there waiting and available and not w/ anyone else; etc (same as for OTC) - but I would venture to say that perhaps us PLs also may not always be able to be at a meet-up (ITC or OTC) or be able to shwo-up at the agreed time and we expect the dancers to understand; i.e. does a PL not ever say he won't be able to make it after they have agreed to meet or at times also ignore dancers' texts?

2. many of these girls have complicated if not unstable lives - many may have an S.O. they gotta work-around; perhaps kids; if not other personal life matters that make it difficult for them to always make it and always be on time - if they were punctual reliable persons they would not be strippers (for the most part)

SS is baked into the equation - sorta like on a project often times one has to put in slack for potential cost and schedule over-runs that often happen - they (strippers) are what they are - if one wants a hot young chick that allows strangers to grope them and see them naked, and more; well they are not gonna be the most well-balanced responsible people, for the most-part.

IMO getting pissed at SS is a losing battle; you are gonnna be getting constantly pissed - it's like comedian Chris Rock said "it's like calling out a retarded kid for double-dribbleling; you just gotta let some shit slide".

Many experienced OTCers will say SS is the reason they often have more than one OTC dancer on their rouster (i.e. not putting all their PL-eggs in one basket) - in my unprofessional opinion it's best to expect SS and learn how to deal w/ it and around it than not expect it when it comes to dealing w/ strippers (especially OTC since IMO the more they are willing to do the more stripperish they are and thus the more unreliable they are gonna be, in-general).

So IMO if you are gonna be dealing w/ strippers especially OTC then learn how to accept SS or work around it b/c IMO often times the way many act is often really the best many of them can do under their circumstances - it's sorta the nature of the beast.

Ok. So generally I conduct all business, whatever it is, in the club. I almost never prearrange anything ITC either, because if what I was looking for isn't there when I'm there it's an opportunity to try something else. Having said that, I am trying to see what went down in the OP from the perspective of the author. I can, but really is kicking a provider out of your room who actually showed up gaining the upper hand? A flaky provider showed up and didn't get paid. There is no high ground here. You were mainly upset because you gave a flake too much power over your day. No judging there, but that was really the issue.

I went and looked for the other OTC article since it was mentioned. That first meetup sounded like it met expectations. Expectations are a problem, too. Last time I had a meetup OTC, I had zero expectations. Asked the girl after knowing her for an hour on a whim. It went eerily well, but this isn't about my story so the point is I had a back up plan I ended up not needing. If nothing else, I would have something do so I wasn't standing around looking like and idiot in public or sitting around wherever wasting the day away. If you're really looking for advice, what I would offer is try not to make these things personal.

^ yeap; on the advice of another TUSCLer ("clubber" I believe it was) I've kinda learned to SC w/o having expectations - if things go well; cool; if not; it's the nature of the beast (kinda like investing in stocks :)).

It's business (at least def for her) - no need to get emotionally wrapped-up - some business deals work out and some fall thru.

Welcome to OTC and SS. Flakiness and tardiness are the norm for many if not most of them. I have waited countless hours for my OTC dates over the past year. It still gets me mad but I have come to expect it at this point.

I think some of you are blessed with higher tolerance for stripper shit than others. And for you, it seems like you can just shrug it off. For the rest of us, we all have to draw our own lines as to where SS bleeds into getting treated like a bitch -- and IMO the right thing to do once you feel like you're being treated like a bitch, is tell her to fuck off.

Again, for anyone who has missed the advice: particularly if I can already see the stripper is flaky, I've found it useful to sit her down and give her a little talk about how I expect a text as soon as she knows she's going to be late or have to cancel, how it's no-harm/no-foul if she does so, but I'll be irritated if she doesn't. I really feel many of these girls are emotionally immature, and you really need to approach it with the mindset of teaching a child proper etiquette (but without talking down to them...lol). It absolutely can help, if the stripper is being passive-aggressive and not just forgetful

^^^ and when you do that talk, make it fun/funny... the little "seal it with a shot" closing ceremony I do is VERY well-received

If i have any change in plans, i notify her immediately. I expect the same courtesy . I don't mean half an hour late. Beyond that, notice should be given.

In the OP, She isn't a little late, she is over 4 hours late. I don't know Seawa's circumstances but for many of us, that would impact our billable hours or even other plans we have. Perhaps not in this particular instance but accepting it this time, might set the expectation for future encounters. What if the customer needs some medicine at a certain time? What if he has to call home at a specified time? Plans with friends? Another provider coming over?

I probably would not have sent her on her way but I am not Seawa. Her being on time is important to him. If we tell a provider to dress a certain way or perform a certain way and she doesn't we have the right to call it off.

I give'm about an hour to be late; after that I just move-on to plan B w/e that may be - but I would just take it in stride as typical/expected SS since I take it most strippers that are always late or no-shows will not change their behavior either b/c they don't want to or they can't.

i.e. if they show-up on-time; great - if not; I'm not surprised and I'll do my thing/plan-b and we'll try another time if she has not exhausted my patience

I call Bullshit on you holding firm or sticking to your guns. You didn't. If you truly felt disrespected and not waste any more your time at 7 when you "had concluded that it wasn't happening and got some dinner" you would've ended it there and not reward her when "She finally texts while I'm eating. SS of course. She still wants to get together blah blah. Okay, meet me at hotel at 8." Or after you tell her not to bother coming by and she "knocks on my door at about 9:30pm." and yet you still "let her in" obviously you still wanted something to happen and my guess is the real reason you were upset is not she wasted your time(that you assisted by allowing it to escalate each time)

I'd do the same. You have lot more patience than me.

Girl doesn't seem like a ROB. But totally unorganized. Worth giving her another chance if she's hot.

Sorry, but if I've already paid for the room, then I'm using the bed when she shows. I'd give her a chance to make it up to me between the sheets.

Righteous indignation = masturbation later that night.

I can make my point by not soliciting her in the future or by cutting my future offering rate due to past poor treatment.

Please don't take this as ridicule. We've all been there and I make no judgements. But my perspective is this: she didn't think your meeting was worth her time anymore and you're a bit of a PL for thinking she did.

You say she ignored your texts in the days before arriving. Why? She may be your favorite but it doesn't sound like you're her regular by any means. You probably don't see her that often or spend a regular amount on her....at least in her opinion.

When you get to the club you say "She sat with me for about an hour before we even talked about a dance". Then you wanted to get dinner with her to "discuss the details". How long does discussing details take and is she getting anything for this? Then she gets to your room at 9:30 and talks with you until 10:45. My thought is she viewed all this as you wanting multiple hours of free companionship (in the club, at dinner, chatting in the room beforehand, etc) with an uncertain reward for her at the end. When she blew you off for dinner you can be sure she was with her S.O. or a regular customer that offered more certainty ($s per time spent)

My advice: discuss the details BEFORE setting up OTC. Example: "I'm willing to pay $X hundred which will include you joining me for a nice dinner followed by X, Y and Z back in my room." That way she can internalize the compensation she is getting and know she gets the reward for showing up at the agreed time for dinner, etc.

Good luck out there.

If they were professional, they wouldn't be fucking for money.

I can see why a lot of services have drivers. Helps actually get the product there on time.

If this is as honest as you can get, you should stop going to strip clubs and start seeing a therapist. I don’t say that to be rude. I say it because when you wrote this you were in a car going 80 mph about to head over a cliff.

What makes you think you can treat a stripper like a hooker? For that matter, what makes you think you can treat a stripper like a non-person? She didn’t respond to your texts because she wasn’t ready to see you again. She was still trying to process her first OTC encounter with you. You didn’t go to her club to “get some dances.” You could have gone to any club for that. You went there to force the issue.

She was at the club that night because she had bills to pay. When she saw you in the club, she walked over to you because she had bills to pay. That said, I’m picking up clues that there were some feelings involved on both sides. She dressed up for you the first time. You like to tell your wife about your strip club experiences, but you didn’t tell her about this OTC experience. Did this dancer know you were married? Did your wife know about this particular dancer? How would you have felt about taking your wife to your “current favorite’s” club to meet her?

Your “current favorite” didn’t want to upset you or lose you as a customer, but she clearly wasn’t ready to meet you again OTC. So she stalled, hoping you would call things off. But you didn’t. When she felt she had no choice she finally showed up at your hotel, wanting to talk about where things were going, and you turned it into a “power play.”

No, I don’t think you had the upper hand at all. The only upside I can see to this story is that you probably fucked things up so badly with this dancer that you may have inadvertently saved your marriage.